Unofficially Attached
by becstothefecsio
Summary: Another story about fuck buddies: They banged and then sometimes cuddled. Both confident that neither would get attached. But she's inexperienced and rough around the edges. And he's a hopeless romantic and had a failed relationship to get past. (Reuploaded)
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** Because I'm a stupid idiot I accidentally deleted this story instead of another one. Luckily this website keeps the files I upload on it for three months so nothing is lost.

* * *

Jesse decided that jogging on Yom Kippur was a terrible decision despite how right it sounded to go on a jog the day he was supposed to atone for his sins while fasting.

Yeah, it didn't feel right when the thirst emerged.

He wasn't an observant Jew but Yom Kippur was a good challenge and fasting from sunset until nightfall had a lot of health benefits for a man in his late twenties.

October was only a week away and leaves were the only indication that it was Fall because it was still hot as a pizza straight out of the oven.

 _'_ _Stop thinking about food!'_ Jesse mentally yelled at himself.

He, of course, kept a bottle of water in his backpack and an energy bar in case he felt like he needed to break his fast and he was strongly considering pulling the bottle and drowning it.

 _'_ _No,'_ he thought to himself. _'Resist it, Swanson. Only a couple of hours left.'_

He went on to tell himself that by getting through 25 hours without eating anything would increase his chances of surviving a zombie apocalypse—the running would help with his stamina: he was confident he could outrun a zombie.

Jesse chuckled at his own thoughts and focused on the music playing through his earphones.

He estimated that he was about an hour away from his apartment and figured that once he got home he would order pizza to be delivered and get into the shower. But as he slowed down and eventually stopped running to check why there was a girl kicking the tire of her car in the middle of the deserted street, he figured it was gonna take him more than an hour to get home.

"You need help changing the tire?" he breathlessly asked as he removed his earbuds.

"No, the tires are fine, thanks," she told him. "There's no service: fucking perfect," she muttered after checking her phone and violently shoving her phone in her back pocket.

He was wiping his forehead as he eyed her: the first thing that caught his attention was the ear spike. She was casually dressed in a gray t-shirt that had the album cover of Pink Floyd's the eighth album, Dark Side of the Moon. A pair of denim shorts. Her hair was falling over her shoulders and she was using her sunglasses as a headband.

"Um, something is wrong with the engine." She jerked her thumb behind her. "There's like smoke and all."

"Mind if I took a look at it?" he asked.

"Be my guest," she sighed, having no better option than a random sweaty stranger offering his help.

He walked past her and reached inside the car to pop the hood then walked around and lifted the hood. He glanced up when she leaned in to look at what he was doing.

"You're low on coolant... just wait until the engine is cool enough and refill the reservoir," he told her while gesturing at the coolant reservoir then looked up. "You don't have any on board?" he guessed when she huffed.

He straightened up when she turned on her heels and walked around the car. He watched her open the car trunk.

She shook her head. "No coolant," she informed.

"Well, then, do you have water?" he asked. "You will have to check if you have to flush your cooling system and add antifreeze or not as soon as you can as I'm not sure your car is cut out to run on only water."

"I don't have any water left," she told him and removed the sunglasses that were holding her hair back to run a hand through her hair.

"Lucky for you, I do," he said and shrugged off his back bag.

"Thank God," she sighed. "Thank you!"

"Don't thank me just yet," he smiled at her. "Let's get the car running first." He gripped the bottle and swallowed.

He opened the bottle once he deemed the engine cool enough. "All right, start the car," he told her and watched climb inside the SUV and started the engine.

He saw the relief on her face once the engine started functioning.

"Are you headed to Barden?" He heard her ask as he tossed the now empty bottle in his back bag.

"Yeah," he answered, closing the hood.

"I can drop you off in town if you want," she offered.

"Sure, thank you," he accepted.

"No, thank _you,_ " she countered and watched him climb into the car.

"Jesse Swanson," he introduced himself and extended a hand to shake hers.

"Beca," she hesitantly took his hand and shook it.

"Just Beca?" he arched an eyebrow, letting go of her hand and fastening his seatbelt.

"Yep," she tightly smiled at him and wore her sunglasses.

"It's a pleasure meeting you, _Beca_ ," he told her.

"Likewise." She turned the steering wheel and got back on the road. "You alright there, man?" she frowned, watching him lean against the seat and close his eyes.

"Yeah," he nodded while rubbing his face.

"You look like you're about to faint," she noted.

"That would be because I haven't eaten anything in almost twenty-four hours," he sighed.

"Did you run away from your kidnapper or something?" she said, remembering that he was panting when he reached her.

He chuckled. "It's Yom Kippur."

"That sounds Jewish," she figured.

"Basically nothing goes into my digestive system for a total of twenty-five hours and I'm supposed to atone for my sins," he briefly explained.

"Right," she slowly said. "And you _run_ to atone?"

"Well, no. I just like to challenge myself." He shrugged.

"Starving and physical exertion don't usually pair well together."

"I have an energy bar in case I felt dizzy," he told her. "I know it's dumb," he admitted. "I realized that thirty minutes into the jog but I had to see if I could go through with it." He shrugged then rested his head against the window and closed his eyes. His fatigue was catching up with him: he promised himself that he wouldn't do this to himself ever again.

"Dude, don't die on me." He heard her say.

"I'm fine," he assured. "Just drop me off at the food joint you see," he added, sitting up.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, she was driving into a parking lot after he got a burrito and she got tacos at a Taco Bell drive-thru.

They never planned to have dinner together but it sort of happened. She suggested the drive-thru and he went with it. He asked her to stop at a grocery store so he'd get water so she parked the car in a grocery store parking lot.

"Go ahead, dive in," he nodded at the food on her lap as he unbuckled his seatbelt once she stopped the car.

"No, dude, I can wait," she shrugged. "How much longer do you have to wait?" she wondered.

"About fifteen minutes," he sighed after he checked the time on his watch. "I'm craving a cornetto," he shared with her as he reached into his black bag and pulled his wallet. "Got a favorite flavor?" he asked.

"Vanilla," she shared with him.

"Want anything else?" he wondered.

"No, I'm good," she replied.

"Okay," he nodded and got out of the car.

* * *

"Where do I drop you off?" she asked.

The food was eaten and they were currently enjoying the creamy cornettos.

"I actually live down that block," he informed as he gestured with his index at the direction of the block.

"Oh, cool," she said in surprise.

"Yeah." He reached for the door. "Thanks for the ride." He smiled at her, taking in her features once again before he left.

"Thanks for fixing the car." She smiled back, glad that he didn't ask for her number—she didn't even give him her full name and he got the hint. "Um, hey, wait," she called as he exited the car.

He rested a hand on the car door and looked at her expectantly.

"Do you mind if I used your bathroom?" she wondered. "I drank too much water."

"Not at all." He wore his bag. "You can shower in my bathroom if you want," he added.

"I'm gonna take that as a sign of hospitality and not a passive-aggressive way of telling that I need a shower."

He laughed at her words. "I'm the one that needs to shower." He didn't need to sniff himself to know that.

"Yeah, you really do," she agreed and stepped out of the car after grabbing her back bag then locked it.

* * *

Jesse led Beca into his apartment and closed the door after she got inside. "Bathroom is in that bedroom right over there," he informed and gestured at the one-bedroom in his small studio apartment and watched her pace to it then made his to the kitchen because he was still hungry.

He grabbed the whipped cream can and brought it to his mouth.

She was in and out of the bathroom in a few minutes. "Thanks for letting me use your bathroom."

"You're welcome," he mumbled before swallowing the whipped cream and turned around to look at her.

"Getting ready for Halloween," he said, seeing that she was currently eyeing the homemade pumpkin bong on his kitchen counter. "Do you want to smoke?" She looked up at the question.

"I'm not sure if I want to smoke pot off a pumpkin," she told him.

"It's perfect. I've tested it plenty of times." He grabbed a bag full of pot along with a lighter from on top of the fridge and placed them on the counter.

"You're letting a total stranger smoke your pot. This is a whole new level of hospitality… Weed isn't legal in the state of Georgia, I could be a cop for all you know."

"It's not legal yet. Besides, you're not a stranger. I broke my fast with you and I know your name." He paused then faked a gasp. "Unless you gave me a fake name."

"You're an idiot," she told him and grabbed the lighter.

He leaned against the counter and watched her figure out how to smoke from the pumpkin bong.

"I've never smoked weed with a stranger before," she told him after exhaling the smoke.

"Me neither." He shrugged. "There's always a first time for everything." He put the whipped cream can on the counter.

"For how long did you drive for your car to consume all of the coolant?" he wondered. "I'm curious."

"Like a thousand and five hundred miles," she gave him an approximation. "It's not even my car, I didn't think to check the reservoir." She shrugged, igniting the weed and inhaling from the pipe.

"Did you steal the car?" he frowned.

"No. I didn't steal the car. It's my Dad's car," she told him after exhaling the smoke in his face.

He inhaled it deeply. "I don't know, you could be a secret agent on the run."

"Yeah, one that doesn't know how to fix a car when it breaks down and smokes pot with the stranger that helps them with the car. A very smart secret agent."

"Or you're so deep in your cover that you have to pretend not to know how to do things?" He arched an eyebrow. "Oh, I got an even better one," he exclaimed. "You emptied the car's coolant reservoir on purpose and waited for anyone to stop and give you help so you would then sacrifice them to Satan."

She put the pumpkin on the counter. "You call it, man," she told him. "Any last wishes before you meet your fate?" she deadpanned and held back a smile when he laughed. He had a nice laugh. She liked his laugh.

"Yes. To reschedule in like seventy years," he told her.

"You got it." She stuffed her hands in her pockets and looked away in an attempt to play it cool when he caught her staring at his lips.

He stepped closer to her and leaned in when she looked up, fixating on her lips and closing his eyes when she leaned up and kissed him.

At first, it was nice and slow then escalated quickly. He didn't even know where all energy was coming from: he was picking her up and pinning her against the wall, kissing her passionately.

The way she was gripping his hair when he pulled away to let her catch her breath and buried his face in her neck was driving him crazy with lust.

"Touch me." He heard her say and pulled away from her neck to look at her. She wrapped her arm around his neck and pulled him towards her face, kissing him. He felt her smile when he slipped his hand under her t-shirt.

* * *

"Don't make it weird," Beca said once Jesse looked at her in confusion.

They were on the couch he had in the small living space in his studio apartment, both shirtless.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" he asked, pulling himself up.

"Because I don't think it was that big of a deal." She shrugged and rested her weight on her elbows.

"You should," he retorted. "Because you will always remember your first time."

"I'm gonna 'member the mind-numbing talk we're having right now," she deadpanned. "Yeah, I've never done this before and I decided to do it with you," she told him as she rubbed his side. "It's not a big deal," she mumbled and leaned up. He kissed her back when she pressed her lips against his.

"I'm sorry, I can't," he said, breaking the kiss, and sat up. "It's one thing to hook up with a girl I just met and another thing to take a stranger's virginity." He sat up and tried to maintain eye contact—it was hard not to look at her chest instead. "How old are you?" he asked while silently praying she wasn't underage. She looked young, he guessed she was in her early twenties but he was tired and hungry when he met her and could be wrong.

"Old enough," she mumbled.

"Hey, don't just leave," he said when she pushed herself up and wrapped an arm around her breasts to cover herself up as she looked for her bra.

"Why?" she asked. "You clearly said you don't want to have sex."

"I don't want to take a stranger's virginity," he corrected.

"Whatever," she mumbled, reaching down to grab her bra from the floor.

"Tell me something intimate about yourself," he requested as she wore her bra. "There has to be more to you than that scary ear spike." He patted the couch as he shifted a little at the discomfort his erection caused.

"I waited this long because I didn't feel comfortable letting another person see me naked," she answered the question he wanted to ask but didn't directly ask.

"And now you feel comfortable enough to let _a stranger_ see you naked?" He watched her sit down.

"If it goes horribly I'll never have to see you again." She interlocked her fingers and clasped her hands tight.

"It won't be horrible: I know what I'm doing," he assured her. "You will hate it at first, though, that's almost guaranteed. But that shouldn't last very long if you're relaxed and into it."

"I was into it before you started talking," she grumbled looking up to meet his gaze.

"You gonna have to give me a break, Beca," he chuckled. "This is huge. And I want to give you the best experience possible… it's a moral responsibility."

"Dude, stop beating around the bush and tell me: are we doing this or what?" she asked.

"This attitude of yours... is interesting." He scooted closer to her.

"It has gotten me in trouble before," she admitted.

"But you don't care," he figured. She shrugged. "I think it's hot," he told her as he tucked her hair behind her ear.

"I don't care what you think," she smirked, tilting her head to look at him. He grinned then leaned in, kissing her briefly.

"You might not think it's a big deal but I do: therefore we're changing the location." He cupped her face, pulling away. He then placed a kiss on her neck and picked her up bridal style.

* * *

"Hey, what's with the boxes?" she asked, gesturing at the boxes in his bedroom as he laid back on his bed after he tossed the towel, that he put on the bed to avoid staining his bedsheets with blood, in the laundry basket.

"Those are moving boxes that I've procrastinated unpacking," he answered as he adjusted the pillow against the headboard.

"Oh, you just moved here?" She turned on her side to face him.

"Yep," he nodded. "I used to live with my ex- when we broke up I moved out," he told her.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" she asked tilting her head to look at him, hearing him sigh.

"We lost our spark and I refused to believe it. Took me finding her in bed with another man to finally realize that we should have ended our relationship sooner." He clicked his tongue.

"That sounds horrible," she frowned.

"It's okay," he said with a shrug. "I'm getting over it." He smiled at her when she blew a breath to get the hair away from her face then reached and tucked it behind her ear.

"How long ago was this?" she hesitantly asked, feeling him cup her cheek.

"Almost six months ago," he answered as he rubbed his thumb against her cheek. "I moped around for a couple of months before it hit me that I was more upset about not ending the relationship when I should have than I was about upset about being cheated on," he shared with her.

She leaned up initiating a kiss in an attempt to comfort him and chuckled when he nuzzled her cheek pulling away. She then watched him roll on top of her and didn't hesitate to cup his face and pull his face towards hers.

"I don't know why I waited this long," she mumbled between kisses. "Sex is awesome… regardless of the painful part," she added when he broke the quite passionate kiss they were sharing.

"It _is_ pretty awesome," he agreed.

He found her excitement adorable and wanted to give her more but knew he wouldn't be able to go another round because he was _exhausted_.

He really regretted the jog.

He cracked his neck and leaned in for a kiss that he broke sooner than she would have liked. She was about to pull him back to her then clenched the bed sheet instead when he kissed his way down her torso.

"Relax." He placed a kiss on her inner thigh. He didn't have to ask to know that she never received oral. He kind of figured it out from what she said earlier in regards of why she postponed having sex. "I don't wanna brag but I'm pretty good at this." He grinned. "So just relax and enjoy it, okay?" He caressed her thigh. "Because this shall bloweth thy mind," he spoke in Shakespearean.

" _Thou_ are bragging," she told him.

" _Art,_ " he corrected.

"Shut up, Hamlet." He snorted at her quick response and leaned down.

* * *

When he woke up in the middle of the night at the sound of one of his neighbors closing a door in the most considered way possible, he was by himself.

To say the least, he was bummed out: He didn't know exactly what came next but he was planning on asking for ways to get in touch with her. Then again, she didn't even tell him her full name and it was clear from the way she was vague when mentioning personal details that she didn't plan to keep in touch.

Regardless, sneaking out without a proper goodbye still sucked.

He looked at the digital clock on his nightstand and saw that it was nearing midnight. And, as he closed his eyes he could feel sleep wash over him instantly so he postponed thinking about the events of the past day and enjoy his much-needed sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

He was pacing towards the diner he frequented most nights. As soon as he was inside the dinner, he began unbuttoning his coat as he looked for an empty booth.

Spotting one near the glass window he made his way to it and got seated. He was reaching for the menu when he heard a voice that sounded familiar and tilted his head.

It was _her_. If he thought he was mistaking her for another person the scary ear spike was there to assure him that he wasn't. The girl he met a week ago on the side of the road and help her fix her car and somehow ended up taking her virginity later the very same day was sitting right behind him and had her back to him.

"Beca?" he called. "Beca, hey, remember me?" he asked when she tilted her head and had a blank look on her face. "I helped you out with your car like a week ago," he reminded.

"Yeah," she said quickly so he'd stop talking.

He looked behind her at the person sitting across from her. "Oh, wow, Dr. Mitchell," he said recognizing the man. "Jesse Swanson," he introduced himself to the man who didn't seem to recognize him. "Makes sense that you wouldn't remember me. I graduated back in 2005… I'm the student that ended all of his essays with a movie quote," he said in an attempt to refresh the professor's memory.

"Movie guy, I remember you," Dr. Mitchell chuckled. "I always looked forward to your quotes." He shook his head in amusement. "You two know each other?" he then wondered gesturing between Beca and Jesse.

"Barely," Beca answered. "He helped me with the car when it broke down and that's it. Nothing happened after that."

"Son, come sit with us if you're here alone," Dr. Mitchell invited.

Jesse smiled at the friendly older man. "I don't want to intrude," he said.

"It's just me and my daughter." He gestured for Jesse to join them. "The more the merrier, right, Becs?" Dr. Mitchell checked with his daughter.

Jesse froze for a second: because what did his former college professor say?

"Yeah," she smiled tightly and avoided looking at Jesse when sat next to her.

Jesse cleared his throat as he tried not to think too hard about the fact that he not only had slept with Dr. Mitchell's daughter but also took her virginity.

 _'_ _How old did she say she was?'_ he tried to remember but nothing came to mind. So, he just hoped she wasn't underage.

"Are you currently living here or just visiting?" Dr. Mitchell asked.

"I've just moved back to Barden," Jesse answered. "It's cheaper to live here that it is in Atlanta."

"Oh, what do you do?" Dr. Mitchell wondered.

"I'm a financial analyst," Jesse told him.

"Weren't an art major?" Dr. Mitchell frowned.

"Double major, Music in Film Scoring, and economics because I needed a backup career." He shrugged.

"Hear that, Bec," Dr. Mitchell said, tilting his head to look at Beca who rolled her eyes. "Music is a hobby… you should focus on getting a useful degree instead."

Jesse looked at them and frowned. "Well, I don't know if I agree with you, professor." He paused. "I had personal reasons that kept me from pursuing a career in music, it doesn't mean everyone should give up and follow a career solely because it's safer."

"Everyone is entitled to their opinion." Dr. Mitchell shrugged.

"That I agree with," Jesse quipped. "You're enrolled at BU?" he asked Beca.

"Freshman," she curtly said.

Jesse breathed a sigh of relief just then: he didn't have sex with a minor.

She was in college. A freshman. Eighteen or nineteen.

He, on the other hand, was pushing thirty.

The age gap made him feel a mix of guilt and shame.

He shouldn't feel any guilt nor shame. They're both adults.

 _Stop fucking overreacting. Wait... She's a teenager. FUCK!_

"What is it?" Dr. Mitchell wondered when Beca's phone chimed with a text.

"It's just Drew asking if I could cover for him tomorrow at the radio station, he's sick," she answered as she typed back her reply.

"Did he catch something from that place?" Dr. Mitchell wondered.

"The radio station isn't that dirty, you know?" she deadpanned, placing her phone on the table.

Jesse wasn't blind to the tension between the father and daughter and decided to jump in.

"I interned there," he quipped. "Stacked a lot of CDs in my days," he recalled. "And no matter how much I'd stack there was always more…" he trailed off when the waitress brought Beca and Dr. Mitchell's order then took his order which was a burger and left the table again.

"Do you get to play music on the air or is it just stacking CDs?" Jesse asked as casually as he could.

"I sometimes get the station manager lunch when the other intern doesn't show up," she shrugged. "But mostly it's just stacking CDs."

"That sounds productive," he sarcastically noted.

"Tell me about," she deadpanned.

"You could have applied for an internship at the library instead," Dr. Mitchell said.

"And stack books instead of CDs?" Beca asked her old man.

"You'd get to shush people at the library," Jesse told her and smiled a little at the scowl she had on her face as he tried to calm himself down.

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy_.

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy._

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy_.

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy._

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy_.

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy._

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy_.

 _I did nothing wrong. She's a college student. It's not creepy._

"It's still better than the radio station," Dr. Mitchell opinioned. "At least you'd interact with people at the library."

"Dad, I joined that A Capella group," Beca reminded in boredom. "I _am_ interacting with people."

"You only signed up for that so I would keep my word, which I will, but I still want you to enjoy college to the fullest."

"By interning at the library?" she said in disbelief.

"All I'm saying is that you should try different things... things that aren't related to music."

"I'll see if there's an opening in the Quidditch club," she snarled. "Or you know what? I'll start my own club and call it anything but music club!"

"I did A Cappella, too," Jesse spoke before Dr. Mitchell could—he really didn't want to witness a fight. "Which group did you join?" he wondered.

"The Bellas," she answered and busied herself with her meal.

"Huh." He leaned against his seat. He remembered the Bellas: most of them were pretentious superficial assholes. "Do they still dress up like flight attendants and sing eighties jams?" he asked.

"Yeah," she sighed.

* * *

They were walking out of the diner. Dr. Mitchell was walking ahead of them heading to his car when Jesse asked, "can we talk?"

"About what?" Beca retorted.

"Well, for starters your age." He scratched his stubble, it was coming back to him: she never told him her age and he was way too turned on to resist her any longer so it was on him.

"Dude, relax. You didn't fuck a child," she spoke in boredom. "I'm eighteen. I can like vote and go to federal prison," she deadpanned.

"When's your birthday?" he questioned to which she rolled her eyes.

"I was eighteen last week, too," she sighed. "Hey, Dad, I think I'm gonna walk to my dorm," she said in a voice loud enough for her father to hear her.

"You sure you don't want a ride?" he checked.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"All right," Dr. Mitchell shrugged. "Take care of yourself, Becs." He then looked at Jesse and said, "Goodnight, Swanson."

"Goodnight," Jesse reciprocated and watched his former professor climb inside his car and drive off.

"Hey, wait," he called, realizing that Beca had walked away. She didn't stop walking so he paced after her. "So, we're not gonna talk?"

"I don't see why. But you seem like you want to, so go ahead, I'm listening," she sighed, stuffing her hands in the pockets of her jacket.

"I'm twenty-nine." He jerked his thumb towards his chest.

"Okay?" She glanced at him.

"The age gap doesn't bother you?" he questioned. "You don't find it _creepy_?"

"No, I don't see a problem." She shrugged. "Can you not blow it out of proportion?" She stopped walking.

He blew a breath. "I'm sorry. I respect your father so much—"

"What does this have anything to do with Dad?" She frowned.

"I've known your dad throughout college and he's a wonderful professor. And I took his eighteen-year-old daughter's virginity."

"I am my own person, Jesse," she firmly said. "What we did has nothing to do with Dad…" Her glare stopped him in his tracks: the mention of her father really pissed her off. It was a strange and quick transition from indifference to anger.

"Look, let's just forget about all this." She gestured with her hand between them. "Forget you about me." She turned on her heels and walked away, leaving him standing on the sidewalk.

He nodded to himself watched her for a few seconds then blew a breath and headed home.

* * *

Jesse was out for the night—He tried to break his routine that consisted of just going to work, stopping to buy dinner, or having dinner at his favorite diner, because cooking for one was just sad, then watching a movie or playing video games until he felt sleepy.

He knew some people in Barden but wasn't really friends with any of them. It felt weird and awkward to pick up the phone and make plans with someone he had little to no relationship with from back when he was in college so he didn't and he didn't want to hang out with his work colleagues, either, seeing them at work and outside of work was a lot, and being the new guy didn't help.

Jesse tried to go to different bars every time he went out, especially the newer ones, the ones that weren't there when he lived in Barden several years ago.

The first thing that caught his eyes once he set foot in the bar was a rainbow flag then another one and another one and another one and so on. He was at a gay bar and didn't think to check before he got in.

Gay bars were fun because the music was much better than the music at 'regular' bars, the atmosphere was just better, and they usually boosted his self-esteem when other men hit on him… but usually, he'd be there with a gay friend not all alone.

He walked right to the bar and took a seat on a stool then ordered a beer once the bartender acknowledged him.

It wasn't long before he got approached by a fellow man which was beyond flattering. Jesse, of course, made sure he didn't lead the guy on by telling him from the get go his sexual orientation, and they got into an easy conversation about the latest movie in the Marvel cinematic universe.

Being social and engaging in a conversation that he wasn't thinking of ways to end it was amazing. The alcohol buzz felt amazing and made him want to socialize even more.

"Excuse me," he excused himself and got up from his stool when he thought he saw someone familiar.

"Becaaaw," he called the five-foot-two girl at the bar waiting to order a drink, he wasn't even sure it was her. _'There's the scary ear spike, yeah it's her!'_ he decided. "Wait a minute," he narrowed his eyes when she tilted her head to look at him. "You shouldn't be here—" his words were muffled because she put a hand on his mouth.

"Shush, don't fuck this up for me," she told him only removing her hand when he held his hands up.

"Nice try," the bartender smiled when she showed him a fake ID.

"Fine, I'll get a diet coke," she sighed. "Thanks," she thanked the bartender once he put a glass of coke in front of her.

"Do you ever take this thing off?" Jesse asked as he rested an arm on the bar while pointing at the ear spike on her ear.

She sipped her soft drink and ignored his question.

"If you do does your ear feel lighter?" he went on to question.

"Why don't you get an ear spike and find out for yourself?" she countered while scanning the bar.

"I don't think I can pull it off." He shrugged. "It looks good on you," he complimented and followed the direction she was looking at.

"Are you here to creep on someone, Beca?" he teasingly asked.

"No," she curtly said.

"Investigate?" He grinned when she tilted her head to look at him and had a scowl on her face.

"You're really drunk right now," she noted.

"It is starting to get blurry but I still can make decisions I wouldn't regret in the morning," he said with a shrug.

"Which one is your guy?" he asked again, seeing that she was looking at a group of men.

"The lumberjack," she told him.

Jesse had to focus his vision to get a slightly better look at the buffed bearded man she was referring to—there weren't many men wearing flannels.

"Fact: people with big beards use them to hide food," he told her, tilting his head to look at her. "It's true, I swear," he promised when she rolled her eyes. "The dude my ex- cheated on me with would stuff popcorn in his beard... among other things."

"That's disgusting," she curtly said. "You personally knew him?" she hesitantly asked.

Jesse nodded. "We're all college buds: he, Hollie, and I," he told her.

"Well, he's a disgusting prick." She sipped her soft drink.

"He's actually all right." He shrugged. "When I don't think about the fact that he banged my then girlfriend." He took a huge gulp from his pint. "Who's the lumberjack?" he wondered.

"He's an audio engineer at a label in Atlanta," she told him. "I thought if I went and talked to him I'd get a shot at interning there." She blew a nervous breath.

"You wanna do what he does?" he asked.

"No, I want to actually produce the music not take care of the equipment: that's his job." She looked up.

"How many people do you think did what you plan to do?" he questioned.

"A lot." She shrugged.

"Then you shouldn't do it," he said in return.

"What do you suggest I do then?" she half-heartedly asked.

"You should go straight to the label and apply for the internship and if you're good enough you will definitely get it." He shrugged. "You don't need a middle guy. You don't wanna owe anyone anything. It really stings when they turn out to be _disgusting prick_ s."

His bittersweet tone made her crack a smile.

His ex-girlfriend cheated on him with a close friend, also known as the disgusting prick, yet he didn't hold a grudge. _'He's a weirdo,'_ she decided.

"Hey, I'm sorry," he apologized.

She frowned at his out of the blue apology and was about to ask why when he said, "I'm sorry for overacting the other time. You're right. It's not a big deal. You're an adult and so am I. I shouldn't have gotten weird about it and pissed you off." He gestured at her. "I guess I freaked out because I didn't even notice your age: I wasn't by any stretch responsible. I mean, I let you smoke pot…"

"Don't worry about it," she told him. "I've smoked pot before. You didn't corrupt me. As for my age, I have been told I have an old soul which as far as I can tell is basically being boring."

"I think an old soul is someone whose understanding of the world succeeds their age and experiences," he told her then glanced up. "Lumberjack is leaving," he informed.

She looked at the man as he walked to the bar's entrance then tilted her head to look back at Jesse.

"I think what you just said sounds like a pile of shit," she resumed the conversation, deciding to not go after the audio engineer.

"So you think you're boring?" he asked, deciding not to address her decision to not proceed with her plan.

"I can be fun." She shrugged.

"Just not in the traditional sense, I'm guessing based on the tattoos inked on your skin that _I'm sure_ were all done at a legal age."

"Oh yeah, I was definitely eighteen when I got all of them," she nodded, making him crack up at her sarcastic tone.

"You're most definitely not boring." He clicked his pint with the glass she was holding.

* * *

"So you were a Treblemaker, huh," Beca was saying as she and Jesse walked on campus grounds.

"Yep," He nodded and took a sip from his bottle of water—he stopped drinking because he didn't want to make a fool out of himself and as the night progressed started to sober up a little. "If the no sexual relations with a Treblemaker rule Bellas uphold is still a thing you technically broke it," he added.

"You're not currently a Treble, though," she shrugged. "The oath I took doesn't apply to you."

"Yeah, but does the oath specifically say 'if you hook up with a current Treblemaker then, bitch, bye-bye?" Okay, maybe he was still a little drunk because he wouldn't say that sober. "Or something that implies the guy has to be attending Barden University at the same time as you."

"No, it doesn't," she shook her head after taking a moment to recall the weird oath she took.

"Then it's settled." He shrugged, tossing the plastic bottle in the air then catching. "You broke the rule," he emphasized. "I won't snitch on you, though. So, don't worry." He looked around them. "Hey, I remember this place."

"No shit." She stopped walking when he did.

"No, this spot, I remember it." He started walking towards a tree.

"Okay," she slowly said and began following him. "You are such a cliché," she sighed when he put his phone's flashlight on the tree showing her engraved writing on it that read: J+H.

"I know," he chuckled. "I mean look at the heart," he added, gesturing at the heart engraved around the J+H.

"That's supposed to be a heart?" she questioned in surprise.

"Oh, cmon, it's not that bad," he defensively said.

"Sorry, Picasso. Didn't mean to disrespect the art," she deadpanned.

He ran his fingertips on the engraved writing and let out a sigh.

"Okay," he inhaled a deep breath and straightened up. "In what dorm your room is?" he asked—being the decent human being he was he insisted on walking Beca back to her dorm mainly because campus security made students carry rape whistles.

"Baker Hall," she told him and stepped back before they resumed walking. "The H is for Hollie?" she guessed.

"Yep." He nodded. "We've been together since sophomore year... I mean, we started dating back in sophomore year."

Beca frowned after doing the mental math, feeling really bad for him for wasting nine years in a relationship that ended badly.

"What were you doing at a gay bar?" she asked to take his mind off whatever he was thinking of. "Looking for some action?" she went on. She wasn't usually noisy but she hoped changing the subject would help out.

"No, I just went for drinks." He shrugged. "I don't swing that way."

"Going to a gay bar all alone when you're straight is a dick move," she voiced her opinion.

"Why?" he questioned.

"Gay bars and clubs are basically the one place gay people can go to and assume everyone is gay. If more straight people went there they'd have to ask if you're gay before hitting on you which defies the purpose of a gay bar," she explained.

"When you put it that way it does sound like a dick move," he admitted. "In my defense, I didn't know I was at a gay bar and it didn't seem right to just turn around and leave just because I'm at a gay bar." He shrugged. "Besides if I did leave I wouldn't have gotten to hang out with you of all people."

"I didn't think I'd ever run into you, again," she shared with him and kicked a rock.

"Barden is a small town." He opened the bottle and took a sip. "We're probably gonna run into each other again so why not do it on purpose next time?" he asked as they stopped walking having reached her dorm.

"Like go on a date?" she said in the most monotonic tone she could mustard. "No offense, but I think I can do better than an emotionally unavailable twenty-nine-year-old."

"I don't think that: I strongly believe that you can do so much better. You're smart and funny and any guy would be lucky to have you." He poked her shoulder with the bottle of water. "Let me word it differently." He paused. "I like you platonically and I wanna be friends with you." he casually said. "Would you like to be my friend?"

"Would you buy me drinks?" she asked.

He laughed then nodded. "Why not?" He shrugged. "Just drink responsibly and by that I mean don't get alcohol poisoning and die."

She rolled her eyes at his words. "There are more practical ways to end my life if I choose to take it."

"Oh yeah, like what?" he questioned.

"Pills then going to sleep, easy." She shrugged.

"Okay," he slowly said then pulled his phone from his pocket and unlocked it.

They exchanged phone numbers and said their goodnights. He felt good about clearing things up with Beca and properly apologizing and she was glad she wouldn't have to embarrass herself with a fake ID to buy liquor anymore if he kept his word.


	3. Chapter 3

"You keep whining about how I only text you to ask if you could buy me liquor," Beca was saying as Jesse let her into his apartment. "And to prove to you that I'm not using you for alcohol I brought this." She pulled a bag full of weed from her messenger bag. "Are you ready to get fucked up?" she asked, smirking at the look of pure surprise on his face.

"Where did you get this?" he asked and took the plastic bag from her.

"I have my ways." She shrugged and removed her messenger bag before she took off her jacket.

"So, how have you been?" he asked. He hadn't heard from her in a while which was classic Beca Mitchell. She was the kind of person that didn't like human interaction that much. And, he figured that she'd be busy with school since the last time he heard from her was around the time midterm exams started it. "How was winter break?" he wondered when her answer was a shrug.

"Cold," she curtly said. "How have you been?" she asked.

"The usual; full of excitement and joy," he deadpanned.

"What happened? Did you walk by a park and ended up reminiscing?"

"A bakery actually," he told her.

"Jesus, man," she sighed.

"I know." He nodded. "I'm making Chicken Scarpariello for dinner, should be ready in ten minutes. Are you hungry?" he was walking towards the kitchen as he talked.

"I could eat," she said as she followed him.

"I haven't cooked for a while so it might not taste that good," he gave her a heads up.

"Fine by me," she shrugged. He reached and grabbed a pack of rolling paper from a shelf where he kept spices then handed it to her along with a lighter.

* * *

"That's five points," Jesse said as he scribbled on the piece of paper on which they were keeping track of their scores once Beca placed the word SANTA, using her tiles, as they played Scrabble after dinner.

"Did he leave you presents under the Christmas tree after wiggling down your chimney and eating your cookies?" he asked while scratching his chin and he eyeing his tiles and taking a drag from their nth joint for the evening.

"No, but Grandma gave my vibrator for Christmas saying that it's the kind of toys I should be playing with," Beca casually mentioned and burst into laughter when Jesse got into a coughing fit.

"Your grandmother is one cool lady," he said as he cleared his throat.

"She's pretty awesome," Beca agreed. "Christmas at nana's always great and it actually snows back home."

"Where are you from, again?" he asked.

"Water Wonderland and Water-Winter Wonderland; The Wolverine State," she said imitating old-time announcers. "Birthplace of Diana Ross, Eminem, that serial killer who a Hollywood movie was made about… among other famous people that I can't think of right now: The state of Michigan! Aka, the greatest state in the country."

"Where exactly in Michigan? Do the hand map thing?" he requested, amused with of how proud she was of where she was from.

The hand map thing was a thing people from Michigan used to refer to places around the state because you can make an accurate map of the entire state just by using your hands.

"Port Huron." She held her left hand up and pointed at the joint of her thumb. "Where are you from?" she asked, taking the joint from him.

He laughed. "I don't think you'd want to stay friends with me after I tell you."

"No," she faked a gasp.

"Yes," he nodded while grinning at her like the idiot he was. "But my family moved to Florida when I was around seven."

"Fucking Ohio," she said in disgust. "I can't believe I'm friends with someone from that _shithole…_ I can't believe I lost my freaking virginity to someone from that _shithole_."

"Hey, stop insulting my birthplace!" He threw a tile at her.

"Oh, I feel so dirty." She shivered.

"Could you stop already?" he was laughing as he spoke. "You're not really going to stop talking to me just because I'm from Ohio… who's gonna buy you liquor?" He caught the tile when she threw it back at him.

"Good point... Still, Ohio sucks," she told him before she took a drag from the joint.

He sighed, deciding not to argue with her over a stupid old rivalry between the two state caused by a football game.

She blew a puff of smoke in the air and watched him place the tiles on the board forming QOPH. "That can't be a real word," she argued.

"It is," he assured and wasn't surprised when she grabbed her phone to look it up and found that by definition Qoph is the 19th letter of the Hebrew alphabet. He grinned when she tossed her phone the coffee table. "I don't think it's fair to use words from other languages."

"If it's in the dictionary it's legit." He shrugged. "What's the movie called?" he wondered. She frowned. "You said birthplace of Diana Ross, Eminem, and a serial killer who got a movie made about them," he reminded.

"I don't remember the title," she shrugged, forming BY on the board. "There's a scene where the serial killer gives this chubby dude a very aggressive hand job."

"Oh, I got it." He snapped his fingers. "Released in theaters in two thousand and four, Murder: written and directed by Patty Jenkins and stars Charlize Theron in the lead role," he said.

"Ding, ding, ding!" Beca responded.

"Theron got a Golden Globe and an Academy Award for her performance," he informed.

"Good for her."

"One of my favorite directors is also from Michigan," he told her while placing the tiles that formed the word JOB. "John Hughes." He grabbed the piece of paper to update their scores.

"Never heard of him." She felt his eyes on her as she pulled tiles from the bag.

"He made some of the most successful comedies during the eighties and early nineties."

"Well, I was _born_ in the nineties."

"I was two when The Breakfast Club, my all-time favorite movie, came out," he said in response. "I didn't see it until I was like fourteen."

"Never heard of it either…Not big on movies in general." She formed the word DEADEND. "I used all of the tiles, I get bonus points, right?" She looked up. "Is there a ghost dancing next to me?" Beca arched an eyebrow at the horrified look on his face.

"What do you mean you're not big on movies?" he questioned.

"I get bored and never make it to the end," she casually said.

"You just haven't seen a true masterpiece that got you hooked," he shrugged. "Lucky for you, I'm here to give you a movie education." He paused. "I'm gonna give you a movie-cation." He then got up from where they were sitting on the floor in his living area.

"Hey, what about the game?" she asked.

"The bonus is fifty points, you win," he declared.

"That's not how it works, the game ends when there are no tiles left in the bag," she told him only to get ignored.

He came back moments later with a DVD case in his hand. He walked straight to the TV and put the DVD in the player then walked over to the couch and hopped on it. He patted the couch after grabbing the remote control.

"I won't make you sit through the whole thing. I just wanna show you the ending then I can die a hero."

His overdramatic tone was funny in her opinion but she didn't show it because even high she could keep a scowl.

"Humor me?" he had a hopeful look in his eyes as he looked into her not so pleased ones.

She sighed and she put the joint out. "All right."

He was all smiles as she sat next to him.

Jesse skipped forward to the ending and hit play, and instead of watching the ending of the movie, Beca watched Jesse because frankly, he was far more entertaining with the way he mouthed the lines.

"You're missing the ending," he noted, tearing his eyes away from the screen for a second.

"Sorry," she apologized and didn't mean it. She looked back at him when he clenched his fist the same time the dude on the screen, who a hobo had better fashion than him, threw his fist in the air.

He felt her gaze and tilted his head once the credit started to roll.

He found her staring and gravitated towards her face, closing his eyes when his lips met hers. He leaned in, even more, when he felt her cup his cheek and rub her thumb against his cheekbone.

He could blame the weed he had been smoking but pot usually just relaxed him, it didn't influence his actions. He just felt like kissing her and went for it, as simple as that.

"Um, the ending is great," she awkwardly said after she pulled away. "I'm sure the beginning is just as great." She rubbed her nose, thinking. "I should leave," she figured.

He checked the time on his watch to see that it was 10:40 pm. "Oh, wow, It's getting late," he realized.

"Yeah." She scratched her head and looked back at him. "Can I keep what's left of the pot with you?" she wondered. "I can't exactly have illegal drugs in my dorm room…" she trailed off, eyeing him.

"Yeah, sure," he nodded and leaned in when she did.

He had no idea what was going on but kissing her felt right. She had to be feeling the same way based on the soft sounds she was making as they kissed.

"We shouldn't be doing this," he mumbled, slipping his hand under her sweater and rubbing his hand against her waist as he hovered on top of her.

"Because I'm too young for you?" she mumbled back.

"No." He broke the kiss and sat up. "Because we're friends. And friends don't hook up." He rubbed his eyes.

"Actually, some friends do." She pushed herself up then sat Indian style. "I don't see why we shouldn't."

He tilted his head to look at her and had a questioning look on his face. "Didn't we agree that we don't see each other that way?"

"No, we agreed that we don't wanna date each other," she corrected.

"Wait, are you saying that you want us to have casual sex?" he asked in surprise.

She nodded.

"Why?" he asked next.

She hummed then said, "Let's see… I've given hooking up with someone close to my age a try and it was pretty awkward and embarrassing." She cringed a little. "I don't want to sleep around with every willing guy I meet until I, like, figure _it_ out and get better at _it_ nor do I plan to get involved with anyone romantically for reasons I don't wanna get into." She paused. "I enjoyed sex with you and you're really nice to me. You're experienced, I can learn a lot from you."

"From what I understand, you don't want it to be a one-time kind of thing," he said.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"This kind of relationship is tricky and you're too young to be doing it."

She rolled her eyes then got up. "You know what? Forget about it."

"Don't do that." He watched her bend to grab her combat boots. "Don't just end a conversation you started: It's annoying." She was taking a seat on the floor to wear her shoes as he spoke.

"Here's why it's tricky especially for someone who lacks experience, regardless of age." He paused to gather his thoughts for a few seconds.

"You will most likely get attached without even realizing it because sex does that to a person." He watched her stand up after she wore her shoes. "You start to wonder if it really means something. And you get yourself hurt as a result," he explained as she grabbed her jacket to wear.

"Do you really want to your first heartbreak to be because of a friends-with-benefits relationship and not an actual relationship?" he asked when he met her gaze.

"We'll stop before it starts to get to me," she figured. "We won't let it get that far."

He let out a breath while rubbing his face not sure how to respond.

"It's fine if you don't want to do it," she mumbled, grabbing her messenger bag.

"It's not that I don't want to do it, it's more like I don't want you to hurt." He sucked in a breath and exhaled. "But if you really want to have a fuck buddy you will find someone instead of me, so saying no to you for that reason wouldn't _'protect you'_."

"Does this mean you're in?" she asked in anticipation when went quiet.

"I've never been in this kind of relationship before," he let her know. "I might not be the best guy for you." Beca sighed and sat down on the edge of the coffee table, facing him.

"I think you need this," she confidently said. "You've had a bad breakup and need some casual sex before you start dating again." She shrugged. "It's a win-win."

 _Pro: it's just sex between two consenting adults who happen to like each other physically and aren't looking for anything serious._

 _Con: it could ruin our friendship._

 _Pro: I can be her sexual Yoda._

 _Con: Romantic feelings can be developed._

He sighed because the biggest con was the possibility of developing feelings but that could be avoided if they communicated openly.

He'd be lying if he said that he didn't want to do it. He wanted some change. He actually _needed_ change. Having been in a relationship for so long kept him from exploring the glories of single life that everyone raved about.

"Okay, fine, I'm in," he decided.

"Really?" she said in surprise.

"Gotta set ground rules so we don't mix actual relationship stuff with what we're going to do." He grabbed the piece of paper and pen they were using to keep track of their score during the scrabble game.

"So, we just avoid relationship stuff, whatever they are," she quipped watching him lean against the couch while he drummed the pen against the paper.

"Don't keep yourself from seeing other people." She nodded at his words and watched him write it down on the paper. "And when we have other sexual partners we make sure it's always safe," he added. "I haven't been very active so I'm pretty sure I don't have any STDs but I'll get tested as soon as possible just to be safe. We were safe, so even if I do have anything there's no chance I passed it to you."

"Well, I'd never let a stranger put his wiener inside me unless it's wrapped in a condom. And, I've started taking birth control in November," she informed. "So, lesser chances of getting the ultimate STD if by any chance the condom doesn't do its job, I guess?"

"I'm a little disturbed that you're referring to babies when you say ultimate STD," he shared with her.

"For me, they are." She shrugged in response.

"Moving on," he said deciding not to get into it. "In the brief time I've known you I can tell that you don't particularly like to talk about anything too personal."

"You talk enough for both of us," she deadpanned.

"Yeah, you need to not let me do that," he told her. "Communication. Open communication. To minimize the chances of growing attached."

"Like talk about our feelings and shit like that?" she grimaced.

"Yeah, talk your heart out," he nodded. "I'm a great listener when I'm not talking. You will hear too much as well so rest assured that I wouldn't dare tell anyone about what you say to me." He watched her sigh and said, "Do you think you can do that? Do you think you can confide in me?"

"Yeah," she said instantly. "I want this to work, I'll do what it takes." She watched him write on the paper then took it from him when he held it her way.

 _-No commitment._

 _-We don't do things couples do._

 _-Open communication._

"Seems good to me," she said after going through the short list. "I mean you could have just said these things instead of writing them down," she mumbled looking up.

"Felt right to write them down." He shrugged. "Should we shake hands to seal the deal?" he asked as he tossed the pen he used on the coffee table.

"I think getting right into it is how you _seal_ this sort of deals," she opinioned and stuffed the paper in her jacket's pocket.

"Makes more sense," he nodded in agreement.

"Then let's get into it, shall we?" she asked while putting her messenger bag on the floor.

"There's that bossy attitude." He grinned lazily at her when she climbed on his lap.

* * *

"Medicinal Marijuana is legal in Michigan," Jesse said as he hopped on the couch after getting rid of the condom. "You got the pot from Michigan," he figured and shook his head when she held the joint she was smoking towards him.

"Grandma has a weed card," she informed, taking a drag then placing the joint in the ashtray to pull her sweater over her head. "And she was a grade A hippie back in the seventies. She lets me smoke pot because believes it helps you deal with stress and anxiety." She picked the joint and brought it to her lips.

"How did you manage to fly with weed safely?" he wondered as he grabbed the remote control and began flipping through channels.

"I just put the bag in a shampoo bottle," she blew the smoke then stretched.

"Beca, you could have gotten in serious trouble." He tilted his head to look at her.

"I've done this before."

"How many times?" He arched an eyebrow.

"I have snuck weed in my suitcase for two years now, whenever I'd visit Dad," she told him.

"You got more balls than most men do," he said in admiration. "But you shouldn't do that anymore. You're in college now, they will start checking your luggage for drugs at airports especially when you're traveling from a state where weed is legal," he reasoned with her. "I'll hook you up, okay?"

"Thanks," she thanked him, smiling at him.

"Yeah, sure." He leaned in and placed a peck on the crown of her head.

"So, did _she_ work at the bakery?" she asked after she finished tying her shoelaces

"No," he sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

"You're not gonna make me guess until I get right, are you?" she asked.

"The bakery made cupcakes that she could eat despite nausea. I used to go there every morning and buy them for her," he told her as he fixated on the TV screen.

"Nausea?" She arched an eyebrow.

"Morning sickness is the term but I don't like it because the nausea wasn't just in the morning... it's not accurate." He shrugged.

"Wait, do you have a kid together?" she questioned.

He shook his head. "But I did knock her up senior year in college."

"I'm sorry," she apologetically said.

"It's okay." He shrugged. "It wasn't meant to be." He paused, tilting his head to look at her. "Sometimes, I think it was for the best that we lost the baby. We weren't ready to be parents. Hell, I don't think I'm ready to be a parent and I'm at an age everyone expects me to want to be one."

"Well, screw social norms, man. No, one should do something just because everyone expects them to do it."

"Like getting a college degree?" he said knowingly.

"Not that I actually care, but it's socially acceptable to not go to college just not in my father's books," she deadpanned.

"Well, I see where he's coming from." He shrugged. "He's a college professor. Makes sense that he'd want you to have a college education."

"I know," she sighed.

"Hold on." He frowned. "Why did you get dressed? Are you leaving?" he asked, realizing she was fully clothed unlike him who was sporting a pair of boxer shorts only.

"Yeah," she nodded and pulled one final drag from the joint she had been smoking before she put it out.

"It's late, spend the night over." He sat up when she stood up.

She shook her head while exhaling the smoke and wearing her messenger bag. "I really can't stay."

"But… _Baby, it's cold outside,_ " he sang then grinned when she rolled her eyes.

"Do you see a bib around my neck?" she asked as he stood up.

"You're supposed to say ' _I've got to go away_.' Then I would sing ' _Baby, it's cold outside_ '," he sang. "Then you'd go ' _This evening has been_ ' and I cut you off singing _'Been hoping that you'd drop in'_." He expectantly looked at her waiting for her to sing with him.

"I don't know the words," she told him with a shrug.

"It's okay, I can sing both parts." He proceeded to take her hands in his as he continued to sing both parts and gave her a pretty decent performance where he showed off his dorky dance moves and danced with her—it wasn't much dancing as it was twirling her around.

When he finished, he was down on his knees with his arms opened wide open because Jesse Swanson got carried away.

"Are you done?" she asked while holding back a smile.

He took a moment to think then nodded and stood up.

"This was really entertaining, but I'm still gonna leave." She patted his cheek.

"Damn it!" he grumbled in mock annoyance. "All right, then wait until I put some clothes on and drop you off to campus."


	4. Chapter 4

Jesse woke up to the sound of his cell phone ringing. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes as he reached for the phone and grabbed it from the nightstand.

"Yeah?" he spoke in a low voice to avoid disturbing Beca's sleep.

 _"He's not dead,"_ the other person said, their voice sounding a little far.

"What do you want, Adam?" Jesse questioned and glanced at the time. "It's Saturday and it's barely eight, go back to bed."

 _"I've been trying to reach you since yesterday and you wouldn't pick up the phone. Chloe thought you're dead. I told her I would have sensed a disturbance in the force if you were, in fact, dead: she didn't believe me."_

"I've been busy," Jesse told him as he scratched his stubble. He had quite the day. Beca had told him she wanted to know her limits i.e. how long she could go before exhaustion kicked in and so they arranged a sex marathon … she was far more energetic than him but he managed to keep up with her until she fell asleep.

Her enthusiasm was infectious and kept him going—that and hydrating, having good stamina, and eating food high in zinc.

Falling asleep first determined who lost and who won: he couldn't wait for her to wake up so he could rub it in her face that he won the marathon that they both assumed she'd win.

 _"Here's Chloe, she wants to talk to you,"_ Adam told him.

 _"Hey, Jesse,"_ Chloe greeted.

"Morning, Chlo," he smiled at the sound of her voice. "How have you been?" he asked.

 _"A little tired but overall great,"_ she sighed. _"Birthday preps are going great."_ She paused and it was his turn to sigh. _"You're coming, right?"_ she hesitantly asked.

"Of course I won't miss it," he assured.

 _"Awesome,"_ she beamed. _"So, I've been getting the guest list together and wanted to know who you're inviting from Barden and like if you made new friends you'd like to invite."_

 _"This is why I'm awake at eight in the morning."_ Jesse heard Adam holler and chuckled.

 _"It's your birthday, too, Adam, stop being such an ass."_ He heard Chloe say next. _"So, how many people I don't know are you inviting?"_ she then asked him.

"I really don't know," Jesse honestly said. "I don't know if I'm inviting anyone to be honest."

 _"Oh, that's okay,"_ she sympathetically said. _"I'll email you the guest list before I email people invitations to your big three-o birthday party."_

"I'll make sure to check it out and get back to you," he told her and tilted his head to look at Beca who had woken up.

She was stretching when he hung up the phone.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," he said as he placed the phone on the nightstand.

He grinned when she rolled her eyes. "I had morning classes and I came over right after Bellas practice," she told him. "You had just woken up from a nap when I got here."

"Excuses, excuses, excuses," he sang.

"Shut up." She threw a pillow at him.

He laughed, catching the pillow.

"Name your prize?" She rested her weight on her elbow as she turned to face him.

"Breakfast and a back rub," he decided after giving it some thought.

"Breakfast and a back rub?" she echoed in response, surprised with his choice.

He nodded. "I want pancakes and I think I still have orange juice so that too." He paused. "And I want it in bed. So breakfast in bed _with you_ and back rub... also a neck rub."

"Okay," she sat up while holding the duvet close her chest.

He thought it was weird that she always tried to cover up when they weren't engaging in sexual activity but didn't comment. She was weird about a lot of things. One of the weirdest things she did was leaving once he fell asleep, he couldn't understand why she'd sneak out almost always but he never brought it up.

Her clothes didn't make it to the bedroom. He didn't want her to feel uncomfortable so he climbed out of bed, not having a problem with walking around nude, and grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of boxer briefs from his wardrobe for her and got himself a pair of boxer shorts.

"Thanks," she thanked him, accepting the clothes.

He busied himself by wearing the boxer shorts to give her some privacy so she'd get dressed.

"If I burn your apartment down, it's your fault," she told him and hopped off the bed.

* * *

Jesse sat up when Beca walked into his bedroom holding a tray. "Thank you," he thanked her as she placed the tray on his lap.

"Is it weird that I only orgasm from oral?" she asked breaking the silence they got in as they ate breakfast. "We've had a fucking marathon and it didn't happen from penetration."

"No, it's not weird," he told her after swallowing. "You're perfectly fine. A high percentage of women only orgasm from simulation… And don't think too hard about it, you're only eighteen." He shrugged.

"Nineteen, actually," she corrected.

"When was your birthday?" He tilted his head to look at her.

"Back in November. The day after I ran into at that gay bar," she informed.

"Why didn't you say something? I would have gotten you a drink at least." She shrugged in response.

"I believe a massage is in order," she stated having finished eating breakfast.

"Yes, please." He placed the tray on the nightstand.

"Right, how do I do this and not accidentally break your neck?" She cracked her knuckles after getting on her knees.

"You try not snap my neck as tempting as it gets because you know you still need me around for sex and alcohol," he replied, as he reached inside one of the drawers of his nightstand and pulled a bottle of coconut oil.

"Fancy. You use coconut oil instead of vaseline to masturbate," she noted.

"You're hilarious." He handed her the bottle and laid on his back.

"You really don't know how to give a massage?" he said in surprise, realizing she wasn't kidding because what she began to do actually hurt.

She shook her head when he tilted his head to look at her.

"That's okay." He shrugged. "You're a really fast learner," he told her. She snorted so he said, "No, really, you learn quickly." He was impressed with fast she learned to give excellent blowjobs: all she needed was some guidance and voilà.

He then went on to walk her through it, and just like he thought she figured it out—it wasn't Rocket Science after all.

"Your turn," he announced as he pushed himself up and rotated his neck.

"Dude, you won and that was your prize," she stated.

"Well, I want to give you a back rub," he retorted. "Unless you don't want one...wait, I know that look," he noted then grinned when she rolled her eyes. "I know what you want," he confidently said before he leaned in and pressed his lips against her and laid on his back when she gently pushed him then got on top of him.

It had been a month since they started hooking up with no strings attached. Things were too good between them and he was waiting for something to happen and messed it up.

Beca wasn't a fuck buddy, she was a friend, a friend who he got to have sex with. Their relationship was based on mutual respect and was purely physical.

He wouldn't exactly call her mature because, fuck that, no nineteen-year-old is mature. She was, however, smart.

"Wanna take it somewhere else?" she asked pulling away to catch her breath.

"Where do you have in mind?" he asked.

"The shower," she answered. "Or not, I heard it's overhyped," she added when she clocked the discomfort that mentioning shower sex brought on his face.

"No, no, I'm down," he assured her. "It's just that last time I tried to have sex in the shower I fell and almost broke my neck."

"Then we're definitely not gonna do that," she figured.

"Hollie is five nine, I'm five ten, and we tried a position that wasn't for people who are close in height," he told her, sighing at the memory. "You're significantly smaller than me and weigh nothing, shower sex with you can't go wrong," he confidently said, leaning up.

"You sure?" she checked as their noses touched.

"Yeah," he nodded and pecked her lips. "Besides, I have a shower mat. No more falls in the shower for this guy."

* * *

When Beca left, Jesse decided to watch a movie but ended up napping instead which wasn't unusual ever since he and Beca started hooking up—She drained him and he had no complaints.

He had been napping for what he thought were a few hours when he woke up to his phone ringing for the second time today.

"Hey, Becs, what's up?" He stifled a yawn.

 _"Sorry for waking you up,"_ she apologized. _"I haven't gotten used to the fact that you sleep more than a freaking sloth yet."_ He heard her deadpan and smiled.

"It's okay. Need anything?"

One of the things he liked about Beca was how direct she was. If she wanted booze she'd just ask for it, same goes for sex. However, she did act weird when asking if they could have sex which was why she avoided asking over the phone and usually texted him _'Are you free?'_ so his guess was alcohol.

 _"I found an abandoned kitten and I don't know what to do with it. It's late there aren't any shelters open."_

He realized then that it was around eight pm and that he had slept through the day.

 _"I can't leave it outside 'cause it's gonna rain and I don't think it's old enough to survive the night."_ She was worried about the kitten and it was too freaking adorable coming from a girl who constantly masked her emotions with sarcasm.

 _'_ _Bring it over,'_ he automatically wanted to say. "Hold on, are you sure its mother didn't just leave to get food?"

 _"I'm pretty sure its mother left for good. I've heard it meowing yesterday when I left campus, then again today around two. And, I just left my dorm room to grab dinner and heard it again so followed the meowing and found it."_

"Okay, bring it over," he told her and pushed himself up into a sitting position. "Did you have dinner?" he asked before she could hang up.

 _"No,"_ she answered curtly.

"Pepperoni pizza?" he suggested.

 _"Yeah, sounds good."_

* * *

"I wanna make a joke about the fact that you're soaked wet and holding a pussy but I won't because I have a feeling you will probably kick me in the nuts," Jesse said as he let Beca into his apartment.

"Wise," she said, sniffling.

"Gotta give this guy a warm bath," Jesse was saying as he took the small meowing black kitten that had white paws and chest from her. "He's freezing," he added after lifting the tiny kitten just enough to see its sex.

"Change into something dry," he then told Beca. "And put your clothes on a radiator."

"Okay," she nodded and followed him into his bedroom.

He left her alone to change and went into the bathroom and soon realized he didn't know how to give a really tiny kitten a bath and not kill it. He walked back into the room to grab his phone from the bed where had previously left and quickly googled how to bathe a kitten then tapped on the first result.

The article provided a lot of useful information on how to clean the little animal up but recommended using cat shampoo, so he looked up DIY cat shampoo and hoped to find something useful. The replacement was dish-washing soap.

"Hey, Becs, could you go grab the dish-washing soap? It says here on a forum that it's what we should use to bathe him." He looked up from his phone and, man, did she look good in his clothes.

"Sure," she nodded and paced out of the room.

She came back in less than a minute later. "Here you go." She placed the bottle on the sink. He stepped aside from the sink and said, "Wash your hands, dinner was delivered like five minutes before you came," he told her.

"You don't need help?" she asked.

"No, I'm good." He shrugged.

* * *

"I looked up how to tell his age," Beca said as she watched Jesse take a seat on the floor and next to a radiator while he held the small animal in a towel.

He lifted his head and watched her make her way to him while holding a pizza box.

"What color are his eyes?" she questioned.

Jesse looked down at the kitten and answered, "Blue."

"Okay, so he's still under five weeks." She nodded to herself and sat down Indian style next to him and put the pizza box between them. "Can you get him to open his mouth?" she asked while scrolling down the article she found.

"Yeah," he nodded and went on to gently part the kitten's mouth. "What are we looking for?"

"Baby teeth, the incisors," she mumbled biting into the slice of pizza she was currently eating and leaned in to see for herself. She couldn't see anything because Jesse was feeling the kitten's gum with his index finger

"There's more than the incisors teeth, Bec," he told her. "I can feel his canines."

"According to this article, which seems legit, little dude is between three to four weeks," she told him.

"Well, little dude is hungry," Jesse said while pulling his index finger from inside the kitten's mouth.

"I'm looking up an emergency replacement for his mama's milk right now," Beca told him while typing on her phone.

"So apparently cats are lactose intolerant," Beca said. "But for emergencies, we can feed kittens cow milk mixed with vegetable oil and raw egg yolk," she informed. "Do you have these?" She looked up.

"Yeah," he nodded. "Here, keep him warm, I'll go make it." He handed her the meowing kitten that was folded in a towel then took her cell phone to follow the recipe and paced to the kitchenette.

* * *

"Do you think he'll make it?" Beca asked as she leaned against the couch while Jesse held the kitten close to him and fed him the DIY milk through a syringe he found in his first aid kit.

"I hope he does," Jesse answered without looking up. "Because I'm keeping him." He was a goner from the moment he saw him.

"He's so soft," Beca noted as she ran her hand over the now dry kitten she then picked him up once Jesse put the syringe on the coffee table.

"What are you gonna name him?" she wondered.

"I was thinking Thor given the circumstances you found him in." He tilted his head. "You know Thor?" She shook her head. "He's the Norse God of lightning and thunder."

"Thor is nice." She hugged the kitten giving him more warmth as he dozed off.

"Gotta a middle name in mind?" he wondered. "You found him, you're entitled to give him a name."

She caressed Thor while thinking. "Oreo."

"Thor Oreo," he said then chuckled. "He's black but has white fur in the middle. Perfect." He paused. "I'm gonna called him Thororeo instead of just Thor."

"Thororeo is cute," Beca mumbled.

"Do you wanna go to the pet store to shop for Thoroeo with me tomorrow?" Jesse asked, tilting his head to look at Beca. "He's basically our baby, Beca. He's our ultimate STD… just a little furry," he said, referring to what Beca called babies when they talked about birth control.

"A lot furry." She sighed. "He's your cat. I was planning to take him to a shelter," she clarified. "I'll go with you shopping as _a friend_." She watched him grab his cell phone from the coffee table.

"C'mon, we're taking a family picture," he told her, ignoring what she said.

"Dude, no, I look like shit," she refused.

"Nonsense," he disagreed as he tapped on the camera icon and changed it to the front camera before he scooted closer to Beca.

"We don't have pictures together," he told her when she pulled her head back. "I need proof that you exist so I can brag about banging a nineteen-year-old to my brother," he told her.

"You have a brother?" she asked in surprise.

"Yeah, a twin actually," he informed. "But we're not identical, we barely look alike."

"Why am I just finding out about him?" she wondered.

"The topic of siblings never came up." He shrugged.

"How many siblings do you have?" she asked next.

"Two," he replied. "Adam and Sarah. Sarah is thirty-five. Now get close and let's take a picture, please?" He gave her puppy eyes.

"Fine, but you'll delete it if it's awful," she said giving in.

"Okay," he agreed and went on to tuck the hair that fell on her face behind her ear then tilted his head to look at the camera.

She pulled the hoodie over her head because she was feeling a little self-cautious over the state of her air-dried hair then held Thororeo up and couldn't help the grin that made its way to her face when Jesse grinned while pointing at the sleepy cat.

"It's cute, right?" he asked, tilting his head to check with her after taking a photo.

"Yeah, I guess I don't look like I'm hungover," she shrugged. "Because that's how I usually look without makeup."

She thought they actually looked cute as fuck but wasn't going to tell him.

"You look fine. You have nice skin," he complimented. "For a teenager," he added and got shoved in the shoulder.

"God, he's so adorable," Beca gushed, which was so out of character. She was usually meh about everything. Jesse wanted to point it out then figured it was best if he didn't because she then would realize how much she had let him see of her mushy side that was hidden behind the hundred layers of apathy and sarcasm.

He instead sneaked a photo when she rubbed her cheek against the fury small animal. He knew she was going to notice that he noticed the fact she had let her guard down because he had a wide ass grin on his face.

 _'_ _I need a distraction,'_ he thought to himself and took a look at him before he stood up and walked to the radiator across the room. He grabbed her clothes and a t-shirt of his that were getting heated up on the radiator and made his way back to the couch. He put her clothes near him when he sat then picked the empty shoebox that was going to serve as a temporary bed for Thororeo.

He neatly placed the t-shirt, which Beca recommended he warmed up a little before he put the kitten to sleep on it, inside the box. "Sleep tight, buddy," Beca said then gently put the kitten in the shoebox and watched him curl up.

"Do you want some milk before you go to bed?" Jesse randomly asked as he folded her clothes busying himself.

"What am I, a four-year-old?" she snorted.

"You haven't hit your twenties, you still need your calcium for growth," he shrugged and placed her folded jeans, t-shirt, bra, and jacket on the coffee table.

"No, I'm good," she told him and rotated her neck. "I made peace with my height and know for a fact that this is it for me."

"Tea then?"

She shook her head, stifling a yawn.

"Alright, suit yourself." He got up. "I'm making tea for myself."

She curled up in the fetal position and pulled the sleeves of his sweatshirt before she rested her cheek against the back of her hand.

It felt weird to share a bed with him without the intention of having sex so she pretended she had fallen asleep when he walked back to the living area. She felt him watched her for a few seconds then heard him walk away only to come back less than a minute later to put a comforter over her body.


	5. Chapter 5

"I got held up at Dad's longer than I thought I would," Beca was saying as she closed the door behind her. "Is this Adele I'm hearing?" she asked as she watched Jesse bring the bottle of vodka he was holding to his mouth.

"Had fun at your Dad's?" he asked after swallowing, ignoring her rhetorical question.

"We played chess," she deadpanned. "And talked about our day." She took off her jacket while following him into the apartment. "So much _fun,_ " she said every word dripping with sarcasm.

She shook her head when he extended the bottle her way as she grabbed his iPod from the deck system to change the depressing music. "Are you okay?" she asked, looking up after scrolling down the playlist he had put together. "There's a disturbing amount of break up songs on here." She put the iPod back in the deck after playing Regina Spektor's Two Birds instead of Adele's someone like you.

"Yep." He nodded and put the bottle on the kitchen counter. "I'm dope as fuck."

"The smell of vodka stings," she told him when he wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned in.

"Would it sting less if I brushed my teeth?" He pulled his head back.

"Yeah," she nodded and patted his cheek.

"Okay," he said and rubbed his nose before he began making his way to the bathroom. When he came back she was looking at his laptop which he left on the counter.

"I'm so sorry, Jesse," Beca apologetically said and looked up from the laptop when he sat on a stool.

He was logged on Facebook and was on a Hollie Jacobson's page. She only had to glance once to find out the reason behind the way Jesse was behaving: his ex-girlfriend was now engaged to a Charlie Harris who happened to have a huge beard which she knew the man who his ex- cheated on him with had.

"I'm not mad at them, you know?" He shrugged, clasping his hands. "I just don't get it. Were they hooking up for long behind my back but didn't come forward because they pitted me? They're clearly in love. And, I was clearly in their way." He sniffled and looked down at his hands. "What did I do to deserve this?"

Beca felt bad for him but didn't pity him nor did she have an answer. She reached for his hands and gave them a squeeze. "These assholes hurt you so bad, Jesse, and you've dealt with it quite maturing." She paused because she needed a moment to remind herself that getting a rant about how shitty the newly engaged couple were wouldn't help. "You never talk shit about them even though they deserve it. You're trying to move on and you will eventually."

She held his chin up to make him face her because he was staring at their hands the whole time.

"You're a decent man who just had a bad experience." She shrugged. "Don't let the news of their engagement cut open your healing wound."

 _'_ _Deep shit, Mitchell.'_ She thought to herself as the words left her mouth.

He was nodding so she assumed what she was saying was in some way helping.

"You should probably stop checking her Facebook page." She patted his hand.

"I try not to. But I just can't. I have to check up on her every now and then."

"Why do it when it hurts?" she asked in confusion.

He shrugged. "I guess, I should block her." He looked his laptop. "When words don't look like ants," he figured then let out a breath. "Thanks, Becs," he smiled at her but didn't reach his eyes.

"You're welcome," she smiled back. She looked between his eyes and lips while he did the same then leaned in for a kiss, cupping his face when he leaned in as well.

"Is my breath okay?" he asked. Her response was to nod before pressing her lips against his.

He broke the kiss, almost falling from the stool, then took her hand as she led them to his bedroom.

He was sloppy but she didn't mind as they, figuratively, ripped each other's clothes off.—she ended up doing most of the undressing to avoid the awkward pauses.

She knew she was going to be in total control because he was _that_ drunk and the thought thrilled her.

* * *

Jesse's head was on her shoulder while his arm was wrapped around her. She was caressing his hair as he slept, thinking about the state he was in before falling asleep: he was a mess.

She wondered if he'd wake up feeling any better after crying himself to sleep and also wondered if he'd remember crying in the first place— she didn't know what to do when he began to silently cry after they finished and embraced him in her arms when he asked for a hug.

She felt bad for him but couldn't relate to him for the life of her. She didn't know what he was going through. It seemed like it hurt a lot and made her dread heartache.

Hearing meowing coming from outside the bedroom, she figured that Thororeo was hungry and realized that she was hungry, too.

She slowly removed herself from Jesse to avoid waking him up then climbed out of bed. She picked up her panties and Jesse's t-shirt and exited the room.

"Here you go, buddy," she said to the kitten once she put some food in his bowl.

She usually left right after he'd fall asleep but it didn't feel right to leave when he's hurting and in a need of a friend so she spent the night.

* * *

"Good morning," Jesse throatily said as he walked into the kitchen the next day pretty surprised to find Beca there making pancakes.

"Top o' the Mornin' to Ya!" she said in response as she turned off the stove. "I hope you're hungry," she said, gesturing at the plateful of pancakes on the counter.

He smiled at her and nodded despite the fact that he was hungover and had puked up in the shower. He didn't have to think too hard to get what she was doing and he truly appreciated it.

"So, I'm going to get a tattoo, would you like to tag along?" she asked, looking away from his gaze that he realized made her uncomfortable.

Beca didn't know how to help but knew that staying home and moping around wouldn't.

"Today? You're getting another tattoo today?" he said in surprise.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"Of course I'd love to come," he told her and grabbed a couple of glasses for the juice. "What are you going to get and where?" he asked while pouring juice for them.

"An arrow pointing down to my vag with 'insert dick here' written above," she told him with a straight face. "I'm kidding," she added when he looked at her in surprise and actually seemed to believe her.

"Good," he sighed in relief and grabbed a knife and a fork for each.

"I'm getting a couple of measures from David Bowie's song Rebel Rebel on the side of my middle finger," she informed.

"Oh, I love that song," Jesse said and sat down on a stool. "Making a statement, huh?" He watched her sit next to him.

"I just like the song and I've been thinking about getting some notes tattooed." She shrugged.

* * *

Jesse was thoroughly entertained by the process of getting a tattoo.

The final product was neat: The staff, the horizontal lines on a music sheet, were done in pale pink under Beca's wishes, and the notes were tattooed in black.

Even though her skin was irritated, the tattoo looked good and Beca seemed happy with it.

"Quick question," Beca mumbled as she bit into the hot dog she was having for lunch while they walked down a park near the tattoo shop.

"Shoot." Jesse tilted his head to look at her.

"When have you started feeling like an actual adult? 'Cause, like, legally I am an adult but I don't feel like one."

"Around the time I graduated college." He shrugged. "I was lucky enough to find a job right away… Hollie and I moved in together." He paused. "I guess responsibilities make you realize that you have to get your shit together and make enough money to afford rent and food." He paused to swallow. "Oh, and also save money to pay off your student loan!" he added.

"Are you still in debt?" Beca wondered.

"No," he shook his head. "I paid it off. I'm actually saving up to buy a house now."

"Wow, that's very adult!"

"I can't live in rent forever. Gotta invest in a propriety."

"Well, when do you think you'll buy a house?" she asked.

"I have been dabbling a little in the stock market and I've made some good money," he casually mentioned. "But I don't want to make an offer unless I can afford the house I'm going to buy."

"You don't want to be in debt." She nodded to herself.

"Correct," he mumbled through a mouthful of hot dog. "I actually can afford a decent home but I can't just put all I have into a house and live off my paycheck."

"You could do more than a little dabbling into the stock market," she suggested.

"I'm not a big fan of the stock market as a whole. It actually stresses me out and I can do with lesser stress in my life."

"Well, then use the other degree you have. You have a degree in film scoring, right?"

He chuckled humorlessly. "I can't."

"Why? What's stopping you?" She frowned.

"It's too late." He shrugged.

"It is never too late," she disagreed.

"The odds of failing are high so why take a risk?"

"Because it's what drives you. Because you love music and film." He'd tear her ears off by talking about music in films trying to get her to see a movie, anyone one can tell how passionate he was about film production and music composition. "It's worth the risk."

He tilted his head and looked at her adoringly. "I really love your passion and determination, please don't lose these traits. Thrive on them and achieve what you want."

"Why are you talking like you're on your death bed?" she questioned in confusion.

"Beca, a job in the entertainment industry requires a thick skin and a certain naivety that would keep you going and I don't have those things... I did back when I was around your age."

"Naivety?" Yep, she was offended.

He nodded. "Confidence, if you will," he added then sat on a bench to tie his loose shoelaces after he stuffed his hot dog in his mouth.

"Well, what kept you from following a path in music when you were my age?" she questioned. "Did you naivety vanish? I mean, it can't be the confidence because you're annoyingly confident," she deadpanned.

He smiled a little at the tone she was using and leaned against the bench before removing the hot dog from his mouth once he took a bite.

"That is such a back handed compliment." He paused to swallow the food he barely chewed. "I actually postponed the music thing then kind of just gave it up. I had a job and a life in Atlanta." He sighed.

"You gave up your dream for her, didn't you?" she figured.

"She wasn't the same after we lost the baby… It actually got to the point where I dragged her to a therapist's office. I couldn't just pack and head to L.A. to become a composer and leave her behind. I really doubted we'd make it through the distance and as I said she wasn't feeling well. I couldn't put her through leaving her life in Atlanta for me either."

"You put her first." She sat down next to him.

"I put her first," he nodded. "Aren't you gonna ask if I regret it?" he wondered, tilting his head to look at her as he finished his hot dog.

"No, I don't wanna hear it," she answered. "You'd probably drop some bullshit that I assume is what you tell yourself to keep it together and not, like, pick up the phone and give the woman who picked over your dream a piece of your mind."

"I'm really glad you showed up last night when you did because I was itching to make that call," he confessed, confirming what she had guessed.

"You shouldn't keep it to yourself, it's not healthy because you will combust at some point and trust me, pal, it's really bad when that happens," she told him and watched him frown as he tilted his head to look at her.

"You're saying I should call my ex- and blame her for how things turned out?" he asked in confusion.

"No, of course not," she retorted. "I'm saying you should let out. Say it out loud. You're into dramatics, go up to the mountains and yell it on top of your lungs," she suggested. "Or just pretend I'm her and tell me what you wanted to say to her but never did."

"Well, I was gonna start off by congratulating her on the engagement," he said as he scratched his chin.

"Great, now use direct speech and look at me?" she was biting into her hot dog as she spoke then watched him turn around and eye her.

"I know I'm not a tall drink of water like your ex- but I doubt it's hard to pretend," she told him after swallowing the hot dog. "Don't hold back." He seemed a little hesitant so she figured he'd need a little push.

"Fuck you," he blurted and she was taken aback a little because of abrupt it was.

"I don't even care about the reason you fucked Charlie in our bed. It doesn't make things easier. I don't wake up every day feeling okay because _'it wasn't my fault that you fell for my best friend'_. If you gave two shits about me you would have told me about your feelings. I would have stepped back and moved along with my life because I wasn't even in love with you anymore… I just didn't want to end what I thought was a good thing. I thought we were at a stage where it's more about mutual respect and understanding of each other because we've been together for so long, which was obviously wrong and just me trying to convince myself that there was still something for us. That I didn't waste almost a decade of my life with you. That I'm not stuck doing a job I dread going to every day for no good reason. That I never even tried to follow my dream since I was a kid for no good reason." He sniffled, pausing because he was going to tear up. "Excuse me," he cleared his throat and got up, pacing away and leaving Beca alone on the bench.

Part of her wanted to go after him but she didn't. He wanted to be alone and she wasn't the pushy type. However, she did plan to text him if he didn't come back or at least contacted her in an hour.

* * *

She was playing Temple Run when he came back. She looked up and eyed him. Asking if he was okay seemed stupid so she just rubbed his arm. "You'll get through this," she assured him, patting his forearm.

He shifted in discomfort, not because of her gesture but because of he was a little embarrassed for almost breaking down, and continued to look ahead of him.

"It was a pretty bad idea what I told you to do," she apologetically said, crossing her arms across her chest and leaning against the bench. "I didn't think it'll make you hurt. I thought it would do the opposite... Sorry."

"No, it's fine. It's good that I got those words out. Made me realize certain things." He blew a breath. "I think I'm having an existential crisis." He let out a small humorless chuckle.

"If there were any therapists working on weekends I would have dragged you to their office." This time he laughed and it made her feel accomplished because she had no idea how to give him advice so cracking jokes was her only option. "I checked movies playing in theaters, there's a new Die Hard movie, wanna go see it?" she asked. Yes, she was ready to sit through a movie if it meant he'd feel slightly better.

"I heard it's the worst in the Die Hard franchise," he told her.

"You've already seen it haven't you?" she guessed.

"Opening night." He nodded.

"Well, is there a movie you wanna go see?" she questioned.

"The new Nicholas Sparks movie," he said fully expecting her to flat out refuse.

She sucked in a breath. "Okay," she agreed. "If I fall asleep do not dare wake me up, though," she warned when he looked at her in surprise.

"You really would go see a Nicholas Sparks movie with me?"

"Yeah." She shrugged.

She'd totally sit through a boring melodramatic romantic movie if it meant he'd feel slightly better.

* * *

They got their tickets and snacks and sat the empty theaters which Beca knew wasn't a good sign and braced herself for the crap she paid to watch on the big screen.

She rolled her eyes way too many times throughout the runtime of the movie. "Oh, C'mon," she exclaimed and got shushed by one of the few movie goers watching the movie with them. "Are they fucking serious? Who wrote this crap?" she whispered, tilting her head to look at Jesse.

"What's so bad about getting caught in a rainstorm?" he asked, amused by her annoyance—going to see a cheesy romantic movie with movie hater was weirdly therapeutic.

"It's such a cliché," she mumbled. "And for fucks' sake, why is her face dry now? Her face looks too perfect for someone who just got caught in a rainstorm."

Jesse shrugged in response and held the popcorn her way.

"Whoever wrote this must've drawn some inspiration from M Night Shyamalan," Beca said once the credit began to roll. "Because what _amazing_ twists did this movie have! So fucking stupid. The lady that only Katie sees is a ghost. No one fucking saw that coming," she grumbled.

"You know M Night?" Jesse said in surprise.

"I'm not even going to address the cop subplot because _that_ was just absurd," she continued with her rant.

"You're taking this way too seriously," Jesse chuckled. "It's a sappy Nicholas Sparks movie, what did you expect?"

"Oh, so you knew it's bad." She narrowed her eyes.

"I knew what I was in for; unrealistic cheesy epic romance. But I agree the plot twists were pretty dumb."

"Thank you." She stood up.

* * *

Beca woke up first the next day. Jesse was spooning her and had his chin on her shoulder, peaceful sleeping, which felt awfully wrong but she chose to ignore that feeling.

She kind of regretted inviting him to her room when he tried to kiss her after walking her back to her dorm. It seemed like a good idea at the time: Kimmy Jin was away for the weekend: she had the room to herself and their RA was either too cool or just didn't care.

If she was being honest with herself, she invited him back to her room because she couldn't stand the awkwardness that followed his attempt at kissing her—PDA wasn't something fuck buddies did.

She decided that it was just a mishap, pinned it on his vulnerability and state of mind in general because it couldn't possibly be anything other than that.

She looked at her newly tattooed finger and swore under her breath, realizing that the bandage was still on and she hadn't wash it: she hoped it didn't get infected because of her forgetfulness.

"Jesse," she called while patting his cheek. "Jesse, wake up."

"Morning," he said as he distanced himself a little to let her get up. "What's wrong?" he asked, hearing her wince.

"It's nothing," she told him. "I just removed the bandage from around my finger." She eyed her sore finger that needed to be cleaned as soon as possible.

"Didn't the tattoo artist tell you to soak it with warm water?" He sat up. "To keep it from sticking to your skin." He rubbed his face. "Let me see," he requested. "This looks bad," he said when she did let him see her hand.

"Looks worse than it feels. It's just blood and ink," she assured and pulled her hand away before she climbed out of bed.

He laid back on the bed and eyed the shelf full of vinyl records in her side of the room while she put some clothes on.

"I don't know when my roommate will be back," she said as she gathered his clothes from the floor then tossed them on the bed.

He nodded and began getting dressed.

"You need to wash that tattoo of yours," he was slipping his pants on as he spoke. "Before it gets infected."

"I know." She looked down at middle finger then looked up at the knock on the door.

"Beca, wake up." They heard Dr. Mitchell say.

Jesse tried to keep the horror from his face when he met Beca's gaze.

"Beca," Dr. Mitchell called and knocked again.

Jesse held his breath when Beca turned on her heels.

"Hi, Dad," she greeted after she unlocked the door.

"Hey, kiddo. You didn't come back," he said in disappointment.

"Yeah, that friend I told you needed help really needed me around," she told him while blocking his view by pulling the door.

"Well, I tried calling you last night. I got worried and figured I'd come check here before starting a search party," he jokingly said.

"I was busy." She cleared her throat, thinking back at what she was doing when he called.

She then momentarily closed her eyes when she heard Jesse swear after he dropped something.

Dr. Mitchell arched an eyebrow at his only daughter who sighed then pushed the door open so he'd see who was inside the room.

"Morning, Professor," Jesse greeted awkwardly as he picked up his cell phone from the floor while suppressing the pain that stubbing his toe against the bed caused.

"Yes, Dad, this is exactly what it looks like," Beca confirmed when her father looked back at her.

Jesse who would very much prefer getting swallowed by the floor any moment now was surprised that his former professor wasn't trying to strangle him like he imagined he would.


	6. Chapter 6

"Looking up porn?" Jesse asked as he walked into the living area, fresh out of the shower, to find Beca using his laptop as she sat Indian style on his couch.

"Looking up jobs," she answered. "I figured I can drop out now and get a job waiting tables or something. Save some money before I move to L.A." Beca paused to chug what was left in the red wine bottle she was holding. "Then I thought why drop out when I can just skip classes and get a job. This way I can save even more money instead of putting some of it into rent because I'd be staying in my dorm room."

Jesse sighed and picked Thororea from the floor before he sat down next to Beca who was getting drunker by the minute.

He didn't ask questions when she asked if he could get her a beer pack. She didn't sound like her usual apathetic self and that was worrisome so he told her to meet him at his place because he was still at work when she called.

She didn't start talking about what's pissing her off until the alcohol buzz kicked in and from all the rambling he understood that she got in a fight with the Bellas because she improvised during their set which according to her wasn't why they were disqualified but the captain blamed her which led to a fight that resulted in Beca quitting which meant that her father would no longer help move to L.A. which also meant the end of the world to her, apparently.

"This is interesting." He heard her say as he rubbed Thororeo's belly and grabbed the remote control.

"What's that?" Jesse asked.

"Says here that camgirls can make up to like a thousand bucks a week," she told him and brought the beer can she had popped open to her mouth. "I guess I can give a show for a thousand dollars." She shrugged.

"Okay, I think you've had enough to drink for the night," he decided and reached over and took the car from her hand then put it away before he took the laptop from her. "I mean no disrespect to people who do that sort of thing but you're not _that_ desperate."

"I actually am," she disagreed and tried to take the laptop from him.

He laughed. "Oh, Becs," he sighed, pulling her into a hug. He felt her relax as he rubbed her back. "You could always finish school. Get a degree that could come in handy." He shrugged.

"No." She pulled away and leaned against the couch when Thororeo hopped on her lap. "I don't want _a backup career_." She shook her head. "I don't wanna end up like you, miserable as fuck."

"Well, that's a little harsh but you're drunk so I won't hold it against you."

"Sorry," she apologized while running a hand through her hair.

"You should probably talk to your father about quitting the Bellas and why you quit. I'm sure he'll understand," he advised.

She snorted in response. "Dad will most likely lecture me about how I never take anything seriously." She rubbed her face before she held the kitten up.

"No, he wouldn't. You're overacting. There's an emotional excess up here." He poked her head. "That you're having trouble managing."

"Are you really therapizing me right now?" she questioned in disbelief.

"I've been hanging out at my therapist's office a lot." He scratched his head in embarrassment.

"Yeah, well that doesn't make you eligible for therapizing me so don't."

"I'm just trying to be a good friend here." He held his hands up. "I mean he didn't even call in the RA the other day," he said, refereeing the day Dr. Mitchell came to Beca's room and she didn't try to hide the fact that Jesse spent the night in her dorm room.

She chuckled a little to herself, thinking back at how frightened Jesse was that day, as she reached and grabbed another beer can, popping it open and bringing it to her mouth.

He took a sip from the beer he took from her minutes ago, arching an eyebrow, watching the way she chugged down the beer.

"You really need to slow down," he advised.

"I'm nineteen, I can go drinking all night and wake up the next day ready to go for a run," she told him, pausing to burp. "Not that I would willingly go for a run after a night of drinking… or ever." She placed the now empty can on the coffee table.

"Thororeo, buddy, you need to go now." She placed a peck on the kitten's head. "Daddy and Mommy are gonna do stuff your cute young ass shouldn't see." She put the kitten on the floor and Jesse had to fight off the grin from forming on his face because of the childish voice she used while talking to Thororeo and the fact that she referred to him as Daddy and to herself as Mommy—she wouldn't do it sober in a million years.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked once she looked at him and found him staring adoring at her.

He shrugged in response and watched her climb on his lap. She kissed him forcefully, cupping his face.

"Hey, Bec," Jesse breathlessly said when she pulled away and helped him take off his t-shirt.

She hummed in response, pressing her lips against his pulling him yet again in a deep passionate kiss.

He held her waist, afraid she'd slip given the fact that she was pretty drunk, and matched her kisses with equally lustful ones, groaning when she dug her nails into his scalp.

"What did you tell your dad?" he mumbled, tilting his head to give her better access to his neck once she broke the kiss.

"Does it matter?" she mumbled back.

"Yeah, 'cause I ran into him and he was pretty stoic. Did you tell him we're dating?" He found it hard to believe that Dr. Mitchell would be cool with his nineteen-year-old daughter's beneficial relationship with a soon-to-be thirty-year-old former student of his.

"Why would I do that?" she scoffed, pulling away from his neck and meeting his gaze.

"So your father is okay with you being in friends with benefits relationship?" he said in disbelief, assuming she told her father the truth. "With someone who's a decade older than you?" He tucked the hair that fell on her face behind her ear.

"Dad can't exactly say shit to me for being involved with you."

"Why?" he questioned.

She blew a breath and looked away from him for a second. "I was the result of a summer fling between a thirty-four-year old and a twenty-year-old, that's why. Dad just told me to be careful and not repeat his and mom's _mistake_."

Jesse hoped she was paraphrasing and that her father didn't actually call her a mistake because that was just fucked up.

"Can we get going or do you have other questions?" she asked.

He eyed her for a few seconds then leaned up and pressed his mouth against hers, grinning when she giggled the moment he very abruptly wrapped her in his arms and laid her on the couch.

* * *

"Jesse, did you forget to feed him?" she asked, tilting her head to look at the kitten hearing it meow.

"No, he just wants your attention, Becs," Jesse answered with a shrug and hopped on the couch after he got rid of the condom they used. "He loves you."

"You don't give him enough attention so he comes to me 'cause I'm the only other option he has." She picked the kitten up and put him against her chest as she leaned against the couch. "Shame on you for not giving your pet his much deserved attention," she mumbled, nuzzling the kitten, then scratched Thororeo's chin while resting her feet on the coffee table.

"You haven't put your clothes back on which means you don't plan to leave yet but you're wearing your underwear which means you're up for another round just not now," he noted as he eyed her.

"I thought we'd grab a bite, Sherlock," she told him.

"I'll make us something," he offered then pushed himself up getting ready to stand up.

"Already ordered pizza," she informed. "Should get here in thirty minutes tops." She stifled a yawn then took a lock of her hair between her fingers twirling it.

"Oh, okay." He got up anyway.

"Dude, you have a really nice ass," she complimented, watching him collect the empty beer cans.

"Really?" he said in surprise. "No one ever complimented me on my ass before. Thanks," he thanked her over his shoulder as he made his way to the kitchen.

"What even makes a man's ass nice?" he wondered, walking back with a bottle of water and a glass.

"It's _there_. And, like tight. I don't know." She shrugged. "Feels great when I grab it."

"Feels greater to be grabbed by you." He winked to which she rolled her eyes. "You had a lot to drink, you need to hydrate." He filled a glass of water and held her towards her. She sighed and took it from him.

"Hey, why don't you ask your mom to help you move to L.A?" Jesse wondered as he sat down.

She shook her head, still drinking the water.

"Mind if I ask why?" he wondered.

"Mom is more of an acquaintance." She held Thororeo with one hand and placed it on her lap and placed the empty glass on the coffee table. "You don't go to acquaintances for money."

"Wanna talk about her?" he offered to listen. "Promise I won't therapize you."

"There isn't much to talk about." She shrugged, scratching the kitten's chin before she let it get off the couch. "She's a good person, just not _that_ good at being a parent."

He could hear the sadness in her voice despite the very convincing deadpan tone she was faking. "C'mere." He reached out and pulled her into a hug.

"I'm fine," she mumbled into his chest and he had a feeling she was saying it to herself but he replied anyway, "I know you are." He tightened his hug, enjoying the feel of her warm body against his chest.

"How about a movie?" he wondered, loosening his hold.

"No," she groaned and pulled away.

"They added really cool movies on Netflix this month, Bec." He already going through the Netflix library thoughtfully. "Oh, Carrie is on here. Have you seen it?"

"Nope," she sighed. "I don't watch movies that came out before I was born," she added after glancing at the TV screen and seeing that the movie came out in 1976. "I wouldn't watch _any_ movies if I had a say in the matter," she continued

"If you're gonna complain the whole time then fine no movie." He turned the TV off.

"I won't complain the whole time." She reached for the remote and turned the TV back on. "I'll fall asleep before it's over," she mumbled, starting the movie.

* * *

"Why are you intensely looking at your phone?" Beca asked both curious and slightly worried when Jesse grabbed his phone after it chimed with a text and stared at it for like five minutes.

"Chloe set me up on a blind date," he informed.

"That's your sister in law, right?" Beca checked.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"Well, it could be fun." She shrugged. "Wanna stalk her online?" she suggested.

He gave her his phone, paused the movie, and got up hearing the doorbell. "That's probably our dinner. Scroll up my conversation with Chlo for details on my blind date."

He quickly wore his sweatpants and t-shirt then grabbed his wallet.

When he came back, holding a couple of pizza boxes, Beca was still on his cellphone.

"Her Facebook feed isn't obnoxious," she informed. "And she's pretty cute."

"I have nothing to talk to her about."

"She's a vet, you can talk about your cat. Her last name is Fleischmann, Jewish. You're Jewish, you could talk about Hebrew school… or summer camp, I'm sure you both went to summer camp, it's like a Jewish tradition."

"I have been to summer camp," he confirmed. "You really think I should do this, huh?" he noted, taking a seat on the couch.

She shrugged. "No one is asking you to get into a relationship. Just, like, have some human interaction with someone that isn't me, your fuckbuddy, or Dr. Hatfield, your therapist."

He inhaled deeply then nodded. "Okay, I'll do it. And, please, stop calling yourself _that_."

"Why shouldn't I? I am your fuckbuddy, you're my fuckbuddy, and we're fuckbuddies." She stuffed her mouth with pizza.

"I don't like it. We're friends who have sex without any commitment."

"Fuckbuddies." She shrugged.

"But it's vulgar. Friends with benefits sounds better." She rolled her eyes at his words as he reached for the remote control and resumed playing the movie.

They got into a comfortable as they dined and watched Carrie until Jesse broke it. "Hey, do you have anything next weekend?" he wondered, finishing up his last slice.

"No," she answered. "Why?"

"Would you like to come to my birthday party?" he wondered.

She stopped chewing and looked at him. "Well, mine and Adam's. Chloe planned it so it's gonna be good. And, being away from Barden might help you decide what you wanna do since you quit the Bellas." He reached and took a slice from the pizza box on her lap.

"Would it be cool, though, with your friends and family if you brought me?"

He shrugged. "Why wouldn't it?"

"Because of our thing?"

"Oh, I haven't told anyone about _our thing_."

"You haven't bragged about banging a nineteen-year to your brother?" she questioned in mock-shock.

"Haven't been talking to him that much. Can't speak to him for a minute without getting asked if ' _I'm okay_ '."

"At least you have siblings you could talk to… Isn't weird that my parents never had kids?"

He frowned at her phrasing. "They have _you_."

"I meant kids they planned on having," she explained.

"I don't know." He shrugged. "A lot of people choose not to have kids."

"I won't," she told him. "As soon as I can afford it I'm gonna get my tubes tied."

"That's drastic."

"Yeah, not gonna risk bringing a human into the world only to be around for a few years before I send 'em to live with their dad who would also get rid of them and ship them to live with his mom," she deadpanned before busing herself with the slice she had in her hand.

"Is that what happened to you?" he carefully asked.

There was a minute of silence before she spoke.

"Mom had plans that didn't involve a kid so she sent me to Dad. Lived with him for like a year before he talked me into moving with my grandma 'cause grandpa had just passed away and she wouldn't feel lonely if I moved in with her. I'm pretty sure he just wanted to get rid of me because he had just started seeing the step-monster and she wasn't very fond of me."

"How old were when you moved in with your grandmother?" he wondered.

"Six," she answered.

"That's not right," he mumbled. "You're not a freaking football, it's not right to toss you around."

Jesse pretty much lost all respect he had for his former professor for the way he treated his daughter.

"It's fine."

"Why? Because you weren't planned? That's not an excuse to treat you like a burden."

"No, 'cause, unlike my neglectful parents, grandma wanted me. I'm glad Dad sent me to live with her."

Despite the shit they put through, that clearly affected her, Beca recognized the positive and held on to it, and Jesse admired her for it.

"Where are you throwing the birthday party, Atlanta?" she asked changing the subject.

He shook his head. "Jacksonville."

"Thought your brother lives here in Georgia," Beca shared, frowning a little because she was quite sure Adam lived in Atlanta.

"Yes, Adam lives in Atlanta. Our parents own a farm in Jacksonville, near the beach. They moved there once they retired to get away from the city and like spend their days planting veggies and fruits. But they're away on a year-long cruise ship so the place is empty."

"Damn." She paused to swallow the pizza she was chewing. "Your parents are really enjoying their retirement."

"The cruise was Sarah's idea. We liked it and decided together to send them on it. It's pretty expensive but they deserve it."

"I'm sure they do."

He devoured a slice in one breath then washed it down with water. "Bring a bathing suit, might go in for a swim while we're there," he suggested then realized she hadn't accepted his invitation yet. "If the weather allows and you decide to come, of course."

"Good thinking," she mumbled, biting into the slice she was holding. "I ordered two large pizzas for a reason, you know," she told him when he reached and grabbed another slice.

She ordered two because sharing a pizza wasn't an option since: he had a really bad habit of forgetting to eat properly during the day and lived off energy bars which made dinner the only time he'd actually eat something.

"Yeah, I know." He nodded. "But you eat like a bird and wouldn't finish it anyway."

"Well, this bird hates sharing so fuck off, pizza thief!" She scooted away from him to keep the box on her lap away from his reach.

He audibly laughed then leaned against the couch, shifting his attention to the TV to watch the movie that was playing.

* * *

 _A few days later._

"Sorry, I kept you waiting," Beca apologized as she slipped into the booth facing Benji.

"It's okay. Besides, I could be spending the evening in my dorm room." He shrugged, smiling at her while she shrugged off her back bag. "Not that I mind but with everyone away for break it's spooky." He grimaced.

"I actually like it better when it's empty. At least, I can sleep in peace." She placed her back bag aside then tucked her hair behind her ear.

The walls were seriously too thin at their dorm because it wasn't just thumping she could hear.

"Ordered yet?" she wondered, grabbing the menu.

He shook his head and grabbed the other menu on the table.

They called the waitress once they decided on their order and let her know.

The waitress was walking away when Benji spoke, "So, I lost my plane ticket and am stuck here until I get on a bus home tomorrow, but why are you spending spring break in Barden?"

"I decided to save up the money I was going to purchase a plane ticket with," she sighed. "And I get carsick, so no way I can withstand a bus ride." Beca rested her arms on the table and crossed them.

She drummed her finger on the wooden table and was about to ask Benji if he learned any new magic tricks to keep the conversation going when he received a facetime call.

He looked at Beca and mumbled, "Mom," before he picked up.

"Hi, mom," he greeted after tapping on the answer button.

 _"Benny,"_ his mother's voice came in mere seconds later. " _Where are you, at a diner?"_

"Yeah," he shyly nodded. "I'm with a friend actually," he told her then tilted his phone towards Beca so his mother could see her.

"Hey, Mrs. Applebaum," Beca said to the older woman.

"This is Beca, mom, we have some courses together and live in the same building," he introduced.

" _Nice to meet you, Beca,_ " Mrs. Applebaum spoke.

"You, too," Beca smiled back then watched Benji tilted his phone back to his face.

" _What are you doing for your birthday, Benny?"_ At that question, Beca arched an eyebrow at Benji. She didn't know it was his birthday. She ran into him when she was getting out baker hall and heading to the radio station and he was dragging a suitcase into the building.

They spoke for about five minutes: He told her about losing his plane ticket then awkwardly asked her if she wanted to meet up for dinner later to which she agreed while suppressing a laugh at the shade of red he turned into once he began rambling about dinner being platonic that he thought of her a sister.

She didn't mind getting friendzoned by Benji.

"Um, dinner." He shrugged.

 _"Aren't there fun places to go visit in Barden?"_ she wondered and Beca could tell from the mother's tone that she worried about her kid who lacked social skills.

"There's a bowling alley close to campus," Beca chimed in. She knew Benji. He didn't go outside of campus very often and didn't know the town. "You bowl, Benji?" she added when Benji looked at her.

He nodded.

" _Bowling sounds like fun,_ " Mrs. Applebaum beamed. _"Don't forget to take pictures,"_ she told her son. " _Beca, sweetie,_ " she then called.

"Yeah?" Beca answered then smiled when Benji turned the phone so the two could see each other.

 _"Please, take candids of Benny having fun."_

"Sure," Beca nodded at the woman on the screen of the phone.

 _"How long have you known each other?"_ she curiously asked. _"Benny didn't tell me he had a friend who is also a girl."_

Beca glanced at Benji and she could tell he was embarrassed. She hoped the look she gave him assured him that she didn't mind his mom. She actually liked his mother… the woman was invested in her kid's life, what's not to like about her?

"We met early September."

They met at Acappella auditions. She didn't want to mention it because Benji didn't make it into the group. She actually awkwardly attempted to comfort him when ran into him the day after hood night.

"Okay, mom, food is here, see you soon, bye," Benji rambled then hung up. "Sorry," he apologized.

Beca shrugged. "So, I'm thinking we hit a night club after we're done bowling," she told him.

"Night club? I've never been to a night club." He placed his cell phone on the table. "Besides we're both under twenty-one, we can't get in."

"We actually can." While she was at the radio station Luke texted her to tell her how sick the mashup on the air was then told her if she'd like to join him at The Garage because his friends wanted to meet the person behind the mash-up. She declined given the fact that she had made plans with Benji.

"It's fine if you don't want to," she told him noting the anxious look on his face. "We can do something else." She shrugged. "It is your birthday, you make the calls."

* * *

On their way to the bowling place, Beca got an idea once they walked past a Best Buy store: document the night with a Polaroid camera.

She actually owned a Polaroid camera, the Best Buy store reminded her of it. They weren't too far from campus so they made a detour and got the camera then headed to the bowling alley.

Reaching the facility, Beca took a candid of Benji as he passionately talked about Starwars. He froze when she did. "So, Darth Vader's redemption is summed in the title," she said while she shook the Polaroid picture.

"Yeah," he nodded slowly and pushed the door open. "Return of the Jedi, it's such a perfect title," he sighed, stepping back to let her in first.

"Totally." She stepped inside and looked at the picture in her hand while they walked towards the desk attendant.

Beca put the picture in her pocket and was about to address the desk attendant and let them know she and Benji wanted to reserve an alley as well as a couple of pairs of shoes when she recognized the ass she had complimented very recently that looked great in the washed out jeans he wore as he bent to tie the laces of his bowling shoes.

It was none other than Jesse Swanson and he wasn't alone. Beca recognized the woman by his side as well. She was looking at her Facebook profile not too long ago.

' _Blind date at a bowling alley. His sister-in-law is weird.'_ Beca thought to herself, knowing who was behind this blind date. She figured they'd go have dinner or grab a coffee.

She smiled when Jesse straightened up and he looked pretty surprised to see her after doing a double take.

"Becs? Hey!" He walked towards her and Benji.

"Hey." She waved with her camera free hand.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, glancing at Benji. It was kind of hard to miss the boy with the sideburns right by her side.

"Same as you." She shrugged. "We're here to strike some pins."

"Rae, this Beca, a _really_ good friend of mine. Bec, this is Rae," he gestured to the woman who flashed Beca a friendly smile.

"Pleasure meeting you, Rae," Beca smiled back curtly. "Well, this is Benji," she introduced Benji.

"Benjamin Applebaum, but you can call me Benji." Benji extended a hand to shake Jesse's.

"Cool T-shirt," Jesse complimented as he shook Benji's hand, spotting the Star Wars themed t-shirt.

"Thank you," Benji let go of his hand and proceeded to wave a hand at Rae who hadn't moved from her spot.

"Well, it was nice running into you," Beca said.

"You, too," Jesse replied, warmly smiling at her as he gave her the once-over. He thought she looked great, he always did. He recognized the t-shirt she was wearing underneath her denim jacket: it was the t-shirt she wore the day they met.

Beca looked down at her t-shirt when he kept eyeing it, thinking that she must've had something on it.

"Nice t-shirt," he smirked to which she rolled her eyes despite the warmth she could feel on her cheeks that the thought of what they did that very day vividly came to her.

"Thanks." Beca soon began walking towards the desk to make a reservation.

* * *

"How do you know her?" Jesse heard Rae ask and he feared he had been staring long at Beca.

"Who, Becs?" he checked. She nodded. "I helped her with her car once and we stayed in touch afterward," he answered and walked over to grab a bowling ball realizing it was his turn.

Beca was enjoying herself. And, he was glad she was. But, deep down he was a little jealous of the amount of fun she was having. She wouldn't agree to a picture with him easily if at all. And, there she was, taking plenty of Polaroid photos with Benji.

She made it clear to him a bunch of times that she didn't want to date for reasons she didn't tell him but he could guess: It was weird to see her on a date.

He shook his head after only striking four pins and knew the reason he was off his game was thinking too much about Beca and her date. He told himself to let it go and focus on his actual date and the game they were playing.

Jesse was going to murder Chloe for setting them up to go bowling.

Exactly a minute after he told himself he was no longer going to think about Beca, he tilted his head to look towards the alley she and Benji reserved hearing her sing the Happy Birthday Song.

A grin made its way to his face because his ears didn't deceive him, Beca was holding a plate that had a slice of cheesecake on it and was actually singing, a little awkwardly, to Benji who had a hat saying Birthday Boy that Jesse assumed they got from the attendant desk and that was clearly meant to be worn by a child.

Jesse itched to go to them yet didn't. He should really get to know the woman he's with better.

He did, however, wish Benji a happy birthday when it was Rae's turn to play.

"Thanks," Benji grinned back then looked in the direction of the camera when Beca held up, going for a selfie.

* * *

 _A couple of hours later._

Benji didn't need alcohol or drugs to have a good time, he just needed to be comfortable. But it was still surprising to see him cut loose and show off his awkward dance moves. Beca let the weirdo flag fly and allowed herself to join in with the birthday boy.

She didn't believe her ears when he told her he'd like to visit a night club. She texted Luke, he told her to meet her at The Garage. She and Benji went there and found the English blond man waiting for them near the bouncer who looked the other way and let them through.

They went to the bar to get some drinks and were waiting for the bartender to acknowledge them when Beca received a text.

Jesse [10:14 pm]: 'Are you still with birthday boy?'

Beca [10:15 pm]: 'Yep. We're at The Garage.'

Beca [10:15 pm]: 'Come. There's an out of order stall we could use.'

Jesse [10:16 pm]: 'No, we won't USE a stall while you're on a date.'

Beca [10:16 pm]: 'Date?'

Jesse [10:16 pm]: 'You're not on a date with Benji?'

Beca [10:17 pm]: 'Nope, dummy. We're out celebrating his birthday.'

Beca [10:17 pm]: 'You coming?'

She might have checked him out every over time he bent while bowling and it might have slightly given her an itch that he could help her with.

Jesse [10:18]: 'Be there in 10 minutes.'

Beca left Benji with one of Luke's friends, who was into the oblivious nerd, after telling him she needed to use the restroom once Jesse texted her that he just got there.

She washed up, feeling gross and sweaty after owning the dance floor with Benji, and did some damage control to her smudged heavy makeup.

Beca was getting rid of the paper towel she used when the door opened and Jesse peeked his head.

He greeted her with a forceful kiss that although surprised her, because it wasn't his 'style', she welcomed and matched before she pulled away, laughing.

He frowned, tucking her hair behind her ear. "What?"

"I just looked at the mirror and we totally look hornier than a long distance couple who haven't seen each other in months." She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

He let out a small chuckle when he saw her point then took her hand and let her lead him to the out of order stall in the restroom.

* * *

They made it work. He knew how her body worked and what to do to get her off fast. It went as good as a quickie in a small stall would go.

"How did you date go?" Beca asked as she ran a hand over her mess of her hair while standing in front of the mirror, trying to look presentable.

"I didn't kiss her after dropping her off to her place, is that bad?" He grimaced, smoothing down his shirt after tucking it into his jeans.

"Asking the wrong person, dude." She got closer to the mirror, yet again, fixing her smudged makeup.

He snorted, remembering that he was talking to a 19-year-old with no actual experience in the dating scene.

"It went well, though, right?" she asked.

"Yeah." He shrugged. "She's cool."

They exited the restroom separately because they didn't want to get kicked out of the night club for boning in the restroom. Jesse left first and went straight to the bar. Beca got out a few minutes later, heading to where Benji was hanging.

"There you are," Benji sighed, spotting Beca and rushing to meet her halfway, looking a little anxious.

"What's up, Benji?" she asked, arching an eyebrow when the very same girl that she left him chatting with walked past them and basically gave Benji 'fuck me eyes' before she headed to the restroom.

Benji was a rambling mess and Beca had to interrupt him. "Okay, calm down." She held his shoulders. "What did she say she wants?" she asked him when he did shut up.

"She said some explicit things I'm not comfortable repeating to you," he replied. "You're like my little sister."

"Okay, first off, you're like six months older than me—"

"What's going on here, guys?" Jesse cautiously asked, reaching the two.

"Would you be comfortable repeating them to, Jesse? He's old and is a dude, he's more of a help than me."

"Comfortable repeating what?" Jesse frowned before taking a sip from his gin and tonic.

Beca rolled her eyes when Benji looked at her. "Fine." She walked away leaving Benji and Jesse alone.

She watched them speak for a while then got into a conversation herself with a guy named Greg while they danced to the track the DJ was playing. He was a little handsy and she had to keep pulling away from his reach until Jesse joined her holding her back bag that had her wallet, keys, denim jacket, and camera, as well as Benji's stuff and that she left with Benji.

She took it from him and wore it.

"Where is he?" she asked. Given the fact that music was too loud, Jesse leaned in to speak to her ear. "The out of order."

"Is he…" she trailed off when he shook his head.

"I talked to him, he's nervous because he doesn't want his first time to be meaningless. Told him that there is other fun stuff they could do without losing his virginity just yet."

"You think she'd agree?"

Jesse nodded. "She actually told him she wants to give him head... among other things."

Beca figured they were the explicit things that Benji didn't want to recount in front of her.

"I'm gonna request a song, I can't dance to this electronic stuff. I'm _too_ old," he said to her ear.

"Okay," she replied.

The handsy dude from minutes ago was behind her, trying to grind against her this time. She considered the whole grinding thing pretty sexual and weird to be done in public so she tried to put some distance, not wanting to make a scene, and he didn't seem to get that she wasn't into it.

She turned around to face him. "Please, don't do that," she shouted over the music. She wasn't pissed enough to completely lash out at him over it so politely asking him to stop seemed like the right thing to do.

Feeling a hand on her shoulder, she tilted her head. Jesse was standing beside her and had a hard look on his face. She felt his hand move and stop at her waist.

"Sorry, man," Greg shouted over the music, assuming from the way Jesse pulled Beca to his side that she was _with him_.

Watching him turn around and leave, Beca felt Jesse loosen his hold and also began to feel angry. "What the hell was that?" she asked.

He frowned, confused by her reaction. "I had it under control, you didn't have to jump in and save the day." She removed herself from his hold and began to walk away from the dance floor altogether.

"Beca, c'mon, I was just trying to help," Jesse said after following her outside of the night club. "I saw how he wouldn't quit. You can't expect me to let you get manhandled like that."

"Manhandled is a little strong for what happened. And I was _handling_ things just fine! Just back off, you're not my boyfriend."

"Okay, next time, I'll wait until you're in real danger before stepping in because I'm just a guy you fuck every other day and not your boyfriend."

He was mad at her for getting mad at him over being a decent human being.

"Because apparently, I'm just that. And, I'm not allowed to feel protective of my friend." He shook his head and started walking towards the parking lot, deciding it was best if he just left before they had a legit fight, and left her standing on the sidewalk.


	7. Chapter 7

"So, you think I overacted?" Beca wondered, pausing to swallow the bit of taco she had been chewing.

"Definitely." Benji nodded, holding the door open and letting Beca get out of the taco bell restaurant first. They had to run to the place because they weren't sure they'd find it open, that's how late it was…or early… they haven't gone to bed yet so it was acceptable to consider it late.

"I would have done the same as him," Benji went on to say as they began walking on the sidewalk heading to campus.

He glanced at Beca and watched her kick a small rock. "I mean I get why you didn't appreciate the gesture."

Benji knew everything— well, not everything, _everything_.

She ended up telling him because he noticed her shit mood and also asked why Jesse came in the first place when he wondered where he went.

She gave him a simple answer that confused him. _'Sex, he came for sex,'_ she had said.

He suggested they left and she agreed because she didn't feel like clubbing anymore but didn't leave for Benji's sake.

"Sorry for cutting the night short and ruining your birthday with my drama," Beca apologized as they got into a comfortable silence while munching on their late night snack.

"Are you kidding?" Benji mumbled through a mouthful of food. "I've had the best time ever tonight. This is the best birthday I've had since my seventh when I went to Disney World." He paused to swallow. "I don't think I've ever made so many memories in one night. And not only that but I have pictures to look at and always remember my twentieth birthday thanks to you." He grinned at her and she found it hard not to smile.

"What kind of film do you use for your camera? We really took a lot of pictures," he thoughtfully added to which she rolled her eyes.

"Consider 'em your birthday present. I would have gotten you an actual one if I had known it was your birthday beforehand."

Benji was the closest thing to a friend she had at BU. He found her satirical remakes hilarious while attending a course together, she enjoyed entertaining him. They sat together whenever they ran into each other at the dining hall. They acknowledged each other when they run into each other on campus, generally. He sent her his notes when she wouldn't attend, which was very frequent, and she found it endearing that he did.

* * *

Instead of heading to campus, they stopped at a playground on the way.

"What is it?" Beca wondered when Benji was about to ask her something then stopped.

He was fumbling with her camera in his hands. "Why did Jesse come see you tonight?" Benji asked, tilting his head to look at Beca as they sat on swings, exhaustion catching up with them.

"I told you." She frowned. She thought she covered her relationship with Jesse well.

"Yeah, I get that." He paused. "But he went on a date tonight. Isn't a little weird that he'd come, you know, looking for you." Even in the dimness, Beca could tell he was blushing.

"I asked him to come." Yeah, why did she ask him to come? Sure, she was a little horny but she could have waited until the next day, he wasn't going anywhere. She decided not to think about it.

"I can never do it the friends with benefits thing," he humorlessly chuckled and held the camera close his face, looking for something to snap a photo of.

"'Cause it's all meaningless sex?" she guessed as she began swinging back and forth, her feet never leaving the ground, then closed her eyes, enjoying the breeze.

She didn't get an answer so she took his silence as a yes.

* * *

When they arrived at their dorm it wasn't exactly dark anymore but it wasn't daytime either.

Benji had a bus to catch at 9:00 from Atlanta, GA. to his hometown in Missouri and he had a few hours to go. He decided to have a quick shower then catch the first bus to Atlanta.

Beca had different plans, hers were basically going to bed and waking up in the evening only because she had a shift at the radio station.

While Benji got the door to his dorm room, Beca looked inside her back bag for the photos they took throughout the night and gave them to him. She wished him a safe trip and headed up to her room on the next floor, falling face first on her bed, not caring to remove her makeup or clothes.

* * *

Beca groaned when she heard her phone ringing. She ignored it then sighed and picked up when the person calling her wouldn't quit calling.

"Hello," she sleepily mumbled, eyes still closed.

 _"Hey, Bec, sorry for waking you up,"_ Benji's nervous voice came through.

She frowned. "What's wrong, Benji?" she asked.

" _I can't find my bus ticket, do you mind checking if I dropped it from my wallet by accident in your back bag._ " When they went to the nightclub he kept his belongings in her back bag because it was safer.

"Sure." She then sat up and grabbed her back bag from the floor, tossing her phone on the bed to look inside the back bag.

"Yep, it's here," she sighed, finding the ticket he booked.

" _Oh, thank god._ " She heard him say and rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

"Did you get to the bus station?" she asked him after pulling the phone away from her ear to see that it was still early and that there was enough time to get to Atlanta and give him bus ticket before his bus left.

" _Yes,_ " his answer came quick.

"Okay, well, sit tight and don't worry, I'll be there before your bus leaves."

She hung up, yawning then got out of bed, cursing. She wasn't mad that she was going to travel to Atlanta when she'd much rather be sleeping because poor Benji had already lost his plane ticket home and he's not going to spend another day of his break away from home.

She grabbed her sunglasses, it was too bright and she didn't have time to grab a wipe to remove the smudged makeup from her face, and a cap, her hair wasn't something she wanted to deal with at the moment, and headed out, pacing towards the bus stop, deciding to take the bus to Atlanta instead of going to her father and borrowing his car because last time they spoke they had a little argument and she wanted to avoid him for some time.

She almost missed it when she heard her name being called and only tilted her head when she heard it again to see Jesse run towards her clearly out for his morning run.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "You're in last night's clothes and you're walking really fast, are you in trouble?" he was asking as he continued to jog towards her. "Is everything okay?"

"Benji dropped his bus ticket in my back bag and I have to get to him before his bus leaves at nine from Atlanta. I need to hurry if I wanna catch the next bus to Atlanta," she explained as he came to stop in front of her.

He was panting and she wondered how fast he ran to get to her.

"I can lend you my car if you want," he offered, using his forearm to wipe the sweat forming on his forehead.

"That would be awesome," she gratefully accepted.

They walked to his apartment in a very uncomfortable silence and she knew it was her fault.

"Hey, sorry about last night. I didn't mean to lash out like that," she attempted to apologize as he unlocked the door to his apartment.

"Don't worry about it," he replied. His tone was different, he didn't sound as warm or genuine as he did when he was making sure she was okay.

"I'm having a weird déjà vu," Beca mumbled as he let her into his place.

Hearing her, he chuckled.

When they met, he was out for a jog and had taken her back to his place so she could use the bathroom, she was wearing the very same t-shirt she wore that day.

"Thanks," she said when he held his car keys her way in the palm of his hands, taking a few seconds longer than she should have to take them from him because she was a little distracted her. How could anyone be so attractive when they're so sweaty?

If it weren't for the fact that she had to go, she would have jumped his bones.

* * *

When she got to Barden a few hours later, she texted Jesse and he texted her back his firm's address and told her to leave his keys at the reception desk. And that was the last they had spoken.

Through the months they had known each other, they had gotten a lot more communicative and texted almost daily nowadays. Not receiving his frequent lame jokes kind of sucked even if it was for a couple of days.

Beca tried texting him a few times but it was obvious that he didn't want to talk to her because of how long it took him to answer to her texts. He was clearly ignoring her and she had enough pride to do the same.

She eventually swallowed her pride and went over to his place.

He opened the door on the second knock and seemed surprised to see her at his doorstep.

"Beca, hey," he greeted softly.

"Sorry for showing up without texting first," she apologized.

He shrugged and stepped back to let her in.

She extended the package she was holding in her hand towards him. "Here, I just came to give you this and wish you a happy birthday in advance. So, happy birthday."

He took the present and weighted the carefully paper wrapped. "Thanks. Can I open it now or do I have to wait until my birthday?"

"It's yours, do what you want, dude," she mumbled, taking a step backward.

"Well, it doesn't weigh much," he was saying as he stepped inside his apartment, leaving the door open and expecting her to follow him in.

She blew a breath and did follow him inside the apartment. "I'll open it on my birthday," he told her and pulled her into his embrace, hugging her.

It was really weird how good it felt to be hugged by him. She decided that the feeling his embrace brought was relief, he wouldn't be hugging her if he was mad.

"What?" Jesse asked when he noticed her anxiety as he loosened his hold and watched her step back.

"I didn't text before coming over because you wouldn't reply if I did and if you do it would be by tomorrow probably."

He scratched his head. "Yeah, sorry about that. I've been really busy." He frowned when she snorted. "I _have_ ," he insisted.

"Dude, you're mad I get it. I'm sorry for yelling at you the other night. I overreacted, I'm not used to people looking out for me."

"I'm not mad," he told her. "Really, I'm not," he added, seeing that she didn't seem to believe him. "I was but I'm not anymore. I don't hold grudges, it's not how I roll. Besides, you've already apologized."

What she said kind of hurt but he also had to admit that he did overact a little, too. He was jealous, he didn't realize it then but when he had some time to himself he did. Seeing how Beca behaved around Benji made him jealous of the younger man and made him question what he had with Beca.

Her friendship with Benji made him question their friendship.

"I'm sorry for taking forever to text back, I have a lot of work to finish up so I could enjoy the weekend and not worry about the work I have waiting for me. I hardly have time for anything."

' _Hang on.'_

Was giving him his present in advance her way of letting him know she wasn't going to his birthday over the weekend?

"Hey, does this mean you're not going to my birthday?" he asked, shaking the package.

"Didn't think I'm still welcome." She thought he was mad at her for yelling at him and that she was no longer invited.

"Of course, you're welcome." He stepped closer so she was within reach then rubbed her arm before pulling her into another hug, tighter because she was hugging him back this time around.

He loosened his hold when she pressed the palm of her hand against his chest wanting to break the hug. "You're not just a guy I fuck every other day," she mumbled, playing with the buttons of his shirt. "We're friends, dude." She looked up then leaned in when he lowered his head. "Um, wait, no, I can't," she said, pulling away just as they were about to kiss.

He frowned and was about to ask why but she spoke before he could. "I'm on my period," she told him, putting someplace between them and crossing her arms. "Got it this morning."

"I have chocolate if you want," he was saying as he stepped back as well, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his pants.

"No, I'm good," she replied, pulling her phone from her pocket when it vibrated then shoving it back in her pocket after she checked the caller ID.

"That looks like a lot of work, do you need help with it?" she asked, gesturing at the scattered papers on the coffee table.

He tilted his head to look where she gestured. "I'm sure you have better things to do." He could actually use her help, he was quite impressed with fast she seemed to pick up things so he knew it wouldn't take long before she got the hang of things, but it didn't mean he was going to take her up on her offer.

"Other than my shift at the radio station, nothing," she answered. "And that's not until ten. I'm free until then."

He glanced at the time, it was 6:50 pm. "Well, thank you for offering but I got it." He smiled at her. "I'd appreciate your company, though."

* * *

Jesse let her help him out eventually after she pointed out how much time he'd save if she at least started on the spreadsheet he had to fill then analyze.

He tried to argue at first saying that she didn't have MS Office on her laptop and that he needed his and she countered reminding him that Google Drive offered a decent spreadsheet feature online.

"All right, I'm done. Do I email it to you or do you have a flash drive?" Beca asked as she rotated her neck having finished filling out a spreadsheet.

Beca looked up when she didn't receive an answer and found Jesse asleep.

He was softly snoring, his laptop was on his lap and his head tilted and resting against the couch.

She wondered how long ago he fell asleep then placed her laptop along with the sheets she copied data from on the coffee table before she took his laptop from his lap and put it next to her laptop.

"Jesse," she called and shook him gently. He swallowed waking up then ran a hand through his hair before rubbing his face.

"I need more coffee." She heard him mumble as he sat up.

"Or you could take a quick power nap," Beca suggested.

"If I go to bed now, I won't wake up until tomorrow." He got up and started making his way to the kitchenette.

"Anything else I could do to help?" she wondered when he came back holding a mug of coffee.

"You're done?" he questioned in surprise. She nodded. "Wow, for how long was I out?" he continued. He gave ten pages worth of data, it should have taken her a couple of hours at least.

"I don't know," she replied.

"Well, thanks, Bec, you saved me a lot of time." He took a sip and placed the mug on the coffee table then sat down while unbuttoning his shirt and rotating his sore neck.

"Take it off." He heard Beca say and glanced at her to see her get on her knees while cracking her knuckles. He obliged because a neck rub would be perfect.

"You know what? Take this off, too," she told him while tugging at the white t-shirt he was wearing underneath the shirt.

"Do they pay enough to afford massages to fix what sitting at a desk all day does to your back?" Her question made him chuckle.

"Is this your way of telling me you're gonna start charging me?" he asked and closed his eyes, enjoying the bliss her hands brought.

"Maybe."

"I did show you how to massage so I think I'm entitled to a discount and or a percentage of whatever you make from giving back rubs," he joked.

"Do you give money to your college professors for teaching you the stuff that got a job?" she countered.

"Students who aren't fortunate enough to get free rides have to pay their tuition fees." He tilted his head to look at her and grinned seeing her roll her eyes. She intentionally hurt him to get the smug grin off his face and he couldn't help but laugh afterward.

The noises he'd always make when she'd give him a massage were a turn on and it was a little frustrating knowing she would get any because mother nature decided to reminder today that she dodged a bullet. What frustrated her more was the fact that Jesse knew the effects of his doing yet wasn't holding back.

"God," Jesse exhaled as he sat up. "If music doesn't work out you should consider applying to a massage therapy school. You're so good at this." He arched his back that she help relax its muscles.

"What?" He frowned when tilted his head to find Beca glaring at him.

"I really hate you sometimes, asshole," she mumbled before launching herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck before she kissed him.

He fell back on the couch and held her waist, pretty confused because, a, she told him she's just got her period which meant sex was off the table even if she was game since the first couple of days were basically the elevator scene from the shining, b, why did she say she hated him sometimes, what did he do?

"Is that The Posies' song?" he asked, pulling away to catch his breath.

"What?" It was her turn to get confused.

" _I really hate you sometimes_ ," he sang, vaguely recalling the melody of the song that crossed his mind.

"I don't even know The Posies," she told him.

He wanted to ask why she called him an asshole but her tongue was in his mouth in a matter of seconds.

He thought he got used to her enthusiasm but the rate she was going at proved him otherwise, he'd rather go at a slower pace. Usually, he'd try to keep up with her but being overworked made it difficult.

"Sorry. Do you want me to stop?" she abruptly pulled away to ask. "I won't take it personally. You're really tired and should be to bed."

"No, not at all, I'm into this—" he would have said more if she didn't interrupt him with a kiss.

"Cool," she mumbled, one hand gripping his hair while the other explored his bare torso. She knew he couldn't match her pace although he was trying to, so she slowed down a little with the kissing and dry humped the shit out of him until she came, then got on her knees and got him off.

* * *

"Dude, are you still there?" she asked, coming back from the bathroom—she went to change her tampon while he recovered.

"Barely," he answered. He was leaning against the couch, exactly how she left him but at least his junk wasn't out. He reached out a hand then opened one eye to look at her when she didn't take his hand and waited until she did before he pulled her closer while kicking off his shoes.

"Jesse, I have to go work in like thirty minutes," she told him when he wrapped her in his arms and laid on his side.

"You did this, deal with it."

He was seriously lucky, not only she made his back and neck feel good but she gave him a very unexpected blowjob, there was no way he was going to able work after that.

"Sneak out like you always do after I'm out." He just wanted to fall asleep, cuddling preferably.

He inhaled deeply, breathing in the smell of her shampoo, then smiled sleepily when she snuggled up to him. "It's 'I _may_ hate you sometimes', look it up, great song."

"Huh?" His voice was really drowsy, it wasn't clear what he said. She frowned when he started singing instead of repeating himself.

" _I don't want to have to sacrifice to have to get along. I don't even want to be the one to say I'm wrong. I may hate you sometimes, but I'll always love you._ "

His singing was very off key.

He mumbled worse than Kurt Cobain, she barely understood a word he sang.

But it was kinda hot.

"I had the album on cassette…" he trailed off.

She tilted her head to look at him hearing the familiar soft snoring, he fell asleep mid-sentence.

Beca waited for five minutes until he was tight asleep then got up. She went to his bedroom and grabbed a duvet since he was spending the night on the couch and a pillow because he liked to hold one in his sleep.

She found herself humming the melody of the song he tried to sing as she put her laptop in her back bag, looking up the band and the title once she was about to head out and planning to check out the album once she got to the radio station.

* * *

 _A road trip to Jacksonville with carsick Beca_.

Jesse kind of ready himself for some grumpiness from her because she was also on her period but he was positive that it was going go smoothly for the most part.

Besides, it was barely a 3 hours' drive to his parents' farm, not counting traffic, and he was excited to hear what playlist she got together because told him she was going to pick the music.

The drive went fine, Beca's very excusable grumpiness aside.

He left Thororeo with his neighbor who was going to watch over the kitten until he's back, picked her up from campus after he got off work, and hit road, arriving around nine to the farm.

The lights were on in the house and he, of course, knew who beat them to the farm before he even laid his eyes on the car parked in the driveway.

"You think they went out?" Beca asked as she readjusted the strap of her back bag and looked around her.

"No, they're here. Adam is too lazy to go out and not take his car." He locked the door and walked further inside the house.

"Told you," he continued, hearing the shower upstairs as well muffled sex noises.

Beca arched an eyebrow, noting the way Jesse smirked to himself. "Wanna know how Adam and I would greet each other growing up?" he asked as he began walking towards the front door.

"Sure." She shrugged and followed him.

"We'd prank each other," he informed.

She followed in tow to the basement door and walked down the stairs after him.

"You're gonna cut the power?" she guessed.

"Yep," his answer came fast.

"Dude, you sure your sister-in-law wouldn't get mad?" Beca wondered, tapping on the flashlight app on her phone, as he flipped the electricity switches.

"Yeah, she'll take it with good humor." He sighed happily. "C'mon, let's find a hiding place, Adam will come down here at some point." He reached for her hand and took it in his.

"Your car is parked right outside of the house," she reminded. "He'll know you're behind this."

He shrugged, interlocking their fingers.

She took his lead.

He gave her a boost so she could through a window and into the house then jumped after her and she had to admit that it was pretty fun.

"Jesse, you mother—" Beca had to suppress a laugh when she heard who she assumed was Adam shout and cut himself off before he insulted his own mother. "I know you're behind this, asshole."

"You don't know that," a female voice, further than Adam's, said and Beca assumed it was Chloe. "Could be thieves, stop shouting."

"Stay upstairs," Adam spoke in a lower voice.

Hearing Adam cuss as he looked around the house for his phone in the dark was too funny and Jesse could barely keep his chuckles low.

It took Adam around half an hour to find his phone, which he used as a flashlight, and go down the basement to get the power working again.

"All right, come out, asshat, your car is parked outside, I know you're in here somewhere," Adam said, sounding less mad.

Jesse chuckled, letting go of Beca's hand and stepping out of the room where they were hiding.

"Hey," Jesse greeted cheerfully, laughing once he got a visual of his wet frowning brother who had a towel wrapped around his waist. "Oh, come here, you," he continued as he walked over to his brother and embraced him his arms, hugging him.

"Ow," Jesse laughed, receiving a punch in the gut from Adam before he hugged him back.

"Good to see you, schmuck," Adam said as they broke the hug.

"You, too," Jesse grinned back. "A-Town, this is my friend Beca," he introduced while gesturing at Beca who was standing near the doorway of the room in which they hid.

"Hi," Beca smiled at the man she had seen in pictures but never in person.

"Hi, sorry you have to meet me half naked." He walked over to her and extended a hand towards her. "It's a pleasure, nonetheless," he was saying as they shook hands.

Beca looked up hearing a squeal and saw Chloe rush down the stairs and get enveloped in a bear hug from Jesse.

"I've missed you so much," she was saying as she pulled her head back and cupped his face.

"I've missed you just as much," he retorted, receiving a forceful kiss on his cheek.

"You've lost weight," she observed, squeezing his face in her hands. "You okay?"

"He just pulled a shitty prank on us, he's fine, Chloe," Adam deadpanned.

Chloe dramatically sighed, letting go of his face and rubbing Jesse's arm instead then tilted her head to look at Adam only then noticing Beca.

"You must be Beca," Chloe beamed. Jesse told her he was bringing a friend and that the friend's name was Beca but didn't go into details like she would have liked.

"Chloe," Chloe introduced herself and walked the few feet distance separating her and Beca and pulled the brunette into a hug that surprised Beca in a lot of different ways. "We'll totes get to know each other better," Chloe was saying as she pulled away unfazed with Beca's stiffness.

Beca tried to keep a genuine smile on her face as she held Chloe's gaze, it was hard given the barely tied bathroom: it wasn't just her boobs she could see. She peeked down inevitably and Chloe saw it and didn't seem bothered.

"After we finish what Jesse interrupted," she continued, reaching for Adam's hand and taking it in hers.

"Figured what's for dinner?" Jesse casually asked as Adam and Chloe took the stairs.

"No, but we bought grocery, make something and I might consider making payback merciful," Adam told him over his shoulders.

* * *

AN: Your feedback is greatly appreciated so thanks for that... thank you for stopping by and reading.


	8. Chapter 8

AN: Greetings, people. Sorry, it's been forever. I hope you like this chapter.

* * *

Jesse decided that watching a movie he loved so much as he turned thirty was a very reasonable way to start his thirties.

He should have gone to sleep early because he was sure he wasn't going to get any sleep the next day but what the hell.

Beca joined him when he told her his plan, so that was nice… her company was nice.

"Jesus." He heard Beca murmur and snorted. "Is it because the house is so big and is like echoy or are they really loud?" she asked.

"They're loud."

They were in the living room while Chloe and Adam were upstairs and they could hear them very well.

He grabbed the remote control and turned the volume up a few notches to cover the sex noises.

He didn't have to tilt his head to notice the way she was rubbing her thighs together, he could see her from the corner of his eye. He considered teasing for getting turned on by what they could hear then decided on another approach.

Jesse threw his arm around her shoulder and rubbed her arm, pulling her slowly towards him until she was leaning against him.

The only time they took things slow was on the first they hooked up and only because they had to take it slow since it was her first time, so he figured they should do that again.

She liked it when he stroked her hair so he sneaked his hand up and gently caressed her hair.

«You can't give me shit for falling asleep watching a movie if you don't stop doing that,» she mumbled, resting her head against his shoulder and snuggled up to him.

Lulling her to sleep wasn't his intention but he continued to stroke her as he thought of his next move. He chuckled as he realized that he was so off his game and was struggling to initiate sex with his fuck buddy... well, not actual sex, a make-out session.

Come to think of it, he realized that he never really initiated sex with Beca, they'd just do it which arguably was pretty normal for their kind of relationship.

«Okay, what are you doing?» she asked, feeling him rub his hand between her thighs.

He shrugged, moving his hand up and sneaking it under her t-shirt. «Warmth helps with period cramps, doesn't?»

«Yeah, but I feel fine now,» she said, taking his hand and holding it to keep it still.

«You have really small hands,» Jesse remarked as he interlocked their fingers.

«Comes with being five-foot-two,» she replied. «Now, either shut up and watch the movie or let's turn it off and just talk instead.»

«Sorry,» he apologized and looked at the movie that he had lost interest in.

He saw an opening when she rotated her neck and went for it, kissing her behind the ear.

«Jesse?» He could hear the confusion in her voice. She made fun of him for how seriously he took watching movies and compared it to a religious practice which made what he was doing beyond strange.

«Don't mind me,» he said to her ear before he moved to her neck.

«But what about the movie?» she asked, tilting her head so he'd have better access.

«I've seen it a million times,» he mumbled into her neck. «You keep watching, though.»

She pulled her head back to look him the eye. «I won't just sit here like a freaking corpse and let you do all the work.»

«I'm trying to be seductive here, Becs.»

«Just ask, dude.» She rested her palm on his chest. «That's all you gotta do, no need for the extra effort.»

It's how things had always been between them, they'd just ask if the other person is up for some casual sex.

«You're right,» he nodded. «I just thought some change of pace would be nice. And, no, this isn't me telling you I can't keep up with you anymore. I can, I just want to take it slow for a change. Would that be okay with you?»

She took a little too long before she nodded.

«Awesomesauce,» he smiled at her.

He could tell from the way she responded to him that she liked what they were doing, she liked a slow make-out session. At first, he felt like he was trying to tame a freaking wild animal, which wasn't a surprise since he always matched her pace and was her only partner, but she stopped unintentionally trying speed things up eventually.

«Well, well, well, what do we have here?»

Jesse covered Beca with his body at the voice of his brother to keep him from seeing her breasts.

«Don't, not now,» Jesse said, tilting his head to look at Adam.

Adam let out a sarcastic laugh. «You should have thought twice before you decided to pull your shitty prank,» he sighed and sat on the coffee table facing them. «Beca, I'm sure you're a lovely person and I'm sorry you got lumped into this. He should have known better.»

«I understand,» she replied, hoping the heat she felt on her cheeks wasn't visible.

«Could you get fucked for a second so Becs could put a shirt on?» Jesse wondered.

Adam shook his head. «Couldn't you take it to a bedroom, you horndog? Our parents nap here and might even bone here.»

«Ew, man,» Jesse said in disgust.

«Yeah, think about that,» Adam smirked. «Our parents flopping on top of each other on this very couch.»

«Stop,» Jesse dragged the word, burying his face into Beca's neck who was chuckling while playing with his hair.

«Is it working, have you lost your boner?» Adam wondered.

Jesse groaned so Beca decided to answer for him. «No.» She could feel his erection very well through the fabric of their sweatpants. «He's good.»

«Huh, well, if a mental image of our parents having sex doesn't do the trick I don't know what would.»

«Grandparents doing kinky stuff?» Beca suggested.

«Don't encourage him,» Jesse grumbled.

«I like her, Schmuck,» Adam laughed.

«Don't you have a wife to go back to?» Jesse asked, looking up from Beca's neck.

«My wife is currently in deep slumber and you should be asleep too, with the amount of stuff she's so thoughtfully arranged for us you gonna need to be well rested.»

«Then what are you doing up?» Jesse countered.

«Got up for a snack,» Adam said as he stood up. «You kids keep doing your thing, I'll be right back.»

Beca smiled at the annoyed look on Jesse's face as he watched his brother walk to the kitchen, she found it sort of cute.

«I'm sorry about Adam,» he apologized, grabbing her t-shirt from the floor while still on top of her because he wasn't going to risk letting Adam see her boobs.

«A little sibling rivalry doesn't bother me.» She shrugged.

«Yeah, but you shouldn't have to endure it, I only mess with him when Chloe is around 'cause I know for a fact she really doesn't mind.» He threw the t-shirt over the couch when she didn't take it from him.

«I really don't mind either,» she told him, calming his hair that she was responsible for the messy state it was in. «Besides, he didn't really do anything worth getting pissed at like cutting the power while I'm in the shower.» She saw a smile form on his lips and leaned in when he did, not fighting the smile that crept on her face once he kissed her.

She had a weird feeling that she didn't mind or think too hard about because she figured it was due to taking it slow, something she wasn't used to it.

«Oh, I see what's going on here. Reverse psychology doesn't work on me, Schmuck,» Adam said before he took a bite from the sandwich he just made himself.

«What are you talking about?» Jesse asked, pulling away from the kiss he and Beca were sharing.

«Acting like you don't mind the cock-blocking so I'd leave you alone.»

«I actually don't mind a crowd,» Beca lied smoothly. «If you're comfortable watching the guy you shared the womb with have sex you have my permission,» Beca said, mustering her best indifferent tone.

Jesse found the tone of her voice impressive because he knew her, she wouldn't even let him see her naked unless they were doing the deed, having his brother watch them would probably be the reason she'd go see a therapist.

«I can't tell if you're bluffing or are for real,» Adam said after maintaining eye contact with Beca for a few seconds. «Remind me to never play poker with you.» He swallowed the bite he had been chewing then left.

«Night, A-Town,» Jesse called after his brother, grinning like a child on Christmas morning.

«What's with this?» he asked, placing a peck on the frown that formed on her forehead.

«Your brother is gonna think we're a thing,» she stated.

«Probably, yeah.» He shrugged. «Well, until I correct him, I guess. Does it bother you to wait until I clear it up tomorrow or do I have to go and tell him now?»

She shook her head. «That won't be necessary, weirdo.»

«Good. 'Cause I'd rather not,» he mumbled, leaning in slowly until his lips were pressed against hers.

* * *

«Morning, nerd,» Beca lazily mumbled, barely opening her eyes to look at Jesse who had just entered the room. «Generic birthday wishes,» she said and hugged the duvet.

«Thanks,» he chuckled.

Noting the fact that he was in a towel, she checked him out before she pushed herself up to check her surroundings then she laid back not recalling ever going to bed.

«I took the liberty of carrying you here when you fell asleep.»

He went to clean up after the make-out session and found her asleep when he came back.

«What?» he asked hearing her groan after a few moments of silence.

«I don't wanna get out of bed yet but I don't wanna get TSS either,» she told him. «TSS is no laughing matter,» she added hearing him snort.

«Sorry,» he apologized, placing clothes he picked for the day on the bed. «It's super serious and dangerous, get up,» he said and watched her cover her head with the duvet.

He got dressed quickly then took matters into his own hands, removing the duvet and grinning at the death glare she shot him. «You can't kill me, it's my birthday,» he said in amusement.

She sighed and pulled herself up, climbing out of bed and scratching her head as she looked for her bag.

«Why are you up so early?» she asked as she grabbed a tampon.

"I have to go pick Sarah up from the airport," he informed, taking a seat on the bed to wear his shoes.

«Your sister?» she checked.

«Yep,» he replied, nodding. «You cool staying here or do you wanna come with me?»

«I'm gonna go back to bed for a few more hours,» she yawned, walking to the nightstand to grab her phone when it rang.

«Who's calling you this early?» he wondered when she rejected the call once she saw who was calling.

«Nobody,» she answered. He eyed her speciously, making her roll her eyes. «It's just mom,» she told him. «We had a stupid argument.»

He wanted to know more but knew he shouldn't ask because her dysfunctional family was a sensitive subject that she avoided talking about.

«Generic comforting words,» he mumbled, getting up, and smiled when she did. «Get in here,» he said and opened his arms, embracing her in a tight hug.

«You smell different,» she mumbled into his chest.

«I used Adam's aftershave, do you like it?» he wanted to know, loosening his hold when he felt her pull away.

«Yeah, it's nice.» He nodded making a mental note to change brands of aftershave not just because she liked it, he also did. «So are you heading out right now?» At her question, he looked at his watch.

«No, her plane won't land until ten am. I woke up early 'cause you kinda kicked me in your sleep.»

«I did not!» she didn't want to believe she did.

«You did, it was kinda cute... it hurt but I imagine it's how it would be like if an elf attacked me.» She took the jab at her height in good humor and settled for rolling her eyes at him and also punching him in the guts.

«Is this why you don't like spending the night over? 'Cause of your mad ninja skills?»

«Why do you care so much about where I spend the night?» she countered with a question.

He shrugged at her question. «I can't cuddle with you when you're not around, now, can I?»

«Hold a pillow in your sleep,» she told him despite knowing very well that he did hold a pillow in his sleep.

«I prefer holding a human being,» he replied, anticipating her next suggestion would be to hold his cat. «You happen to make a perfect snuggle bunny.»

«I don't care that it's your birthday, you can't call me that and live to see another day,» she told him.

He rolled his eyes. «You let me get away with worse and have proven yesterday that you master the art of bluffing. Besides, you can't get rid of me.»

«Excuse you?» She arched an eyebrow at the statement he made.

«You heard me.» He stood up.

«You're so full of yourself, Jesse,» she said in amusement. «You are also very replaceable.»

«Am I now?»

She nodded. «Finding dudes who are up for some casual sex is pretty easy when you're in college. So, yeah, totally replaceable.» The main reason she wanted friends with benefits relationship with Jesse was the fact that he had experience: he would be perfect at showing her the ropes of having a good sexual encounter, which he did.

«Good luck finding someone who would not only rock your world but also break the law and purchase liquor for you _and_ hook you up with pot. I have never been arrested in my life, I'm putting my clean record at risk for you.»

«Willingly,» she added. «No one is pointing a gun at your head.»

«True.» He nodded. «I guess, I just like to live my life dangerously.» He grinned at the eye roll his words got.

* * *

«Is your _friend_ still asleep?» Adam asked, glancing away from the stove and bringing his mug of coffee to his lips.

«Good morning and happy birthday to you too, Adam.» Jesse rolled his eyes, walking to the coffeemaker to pour himself a mug of freshly brewed coffee. He took the empty mug Adam held up silently asking for a refill.

«Making Chloe breakfast?» he guessed, noting that his brother was making chocolate chips pancakes that he knew were Chloe's favorite.

Adam nodded in response.

«She's really put a lot of effort into putting this together,» Jesse noted, guessing that making Chloe breakfast was Adam's way of thanking her for all the work she had to do to make sure all of their close friends and relatives could attend and celebrate their birthday with them, get the right kind of drinks and food, and probably get them the most considered birthday gifts.

«Chloe plans weddings, this is child play for her.» Adam sipped his coffee once Jesse refilled his mug, flipping the pancakes. «It's just that nausea ain't bad anymore,» he casually said. «Thought I'd make her something she likes since she won't throw it up.»

It took Jesse a split second before it hit him. «You're having a baby?!» he exclaimed.

Adam froze and almost spilled his coffee when Jesse threw an arm around his shoulder pulling him into a hug.

«Congratulations, man! This is so awesome.» Jesse grinned letting go of his brother.

«Yeah,» Adam scratched his stubble. «Don't say anything to Chloe, we're not supposed to let anyone know yet.»

Jesse nodded, chuckling a little at his brother inability to keep a secret. «How far along is she? And how are you two adjusting?» he wanted to know.

«A little over three months. It's been going pretty well overall. She just sleeps a lot more now. Yesterday you interrupted the first time we had sex in like two months,» Adam grumbled.

«I feel kinda bad.» Jesse rubbed the back of his neck, deciding to not mess with his brother unless he's the only one affected by the prank. «But you got back at me so we're even and I don't owe you an apology,» Jesse reasoned, moving to put bread in the toaster.

«Chloe is gonna want to know why you introduced your girlfriend as just a friend,» Adam said.

«Becs isn't my girlfriend,» he told him, sipping his coffee and pulling jam from the fridge.

«What were you doing on top of her last night, giving her a breast exam?»

«We just hang out sometimes, it's not serious,» Jesse said, deciding not to straight up tell Adam the nature of their relationship.

He just didn't want to hear what Adam would say, the asshole knew him too well, he knew Jesse didn't do casual sex and would want to talk about it and make sure he was okay. He didn't want to talk about his feelings with his brother, he was paying a professional to do that.

«She seems young, how old is she?» Adam turned off the stove, putting the plate full of pancakes on a tray then grabbing some peaches to wash and make juice out of.

«Nineteen,» Jesse answered and watched Adam tilted his head to look at him as he washed the fruits.

«And, how exactly did you manage to get her to notice you? Girls her age wouldn't usually go for older men unless they're looking for a sugar daddy and you're neither old enough or rich to be one. Either that or they have mad daddy issues.» He began slicing the peach and putting the slices in the blender.

Jesse rolled his eyes at him, throwing what was left of the toast into his mouth and washing it down with coffee. «Try to remember that you're not alone in the house when you wake Chlo up,» he told his brother who nodded.

* * *

«Baby brother,» Sarah called, walking towards Jesse while holding two drinks.

«Sarabara,» he retorted, accepting the glass of whiskey she handed him.

«This is great,» she stated after swallowing the sip she took of her own drink while looking around her.

«Yeah,» Jesse agreed.

The party was a banger to no one surprise, Chloe excelled at planning parties. Jesse had a really good time catching up with his close friends and family who flew from different states just to celebrate with him and his brother.

«I'm totally asking Chloe to plan my wedding if I get married, not just for the family discount,» she told him.

«Pretty sure Chloe would get mad if we let anyone but her plan any important party,» Jesse said in amusement then glanced for what would be the fifth time in the last fifteen minutes at Beca who was chatting with a cousin of his.

«Do mom and dad know you're dating a kid?» she asked him. He glared her for half a minute for her choice of words until she snorted. «Fine, a young _adult._ »

«We're not dating, we just hang out sometimes,» he told her what he told his brother.

«Well, what are you waiting for to ask her to be your girlfriend?» she wondered.

«We just hang out sometimes and aren't looking for a serious relationship,» he answered.

«If you say so,» she muttered.

«You and Kelly patched up,» he noted to change the subject to his sister's complicated and hard to keep track of love life.

«Yeah,» she nodded, glancing at her significant other who was busy beating someone's ass at drowning shots.

«When?» he wanted to know, genuinely interested. Last time he checked up on her, two months ago, they had been on a break for about six months.

«Last week.»

«Uh huh.»

«She got fired and just needed to talk about it with someone, I told her to come over...» she trailed off.

«Got it,» he nodded, cutting her off before she got into details of how they made up—he could do without a mental picture of his sister and her girlfriend.

«Things are good,» she said with a sigh and he truly hoped they stayed that way. «Really good.»

«Good sex doesn't equal a good relationship, Sarah,» Jesse reminded.

«I know,» she said in annoyance.

«I know you do, a reminder wouldn't hurt.» He shrugged, tilting his head to check on Beca again.

«So, whose idea was it to just hang out sometimes?» Sarah asked, following his gaze.

«Mutual agreement,» he mumbled. Beca was being a little too friendly, it wouldn't be long until his cousin Seth made a move.

«Chloe will start drafting the guest list of your wedding if you don't stop looking at her and Seth all jelly.»

«Jelly? How old are you?» He snapped his head back to look at her.

«I teach high school kids,» she said in defense.

«You teach them English, and you're supposed to influence them not be influenced by them.»

«Well, I don't feel like a creep checking her out,» Sarah said, ignoring what he said, and checked Beca out.

«Don't check her out.» Jesse nudged her. «You have a girlfriend, leave mine alone.»

«A-ha! So you do admit she's your girlfriend.»

«That's not— it slipped my tongue... like your thing with jelly and your students,» he rambled, making his older sister laugh.

«Jesse, buddy,» she sighed, cupping his cheek. «It's fine that you're dating someone really young, no one is judging you. I for one am happy that you kick that whore out of your system and started dating.»

«We're not dating, we just have sex,» he told her bluntly. «We have an agreement, she doesn't want to date, and I'm not ready to date again.»

Sarah rubbed her thumb against his cheek. «Glad you're getting laid, baby brother.»

Jesse sighed, slightly relieved that Sarah didn't try to therapize him like he knew Adam would.

«Hooking up with the same person frequently without any strings attached is tricky, though,» she continued, dropping her hand.

«I know the drill,» he nodded. «No emotional attachments, keep it physical, yadda yadda yadda. We're both know what we want: Becs just wants someone with experience to gain experience. As for me it's basically an extended rebound hook up.»

«Damn, Jesse, out of the three of us, you're the last one I thought would have a successful friends-with-benefits relationship. I'm truly impressed. Does Adam know?»

«He knows...sort of.»

«Elaborate,» she demanded.

«I just told him we hang out and that it's not serious, didn't tell him we're sex friends.»

She looked away from him while sipping her drink. «Looks like your _buddy_ is getting laid tonight.» At her words, Jesse tilted his head to look where Beca was standing: he saw nothing that indicated what his sister said.

He frowned looking back at Sarah and found a knowing look. «Be honest, did it make your heart clench to hear that she'd be sleeping with someone else?» she asked him.

«Yes, but it's not what you think,» he grumbled. «Seth is the problem. He's a sexist dick, you know him.»

«And since when are one night stands based on personality?» She rested her elbow on his shoulder. «It's a rhetorical question you don't have to answer,» she added when he shrugged her elbow off.

«So is Beca a hundred percent sure of her sexuality?» Sarah asked and snorted at the look of horror Jesse gave her. «Don't look at me like that, everyone her age gets a bit bi-curious.» She took a sip of her drink. «I'll be happy to show her the ropes.»

«Again, you have a girlfriend.»

«We're just got back together and haven't even had a proper talk about our situation, I'm sure Kell is sleeping with other people.»

«You should probably ask her if she is and not make assumptions, Sarah.» He shook his drink. «Why are you putting it off, the relationship talk?» he wanted to know.

«I've done it enough times to know how it'll go down,» she said in boredom.

«Sarabara,» he called slowly.

«I know,» she sighed, rubbing her forehead. «I know, alright? I know I shouldn't be doing this... it's just easier to just have sex and not talk.»

Jesse pulled his sister into a hug and rested his chin on her head.

«I made a coke, coffee, and vodka cocktail, there's a fifty percent chance we have a heart attack if we drink it, you guys in?» Adam was saying as he walked towards his siblings.

«Wait, am I interrupting a sappy moment?»

«No,» Jesse answered while rubbing Sarah's arm. «And, no to the cocktail, you of all people should know better than to do something as stupid.»

«Yeah, think about your amazing relationship, fucktard. It would be a shame if it ended because you drank rat poison in the liquor form and died of a heart attack,» Sarah mumbled before she chugged down some of her drink.

«It's a joke. Of course, I'm not _that_ dumb. This is coke and rum,» Adam said and held his drink up. «You okay, Sarah?»

«Yeah,» she answered bitterly. "I'm great."

Adam looked at Jesse who shook his head.

«I think you could use a group hug,» Adam told his older sister and stepped closer.

«Aw, look at them,» Chloe coed, eyeing the siblings hugging, gaining Beca's attention who had just excused herself from Seth to go get a refill.

Beca followed Chloe's gaze and smiled at the sight.

«Swansons like to hug, huh?» she mumbled, and Chloe hummed in response while she snapped a photo of the siblings on her phone.

Beca snorted, noting that Chloe had zoomed in on Adam's ass and realized another thing about the Swanson siblings: all three had great butts.

She was taking a sip from the diet coke she was holding when Chloe spoke, «Is that a grasshopper on your arm?»

«Yeah,» Beca nodded, extending her arm to give Chloe a better look at the grasshopper tattooed on her arm.

«I have a ladybug on my wrist,» she shared, showing Beca the tattoo.

«It's nice,» Beca said while eyeing the small tattoo.

«Thanks, yours is too. Got more?» She glanced at Beca's other arm.

«Um, yeah,» she nodded and showed her the headphones on her wrist. «Got stuff on my back, too.»

«Can I see them?» Chloe requested, giving Beca puppy dog eyes.

«Er—okay,» she found herself agreeing as she rubbed her nose.

«Awes.» The redhead grinned.

«Bathroom?» Beca suggested, not wanting to take off her shirt in a roomful of people, to which Chloe nodded.

«I love tattoos, but I can never decide on like a big one,» Chloe was saying as they walked. «I'm a Libra, I can never decide on anything, really.»

«Indecisiveness is a Libra thing?» Beca asked, reaching to open the door—she wasn't big on astrology but it was a good conversation topic.

«Yeah,» Chloe nodded. «What are you?»

«Scorpio,» Beca answered, placing her drink on the sink while Chloe locked the door.

«Oh, okay,» Chloe nodded.

«Know anything about Scorpios?» Beca wondered as she unbuttoned her shirt.

«Yep,» Chloe replied. «Scorpios are known to be secretive and like have super reserved personas.»

«Huh, I guess I can use that next time dad nags me over being distant,» Beca joked, trying not to maintain eye contact as she took off her shirt, staying only in a bra.

She turned around and gave Chloe her back.

«Wow, this is really cool.» Beca then felt Chloe's fingers trailing the details on the rose tattooed on her shoulder.

«Thanks.» Beca looked over her shoulder.

«Is there a story behind it?» Chloe wondered.

«Yeah, it's a really personal one,» she mumbled.

«Oh, that's okay.» Chloe smiled at her. «I get it, you're a full-blown Scorpio.» She moved her fingers down to the horizontal thin lines tattooed on Beca's lower back. «These are pretty intriguing, bet their story is as interesting as the rose's one.»

The two tilted their heads towards the door when it got opened. «Sorry,» the person that opened it said and was about to back out when they did a double take. «Chloe?»

«Adam,» the redhead smiled.

«What going on here?» He frowned, looking between the half-naked brunette and the redhead he married.

«Oh, Beca's just showing me her tattoos,» Chloe told him and stepped a little to left so he could see them, too.

«Nice ink you got there,» he noted.

«Thanks,» Beca awkwardly said as she grabbed her shirt, quickly putting it on.

«Well, you should go find Jesse, he's looking for you,» Adam was saying as he stepped inside the bathroom and walked to the sink.

«What happened to you?» Chloe asked, seeing that he had something spilled on his t-shirt.

«Accidentally spilled my drink on myself,» he answered.

«Just take it off and try to wash the awful smell off, I'm gonna get you a clean one,» Chloe sighed.

«Thanks, babe.» He pecked her cheek before she left.

«Hey, Bec, there you are. Wow!» Jesse exclaimed, stepping into the bathroom to find Beca tugging her shirt into her pants while his brother stood shirtless near her.

«What is happening here?» he questioned, closing the door behind him.

«Jesse, come sniff me,» Adam said as he glanced at his brother. «I can't tell I still smell like rum. And, Beca's had enough invasion of personal space for the day.»

Jesse walked over to his brother and shook his head after he smelled him. «You smell like soap.» He looked at Beca, a frown on his forehead.

«Chloe wanted to see the tattoos on my back,» Beca shed some light.

«Okay,» Jesse nodded slowly. «Where's Chloe?»

«She left to get me a clean shirt,» Adam sighed, drying himself with a towel.

«If I didn't know you, I'd think something really nasty happened here,» Jesse mumbled, gaining an eye roll from both Adam and Beca.

«When I walked in and found Chloe's hands on your girlfriend's back, I thought something beautiful was happening if you catch my drift.»

This time it was Jesse rolling their eyes while Beca arched an eyebrow at the label Adam used to describe her.

«Gross,» Jesse deadpanned.

«Not,» Adam shrugged. «Nothing gross about two women getting on. Our sister is gay, Jesse! How would she feel if she heard that's what you think?» he said in mock disappointment.

«Okay, I'm out of here before it gets out of hand,» Jesse decided, reaching to take Beca's hand in his and leading her out of the bathroom.

«Why did you brother call me your girlfriend?» Beca asked, pulling her hand from Jesse's once they were away from the bathroom. «You didn't tell him we're _not_ together, did you?»

«Why does it even matter?»

«Why didn't you tell him?» she asked in response.

«Can we go somewhere quiet?» he wondered, not wanting to get any attention from the people at the party. She took a moment before nodding then taking his lead.

Jesse waited until they were outside the house before he gave her an honest answer.

« I wanted to tell him about us, but being in therapy changes things,» he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck.

He hadn't told his brother about the meltdown despite the fact he had and he and his brother had the kind of relationship where they told each other everything.

«I'm not comfortable telling him personal things because I will end up over-sharing and I don't want to make him worry. And for the record, I never said you're my girlfriend, I just told him we hang out and that it's not serious.»

«Adam said you were looking for me,» she recalled and tilted her head to look at him. «What's up?»

«Nothing.» He shrugged. «I just wanted to check up on you.» He couldn't see Seth anywhere, he wanted to know if she was with him. «You look really calm which is kinda scary,» he told her after eyeing her for a few seconds. «Is it the calm before a storm type of situation?» he continued.

She rolled her eyes in response. «Relax, I'm not gonna throw a hissy fit. Should have just told me, but it's fine.» She sighed.

She understood where he was coming from, keeping people closest to him out of the loop just to not make them worry. She also could tell he hated doing it, it wasn't like him to keep things from his brother. So she figured it would be best if she let it go. He was feeling melancholic and she didn't want to make it worse.

«I'm sorry,» he apologized, scratching the stubble on his chin. He stood still when he saw her close the distance between them and hesitantly give him a hug, making his heart swell.

His heart was going to explode, he was sure of it. He wasn't sure why he was receiving a hug, though.

He could feel her loosen her hold and didn't want to let go, she felt good.

«What was that for?» he asked, willing himself to let go.

She shrugged. «You like hugs.»

«I _love_ hugs,» he corrected, his heart growing a few sizes at the second hug he received. «I could get used to this,» he mumbled into her hair then snorted. «Snuggle bunny,» he teased and felt her pull away instantly. «Oh, c'mon, it's a cute nickname.»

«I don't do cute,» she glared at him but didn't fight him when he enveloped her in his arms. He was going through some serious shit, and hugs seemed to be a great source of comfort so she figured she'd give them to give to him.

«Thanks,» he smiled at her, breaking the hug before he truly ruined the moment.

«You welcome.» She crossed her arms across her chest and putting some distance between them.

She cleared her throat, looking away when he stared for too long making her uncomfortable. He was certain she was uncomfortable when she bit her bottom lip. He wanted to kiss her the way he did the night before, all nice and slow.

 _'This is bad,'_ he thought to himself, feeling the dread amazing feeling in the pit of his stomach at the thought of being intimate with her. _'This is really bad.'_

Inhaling deeply he tried to keep a poker face in front of Beca.

«We're having a three-legged race, you two in?» Adam asked, peeking his head out of the front door.

«Er, yeah, sure,» Jesse answered then glanced at Beca who nodded.

«Great, here you go.» He threw a scarf for Jesse to catch. «May the odds be ever in your favor.» He did Rue's Whistle from the Hunger Games as he walked back inside the house.

«Everyone is drunk in there, we're totally goin' win,» Jesse said, hoping he sounded normal, and he stood right next to Beca and bent down to tie their legs together.

«What?» he asked as he straightened up and spotted a distressed look on Beca's face.

«Last time I played this game I fell and my front teeth fell, too.»

«Ouch, you getting flashbacks?» He watched her suck her teeth. «I'll have your back. Don't worry, you won't lose teeth tonight.» He patted her back when she nodded slowly. "Does this mean these are fake?" He tapped his own front teeth.

"No, the ones I lost were baby teeth."

"Aw, you were that young?" he coed, throwing his arm around her shoulder as they walked inside the house. "Please, tell me the tooth fairy made it up to you," he was saying as he thought of how they had to talk and inevitably end things and decided it could wait until they were back in Barden.

"You poor thing," he sighed when she shook her head.


	9. Chapter 9

Jesse tried to put what he came to realize earlier in the evening in the back of his mind and enjoy what was left of the night and failed horribly. Like, it was the only thing on his mind. His super tiny feelings towards the one and only Beca Mitchell. He blamed his sister for a while for putting it in his head in the first place but soon admitted to himself that she just pointed out what she saw; his not very platonic protectiveness of Beca.

It sucked that they were going to end their relationship because he really liked having as a friend who he regularly boned and knew that the minute he told her the reason behind ending their relationship she was going to stop talking to him, he just knew judging by how she reacted when he looked out for her at the nightclub.

"There you are. What are you doing out here, weirdo?" he asked, finding Beca outside by herself.

"Nothing," she replied.

He made his way to where she was standing on the porch and let out a breath as he lifted his head to look at the sky. "Wow, stars are bright tonight," he noted in awe.

"Huh?" she looked up from her phone and at the sky.

"Look, there's the great bear over there." He pointed at the stars that formed the said bear. "And there's Hercules there."

"All I'm seeing is a bunch of white dots, bright white dots."

"Dad would get a heart attack if he heard you say that," he chuckled. "He's so passionate about astrology," he recounted, tearing his eyes away from the sky to look at her. "And tried to get us into it so hard growing up…" he sighed.

"On a scale of one to your thing for movies, how passionate?"

"My thing for movies time ten."

"Got it." She nodded then glanced at her phone.

He tried to peek and saw several unanswered texts. "Who are you ghosting, Mitchell? Who's Eliza?"

She immediately hid the screen from him by pressing her phone against her chest.

"You never mentioned an Eliza before, are you in some sort of trouble, do I have to worry?"

"I'm not in trouble," she told him and stuffed her phone into her pocket.

"Thanks again for the present, Becs," he said breaking the silence they got in afterward.

He loved her both practical and sentimental present; shower curtains.

He had procrastinated buying shower curtains ever since he moved into his studio apartment and had to mope the floor every time he showered.

The sentimentality laid in what was printed on the fabric of the shower curtains: in the form of a panel drawings from the star wars universe: rebels spaceships attacking the death star, Yoda holding a lightsaber, Chewbacca, 3cpo, R2d2, Darth Vader, a couple of stormtroopers, the millennial falcon, and Boba Fett.

"You're welcome, again," she said in response then tilted her head to look at the door hearing someone walk out.

"We're taking the party to the beach," Sarah informed the two as she walked out of the house.

"First one to get there wins a five hundred bucks target gift card," Adam hollered as he ran past his sister.

"Wait up you fucking cheat, there's a fucking countdown," Sarah said, running after him.

"Countdowns are for losers." They could Adam reply as they watched most of the party attendees run out of the house in the direction of the beach, participating.

"What just happened?" Beca said in confusion once it was just her, Jesse, and Chloe on the porch.

"That, my friend, is Swanson competitively," Jesse said with a sigh.

"Why didn't you join in if it's a Swanson thing?" Beca wondered.

"Adam's already won that's why," he answered. "I only compete when I'm a hundred percent sure that I'm going to win," he explained.

"Wanna bet on that?" Chloe chimed in.

"On what?" Jesse wondered.

"On who will win the gift card. My guess is Sarah."

"Is there something I don't know? Is Adam hurt or something?" he wanted to know.

"He's fine, I just think Sarah is gonna win." Chloe shrugged. "Who do you think would win?" she asked Beca.

"Sarah, she seems like the kind of person that complains when people cheat but plays dirty to win," Beca said after giving it some thought.

"Sarah really is like that," Jesse said in amusement, thinking of all the times they played monopoly.

"You barely got to hang out with Sarah and you got her figured out," Chloe noted both impressed and surprised. "You must be an excellent judge of character."

* * *

By the time the trio made it to the beach, most people were in the sea.

"Don't even think about it, Swanson," Beca said before Jesse could speak, the look he gave her was enough.

"Already have." He grinned when she made a run for it and ran after her, hearing Chloe holler encouraging words.

It was his birthday and he was barely enjoying any of it, he had to catch up.

Beca let out a squeal when he caught her that caused him to laugh.

"Jesse, no, I don't want to get into the water. It's cold. I don't wanna get all wet," she was whining and he found it hilarious. "Please, Jesse, I don't wanna get all wet." She stopped trying to fight him, realizing how pointless it was. He threw her over his shoulder and headed towards the beach.

"Ow!" he exclaimed when she kicked him really hard, her kick landing in a dangerous area. "What the hell is wrong with you?" He let her down.

"You were gonna make me swim." She was walking backward away from him.

"So you kick me in the balls?" He was in pain but she didn't really hit him where he said she did—it was a close one, though.

"I was aiming for your leg," she told him.

"I was trying to create a memory with you, a really fun one, and your response is to make me sterile?"

"You're being dramatic. It wasn't that hard of a kick." She quickened her pace when he started limping towards her and fell.

He sighed, approaching her with the intention of helping her get up. She clearly thought he had other intentions because she tried to kick him in the shin once he was close enough and she was still on the sand.

He managed to dodge her and then get a hold of her once she was on her feet.

"A formal apology and you're off the hook." He held her to make sure she couldn't hurt him. He couldn't help but grin when she looked up and had an adorable annoyed look on her face.

She huffed and stopped fighting his grip. But he wasn't an idiot, he wasn't going to loosen his hold.

"How about _a favor_ ," she mumbled in her awkward yet somehow sexy low voice, changing her tactic.

 _'Clever,'_ he thought to himself, clearing his throat when he felt her move in a rather distracting manner against his junk. "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me… aren't you?" He was not surprised that she didn't get the reference and made a mental note to make her watch the graduate.

"Just apologize for attempting to keep me from ever having children and I'll leave you alone… for now." He tried to keep her still and pressed her more firmly against himself which he realized wasn't a good call.

"I don't like the 'for now' part," she mumbled and pressed herself even more.

He bit back a groan when she moved again, making a weird growl sound instead. He composed himself before he spoke again. "Then you leave me no other choice." He picked her up.

"Fine, fine, fine, fine," she was quick to say and he carefully put her down while still maintaining a tight grip on her. "God, you're no fun," she deadpanned.

"Any minute now that apology would be great," he sighed dramatically.

"Please, accept _my sincere_ apology for the kick I gave you."

"Keep going," he encouraged when she went quiet.

"It was wrong of me to _defend_ myself by impulsively kicking you and I am truly sorry. I understand how hurt you are you are given the possible consequences of my actions," she grumbled. "And I _humbly_ ask for your forgiveness." She was glaring at him as she spoke which made it hard to keep a straight face.

"That wasn't so bad," he snorted. "I accept your apology but I'm not sure if it would be in my best interest if I let you go now. You look like you could kill me."

"I won't. Don't be stupid. I can't commit a murder when there are witnesses."

He looked around and could see that someone started a bonfire that people were gathering around. "Fair point."

He let go of Beca but kept his guard up in case she attempted to do anything.

She didn't.

"This is a great trust-building exercise," Jesse realized. "I'm not trying to protect my package from you despite the odds of you kneeing me in the balls." He could see her roll her eyes in the dimness at what was coming out his mouth which made him grin. "Huge step friendship wise, Becs."

"Or it could be just me not wanting to damage the only reason we hang out." She shrugged.

He faked a gasp, pretending to take offense. "I refuse to believe that my dick is THE reason why we hang out. Sex is more than just dick in vagina. Sex is a lot of funsies, dick in vagina included, Beca," he reminded and smiled when she let out a small laugh at his use of the word funsies.

She had a nice laugh. Nice enough he felt those damn butterflies in the pit of his stomach.

Stupid feelings getting in the way of things.

He wasn't in a place where he could gloss over feelings and maintain a friendship once they ended up the beneficial part of their friendship and he knew it yet he still wanted to be friends with her. They got along really well and it was just great to have her as a friend. She's a complicated weirdo who he had a soft spot for.

The mature thing was to cut all ropes and despite not wanting to be a responsible adult he was going to do the right thing and back off.

Hearing a shriek, the two tilted their heads to see Sarah get thrown in the water by none other than Adam.

"Is he trying to drown her?" Beca asked in puzzlement, failing to see the fun in what the siblings were doing.

"Yeah," Jesse answered with a shrug.

Hearing Sarah yelp Jesse's name, Beca could swear he perked up like a freaking puppy hearing owner call them for a walk.

"Um, can I leave my stuff with you?" he asked and began to undress when Beca nodded.

"Make good choices," she called after him as he ran towards the beach wearing nothing but his boxer shorts.

She watched Jesse go to his sister's rescue and shook her head before she locked eyes Chloe who gestured for her to join her near the bonfire.

"Sarah won the gift card," Chloe informed. "She cheated and won."

"Is that why Adam tried to drown her just now?" Beca asked as she took a seat near the redhead who chuckled, "No. That's just Adam upholding tradition."

Beca was going to ask for details about _the tradition_ Chloe brought but the redhead spoke before she could. "So," she sighed happily, eyeing the brunette. "How long have you and Jesse known each other?"

Beca busied herself by folding Jesse's clothes to avoid Chloe's gaze, finding it quite intimidating. "A few months."

"How did you guys meet?" Chloe then asked.

"My car broke down and he happened to be jogging by. He offered to help, figured out what's wrong, and fixed it."

"I met Jesse in a similar way, sort of," Chloe told her, grimacing. "Except, I was drunk at a party and he helped me sober up because I so was out of it then made sure I got safely to my dorm room."

Dorm. So they've known each other since college, Beca assumed.

"I actually asked him out next time we met at a party and got rejected pretty hard," she chuckled and Beca didn't hide her surprise.

"He was seeing Hollie back then," Beca figured because no sane man would say no to Chloe unless they were gay or in a relationship.

"Yeah." Chloe frowned. "Jesse told you about Hollie?"

Beca nodded in response.

"Huh." Chloe glanced at the shore to check on the siblings and smiled seeing that they were enjoying themselves. "I never liked her. And, it's not because I had feelings for Jesse and was jealous or something. I mean he's cute but I stopped thinking about him once I knew he was unavailable," she explained. "She used him a lot. Used the fact that he had a big heart a lot," she continued.

Beca found herself nodding again, wondering why Chloe would share her opinion of Hollie with her of all people. They barely knew each other, shouldn't they be talking about where they were from and their taste in music?

Sighing, Chloe said, "Enough about _her_ , tell me about yourself." She smiled warmly at Beca.

"I'm from Michigan," Beca stated.

"Northern."

"Yep, basically Canadian, eh," Beca joked to which Chloe chuckled.

"Well, how do you like the weather in Georgia, how are you handling the heat?"

"I spent several summers in Australia, I _know_ heat."

"Australia? We've been talking about going on holidays and Adam really wants us to go to Australia. Are there places you could recommend if we end up picking Australia as our destination?"

"Sure," Beca instantly said. "I know my way around Melbourne particularly but I'm familiar with Sydney, too."

"Why don't you give me your cell phone number and I'll let you know if we decided on Australia?" Beca nodded and took the redhead's phone to type down her phone number then called herself.

"You have family there?" Chloe wondered.

"Yeah," Beca replied curtly as she saved her number on the redhead's phone.

* * *

The drive back to Barden was quiet. Jesse had to stop for caffeine because he was starting to doze off while behind the wheel. Beca offered to drive and that's why he was going through the playlist she put together for the road, looking for a mashup he heard on the way to Jacksonville.

"Someone is calling you," he informed the brunette driving his car, noticing that her phone was vibrating.

She merely glanced at it before deciding to ignore it. He peeked. The name that was on the screen was Eliza, probably the one she was also ignoring her texts the night before. He was curious but not enough to ask.

Leaning against his seat, he decided to look out of the window and work on how he was going to approach the "break up". They were in a way breaking up, they were breaking up their arrangement.

He was going to be direct and honest.

He figured in a few days he'd make plans with her to grab lunch or coffee and tell her that he wanted to end things.

Should go well.

He was debating whether or not he should let her know why he was ending it then reminded himself that he was going to be direct and honest and letting her know the truth was mandatory.

He didn't even know why he was thinking too much about it.

Yeah, he liked her. He wasn't going to deny it to himself. But there was nothing there. And, it wasn't even about their arrangement itself. She was 19 and the last thing she needed was to get involved romantically with 30-year-old who had his own set of issues to work through.

"Jesse?"

"Yes?" he replied, tilting his head to look at her.

"I asked if you want to eat, I saw a sign, there's a restaurant in a few miles." He didn't realize he was so deep in his thoughts that he didn't even hear her.

"Yeah, I could eat," he answered.

"Cool."

He smiled, eyeing her, she was cute when she was all focused, then looked down at her phone when it vibrated again.

"Beca, Nana is calling," he told her, reading the caller's ID. She pulled her earphones from her pocket and tossed them his way. "Plug 'em, please."

He grabbed her phone and did what she asked him to do then watched her wear an earphone and pick up.

"Hey," she greeted, her voice warm and welcoming. There was a small pause before she rolled her eyes. "Yes, I've been eating greens now and then."

Jesse snorted at what she said and leaned forward to lower the volume so Beca could hear her grandmother better. For the next maybe thirty seconds, Beca's replies were "uh huhs" and "yeahs" and "okays" and the tone of her voice went from genuinely happy to be on the phone with her grandmother to annoyed but still polite.

* * *

"Everything alright there?" he felt the need to ask Beca who was violently stabbing her salad.

"Yeah," she replied.

He didn't believe her and the look he gave her was enough to let her know he didn't. She rolled her eyes in response. "It's just my parents," she mumbled, putting the fork down and sucking her teeth. "I can't believe they brought nana into it."

"What is it exactly?"

"I suppose you can call it 'family drama'," she sighed, using air quotation.

"Wanna talk about it?" he carefully said, offering to listen.

She ran a hand through her hair, thinking. "My mother and I aren't exactly close. Like, we barely ever talk these days. And, I'm fine with it. It doesn't bother me." She shrugged, grabbing the fork to play with the salad in front of her. "Right before winter break she invited me to spend break with her and I said no 'cause I was spending break with nana. She got weird after that."

"How?" he asked when she went quiet.

"Like, she calls for no particular reason and texts when I don't pick up. I'm sure that's normal for regular parents, parents who are involved in their kids' lives." He nodded. "But not for kids whose parents forget to call them on their birthday," she bitterly continued. "The whole reconnecting thing seemed fishy to me so I asked her what she wanted so we could go back to how things were. She got mad at me."

"Is that why your grandmother called?" He picked up his glass of water and brought it to his lips.

She shook her head. "Apparently, she worked things out with her dad and it made her see how much of a shitty parent she is— never met the guy. Pretty sure he left her and her mother when she was really young— she really wants me to meet the guy," she informed.

"When I told her I can't just drop things here and go meet him. She blew it out of proportion and got mad at me because 'I'm not even trying to rebuild our relationship.' Told her there wasn't even a relationship in the first place. We fought. Big time. She called dad. He tried to lecture me we ended up having an even bigger fight. Haven't talked to either one of them since."

"They called your grandmother to talk you," he figured.

"Yeah," she answered. "He reached out to Nana because he knew I wouldn't ignore her if she called."

"What are you going to do now?" he wondered.

She inhaled deeply and let the breath out slowly.

"You're not gonna keep on ignoring them, are you?"

"I have no interest in talking to them."

"Beca, they might be _bad_ parents but they're still _your parents._ You can't just cut them out of your life. Yes, they treated you like shit for most of your life but your mother is trying to fix things, isn't she?" He paused and watched her nod curtly. "Give her a shot."

"It's not easy to just let her come into my life and act like she's been there the whole time."

"Then let her know that… without fighting. Talk things through with _both_ of your parents."

She scoffed and said nothing in response.

"Is she the one you've been ghosting?" he asked, recalling the unanswered texts he saw on her phone from an Eliza.

She brought a forkful of salad to her mouth and nodded.

* * *

Boy, was he tired. Monday was his least favorite day of the week and the fact that he barely had any sleep over the weekend made going through the day even harder.

He hopped on the couch, unbuttoning his shirt and kick off his shoes, and closed his eyes briefly before he got up, when his beloved kitten Thororeo meowed, to feed his pet.

He ordered dinner and went under the shower, figuring it would help him relax because he made the error of drinking one too many cups of coffee during the day and knew how very likely he was to toss and turn throughout the night.

And, he was a hundred percent right. He couldn't fall asleep and was strongly considering giving up coffee altogether.

He got out of bed to snack and decided while in the kitchen to watch a movie. So, he fixed himself a sandwich and got himself comfortable on the couch to see what was up on Netflix.

Not even ten minutes into the movie, his phone rang.

"Beca?" he said, picking up. "Is everything okay?" he asked.

"No. Would I be calling you this late if everything was okay," she replied, her words slightly slurred.

"Why are you whispering?" He paused the movie. "Beca?"

"Sorry," she said. "It's just hitting me really hard."

"What's hitting you really hard—where are you?"

"I'm not sure, but Google maps has my back, I guess," she answered. "I left The Garage with a dude. He has some fucked up kinks and wouldn't take no for an answer."

"Did he hurt you?"

"No, no, not exactly. I excused myself to use the bathroom and locked myself up. I'm wondering if you could come pick me up? I would have called nine-one-one but I've taken E and I have been drinking sooo, yeah, can you come get me, please?" He understood then what she meant when she said that 'it' was hitting her really hard; Ecstasy.

He let out the breath he was holding. "Text me the address."

* * *

What was she thinking? Taking drugs and hooking up with a random guy? He was both angry at her and worried sick about her.

Stepping out of the car, he was ready to punch someone.

He knocked and clenched his fist. When no one came to the door, he knocked again. His heart sank as a very unpleasant thought crossed his mind. He reached into his pocket, pulled his phone and called Beca.

"Please tell me you're almost here," she said the moment she picked up.

Relieved, he spoke, "Yes, I'm at the door. I knocked and no one answered."

"Weird." She went quiet then and he heard what sounded like unlocking a door. "Beca, talk to me," he urged when he heard nothing from her in a few seconds that surely felt like longer.

"He fell asleep," she answered with a sigh.

"Well, get your stuff and get out of there!" he said, trying and failing to keep his calm.

"I'm coming, don't yell at me," she whispered, annoyed with his tone.

"Sorry." He rubbed his temples, not sure if she heard it because she hung up on him.

She came out of the house shortly after that. It took him half a second to notice the cut on her bottom lip. He cupped her face to make sure he wasn't mistaken.

"Did he hurt you anywhere _else_?" he asked, dropping his hand and clenching it.

"He didn't hurt me. He asked before he could do this." She pointed at her lip. "It got weird after that… Can we just leave?" She rubbed her forehead, he assumed she was finally coming down the drug she took.

He nodded and took her hand, noticing that she was having trouble walking.

"Thanks for showing up," she grumbled. He made a sound of acknowledgment in response, keeping his mouth shut because he was pretty angry at her and knew how likely she'd take it the wrong way if he said anything criticizing her reckless behavior.

She fell asleep in the car so he decided to take her back to his place instead of dropping her at campus.

* * *

"Morning." He heard her say as she stepped into the kitchen where he was leaning against the counter waiting for coffee to brew while reading the news on the New York Times app.

"Good morning," he said, looking up from his cellphone. She looked…in pain. "How are you holding up?" he asked, placing his phone on the counter.

"I've had better days," she answered.

"I went and got you what you need to re-up your neurotransmitters supplies." He nodded at the drugstore bag.

"Thanks," she said, grabbing the bag and pulling the content. "Um, how much do I take?"

He sighed, getting from the way she was carefully reading the labels that it wasn't familiar any of them.

"Depends on how much Ecstasy you took," he replied.

"Just one pill."

"One from each should do," he told her. "Drink a lot of fluids throughout the day… no liquor, though."

He grabbed a mug once the coffee was done brewing and moved aside when Beca reached to grab a glass which she filled with tap water to take the pills he got for her.

"Sorry for waking you up in the middle of the night," she apologized as Jesse pulled a pitcher from the fridge and filled a glass of orange juice.

"You didn't wake me up. I was up watching a movie." He held the glass in her direction. "It's fresh, I just didn't know where you'd wake up." His eyes fell on her now swollen lip, he looked up when she touched the cut.

"I haven't looked in the mirror, is it bad?"

He took too long before he shook his head.

"I'll take that as a yes." She took a sip of juice while she rubbed her temples.

"You said he had your consent or else I would have made sure his whole face got swollen," he mumbled before he took a sip of coffee.

"I didn't think he's gonna try to bite my lip off," she spoke in annoyance.

"You mentioned that he has fucked up kinks, what did he want to do?" He was a little amused with her annoyance.

"He gets off from inflicting pain. When he told me I figured why not…"

"Were you already tripping when you made that decision?" he tried to keep his tone light as he spoke because he wasn't going to judge her. Yes, he thought she was being reckless but he wasn't going to lecture her, he was once nineteen too.

"Yeah, well, lesson learned. Don't agree to try out new _things_ with complete strangers while you're on drugs."

"Glad to hear that." He looked at the time on his watch, he still had some time to spear before hitting the road. "So, does any of this have anything to do with your parents?" he carefully asked. She was clearly acting out, he didn't have to be a specialist to recognize this type of behavior and the reason behind it.

"I get it, you went out to clear your mind because your 'family drama' is all you've been thinking of and it's frustrating. Things just happened to _escalate_."

"She's in town, Jesse," she mumbled, running a finger around the edge of the glass. "My parents showed up at my dorm yesterday."

"You guys fought again?"

"No," she put the glass of orange juice. "I wasn't there when they came. Kimmy Jin told me that my parents came looking for me."

"Ignoring them isn't really working, huh?" He drummed his fingers on the mug of coffee he was holding. "Seems to me that confronting them is your best option, Becs." He took one final sip of coffee and went to wash it.

Glancing at her, he saw her rub her temples. "You're very welcome to hide out here for as long as you want but I really think you should talk to your parents. Or at least let them know you're okay and aren't in trouble."

She nodded at his words while she fixated on the floor.

"While you're here feed Thoroero, would you?" He grabbed his blazer and wore it.

"Yeah, sure." She ran a hand through her hair.

* * *

She didn't take his advice and he wasn't surprised. He could very much invite her parents over to his place and force her into talking to them but that wasn't right. It would only make things worse. He wanted her to realize on her own that what she was doing was wrong and make the right calls.

He believed in her to make the right decision.

It took her a week however before she started leaning towards the idea of confronting her parents and he couldn't be more thrilled because he was seriously running out of excuses to avoid having sex with her.

He couldn't tell her why he was avoiding sleeping with her because she needed a friend—if she knew he had feelings for her, odds were she'd give him the same treatment she was giving her parents.

"Well, you can ask them to come over here," he suggested when she told him she didn't want to meet them at her father's house because the last thing she wanted was Sheila witnessing the inevitable fight nor did she want to meet them in a public place.

"I don't mind." He actually wanted to be around to play the role of the peacekeeper.

"No, I couldn't ask that from you." She shook her head. "You've done enough for me already."

"Oh, you mean letting you stay over?" He picked up the plates they dined in and put them in the sink. "You're awesome to live with." He had someone to talk to about his day and eat dinner with, it sounded pathetic even in his head so he kept it to himself.

"Just arrange something with your parents and let me know." He tilted his head to look at her as she got rid of the beer cans they had with their dinner.

"Okay," she replied.

"Did you go see the Bellas?" he wondered, recalling that she received a text from a Barden Bella telling her that they were back in competition.

"Yep." She leaned against the counter.

"And, how did things go?" When they talked about it, she admitted that she liked the girls and wanted back on the team.

"I apologized and asked if they could let me back on the team. They surprisingly took me back," she informed. "They're even going to let me arrange the set for the finals."

"That's awesome, Beca." He grinned, guessing that working things through with the Bellas was why she wasn't so against talking to her parents.

"Hey, weirdo?" He heard her call and as he dried his hands after washing the plates. "Is everything okay?"

"M'yeah." He shrugged.

"I'm sorry, it's just that whenever I ask if we could have sex you say no. I read online that depression lowers sex drive, should I worry about you?"

"While my mental health isn't at its best, no, I'm not depressed," he told her. "I'm just stressed out," he wasn't lying but it wasn't exactly why he wasn't boning her. "Work is stressful." He ran his fingers through his hair.

"Wanna talk about it?" She followed him to the living area.

He picked up Thororeo and sat down on the couch while petting the animal. "I might be up for a promotion in the near future."

"Well, that's great, right?" She sat next to him.

"It should be." He paused. "My career is very safe and I'm making money—"

"—but you don't like it."

He nodded. "I sometimes think about quitting but then if I do quit I would lose financial stability."

"And be happy," she finished for him.

"Happy but broke," he corrected. "I talked about this with my therapist. She suggested I find a hobby. Been thinking about offering free music lessons to kids whose parents have low income and can't afford it."

"That seems like fun," she said, sounding very genuine which was very unlike her.

He looked down at her hand when she placed it on his thigh. He could feel the sexual tension between them rise when she met his gaze. It was really hard not to give into the temptation but conscience wouldn't let him do it.

She withdrew her hand and welcomed Thororeo onto her lap, giving the kitten her attention, while he grabbed the remote control and started looking through TV channels.

"Do you wanna stop the whole thing?" He heard her ask and tilted his head.

Noting his confusion, she said, "Our thing, do you want to call it off?" She scratched the kitten's chin, waiting for him to answer. "You seem so uncomfortable right now and I hate to think that it's because of me. Dude, you're not my boyfriend, don't feel weird about not wanting me," she continued when he just stared at her. "I won't take it personally."

All he had to do was say yes and maybe nod his head. Why it was taking him forever to do that was beyond him.

"It's not you, Beca." _'That wasn't yes. Just say yes, moron,'_ he thought to himself. "I think you're very attractive." He frowned when she let out a small chuckle.

"You sound like you're breaking up with me," she explained the reason she found what he was saying funny. "Dude, it's really okay. This whole experience has been great but everything ends." She let the cat hop off her lap and watched it walk away before she tilted her head to look at him.

He nodded his head, thinking if he should come clean and deciding she didn't have to know. "It really has been great," he finally said, mustarding a smile.

"Just focus on yourself and be happy."

He could feel her initial surprise when he enveloped her in a hug because she tensed up briefly before hugging him back. "Thanks, Becs," he mumbled, placing a kiss on her head.

Jesse had spent a week wondering how he was going to tell her that they had to end their _thing_ and finally ending it on a such a good note felt strange. She made it easy but at the same time difficult because he was ready to lose her once he let her know he felt. He didn't know if he could move past the feelings he had for her and maintain a friendship with her. Well, deep down he knew that, right now, it was unlikely he could which meant he was going to pull a Beca Michell on Beca Mitchell.

 _'Oh, the irony,'_ he thought as he broke the hug.

* * *

 **AN:** Welp, here's this. Let me know what you think of the turn the story took.

Happy new year, peeps!


	10. Chapter 10

Jesse forgot what's like to do things on impulse and had decided now that he was standing in front of his older sister's apartment that not thinking too hard before he called in sick and booked the first flight he found to go see her was definitely a good decision.

"Jesse, what are you doing here?" Sarah questioned in surprise.

"You can't expect me to listen to all the voicemails you left me and not hop on the first flight I found to see you," he told her as he embraced her in his arms, hugging her tightly.

"Dude, you shouldn't have come down here, you could have just called back," she mumbled, burying her face in his chest.

He sighed, resting his chin on her head. "Well, I've been looking for an excuse to visit the big apple."

"Come on in, Jess," she mumbled, breaking the hug and stepping into her apartment.

He closed the door behind him and looked around his big sister's one-bedroom tidy apartment. There was a pile of paper on the coffee table, students' paper to grade Jesse assumed. "Working?" he guessed.

"Yep," she answered, heading the kitchen. "It's just some essays that need grading." Yep, he guessed right. "Want something to drink?" She picked up an empty bag of ships from the coffee table.

"Yeah, sure." He watched her head to towards the kitchen.

"It's Friday night, surely the essays can wait." He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he followed her.

"They can." He heard her agree. "I just don't feel like doing anything tonight, I figured I'd work for a while." She dropped the bag in the garbage can.

He leaned against the wall watching his sister open the fridge.

"I don't remember what I talk to you about last night," she confessed, shutting the fridge with her foot after she pulled a beer.

"I'm not surprised. I could barely understand what you were saying for the majority of the voicemails." He took the beer from her. "What's wrong?" he questioned, deciding to get right into it.

He could piece it together from what she had told him on the voicemails she left but he wanted to hear it from her and get to the bottom of things before the weekend ended.

"More like what isn't wrong," she scoffed, leaning against the counter. "Ever feel so fucking lonely despite being surrounded by people?" she went on to add after a few seconds of silence.

"Every fucking day," he chuckled humorlessly.

She frowned meeting his gaze.

He was pleased with the front he put to keep his family from knowing about the state of his mental health, which he knew wasn't the right thing to do. He was well aware of the importance of having his family as a support system, he just didn't want them to worry. He was always the happiest most optimist one of the Swansons: he didn't want to shake that image. He was battling his demons, working through his issues one-step at a time with the help of his therapist.

"But I try not let it get to me 'cause I know that it's not true," he told her. "And, you do, too." He smiled curtly when she nodded and pulled her into a hug.

"You're not alone, Sarah," he said before he placed a kiss on her head, rubbing her back when she tightened her hold. He could feel her roll her eyes when he began to sing No One Is Alone from Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods under his breath.

"Tell me," he said, pulling his head back. "What's gotten you feeling all lonely?" he wondered.

She shrugged. "I don't know." She paused. "Kelly left, that could be it… I don't know," she grumbled. "We didn't even fight or anything, we just came to terms with the fact that we don't want the same things and should probably end things for good. Like, she told me she wants to have a baby and I'm so not down to be a mother."

"When did you guys break things off?" he wanted to know, loosening his hold.

"Like a week after your birthday," she answered.

"Do you miss her?" He knew she would but he just wanted to know if she missed her because she still had strong feelings towards her ex-girlfriend.

"Of course, I miss her." She sighed.

"You know, I'm surprised it's me you called and not her last night," he told her as she pulled away from him completely and wrapped her arms around herself.

"I deleted her phone number and couldn't remember it." She glared at him when he chuckled.

"Sorry," he apologized, bringing the beer to his lips.

* * *

 _Two hours later._

Jesse was waiting for his sister to finish getting ready because they decided to go out. He listened attentively to his sister's rambles and offered advice when she got to the rough stuff that was behind the way she was feeling then talked her into going out and socializing when she admitted that she hadn't stepped outside of her apartment for another reason than work for about two weeks.

"What are you looking for?" He heard Sarah ask as he looked inside the fridge.

"We should eat something before heading out," he told his sister, pulling his head to look at her. "Except there isn't anything in here we could eat."

"There's a couple of bananas I think, we can eat those," she told him as she rested her forearms on the counter.

"They do not look edible." He pulled the four bottles of wine that all had some wine left in them. "Why do you have so many empty red wine bottles in your refrigerator?"

"They're not empty," she retorted, picking up his phone that was on the counter when it chimed with a text.

"Actually they are." He moved the sink, planning to rinse the empty bottles to put them later in a recycling bin.

"Beca texted an attachment, fingers crossed it's NSFW," Sarah sighed, crossing her fingers before she swiped to unlock her bother's phone.

"What did she send?" He titled his head and saw for himself when Sarah held his phone his way.

He chuckled seeing that Beca sent him a photo flipping off a poster of the latest Nicholas Sparks movie.

"I haven't seen this one," Sarah told him as she turned his phone away from him to scroll up their conversation. "I take that it's horrible?"

"It's not horrible. Beca hated it when we went to see it. I thought it was alright." He shrugged.

"You and your fuckbuddy go on movie dates?" Sarah arched an eyebrow.

"Um, we don't do that anymore," he informed.

"When did you stop?" she wanted to know.

"We ended it like a week after my birthday."

"And you still hang out?"

"Well, not really. Haven't had time to hang out."

He started offering lessons like he told Beca he planned to do which was filling his time and making him hate his day job less.

And, since she had sacked up and spoke to her parents and worked things out with them (sort of) Beca decided to stay in college (for now) therefore she was beyond busy trying to save the semester and get ready for the ICCAs (the latter mainly but she had put some effort into the few classes she was taking.)

"You sure text a lot, though. You basically went from sex friends to text friends."

"Yeah," he chuckled. "Basically," he agreed, drying his hands.

He tried to give Beca Mitchell the Beca Mitchell treatment… keyword; tried. He tried and failed. Jesse could not ghost her, he could not ignore her when she texted asking for advice—advice she wouldn't apply, he really didn't get why she kept coming to him for advice when she never took it.

He figured that she just wanted to get things off her chest and was there to listen, what he had to say didn't really matter.

"What are you doing?" he asked as he watched his sister type into his phone.

"Relax, I won't ask for nudes from your buddy," she mumbled.

"That wasn't my concern but now it is." He moved around the counter and leaned in to see what Sarah was doing.

Sarah: _'Bet you're just jelly it's not you Josh Duhamel is about to kiss.'_

Beca: _'Jelly? Yeah, definitely not Jelly.'_

Sarah: _'Josh Duhamel is quite the hottie, are you sure you're into dudes?'_

Beca: _'You of all people should know how into dudes I am.'_

Sarah: _'You could be into both. You wouldn't know until you've tried. Besides, you're in college, you're supposed to experiment in college.'_

Beca: _'I'm having a strange déja vù right now 'cause dad gave me this speech except it was about college experience as a whole.'_

Jesse rolled his eyes once he saw the exchange between his sister and Beca and took his phone from Sarah.

"Hey, I was typing," she complained.

"I'm aware." He deleted what she had typed without even reading it.

Jesse: _'Sorry that was Sarah texting you. She thinks it's her moral obligation to get everyone to have at least one same-sex hook up because you can't be 100% hetro if you never tried to homo.'_

Beca: _'I see her point. Also, speaking of same-sex encounters, have you had any? Also, also, your sister is in town?'_

Jesse: _'I haven't and do not intend to. I'm actually visiting her.'_

Beca: _'What about just kissing another dude in New Year or something?'_

Jesse: _'Nope, never.'_

"If you're gonna spend the night texting your friend let's just order some food and stay in," Sarah suggested.

"No, we're not staying in." He shoved his phone into his pocket after telling Beca about his plans with his sister.

* * *

"Give me that," Sarah grumbled, reaching over to take Jesse's phone from his hand. "You can't text all night and ignore me. It's rude and very annoying since you're the one that insisted on going on." She tossed his phone into her bag.

"Sorry." He ran a hand through his hair. "Beca was just asking me about which subway to take to get back to where she's staying."

"Subway?" Sarah arched an eyebrow. "Your friend is in New York, too?"

He nodded. "She's competing in the ICCAs which are tomorrow. She and her teammates went out tonight to explore the city since most of them have never been."

"Why didn't you ask her and her friends to come join us?"

"Beca doesn't know I'm in New York."

"Why not?"

He shrugged. "No particular reason."

"Bullshit. Wait, is it because you don't want to go watch her compete at the ICCAs?" she guessed.

"No."

"I'd love to go see a bunch of nerds sing a cappella," she told him and watched the way he shifted in discomfort. "Just tell me why you don't want to go watch the ICCAs, please?"

"I may or may not have developed a crush on her. I don't want to see her until I'm certain I'm no longer crushing on her."

"I knew you had feelings for your fuckbuddy!" Sarah exclaimed.

"It's just a silly crush." He reached for his beer and took a sip.

"You're avoiding her. It is most definitely not just a silly crush."

"It is. And, it'll never be more than a stupid crush," he firmly told her to which she frowned.

"Why, because you're a decade older than her?"

"It's not the age gap, it's her age. She's nineteen. She has _a lot_ to learn from experiences, from mistakes, from _life_. We fooled around for a while and we moved on. I refuse to stand in her way." He was fine becoming a part of her past.

"Your logic is weird."

"It makes sense to me." He shrugged.

"You can go back to avoiding her after the ICCAs because we're going, baby brother."

"You go, I won't."

"You're going to support your friend."

"Am not."

"Jesse, we both know you can't not go. You're _you_."

"I'm taking the day off from myself tomorrow." She found herself rolling her eyes at his words.

* * *

He ended up going because being persistence is a Swanson thing, his sister would have dragged him if he didn't agree to go with her willingly.

They found seats on the third row and Jesse was able to spot a couple familiar faces there; Benji and Dr. Mitchell.

When the Bellas took the stage, he held his breath eyeing Beca. He internally groaned recognizing the feeling that washed over him and tried not to focus on it.

"Go, Beca!" Sarah hollered, catching Beca's attention who instantly found the source.

He wanted to physically hurt his sister for making his presence known to Beca but instead just smiled at the surprised brunette on the stage when he met her gaze.

When she smirked and met his gaze mid-performance, he arched an eyebrow in anticipation because he could tell just from her facial experience that she had something up her sleeves then shook his head in amusement when she began singing _Don't You_ by _Simple Minds_.

They made out his couch then decided to hook up with no strings attached the last time he heard that song. If he didn't know better he would have thought she was serenading him because she wouldn't look away from his gaze. She couldn't be doing such thing of course. _Don't You_ is a good song and she had him to thank for exposing her to it.

He threw his fist in the air when he noticed that she was waiting for him to do so and grinned when she threw hers in the air as well.

He could hear his sister mumble something next to him and could feel some eyes on him but he was preoccupied to figure out what Sarah was saying or give a fuck about those who were looking at him.

The Barden Bellas knocked it out of the park, and from his experience doing a cappella, he knew that their set was a winner. (The fact she used the song made famous by his all-time favorite movie _wasn't_ in any way making him bias.)

He went to find her after the jury declared the Bellas winners and people began leaving the theatre. She was with her teammates, but when she saw him and Sarah walk towards her she excused herself and met them halfway.

"Why didn't you tell me you're coming?" she asked.

"I know you _hate_ surprises so I figured I'd surprise you." He chuckled when she threw a weak punch that landed on his shoulder. He responded by wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her into his chest, hugging her quite tightly.

"Congrats, Beca, you guys killed it," Sarah said.

"Thanks," she grinned, her arm loosely wrapped around Jesse's waist as she leaned against him.

"So, care to explain why you decided to include a song made famous by a movie into your set, miss I-don't-like-movies?" he questioned.

She shrugged. "I found the soundtrack at the radio station and listened to it. ' _Don't You_ ' is pretty catchy and you made it quite clear that the ending of the movie is iconic therefore people would be all over it if I put it in our set," Beca explained.

He nodded in response, smiling down at her. "You basically figured you'd manipulate the audience by hitting them with a strong dose of nostalgia."

"The jury in particular because they are who decide who wins." Her words made him snort.

"Beca." The three tilted their heads, hearing Dr. Mitchell's voice.

Jesse pulled away from Beca completely as her father approach them accompanied by a familiar looking woman. It soon clicked in Jesse's head, figuring that she was Beca's mother Eliza.

"Beca, to say your team was amazing would be an understatement," the woman spoke, revealing her foreign accent that made Jesse wonder why Beca never mentioned the fact that her mother's Australian.

"Yeah, you really took the stage by storm," Dr. Mitchell beamed at his daughter before looking at Jesse. "Swanson," he called.

"Dr. Mitchell." Jesse smiled curtly at the older man who was eyeing Sarah whose eyes were glued to Eliza.

"Beca, aren't you going to introduce your friends?" Eliza questioned.

"Right," Beca nodded. "Eh, my friend Jesse," she gestured at Jesse. "His sister Sarah." She then gestured at Sarah. "My parents." She awkwardly motioned between the siblings and her parents.

Beca surely looked a lot like her mother, they still had a fair amount of different features but it was easy to tell that they're related.

"Pleasure meeting you," Jesse smiled, wondering if he should add ma'am then deciding not to because if he did his math right Beca's mother was barely a decade older than him and it'll probably offend her.

"Likewise." She shook his hand, eyeing him up and down. "So you're Jesse, huh?"

"Yep." He didn't know Beca told her mother about him. He wondered how much she told her. He did miss it when she raised an eyebrow the moment Beca introduced him and it made him worry slightly.

"I'm sure you get this all of the time but I gotta say you and Beca look like you could be sisters, not mother and daughter," Sarah marveled and was met by a soft laugh from the woman.

"You're too sweet," Eliza smiled curtly.

"Seriously, you don't look a day over thirty." Jesse wanted to roll his eyes because of his sister's flirty tone. While what she was saying was true, Beca's mother was indeed gorgeous and was aging really well, it didn't mean it was okay for his sister to flirt with the woman.

He decided to step in before she said something inappropriate, "Beca, how do you plan to celebrate the fact that the Barden Bellas made history tonight as the first all-female group to ever win the ICCAs?"

"The girls told me there's an after-party at the hotel where a cappella nerds are staying and since we won the other teams are going to foot the bill for our drinks," she informed.

"That's how it's always been." During his days as a Treblemaker, he never paid for a drink; the trebles were the kings of A cappella. "But you guys made history," he pointed out, smiling when Dr. Mitchell wrapped an arm around Beca's shoulder and pulled her into his side as he pecked her temples. His former professor was very proud of his daughter; it was nice to witness it.

"You know what, Becs," Dr. Mitchell began to say as he stuffed his hand into his pocket and pulled his wallet. "Here." He handed her a credit card. "Tonight is your night. Spend as much as you want."

" _Seriously_?"

"Yes, seriously." He nodded. "Rent a yacht and throw a party on it for all I care. Just don't end up in a jail cell by the end of the night," he joked to which Beca rolled her eyes while she fought off a smile.

"What your father is trying to say is don't do anything stupid," Eliza said, a little uncomfortable with the level of trust Dr. Mitchell had in Beca which was understandable—who in their right mind gave a 19-year-old unlimited access to their bank account?

"Don't worry," Beca assured her, smiling tightly at her mother. "Thanks, dad." She leaned up and kissed him on the cheek.

The look on Dr. Mitchell's face warmed Jesse's heart. He knew Beca didn't do that usually. He was beyond happy that their relationship was growing and hoped Beca's relationship with her mother would get better, too.

The mother and daughter still had a lot to work through; they were taking slow but steady steps.

Once Beca left to join her friends, the four parted ways awkwardly. Jesse had to pull Sarah away because she was starting to drool over Eliza. Eliza was looking at him weirdly. Dr. Mitchell seemed uncomfortable by the amount of staring and Jesse shared his discomfort.

* * *

"How old is Beca's mother?" Sarah asked as she and Jesse walked towards the entrance of the theatre.

"Forty," he told her.

"Damn, she's aging well," she murmured then frowned at the glare her brother shot her. "What?"

"Did you have to eye-fuck the woman?" Jesse grumbled as he his and his sister stood on the sidewalk waiting for a taxi.

"I can't help it, she's really hot! Besides, you know me and ladies with accents." Sarah shrugged. "And, don't you dare lecture me on eye-fucking you did plenty of that yourself tonight." He looked at her in confusion after whistling for a cab to stop.

"Oh, don't give me that look. You and your former fuck budd were practically undressing each other while she serenaded you. Dude, you made people sitting near you uncomfortable."

"That wasn't the case at all," he denied.

"That was very much the case. And, you can't pretend it's just a crush because it's not and it's not one-sided either." She stepped into the taxi first. "I thought she was going to kiss you when you hugged her…" she paused to give the taxi driver her address. "…that's how obvious that she's into you."

He decided to ignore what she said because it didn't matter even if it was true.

"Also, serenading you with your favorite song?" she snorted. "I didn't peg Beca as the big gesture type. It's cute but doesn't seem like her thing."

"She doesn't know it's my favorite song," he told her. "And, stop saying she serenaded me. You heard yourself why she went with the song."

"Whatever, man." She rolled her eyes.

Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, Jesse pulled it and found a text from Beca wondering he would join her and the Bellas and told him to bring his sister if she wanted to tag along.

His instinct was to agree right away but he knew he shouldn't be hanging out with Beca. Sarah was right it wasn't a silly crush and tonight confirmed it. He blew a breath, typed a reply and sent it out before changing his mind, telling her that he was a little tired and that his fight was early.

He had to do something drastic since it wasn't just him, he could deny it all he wanted but it was mutual even if Beca didn't seem to see it. He could imagine why she wouldn't: she was never in a relationship and never developed feelings for another person before, therefore, the whole thing was new to her.

"Hey, Sarah," he called, tilting his head to look at his sister who was gazing out of the window. "Remember how we decided that once I turned eighteen we'd go backpacking across the country? What happened to that?"

"Wow, you were like fourteen when we made that decision," she recalled. "Ugh, this makes me feel super old." She grimaced. "I believe we just forgot about it. What made you remember it?"

"I watched a movie where the protagonist goes backpacking."

The movie had been on his mind ever since he had seen it and the thought of going across the country with nothing but a backpack seemed very appealing given the fact that he wasn't very happy with the way his life turned out and was craving change. He wasn't brave enough to just drop everything and do it, having his sister with him would be the guarantee he needed to go through with it because Sarah Swanson never backed out of anything she agree to do.—he loved that about her and wished he had that quality.

"Wanna do it now?" he wondered.

" _Now_?" She looked at him in confusion.

"Well, not right now, obviously." He rolled his eyes. "But like in the near future. Summer break is approaching you'll get your ten weeks break. I'll go on leave. It'll be great to break the routine and meet new people."

She thought about it for a second. "Okay, fine, I'm in."

He didn't expect her to agree right away. "Awesome." He bumped his fist with Sarah's.

"I'd say we should probably check if Adam wants to join but the fucker has a pregnant wife to look after." She closed her eyes shut momentarily. "Shit, I wasn't supposed to say that."

"Adam slipped and told you, too?" he snorted.

"Yep," she affirmed.

Jesse scratched the stubble on his cheek as he thought about the adventure he had just talked his sister into and it was both scary and exciting.

* * *

AN: Hated it? Tolerated it? Let me know what you thought in a review.


	11. Chapter 11

**AN:** So, this chapter was tricky to write down because I didn't know where to start. I knew I wanted certain things to happen and I wanted to do some exposition and finding a way to jam everything into one chapter was fucking difficult. This is how it turned out. Sorry if you got bored halfway through and couldn't make it to the end. I'd love to hear your opinions, people. Thank you for dropping by. I hope you're doing alright.

Also, sorry for typos.

 _Edit:_ break lines signify a relatively long time jump whereas the /*...*/ means the events happen close in time.

* * *

Jesse stood in the restroom of a gas station in the middle of nowhere behind his sister who was bending so he could dye the hair she couldn't see.

"Jesse, it's not rocket science, just wear the fucking glove and dip your hand in the thing and put it on my hair."

"You know, you could go bold from this, right?" He was reading the instructions that his sister neglected to follow.

"No, I won't. I've dyed my hair at home plenty of times. I wouldn't have asked for your help if there were more mirrors in this place. Now, get cracking my back hurts," she complained. He grabbed the plastic glove and tried to cover all the hair she missed.

"I still don't get why you're doing this now?" He mumbled as she washed the dye off her hair.

"Because I've had it with people mistaking us for a couple. It's the worst kind of cockblocking."

"And dying your hair dark would make people stop confusing us for a couple?" he snorted.

"Hopefully." She sighed. "'Cause while we very much look alike having blonde hair tends to throw people off."

He nodded slowly as he watched her squeeze the water out of her hair as she eyed herself in the mirror. "This turned out alright," she said, pleasantly surprised with the shade of brown of her hair.

He had to agree but he was going to save his opinion until her hair was dry. "I still think you could have waited until we made it to Vegas."

Sarah really wanted to go to a casino and try her luck and Jesse didn't see a reason why they shouldn't do it—she did agree to a lot of his brilliant ideas.

He watched her run a hand through her damp hair trying to style it a certain way before taking the basketball cap he had on his head and wearing it.

They hitched a ride with a trucker headed to Las Vegas and made to Sin City late in the evening.

"Don't be cheap." Sarah glared at her brother once he handed her a dollar to put in the slot machine. He rolled his eyes and reached into his pocket to pull more change. "I'm not giving them more than three dollars," he told her as he handed her the money.

"It's people like you that give Jews a bad name," she grumbled, taking his hand and placing hers over it so they would pull the leveler together after she put the sum of money into the machine.

"Makes us rich," Sarah mumbled as she pulled the level down.

Jesse watched the symbols rapidly roll and then looked away as they slowed down only looking back when he heard the sound the slot machine made when it hit jackpot and had to blink when he saw the number seven on each of the reels.

Never in his life would have thought that a day that started with him helping his sister dye her hair in a shady gas station restroom would be the same day he and his sister would hit jackpot.

* * *

"Beca, I know you're hiding behind the bar." Beca grimaced at the voice of her friend, realizing how lazy it was to hide behind the bar and cursing herself for not picking a better hiding spot.

"I wasn't hiding," Beca said as she stood up. "I dropped my phone." She shook the phone.

"Right, well, get your arse in a bikini."

Beca groaned. "I don't wanna go, Amy. Besides, who's going to keep an eye on the bar if we both head out?" she knew she sounded like a little girl whining and didn't really care.

"Tarzan arrived for his shift, we can leave."

Beca glanced behind her friend and felt a little embarrassed for whining like a child in front of Kyle also known as Tarzan: He liked to show off his very toned and tanned physique and would walk around half naked all day long and had shoulder-length hair hence the nickname.

"Why do you hate the beach so much?" Tarzan was asking as he pulled the t-shirt that was on his shoulder and wore it. "I was just there. You could use a tan. It's disturbing how pale you are." He frowned, eyeing her.

"I. Don't. Tan," she told him what she had been telling him and everyone that told her she looked ghostly. "I get sunburn."

"Well, that's a shame." He shook his head, walking towards the bar.

"Beca, if you're not wearing a bathing suit in five minutes it won't be hard to make you," Amy warned. "I'm sure Tarzan wouldn't mind helping me."

Beca glared at Amy, who was smirking at her before she tilted her head to look at Tarzan, who had just stepped behind the bar.

"You won't do such thing," she told him.

He sucked in a deep breath. "I wouldn't mind undressing you at all actually." He winked earning an eye roll from the brunette.

"Four minutes," Amy said in sing-song.

Beca slapped his hand away when he slipped a finger under her tank top pulling it just to mess with her. "Fine," she grumbled and began making her way towards to the entrance of the bar where Fat Amy was standing.

"How much liquor will it take for you to let your inner dingo take the wheel and mate with our mate?" Amy asked, subtly nodding at the bar.

Beca made a face. "Now that you've put it that way, never." She unlocked her phone when it chimed with a text. She swiped to read it seeing that Benji sent her an attachment.

 _Benji: 'Look what I found.'_

She arched her eyebrows reading the headline of the article that Benji screen-captured.

"Holy shit," she chuckled.

"What?" Fat Amy asked, peeking to look at the screen. "Siblings win 8.58 million dollars after betting 3$ on a slot machine," she read out loud and found out for herself.

"I know the winners," Beca told her. The article was a couple of weeks old, she and Jesse hadn't been talking much, well at all really, not since the Bellas won the ICCAs, which was more than two months ago.

They hadn't been talking but it didn't mean they weren't friends anymore.

/*...*/

Things got a little crazy but nothing Jesse couldn't handle.

It was a little weird to know that their bank accounts were loaded. It was all surreal, aside from the occasional conversation about what they planned to do with the money, they didn't really discuss it.

"Thanks," he thanked the bartender who he learned her name was Amber once she placed his drink in front of him.

She smiled politely at him and went to serve another customer.

"Jess," Sarah called, nudging her brother. He tilted his head to look at her as he brought his pint of beer to his lips.

"I think she likes you," she told him.

"Who?" He furrowed his brow, placing the drink on the bar.

"Amber," she told him. "She keeps stealing glances at you. Do something about it," she urged.

He glanced at the woman behind the bar currently pouring beer into a pint and really looked at her. Okay, she was pretty.

"You've relentlessly flirted with her ever since we got here and she doesn't seem to mind it. Do you really think it's a good idea for me to hit on her?"

"She likes dude."

"She told you?" He tore his eyes away from Sarah to look at Amber yet again.

"No, I can always tell with these things. Like, a sixth sense," she explained.

"Then why waste your time?" he questioned.

"She's fun to flirt with." She shrugged.

"You got this, Tiger!" she whispered yelled, squeezing his forearm.

He scratched the itching beard that he grew during their trip and he didn't plan to shave until he was back in Atlanta—he sort of wanted to see how long it would get because he never really grew a beard.

"Where are you off to?" he asked, looking away from Amber to look at his sister when she hopped off the stool.

"I have to pee," she told him then patted his shoulder before she walked away.

He sucked in a breath and decided to give it a shot but, unlike his sister, his goal wasn't to get laid, he was fine having an interesting conversation.

"Is that a tree on your arm?" Jesse mumbled, eyeing the ink on her inner forearm he noticed.

Amber paused shortly before glancing down at the tattoo on her arm. "It's the Cedar of Lebanon," she told him.

"Does that mean you're Lebanese?" he wondered.

"Mostly," she replied. "There's some French and Italian on my mother's side."

"It's nice," he complimented, his eyes still on the tattoo.

"Thanks," she smiled at him. "Got any tattoos?" she wondered.

"Nope." He took a sip of beer. "I'm not good at making decisions where the outcome is permanent," he shared with her. "But if I were to get a tattoo it'll probably be the word _tattoo_ in a foreign language."

She let out a small laugh before she rested her forearms on the bar, leaning against it as she faced him. "Where would you get it?" she asked.

"Where do you suggest I get it?" He took a sip from his alcoholic drink as he watched Amber give it a little thought.

"Right here." She lightly poked him in the forehead.

"I can make it work." He shrugged. "But you can't really rock facial ink unless you get a teardrop, too. So, I guess I'll be getting that as well." Keeping a straight face was a little difficult when she let out a reserved laugh yet again.

"You got yourself a mustache," she told him when he caught her looking at his lips.

He used the back of his hand to wipe the foam then tilted his head to look at Sarah as she sat down next to him.

"Tequila shot and keep 'em coming, please," Sarah said as she drummed her fingers to match the beat of the song on the jukebox.

"This bar is like a men's locker room." The older Swanson sighed. "Which is why I'm gonna drown my sorrows." She shrugged. "I'm counting on you to talk me into drinking enough water."

Jesse wanted to roll his eyes because Sarah was being dramatic but he didn't, he patted her shoulder instead. "I got your back."

"Where's the closest motel?" Sarah wondered as Amber placed a shot in front of her.

"Three blocks from here, across from the gas station," Amber told her as she reached into her back pocket hearing her phone ring.

The bartender brought her phone to her ear and stepped back to speak on the phone.

Sarah grimaced swallowing the shot then tilted her head to look at her brother who was running his index around the rim of the pint. "Do you have condoms or do you want me to go buy some for you?" she spoke in a voice only Jesse could hear. "Jesse, don't look at me like that," she added when he shot her a glare. "You need protection, she's sexy as hell but STIs aren't _._ "

He glanced at Amber then did a double take once he saw the hard expression on her face. Sarah followed his gaze. "Is everything okay?" Sarah was the one to ask once Amber hung up and cursed under breath.

"No," she replied, resting her hand on the bar while she ran a hand through her hair. "I have to be somewhere but I can leave the bar, I'm supposed to close."

"Can't you just tell your boss you have an emergency?" Sarah questioned, Amber didn't say it but it was clearly an emergency.

Amber shook her head.

"Well, is there something we can do to help?" Jesse wondered.

"No, thank you." She looked down her phone and it wasn't long until she brought it to her ear. Soon, she was talking to on the phone and five minutes later a woman they learned her name was Emma stepped into the bar to cover for Amber.

"So, what are you doing in town?" Jesse heard Emma ask his sister whom he had convinced should replace Tequila with water not too long ago.—she was flirting with the bartender and liquor was making her choice of word not very appropriate.

"My brother and I are backpacking across the country," Sarah informed, nodding at Jesse. "We started off in Georgia and so far been to Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, California, Oregon, Washington, and now Idaho."

"How long have you been on the road?" Emma wondered.

"Two months," Sarah answered.

They wouldn't be able to cover all the states but they sure planned to visit the states they had never visited and wanted to check out.

Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, Jesse pulled it surprised to see that Beca texted him. He swiped to unlock it and reply to her text message.

 _Beca: 'How many unnecessary things did you buy so far, Mr. Millionaire?'_

 _Jesse: 'I'm offended that you think I'll buy stuff impulsively now that I can. Financial analyst, remember?'_

 _Beca: 'Right, you are a Jew*. My bad.'_

 _Jesse: 'Tiny racist snuggle bunny is your newest nickname.'_

 _Beca: 'Fuck off.'_

Jesse snorted reading her reply before sending out a text.

 _Jesse: 'How did you know?'_

He had just hit send when Amber got back and wasn't alone, she a child with her.

 _Beca: 'Benji showed me an article he came across about your big win. What were you and Sarah doing in Las Vegas?'_

"Get behind the bar," Amber was telling the girl she brought with her.

Jesse looked up from his phone and watched the kid do what Amber asked her to do then watched Amber step out of the bar again.

He got up after her when he heard a car pull over in front of the bar followed by the sound of a very violent slam of the door. He wouldn't have gone to see what was up if he didn't hear yelling as well.

It was hard to follow what the man that was yelling at Amber about but it was very clear that he was up to no good. Jesse didn't want to physically make the man leave but when he saw that he was about to lay his hand on Amber he immediately rushed to stop him.

"What do you think you're doing?" Jesse asked, tightening his grip on the other man's forearm before he pushed him away.

Jesse wasn't fond of violence and avoided it at all costs, he really didn't want to fight and hoped that talking it through would do it.

"Who the fuck are you?" He pushed Jesse in the chest.

"Just leave us alone, Chad," Amber pleaded.

"Why, so you'd fuck Jim?" He let out a humorless laugh. "Reed told me! Well, guess what, bitch? Not on my watch."

"Oh my fucking god!" she exclaimed. "We broke up six months ago. You left us, remember?"

"I'm your daughter's father." He stepped forward again and bumped into Jesse who stood right in front of Amber. "My daughter who you won't let me see," he said behind greeted teeth.

"Oh, now she's your daughter? If I remember correctly the night you left you said something about me being a cheating whore who's forcing you to raise someone else's kid."

"I wasn't thinking right when I said that." He paused, glancing at Jesse. "Let's just go home and sort things out in private."

"If you want to see Theresa, we can figure something out when you're sober. But, we're done, Chad."

Jesse kept his guard up and was ready to react accordingly when he saw the way Chad tensed up.

"This isn't over," he said, stepping back.

"He really shouldn't be driving," Jesse commented watching Chad start his truck.

"He'll be fine," Amber mumbled, rubbing her temples. "Um, thank you," she said meeting his gaze.

Jesse nodded curtly and followed her back into the bar.

/*...*/

"Beca," Tarzan yawned, stretching on the bed. "Are you leaving?" He rubbed his eyes as Beca slipped on her shorts.

"Yep." Beca picked up her t-shirt and was about to wear it when her phone chimed with a text. She went to grab it from the nightstand where it was charging.

 _Jesse: 'Backpacking across the country. Vegas was a stop.'_

 _Beca: 'Are you still on the road?'_

 _Jesse: 'Yep. Should be back in Atlanta in a couple of weeks.'_

Beca glanced at Tarzan when she felt his eyes on her: she wouldn't hear the end of it if Fat Amy knew that she had been hooking up with the bartender that worked at the bar owned by Fat Amy's family the whole summer.

"Why not stay over?" he asked. "It's late," he added, noting that it was midnight.

"I have to pack," she answered.

 _Jesse: 'What you doing up? It's pretty early for you.'_

"Can't you pack in the morning like a normal person?" he yawned, pushing himself up, then climbed out of bed.

Beca checked him out as he wore his boxers.

"It takes me forever to get my sleeping on track when I stay here which is why I'm tricking my body into thinking I'm back in the States before I even get there."

"What time is it in America?" he asked as he walked into the en-suite bathroom attached to her bedroom.

"It's eight AM Eastern Standard Time," she sighed.

 _Beca: 'It's actually midnight where I am.'_

 _Jesse: 'You're Down Under?'_

 _Beca: 'Yep. I've spent most of the summer here but I should be on American soil in a couple of days.'_

"When is your flight?" She heard Tarzan ask as he walked back inside the room.

"Eleven-fifty," she answered.

"I'm going to miss you," he sighed, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her towards him.

"No, you won't," she mumbled, tilting her head to give him better access to her neck. "In fact, you will forget all about me in like a week tops." She looked at phone feeling it vibrate in her hand.

 _Jesse: 'Spending quality time with your mom?'_

 _Beca: 'Among other things.'_

 _Jesse: 'Such as going to the beach, riding kangaroos and trying not to get bitten by some venous bug?'_

"Hey, I was using that," she complained when Tarzan took her phone her hand and put it on the nightstand.

"You're wrong, you know?" he was saying as he picked her up and sat her on the bed. "You're unlike any girl I've ever met, I won't forget about you." He climbed on top of her.

"And you're a really hot dude that rarely ever gets put in his place." She ran a hand up his torso as he nuzzled her cheek. She tried to destroy his confidence at every possible occasion because he was too confident and needed someone to bust his balls and he was very into it.

"Dude, stop staring, it's weird." She playfully slapped him. "Either _do_ something or move so I can leave."

He smiled at her then leaned in, kissing her. "Tell me, why did you move to America?" he asked, pulling away to bury his face in her neck.

"That's one random question," she mumbled, running her fingers up his back before then resting a hand on the back of his neck.

"We never really talk. You just insult me then have sex with me." He moved from her neck and placed kisses along her jawline before he found her lips, pecking them. "You're leaving tomorrow so we're going to get to know each other tonight."

"Seriously?" she asked in disbelief to which he nodded.

"Yeah, I'm gonna leave now." She tried to push him off of her but couldn't for obvious reasons.

"If you don't want to answer that particular question, here's another one." He paused. "You and Amy, how did you become friends?" he asked, tucking her hair behind her ear and ignoring the death glares she was shooting him.

"She scared off a group of kids that wouldn't let me play on the slides when we were four," she fondly recalled. "Then told me she picked me to be her best friend. I said okay, assuming that's how friendships work because I didn't have friends."

"Aw, now I wanna see what you looked like when you were four," he smiled, rolling off of her then pulling her into his side, his smile growing bigger when she snuggled up to him. "How did you maintain your friendship when you left to live in America?" he wanted to know.

She closed her eyes once he started stroking her hair. "It's not like we grew up in the Middle Ages and couldn't keep touch. Besides, I visited." Beca looked forward to visiting her mother in Australia solely because she'd get to hang out with Fat Amy.

"Must be cool that she got accepted to the college you go to." He looked at her when she hummed in response.

"Beca, are you falling asleep?" he asked.

"No," she replied.

"You're definitely falling asleep." He chuckled. "What about your genius technique to avoid jet lag?"

She groaned and opened her eyes.

"Who's dropping you off at the airport tomorrow?" he wanted to know.

"Mom." She paused to yawn. "I really need to leave. I haven't packed a single thing."

"Your flight isn't until noon, you'll have plenty of time in the morning," he reasoned. "I'll come and help."

"No, Amy might drop by."

"Remind me again why we're keeping our relationship a secret from Amy."

"This." She motioned between them. "Isn't a relationship." He frowned in response. "You said it yourself 'I insult you then fuck you' how is that a relationship?"

"It's not a very healthy relationship but it's still a relationship." He shrugged to which she rolled her eyes.

"Fat Amy will relentlessly make raunchy jokes which I'd rather not hear," she answered his question and sat up.

"I like her jokes. They're quite hilarious." He rested his weight on his elbows.

"You won't find them that funny if you had to sit next to her on a fourteen hours flight," Beca mumbled before pausing to yawn again.

"You're too tired to pull an all-nighter." He noted. "Let me fix you a cup of coffee, it might help."

"Thanks." She watched him get up and took his hand when he extended it.

/*...*/

Jesse took a hesitant sip of coffee, fearing it would burn his tongue, and was glad it didn't taste like shit despite its cheapness. He scratched his beard as he looked through the available newspaper on the counter of the small diner, enjoying the quietness.

"Jimmy, I barely slept last night and need to feel alive, do something." Jesse glanced up hearing the familiar voice of Amber.

"You got it, A," Jimmy replied. "Want something to eat with it?"

"Uh, I'll have a cupcake or bagel." She shrugged and sat down.

"Would doughnuts work?" Jimmy ask.

"Sure," she nodded.

"Morning," Jesse greeted gaining her attention.

"Good morning," she said back, lifting her sunglasses over her hair. "You're still in town," she noted.

Sarah left with Emma and wasn't up yet. He couldn't exactly go anywhere without her nor could him barge into her room and wake her up when she had Emma over.

"Should hit the road by noon," he informed as he brought the coffee to his lips. "I overheard you saying you barely slept, is everything okay?"

"Chad didn't come back if that's what you want to know," she mumbled. "I just couldn't sleep." She sucked in a breath.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asked. "I'm a good listener."

She took some time before she spoke. "I don't think it's good for Theresa to be in the middle of everything going between her father and I. So after a night of thinking I decided to send her to stay with my sister."

"Why send her away? Why not move, too?"

"I can't move."

"What's stopping you if you don't mind me asking?"

"Thanks," she smiled at Jimmy when he placed a large cup of coffee in front of her.

"Chad got into a car accident and both he and Tree had to get surgeries. Amber is stuck with the medical bills since the asshole decided to bail," Jimmy answered for her and received a glare for oversharing. "Life here is pretty cheap so saving up money should take less time than it would if A lived somewhere expensive."

"How much debt do you have?" Jesse carefully asked.

"Around fifty K, right, A?" Jimmy answered yet again oblivious to Amber's annoyance with him.

Jesse wanted to help. It felt weird, though, he didn't know how to offer to help and not sound like a jackass.

"I can loan you fifty thousand dollars," he finally said, failing to find the appropriate words to tell her that he could give her the money. "Interest-free," he quickly added.

"In return for what?" she countered.

"I won't ask for anything from you but I hope you'd either pack for two or just stay here. Separation wouldn't good either one of you." He sipped his coffee.

"The loan, over how many months will I have to pay it back?" she asked after giving it some thought.

He took a moment to the mental math before he gave her an answer. "Would 833 bucks for five years work for you?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

/*...*/

Beca was really tired and was doubting her ability to go through with her plan. It was still early when she walked into the house, her mother wasn't up yet. She began making her way to the kitchen to brew some coffee because the coffee she drank five hours ago at Kyle's was wearing off and she needed to up the caffeine levels in her blood.

"Flatbutt." She heard the very familiar voice of Fat Amy say as soon as she entered the kitchen.

"Jesus Christ, Amy!" Beca jumped. "You startled me."

"Sorry," Fat Amy apologized not sounding very apologetic.

"What are you doing here? It's still early."

"I woke up craving donuts and since the best donuts are Gordon's and you live near Gordon's I figured I'd just come share them with you." She paused to swallow. "Where were you?" Fat Amy asked holding the box of donuts in Beca's direction.

"Early morning walk on the beach," Beca lied instantly. "Did you let yourself in?" she grabbed a donut.

"Yes, your mother isn't up yet. I didn't want to wake her up." Fat Amy leaned against the counter. "So, early morning walk on the beach, huh?"

"Yep." Beca walked to the coffee machine to set it up. "Want some coffee?"

"I want to know why you smell like male body spray," Amy said then paused to sniff her friend. "Armani?" She smirked at Beca who was running a hand through her hair. "Such a familiar smell. I wonder where I smelled it before." Fat Amy made a show of tapping her chin.

Beca rolled her eyes as Amy brought the donut she had in her hand to her mouth.

"I haven't slept and my head hurts, cut to the chase and let me have it, Amy," Beca sighed, tilting her head to look at Fat Amy.

"You haven't slept," Amy echoed, snickering.

"I told you about the thing I do when I'm about to go back to the States which by the way you will regret not giving a shot," Beca told her, knowing exactly where her mind went.

"Fine." Fat Amy paused. "I will try not to make too many jokes until we're in America and you've slept but I have one question—"

"—If it's about his dick then forget about it," Beca interrupted.

"Oh c'mon, Beca."

"Nope." The brunette shook her head, pulling her phone from her pocket to avoid eye contact.

She quickly tapped on the messaging app icon to reply to Jesse's text from the night before where he mentioned some very stereotypical activities.

 _Beca: 'You forgot surfing, wrestling crocodiles, having barbies, and drinking foster.'_

She was surprised by how quick his reply was.

 _Jesse: 'For real, though, how often do you get to hang out with kangaroos?'_

 _Beca: 'Well, over the summer two kangaroos walked into the bar I hung out at on two separate occasions.'_

 _Jesse: 'Do you have pictures?'_

Of course, she took some pictures when kangaroos showed up. She sent him a few where Fat Amy was handling the situation. She gave the kangaroo food, that's how she handled it. Kyle had struggled until she showed up and made the animal leave with food.

 _Jesse: 'I need to visit Australia.'_

* * *

"Oh, Jesse, how about this one." Jesse tilted his head to look at Chloe's phone when his head it up then took the beer she handed him and brought it to his lips.

"It's nice," he mumbled against the bottle.

"C'mon, it's more than nice. It's perfect and exactly what you said you want. Look there's even a pool." She went over the pictures provided by the owner of the house.

"Send me a link. I'll look into it later." He set the beer on the counter and went to check the steak cooking in the oven.

Chloe beamed at him then e-mailed him the link to the webpage then sucked in a deep breath. "Smells awesome, Jesse," she told him.

He chuckled, pulling the steak from the oven. "You're just hungry."

"What?" he asked when she frowned, pressing a hand against her back. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I think I am." Chloe nodded.

Jesse eyed her briefly then set the steak on the kitchen island while the redhead when to set the table.

"Jesse!" He heard her shriek from the dining room and exited the kitchen in a hurry to see what was up. He didn't have to ask, the pool of water on the wooden floor was enough of an answer.

"Jesse, I can't be having her now, not when her dad is in a different time zone!"

"Chloe, breathe. It's gonna be okay," he spoke gently as he walked towards her. "It's early labor, you won't be giving birth until like twelve hours from now." He had done his homework about pregnancy ever since Adam called him and asked if he could stay with Chloe once he was off the road since he had to leave for work and didn't want Chloe to be alone so late in the pregnancy.

"Active labor should last between three to five hours. A flight from London to Atlanta takes eight hours. We'll tell Adam and he'll get on the first flight he finds." He ran to the living area and reached for his phone, dialing his brother's phone number.

"You tell Adam while I go get something to clean the floor then get you something to change into—or just shower…" he sucked in a breath to stop with the rambling. "I'll go run the shower while you talk to Adam," he finally said.

"Okay," Chloe agreed, accepting his cellphone.

His brother was meant to be away for a week consulting some company based in the UK that was facing financial problem yet Jesse so far had spent three weeks with his sister in law. Jesse, of course, didn't mind keeping the redhead company, running errands, doing chores, giving foot rubs, and cooking—They mostly ordered take out but he cooked either when he felt like it or Chloe craved something. He loved Chloe and wouldn't even think about leaving her alone so late in the pregnancy.

/*...*/

"I expect you to move into the house by Sunday, we'll talk about practice sometime next week. The annual initiation party is being held by the empty pool, all the other teams will be there. The Trebles are rivals, they're a bunch of competitive idiots so don't start anything when they try to provoke you tonight. The high notes are our unofficial drug dealers. The BU Harmonics are very passionate about Madonna and polo t-shirts… I don't know why I'm telling you all this. Have fun and be safe," Beca told the newest additions to the team; Flo and Fat Amy who both happened to be exchange students.

"I thought you weren't going to stop talking," Fat Amy noted as the Bellas began making their way out of the room headed to the initiation party.

"Shut up," Beca retorted. "Being a captain is weird."

"Well, you're the captain, not the group's mom." She threw an arm around Beca's shoulder as they began walking, heading out. "And not because if you take all this off." She gestured at her friend's face. "You'd look like a teenage boy." She paused. "You know, with a physique like yours you'd be perfect for the Jump Street Program," she noted.

"You do realize that Jump Street was just a TV show, right?"

"No, it isn't," Fat Amy scoffed.

Beca tilted her head to look at her, needing to see her friend's face because she couldn't tell if the new Bella was joking.

"They rebooted 21 Jump Street with Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill," Fat Amy reminded and Beca just shook her head.

"Hear that, Beca?" Fat Amy said, bringing a hand to her ear for emphasis once they reached the party. "That's the dance floor calling my sexy fat ass," she continued.

"Own it," Beca smirked as Fat Amy began walking backward.

Fat Amy did a curtsy then swiftly turned on her heels, leaving Beca by herself.

Beca went to get a cup of beer and smiled when her eyes met Benji's who waved at her as he began walking her way, sporting a maroon sweater and grinning from ear to ear.—the cape was nowhere in sight, she was thrilled he took her advice and stopped wearing it.

"Just so you know, if this goes missing, it wasn't me that took it," Beca told him as she felt the fabric of the sweatshirt to which he laughed. "It's gonna fun beating you," she added as she brought the red solo cup she just filled with beer to her lips.

"No, it's gonna be fun to beat _you_ ," he countered, grabbing a cup to get beer as well.

"So, now that you're a member of the self-proclaimed "bad boys" of A Cappella will start going by Ben?" Beca asked, smirking at the boy who rolled his eyes, a habit he picked up from her, in response—she was rubbing off a lot on him, she didn't know if she should worry or be proud.

"How many did you add to the group?" he asked as they took a seat on the edge of the empty pool.

"Just two," Beca answered. "Fat Amy who you met on Moving Day and Flo, that girl doing a backflip," she nodded at Flo as she stuffed her hand the pocket of her sweatshirt to pull her phone when she felt it vibrate.

 _Jesse: 'Hey, Bec. Call me when you see this.'_

She hadn't heard his voice in months, they just texted now. Beca cleared her throat as she brought her phone to her ear, ignoring the feeling in the pit of her stomach.

The phone only rung once before he picked up. "Hey, Becs," he answered the phone in a rush. "How are you doing?" he asked, she could tell he wanted something and was just being polite.

"I'm doing alright. I'd ask how you're doing but you're clearly not calling because you missed my voice, so, yeah, what's up, dude?" She heard him sigh and frowned, starting to worry.

"So, you know I'm staying with Chloe since Adam is away for work," he began to say. "She's in labor."

"Shit," Beca mumbled. "Sorry, I mean, great. That's great. Your brother's still away?"

"That's why I'm calling you. He found a fight and should get here around Four AM. By then Chloe would be in active labor and could even have given birth. I can't leave her side."

"You want me to pick Adam up from the airport," she figured.

"I'll ask someone else if you can't—"

"No, dude, of course, I can pick Adam up." She just had to get a hold of a car, she'd go to her father if he was in town—Dr. Mitchell and Sheila were away for the weekend.

"Thank you so much, Beca. I owe you."

"Yeah, big time," she sarcastically replied to which he chuckled.

"Hey, Benji, you know anyone who would loan me their car?" Beca asked upon hanging up.

He thought about it briefly then shook his head. "Who are you picking from the airport?"

"Jesse's brother." She took a sip of beer, trying to think of something to get a hold of a car, and then briefly recounted her conversation with Jesse to Benji.

"Why don't you just take the Bellas' bus?" he suggested.

"That's a good idea, except I'm not licensed to drive buses. But Amy is." Problem solved, sort of. Beca had to convince Amy to drive all the way to Atlanta in the middle of the night and play chauffeur for the Swansons.

/*...*/

Childbirth was scary and amazing and so many other adjectives that contradicted each other. Jesse was exhausted but nowhere near as Chloe. She pushed a child out of her lady parts, his niece, and he saw it. It made his heart swell and stomach flip at the same time.

Chloe fell asleep waiting for Adam to arrive and Jesse had been staring at his cellphone, waiting for Beca to reply to his text asking for updates.

He lifted his head when he heard a knock and felt a wave a relief when he saw Adam.

"Congrats, man," Jesse mumbled, hugging him tightly.

"How is Chloe? Was the delivery okay? Were there complications? Where's my daughter?"

"Chloe is fine, just tried. Yes, the delivery went well. No, there's none. Your baby is super healthy. The nurse said she'd bring her in like half an hour for Chloe to nurse," Jesse answered as he broke the hug. Adam nodded then tilted his head to look at Chloe before he made his way to the bed where she slept while Jesse let himself out.

"Hey," he greeted, finding Beca in the hallway.

"Wow, you look awful," she mumbled eyeing him.

"Is it the beard?" he asked, walking towards her. He was going to shave eventually. It was just that there was no need to have a shaved face.

"Have you tried braiding it?" she questioned him as he stopped in front of her.

"No, not yet," he answered, grinning at her. It was great seeing her. He missed her a lot yet never made an effort to go see her. He was almost sure that his tiny feelings had faded and meeting her would either confirm or deny that and he wasn't ready for the latter.

"Thanks, Becs." He threw an arm around her shoulder and pulled into his chest, hugging her and resting his chin on top of her head. "I really owe you."

"Just pay for breakfast and we're even," she mumbled against his chest, her arms wrapped lowly around his waist. "Mine and Amy's that is. She drove us here."

"Is your driver's license suspended or something?" he asked, pulling his head back while still holding her.

"I don't have a car and the only vehicle available was the Bellas' bus, and unlike me, Amy is licensed to drive buses."

"Well, where is she?" he wanted to know.

"Having a date with the vending machine downstairs," she informed.

He snorted, "C'mon, let's go get some actual food." He pulled away from the hug, yet kept his arm wrapped around her shoulder.

"Um, how are Chloe and the baby?" Beca asked as they began walking towards the elevator.

"They're well." Jesse shrugged then pressed the button to get the elevator. "It was a long night and thank god it's all over," he sighed.

"Oh, poor you. You had to be supportive of your sister in law who gave birth which I hear is _easy peasy lemon squeezy_ ," Beca deadpanned as they stepped inside the elevator.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Beca arched an eyebrow when she found Jesse staring at her.

"Nothing." He smiled at her and pressed the ground floor button. He was glad to see her. And gladder to know that the feelings he had developed faded.


	12. Chapter 12

Jesse didn't realize he was hungry until he started eating. He knew the food on his plate wasn't the greatest thing he had ever tasted because come on, it's hospital cafeteria food, but it sure felt like the best thing he ever had. He glanced at Beca who had just slapped Amy's hand away from her tray then picked up the muffin on his tray. "Here you go, Amy."

"Thanks, mate," Fat Amy thanked, gratefully accepting the muffin he offered.

As his mouth was full of grilled cheese, he settled for nodding. "You don't have to be so _gallant,_ Jesse," Beca deadpanned. "I'm sure Amy can go get her _own_ muffins."

He shrugged. "I'm paying, anyway." Getting hiccups from eating in a rush, Jesse grabbed his coffee and shugged some of it down.

"Amy!" Beca called when Fat Amy took the muffin that Beca had been trying to keep her from taking.

"You weren't going to eat it," Fat Amy shrugged.

"Doesn't mean you can have it, besides, Jesse just gave you his."

Fat Amy shrugged in response and got kicked in the shin by Beca. "Very mature, Beca."

"Oh, like you're one to talk about maturity," Beca snorted.

Jesse could tell that the bickering was harmless because they reminded him of himself and his siblings.

"Ladies," he called. "Is a muffin really worth fighting?" he questioned.

"She started it," they said in unison, pointing fingers at each other and causing Jesse to chuckle.

He tried to keep a straight face when Beca tilted her head to glare at him, Fat Amy didn't seem to mind him.

"Hey, Amy," he called. "Does Beca have an accent I don't know of?" He had asked Beca before and she said no but he had to check. Beca, after all, forgot to mention the fact that her mother was Aussie and that she had lived in Australia even if it was for a few years before she moved to the United States.

"No," Amy answered him and he'll admit he was a little bummed out. "But she can pull off a decent Aussie accent." He tilted his head to look at Beca and gave her puppy dog eyes, matching them with a grin that spoke louder than words.

"No," Beca shook her head.

"Oh, come on, Beca."

"Ask her after a few drinks," Fat Amy suggested. "She'll do it."

"Duly noted." He picked up his sandwich and took a bite. "If I hadn't met your mother, would you have ever told me she's Australian?" he mumbled as he chewed.

"Didn't think it's important."

"It's interesting," he replied.

"When did you meet Eliza?" Fat Amy wanted to know.

"At the ICCAs," he answered, frowning a little at the look Fat Amy and Beca shared. "What?"

"Nothing," Beca spoke before Fat Amy could.

"Did your mother say something about me?" he questioned then tilted his head to look at Fat Amy when Beca said nothing in response.

The blonde shook her head, "Don't look at me. Beca never tells me anything. She definitely didn't wake me up in the middle of the night to tell me what Eliza had to say about you."

"Damn it, Amy!"

Jesse rested his cheek against the palm of his hand after placing his elbow on the table and tilting his head to look at Beca.

"It's nothing, really. Just some awkward mother-daughter talk," Beca grumbled.

"Ehh, it was more than that," Fat Amy sang and received a glare from her friend. "Let's just say that if you by some chance decide to start dating your ship has a captain."

"Ship?" Jesse glanced at the blonde.

" _Relationship_. You have Eliza's blessings if you two picked up the shagging and threw monogamy and romance into the mix," Fat Amy said. "You need to get up to date with the modern lingo, old man."

Jesse sat up. "I did not see this coming," he admitted.

"Me neither," Fat Amy added. "When exactly were you going to tell me that this is your guy?" she questioned her friend while she nodded at Jesse.

"Jess's isn't my guy," Beca rolled her eyes.

"Right, Tarzan is," Fat Amy replied and Beca rolled her eyes yet again.

"I have so many questions about what your mother said but first who's Tarzan?" Jesse asked.

"No one," Beca told him so he turned to Fat Amy.

"A guy Beca humped and didn't completely dump," Fat Amy told him.

"Not true," Beca denied.

"Really now?" Fat Amy challenged.

"We just hung out sometimes and that was it." Beca nodded.

"Then why is he posting pathetic poems for status on Facebook that are a hundred percent about you?"

"I wasn't aware of that." Beca frowned and accepted Fat Amy's phone a minute later. "See for yourself."

Jesse peeked his head to look at the screen and snickered once he saw for himself what Fat Amy was talking about. "Wow," Jesse dragged the word sarcastically. "Looks like Tarzan found his Jane in you, Becs," he continued and joined Fat Amy when she began singing _You'll Be in My Heart_ from _Tarzan_ under her breath.

"You guys are assholes," Beca deadpanned to which the pair currently getting weird glances for the soft singing shrugged.

* * *

"She can't be here for Chloe, right?" Beca asked once she glanced at Jesse and found him already looking where she was as she, Jesse, and Fat Amy made their way towards the elevator to go up to Chloe's room and say hi before the girls left. With the kind of relationship Jesse and Chloe had, Beca doubted Chloe would still be friends with the woman that broke Jesse's heart in the shittiest way ever.

"I don't know," he replied and reached for the elevator button, pressing it.

Beca glanced yet again at the woman before fixating on the elevator door. She could feel herself get riled up as she thought about the emotional damage Hollie did to Jesse.

And, of course, she'd climb into the elevator with them. "Hey, Jesse," Hollie greeted, sounding unsure. Jesse nodded curtly at her then smiled, looking outside of the elevator, hearing someone ask them to hold the door. Fat Amy kept the door from closing until the blonde was in the elevator.

"Aubrey," he called. "Long time, no see. How have you been?"

"I've been very busy," she sighed, smiling back at him. "It's quite the hassle managing a business without your partner," she added.

Jesse nodded, a small sympathetic smile on his lips, as he eyed the blonde with whom his sister-in-law shared a wedding planning business. "Well, I'm here if you need help," he offered, despite knowing how unlikely Aubrey would take him up on it—she had a lot of pride.

"Actually, we need someone to look at the numbers," she told him and he had a hard time keeping his expression neutral because Aubrey Posen just accepted his help. "I know you quit your job but do you think you could do some financial analysis us? Business' booming and we'd like to some consulting on what to do next." She cleared her throat and Jesse knew it killed her a little to ask for his advice.

Chloe probably told Aubrey not to ask Jesse for his financial assistance because he hated his former job with passion and wanted nothing to do with it yet Aubrey still asked, so she must really need his help.

"Sure, Aubrey." He nodded. "Just let me know when and I'll drop by the office," he added, quickly glancing at Beca who was glaring at Hollie.

"You quit your job?" Hollie asked in confusion and he replied with a hum. He saw her as soon as she stepped inside the hospital and decided he was going to ignore her thus missed Aubrey when she entered the hospital. He could tell Beca had other plans and that worried him slightly, though.

"Well, what do you do now?" she asked and he could hear Beca inhale sharply.

"And, why do you care?" Beca asked back.

"Excuse me?" Hollie frowned, taken aback with Beca's choice of word and tone.

"Did I stutter?" Beca questioned.

"Jesse, who's this? _Your girlfriend_?" Hollie said instead of replying to Beca's question.

"Oh, I'm just his friend. But if I were his girlfriend I definitely wouldn't fuck his best friend while we're together," Beca spoke before Jesse could. "And, because I'm his friend I won't just stand here and listen to your pathetic attempt at small talk. So, do us all a favor and don't." Feeling Jesse's fingers dig into her arm, Beca figured she should leave it at that.

"I don't want things to be weird between us, Jesse." Hollie began to say, looking at Jesse. "Like, put it all behind us and who knows possibly be friends?"

Guess won't be leaving it at _that._ "Friends? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Beca questioned. "Are you, like, delusional or something?" she paused, needing a second because the thought of sucker punching Hollie crossed her mind and it was quite appealing. "Just fuck off."

"Jesse, are you gonna say something or are gonna let your _little_ attorney talk to me like that?"

"Yeah, of course," he nodded as he subtly unfisted Beca's hand, noticing that her knuckles were turning white. "Eh, what she said." He pointed at Beca with his free hand.

Luckily they didn't have to stay in the same small space longer because the elevator reached their level.

"This is my fault," Aubrey spoke once the elevator door closed, leaving Hollie behind, and they were walking towards Chloe's room. "I ran into her in the parking lot, she told me she was here visiting a relative and asked why I'm here. I should have told her not to come."

"It's okay, Aubrey," Jesse told her with a shrug as he stuffed his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants once he realized he was still holding Beca's hand.

"Just so you know, if Beca tried to punch her I would have helped and not just because I don't want Beca to hurt herself trying to beat someone bigger than her." Fat Amy patted his shoulder.

"Thanks, Amy," he replied. "But I'd appreciate it more if you'd stop Beca if she had tried to punch Hollie," he was saying as Aubrey knocked on the door of Chloe's room before she unlocked it.

"Are we allowed in?" Aubrey asked, peeking her head.

"Of course you are," Chloe told her, beaming her business partner/best friend before she looked behind her and saw Beca walking as well as Fat Amy and Jesse.

"Hey, Chloe," Beca greeted, waving at the redhead. "Congrats. Um, this is my friend Amy she drove us here." She gestured at Fat Amy not knowing what else to say.

"Fat Amy," Fat Amy corrected, earning a confused from both Chloe and Aubrey. "So twig bitches like you don't do it behind my back," she explained.

"Well, thank you for getting Adam from the airport," Chloe thanked, getting over what Fat Amy had just said. "And for calling me a twig bitch, I sure don't feel very twiggy," she let out a humorless chuckle then sniffled, getting emotional.

"Aw, honey, you're twiggy alright." Adam placed a peck on her cheek. "You just gained healthy baby weight that you will lose." He pecked her cheek again.

"I'll make you lose it," Aubrey assured her friend as she patted the redhead's thigh. "So, don't worry about that."

"Thanks, Bree," Chloe smiled.

"So, what did you name your rug rat?" Fat Amy went on to ask as Chloe handed Aubrey her baby.

"Excuse me?" Chloe frowned, using the back of her hand to wipe her nose.

"Baby, she means baby," Beca spoke. "That's Aussie slang for baby."

"Iris Lana," Adam answered, rubbing Chloe's arm as he rested his head against hers.

"She's so precious," Aubrey gushed before handed her to Jesse.

"Hey, Iris Lana," Jesse softly said to his baby niece. "We've already met earlier but I didn't properly introduce myself, I'm Jesse, your favorite uncle." He grinned at the infant whose eyes were barely open.

"You can hold her if you want," Chloe said as she watched Beca stroke the newborn's cheek who was in her uncle's arms.

Beca stepped back when Jesse looked up. "She can't bite even she wanted to, she's got no teeth yet," he mumbled, smiling at the eye-roll he received, and held Iris Beca's way. She let out a breath and carefully took the baby from him.

"Beca, introduce yourself, don't just hold her awkwardly, you'll weird her out," Jesse told her.

"How could I possibly weird out an infant?" Beca asked. "Pretty sure she doesn't fully comprehend the fact that she's no longer in her mother's womb yet."

"Fine, I'll do it for you," he sighed and threw an arm around Beca's shoulder as he leaned down. "Iris, sweetie, this is Beca, she'll have your back if assholes who hurt you try to breathe the same air as you." He placed a small peck on his niece's forehead.

"She's so adorable, I might steal and raise her as my own," Jesse mumbled. "Can I steal her and raise her as my own?" He looked at his brother and sister-in-law.

"We had fun making her and we'd like to keep her so _no_ ," Adam answered. "Now, tell me." He sat up. "Who's picking Chloe's folks up from the airport?" he wondered looking between Jesse and Aubrey.

"I'll go," Jesse told him.

"Might wanna hold a sign, they may not recognize you with that beard," Adam advised. "Hell, our parents wouldn't recognize you... don't shave until I've thought a practical joke to pull on them when they're back from their cruise."

"I don't plan to shave anytime soon, so, you got it, man." Jesse shrugged.

"You guys really need to grow up and start behaving your age," Aubrey told the brothers. "You just had a baby." She pointed at Adam. "And, you," she sighed, looking at Jesse. "You should probably shave to look your age, that beard isn't doing you any favors."

"What, do I look old and wise?" Jesse grinned.

"No, you look old and sad," Aubrey told him.

"I'm not sad," he replied. "I'm actually the happiest I've been in a while."

"Yet somehow you look like you live on the streets and possibly have killed a squirrel or a cat recently to eat for lunch. Might even be dabbling in male prostitution," Fat Amy noted. "Which isn't working out for you since instead of attracting clients you scare them off and no one wants to be your pimp."

"Amy, I think I get it, you can stop," Jesse told the blonde.

"Don't listen to them, I think you look... _fine_ ," Chloe said and slapped Adam's chest when he snorted. "I've never seen you so carefree and it suits you," she added.

"Thanks, Chlo," he smiled at her.

"But you could always use hair conditioner and trim it a little," she grimaced.

"Or just shave," Adam chimed in. "But not until we go through with the prank," he quickly added.

"I think you look perfect," Beca blurted out and as a consequence, everyone in the room looked at her. "Not perfect in the literal sense because perfection is overrated." She shrugged. "You're perfect when you're most comfortable in your skin," she went on to ramble before she tilted her head to look at Jesse who she could feel gazing at her. "Even if means looking like a hobo," she continued, meeting his gaze.

"Looks Iris agrees with you, Beca," Chloe chuckled when Iris cooed.

Beca looked away from Jesse's eyes because the look in them was starting to make her uncomfortable and she wasn't fond of the uncharacteristic feeling in the pit of her stomach that was behind her discomfort.

"No, I think she wants her mommy," Beca remarked and rushed to give baby Iris to her mother.

"Jesse, you should probably head out if you wanna beat traffic," Adam noted.

"Right," Jesse nodded. "Bec, you heading back to Barden?" he asked.

"Yep," Beca replied, stuffing her hands in her back pockets. "I have to get the bus back in the garage before anyone notices we took it."

"Oh, Aubrey, Beca's a Bella," Chloe informed.

"Really?" Aubrey said in surprise. "Huh, you seem a little _alternative_ to be a Bella."

"Bellas aren't stuck up bitches anymore, Aubrey," Jesse told the blonde. "Looking like Victoria's secret rejects isn't a priority, no offense."

"None taken," Chloe replied while Aubrey narrowed her eyes at him.

"I'm just saying, Beca doesn't _look_ like she'd be into A Cappella all together," Aubrey elaborated.

"Is it the tattoos?" Beca asked, flipping Aubrey off while pretending to show her the tattoo on the side of her middle finger. Her action made both Adam and Fat Amy chuckle.

"Becs led the Bellas into winning the ICCAs," he let her know. "The Barden Bellas made history thanks to her."

"I heard the Bellas's set was quite spectacular," Aubrey acknowledged.

"It was awesome," Jesse grinned as he reached to open the door.

"Welp, it was really nice seeing you, guys, again. And, meeting you, Aubrey," she smiled tightly meeting the blonde's gaze before she walked past her and out of the room.

"You didn't have to do that," Beca mumbled as she, Jesse, and Fat Amy made their way to the elevator.

"Aubrey can be a bit of a bitch sometimes, didn't want you guys to fight." He shrugged. "She's great once you get to know her."

"I'm sure she is," Beca replied dryly.

"Thanks, by the way," he said while nudging her. "When I first saw her my initial plan was to just ignore her but I like your approach better."

"Well, someone had to say something. I mean, the nerve with that woman, ugh."

"You regret not throwing that punch, don't you," Fat Amy guessed and was met with a curt nod from her friend.

* * *

 **AN:** The next chapter won't be expository like this one, I promise. I'm not a big fan of exposition myself so I understand if this felt very bleh. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoyed it. Your feedback is very much appreciated.


	13. Chapter 13

_Disclaimer: I do not endorse drug use, the illegal and harmful kind that is._

* * *

She wasn't in her room, she could tell because there wasn't a wide French door that opened to a balcony in her room. Her headache was agonizingly painful, she couldn't bring herself to try and recall the events of the day before. She was so, _so_ hungover. Placing a hand over her eyes, she gave trying to make sense of the blur that was her memory of the prior day a shot and came back with nothing.

Feeling movement in the bed, she opened her eyes, sat up, and looked down at herself. Okay, she wasn't naked. The oversized t-shirt she had on wasn't hers which was weird but at least she was wearing underwear. Peeling the duvet slowly off the person lying next to her, she held her breath in anticipation. She fell back on the bed, seeing that it was Benji.

"What the fuck happened last night?" she wondered under her breath.

"Alcohol, gallons of alcohol," Benji answered in a low but audible voice.

"Did _we_?" She didn't think they did but she had to check.

"No, we didn't," he answered while he rubbed his face.

"You sure? 'Cause, I remember nothing."

He audibly laughed, "Trust me, Beca. I'd remember if you and I had sex." He sat up.

"So, how did we end up here?" she asked.

Benji was about to answer her when they heard knocking on the door. "I should check that out," he said then climbed out of bed. Beca tried not to look at his morning wood that was on display through his boxer shorts and looked at the ceiling instead.

The pain of her headache distracted her noticing the throbbing coming from her hand. Noticing, at last, she held her hand up. "What the fuck," she mumbled, eyeing her newly tattoo index.

She couldn't help but eavesdrop when Benji unlocked the door and recognized their visitor as Benji's cousin David. David's voice helped jock her memory, she was Benji's date for his sister's wedding.

Beca didn't like David at all mainly because he was such a dick to Benji. Other things made her dislike him, too, such as his arrogance but the fact that he straight up bullied Benji then brushed it off as just kidding around was the main reason. He wasn't kidding. He was a fucking bully who felt better about himself when he took jabs at his awkward and nerdy cousin. And, what better way to get back at him for what he put Benji through than to pretend that she and Benji hooked up? Especially when David hit on her not very subtly.

Rhetorical question: No answer needed.

She climbed out of bed and pulled the t-shirt over her head, quickly undoing her bra and grabbing the duvet and wrapping it around herself.

"Benji," she called. "Is that room service you're talking to?" she asked before peeking her head to look at the cousins standing at the door.

"Eh, no, it's just David," Benji answered, rubbing the back of his neck before he tilted his head to look at her.

"Oh, hey, David," she smiled curtly meeting David's gaze and trying to laugh at the look on his face as he eyed her. She tightened her hold on the duvet, looked back at Benji, and regretted it because the look on Benji's face was even funnier: He was so confused.

"I just came up to let you know that everyone is having breakfast downstairs in half an hour," David finally said.

"Save us seats, would you?" She cleared her throat, glancing at Benji. "You know, in case we don't make it downstairs on time," she continued, meeting David's gaze.

"Su-sure," David nodded.

"Okay, great. See you later." Benji said in a rush and closed the door in his cousin's face. "What the heck are you doing?" he asked in confusion.

"Keep your voice down, he could hear you," Beca told him.

"Beca, he must be thinking we slept together!"

"Yeah, that's what I was going for." She sighed. "Look, he's a dick. I heard him give you a hard time over, _you know,_ your love life. This should shut him up." She grabbed his t-shirt and waited until Benji gave her his back before she dropped the duvet and wore the t-shirt.

"You didn't have to do that," he mumbled, turning once he heard Beca unlocked the bathroom door.

"I know." She shrugged. "I won't take long." She nodded at the bathroom. "Um, before I go. When and why did I get this?" She showed him the lightsaber tattooed on her index. "Shit. You got one, too," she added noting the similar tattoo on the very irritated skin of his index finger.

"Oh my god!" he shrieked once he looked down at his newly tattooed finger.

"I'll take that you don't remember," she figured.

* * *

"Looking at it intensity won't make it disappear, you know?" Beca mumbled, glancing at Benji to find him staring at his index instead of looking at his sister who was currently getting married.

"Bubbe will get a cardiac arrest once she sees this," he was gently rubbing his thumb against his raw skin.

"Just keep your hand in your pocket when you're around her and you'll be fine." Beca got a neat judgmental look from Benji's grandmother when they first met once the old lady saw the tattoos on her arms and for the brief time she spent in her presence she knew Benji wasn't overacting. His Bubbe, as everyone called her, was quite interesting: very loving and very strict and judgy at the same time.

"Can't I hide it with makeup?" he wondered.

"Not when it's new, you can't," she answered. "Look, at least your tattoo means something to you," she added before she looked back the couple under Chuppah once she heard glass shatter and saw that the groom had just stomped on the glass as part of the Jewish wedding ceremony traditions.

"Mazel tov!" people cheer and Beca just clapped along then followed Benji at the mention of food.

"How did your family react when you got your first tattoo?" Benji asked as the two sat down to eat.

"Grandma asked if the artist told me everything I need to know about taking care of a tattoo and like reminded me all the time to wash it and put ointment until it healed," she recalled. "Dad didn't see it until I went to visit him like three months later and he just sighed."

"Which one was your first?" he went on to wonder.

Beca patted her shoulder because her mouth was full of food and she couldn't exactly talk and Benji nodded understanding it's the rose on her back. They both looked up when David sat in front of them.

"Hi," he greeted. "I couldn't help but notice the fact that your hand never left your pocket, Benji. Are you tryna hide _something_?" he suggestively said to which Beca rolled her eyes while Benji frowned in confusion not getting what his cousin meant.

"I must say it's not very appropriate to tease my cousin in public where anyone can see, Beca" he continued, meeting Beca's gaze.

"Wait—" Benji began to say then stopped when he felt Beca nudge his leg with hers under the table.

"Did you _see_ us do something unappropriated in public?" Beca questioned to which David shook his head.

"Then I don't see the problem, buddy." She shrugged, smirking as David let out a humorless chuckle.

"That looks new. When did you get it?" he said, noticing the lightsaber on Beca's index.

"Last night," Beca answered.

"Never in a million years would have guessed you're a Starwars fan," he mumbled. "Nor would I have guessed you two are a thing." He gestured between Beca and Benji. "So, how did you manage to woo Beca, cous?" he went on to ask. "Can't be the magic tricks, can it?"

"It's actually _a lot_ of things, David. Benji's got a big heart. He's great in so many ways and great at _a lot_ of stuff," Beca answered before Benji could utter a word, smiling sweetly the boy sitting next to her.

" _A lot_ , huh?"

"Yep," Beca nodded, glad David understood what she was hinting at, unlike his cousin. She also made a mental note to try and educate Benji a little because he was way too clueless for a 20-year-old, it was painful.

"Hey, David, could you not tell everyone," Benji mumbled.

"Why, are you keeping it a secret? Oh, is it you Beca that wants to keep it a secret. I'd totally get it if it's you. I mean, it would make an awful lot of sense if you don't want people to know."

Benji spotted the way Beca clenched her jaw and spoke before she insulted David. "We thought we'd take it slow and not tell our families right away. See where it goes first because we're so, _so_ different and it's very likely not to work out."

"I understand," David nodded. "Well, I better go say hi to uncle Jamie, I haven't seen him in months. See you around." He winked at Beca before he got up.

"You really think that we can't work?" Beca asked once they were alone. "Don't get me wrong, I like you but not to the point where I wanna date you. I'm just curious. Do you really think being different is a deal breaker?"

"Well, no, being different is not a deal breaker." He paused. "I simply cannot like you. You're a heartbreaker which is why I decided from the moment I met you that you're off limits."

"Heartbreaker? What gave you that vibe?"

"Um, everything about you," he chuckled humorlessly. "Your thoughts on life, love, even friendship. I don't understand how you can be friends with someone you're involved with physically and maintain a healthy friendship after ending things. I find it both fascinating and scary because I don't think it's possible to have meaningless sex with a person frequently and not develop feelings. You, however, not only managed to do it but you're also still very good friends."

"It's weird with Jesse. I wouldn't recommend staying friends with a former fuck buddy," she mumbled after a brief period of silence as she reached for a napkin and brought it to her lips.

"Weird. How so?" Benji wondered.

"I don't know." She shrugged. "I feel weird when I'm around him."

"Weird because you want _him_ ," he cleared his throat.

"No, not necessarily." She shook her head. "I don't know to put it. He just feels homey. When he looks at me, I feel both anxious and relieved at the same time. And I want to hate that feeling but I don't." She shrugged. "So, I just try to avoid looking him in the eye and ignore it when it gets all weird."

"Tell me," Benji began to say and watched Beca tilt her head to look at him. "Would you describe it as butterflies in your stomach?" he wanted to know and was met with a blank look.

"No," she answered. "I mean, it can't be _that_."

"Why not?"

"Because it's not!" she exclaimed. "I don't want him that way. C'mon, it's Jesse. Sure, he's a great guy but my feelings for him are definitely platonic."

"Okay," Benji said.

"Okay?" Beca frowned.

"Yeah, okay." He nodded. "You don't have to explain yourself. I believe you, just don't yell."

"Okay, good." She tossed the napkin on the table.

* * *

"Hey, Becs," Jesse said once he unlocked the door and found none other than Beca Mitchell at his doorstep. "Is everything okay?" It was quite late and he wasn't expecting her.

"Yeah, I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd come say hi." She smiled at him.

"Well, come on in." He stepped back and let her inside the house. "I haven't finished unpacking so excuse the chaos." He rubbed the back of his neck.

"Where's Thororeo?" Beca asked as she looked for the cat.

"Uh, I think he's asleep somewhere." He closed the door and followed her into his house. "Were you at a party?" He smelled beer off her when she walked past him.

"Yeah." She nodded.

Beca tried not to think about what Benji brought up but it was so damn hard she wanted to strangle Benji. She tried to explain the said weird feeling that washed over her whenever she was around Jesse and came back with nothing. So after a few beers, she decided it was a great idea to go over to Jesse's new place and figure it out there after talking about it with a random dude who thought he'd be getting laid once she was done rambling.

"Oh, the joys of being college," Jesse sighed. "I was sorting out tableware when you knocked," he let her know.

"The joys of adulthood," Beca countered sarcastically and took his lead when he headed to the kitchen. "I knew I smelled pot on you," she mumbled inhaling deeply once the smell of weed hit her.

"When are you going to buy an actual bong?" she asked, noting that he had made a bong out of a watermelon.

"It's just fun to make fruit bongs." He shrugged. "You should hydrate," he continued, handing her a bottle of water he pulled from the fridge then taking her hand in his when he noticed the lightsaber.

"This isn't permanent, is it?"

"It's very permanent," she chuckled.

"Did someone dare you to tattoo a freaking sith lightsaber on your finger or something?"

"No, it's just poor decision making while intoxicated," she told him.

"When?" he wanted to know, letting go of her hand and watching her open the bottle.

"Last weekend when I went to Benji's sister's wedding." She paused to take a sip of water. "Benji got one, too, but in blue."

"Wow." He stepped back and resumed unpacking his tableware.

"Yeah, Benji's still not over it." She grabbed the lighter that was near the bong and picked the watermelon up. "How can I help?" she asked after blowing the puff of smoke in Jesse's direction.

"No, no, I got this. Just drink water and help yourself with some food if you want, dinner leftovers are in the fridge."

"I insist. But I will have the leftovers first."

"Knock yourself out, Bec," he chuckled. "Whoa, not literally!" He rushed to give her a hand when she turned around and walked headfirst into an unlocked cabinet door.

"I'm fine. It doesn't hurt. I can't feel it." Beca was saying as she got back on her feet thanks to the hand Jesse gave her.

"But you will tomorrow." He quickly grabbed a bag of carrots from the freezer and handed it to her. "And you will also have a nasty bruise on your forehead." He held her until she sat down on a chair. "I'll heat dinner for you. You just sit and drink water."

"But, Jesse, if I sober up now I will feel the pain of the hit I just received," she reasoned.

"Alright, smartass, do what you want to do. Just keep pressing that bag against your head unless you're cool having a bruise." He opened the fridge and pulled what was left of dinner to heat for her.

"So, how was the party?" Jesse asked as she ate the chicken he just heated for her while he stored tableware and got high.

"Eh." She shrugged. "I honestly would rather stay in and watch some dumb TLC show about weird addictions than go out."

"Why didn't you just stay in and do that? Why go out?" he asked.

"I haven't had sex in a couple of months, that's why," she deadpanned.

"Oh, I feel you," he sighed. "You're here which means you should have just stayed in and watched TLC instead."

"Word."

"That's alright. You'll get laid. I mean look at you, Becs. You're hot, smart, and really funny."

"So are you. Even with the out of control beard. I'm sure there are girls out there that are into it." She looked down at the chicken on her plate instead of looking at his face.

"Aw, Bec, thanks. You don't know how much that means to me." He squeezed her shoulder. "It's been longer than two months and it is doing _wonders_ to my self-esteem."

"How long?" She arched an eyebrow.

"Last time we hooked up long," he mumbled, stroking his beard.

"Dude, that's a really long time."

"I know," he agreed.

"Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah." He shrugged.

"It's been two months and I feel like I'm going insane. I don't know if I should worry about you or envy you."

"Neither. You should finish eating before it gets cold, though."

She rolled her eyes and gave her meal her attention. "Just tell me you're at least trying to get laid." Okay, she was worried about him. "I don't want your dick to stop working properly."

"I'm fine, Beca." He leaned against the counter and grabbed the watermelon bong, taking a hit from it.

"Prove it," she spoke and received a puzzled look from Jesse. "I didn't think before saying that. Stop looking at me like that… why are you looking at me like _that_?" His expression went from confused to thoughtful in a split second.

"Nothing." He shook his head. "Are you done with that?" He nodded at the plate.

"Yeah." She sucked her teeth while he picked the plate and went to wash it. "You totally thought about _proving_ your dick is fine, didn't you?" she figured.

"No." She heard him answer.

"Really?" She got up and made her way to the sink, leaning against it.

"Okay, yes," he admitted, glancing at her. "But only for a second." He put the plate down and used his t-shirt to dry his hands.

"Hey, so, I'm drunk and I don't think I can come up with something smart to say so I'm just gonna ask you if you wanna give it a go since we're both in dire need of some action and are _available_ ," she said to which Jesse chuckled for a second before realizing she wasn't kidding.

"It's all good up here, right?" She flickered his forehead.

He nodded and took her hand in his.

"Good." She reached with her other hand and cupped his cheek. "I'm really glad you're doing great." When they ended their relationship, Beca thought it was because Jesse needed some me-time since he wasn't feeling well mentally which was half the truth— she didn't need to know that he also had tiny feelings for her back then.

"So, wanna do this or what?" she asked and grinned when he leaned in, taking it for a yes.

* * *

"Are you okay there, Beca?" Jesse asked, peeking his head into the bathroom to look at Beca who was puking.

"No," she answered.

"I'll go get you some water, hang in there." He rubbed his eyes and turned on his heel, coming back a minute later with a glass of water.

"Thanks," she mumbled, spitting into the toilet bowl and flushing it before she pulled herself up. "Go back to bed, Jesse. I'm fine."

"Ha, nice try. So, you would sneak out while I'm asleep? Nope, not happening," he sleepily said, shaking his head and leaning against the doorway after she accepted the glass from him.

"Do you have painkillers in here? My head is killing me."

"Yeah, check the mirror cabinet," he yawned.

"Seriously, go to bed. I won't sneak out. I'm dying."

"No," he replied.

"Dude, I'm nude."

"I can see that." He rolled his eyes when she glared at him. "Fine," he mumbled and went into his bedroom.

"You know what would help you feel a little better?" he mumbled, pulling her against his chest once she climbed back onto the bed.

"Sex?"

He chuckled. "Well, sex would take your mind off your hangover but I'm really tired right now." He placed a peck on her hair. "Pot would help ease the pain. Would you like to smoke some?"

She nodded. "I'll go get it from downstairs." He pulled himself up and hopped off the bed.

He was in the process of rolling her a joint when he stepped back into his bedroom. "Bec, you still up?"

Her response was to groan. He lit the joint and took a drag from it. "Here you go." He held it her way as he sat down on the bed. He waited until she took it before he got under the covers.

"Feeling any better?" Jesse asked, interrupting the silence they got in.

"Yeah," she replied and snuggled up to him when he pulled her closer. "Much better." She smiled, feeling him make random patterns on her arm.

"Let me put this out before we start a fire." He took the joint from her and took a drag from it before he put it out. "This is nice," he mumbled and Beca hummed in agreement.

It wasn't just nice, it was a lot more than that. She was drunk when they hooked up but not too drunk to black out and if it wasn't for the pot she had smoked she would be freaking out because it was perfect. Everything was perfect. Jesse was perfect. And, those butterflies Benji talked about, they were on steroids.

Being intoxicated was probably the only reason she let herself admit to herself that everything she felt with every kiss, every touch, was due to the not very platonic feelings she had for Jesse.

She was screwed and she didn't mind, but that was probably the pot working its magic.

* * *

Beca woke up a few hours later and was alone in bed. She rubbed her face as everything came back to her and she seriously needed time to process. She took a couple of therapeutic breaths and bottled it all down for later.

She could hear Jesse downstairs making breakfast as she climbed out of bed and got dressed, throwing her clothes from the night before back on, then headed to the bathroom to freshen up.

"Morning, bestie," Jesse greeted when Beca stepped into the kitchen. "How are you feeling?" he wanted to know.

"I'm doing okay," she answered. "I think."

"You'll feel better once you had some breakfast."

"You're in an awfully good mood," she noted, sitting down and holding her mildly aching head.

"That I am," he sighed. "I feel like I could run a marathon." He placed a stack of pancakes for each one of them.

"Easy there, buddy, it's just sex." She tilted her head to look at him when he held a mug of coffee her way.

"Great sex that is," he grinned, meeting her gaze.

"Are you gonna throw up?" Jesse asked as he took a seat. "You look a little green."

"No, I'm fine." She ran a hand through her hair before she took a sip of coffee.

"I was meaning to ask your opinion on something," he started to say.

"Shoot."

"So, there's someone that I really like and who happens to live across the country," he began to say and she could feel her heart fall but she nodded and kept her expression neutral. "I wanna fly her over for a few days but I don't know if it would a good move. I don't want to creep her out. Do you think I should go for it?"

"Does she know you like her?" Beca asked.

"I think she does. I mean, we constantly text and _flirt_."

"Then go for it, man." She shrugged. "You can't just text forever. If you really want to turn it a real thing do something about."

"Shouldn't I go visit her and ask her in person if she'd like to come to Barden?"

"That's an option, too. Where does she live?"

"Idaho, I met her when Sarah and I were on the road," he answered. "Her name is Amber."

"Funny you never mentioned her before." Nope, that couldn't possibly be jealousy she was feeling, she didn't fully realize she had feelings for him until the night before.

"There wasn't a right time. She's just a friend I text. It's just that this morning I realized that I don't want to abstain from sex because it's just so awesome nor do I want to have casual sex anymore… I realized that I'm ready to date again." He let out a breath.

"How nice," she deadpanned. She didn't mean to sound sarcastic. She was happy for him but sarcasm was second nature and she was feeling a tiny bit jealous. "Who knew all you needed was some drunk/stoned sex with your former fuck buddy?"

"Don't call yourself that. You're probably the closest friend I have. I'd call you Family but it would super weird since we had sex and all."

She filled her mouth with pancakes and nodded her head. "I hope it works out with this Amber person," she said and meant it, despite the nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach. She'll figure out a way to get rid of those feelings she had for him.

"Thanks, Beca." He smiled and brought his mug of coffee to his lips. "I hope so, too." He took a sip of coffee then said, "while on the topic of dating, when are you gonna give it a shot? You're not leaving for L.A. anymore, what's stopping you."

"Monogamy doesn't sound so appealing."

"So, you don't think there's anyone out there you like enough you'd want to date them?"

She shook her head. "Nope, not going to be either."

"C'mon, really?"

"Yeah, really. That's what years of no fucks from either parent would do to a person."

"Oh, so you acknowledge you have issues." He won't deny it, he was surprised Beca casually mentioned her issues.

"Of course, I'm aware I have abandonment issues. I just made peace with them."

"You can't just make peace with your issues. You're supposed to work on them and truly believe that not everyone you let in is going to abandon you."

"Can we go back to talking about this Amber chick?" She rubbed her temples.

"No, I'm not gonna drop it. You know why?" he didn't wait for her to answer. "Because you let me into your life and I care about and won't abandon you."

"First off, you kinda weaseled your way in because you're great in the sack."

"Thanks." He grinned.

"Second, you can't fix me, Jesse. I'm a big girl, I know what's right for me. I know I'm damaged goods and I frankly don't care. Third, I just don't want to date. I don't want a boyfriend. I don't want something meaningful. I'm good. And, I'd appreciate it if you respected that."

"Fair enough." He held his hands up.

"Thank you."

"But I wanna be the first to know once you change your mind about dating."

"What makes you think I ever would?"

"You will. Someone will come along and sweep you off your feet and you won't know what hit you. Until you come to terms with the fact you, Beca Mitchell, are falling in love and it's so strange and new and exciting. And, this person will be the reason you face your issues because you want to be with them and they're worth it."

"Wow, what movie plot did you just describe?" she managed to sound sarcastic as she rolled her eyes despite the panic his words brought. Some of what he described was very accurate, which made her dread the part about falling in love and wanting to be in a relationship.

"Roll your eyes all you want, Beca, but you'll see. And I'll be here to tell you: "I told you so"," he confidently said.

"You know I was gonna offer to help you unpack but I'm starting to change my mind."

"Fine, I'll shut up about it... for now." He grinned when she rolled her eyes yet again.

* * *

AN: Thoughts?


	14. Chapter 14

Beca broke her own record in the number of mixes she could make in a week. Not only that, but she was also attending courses regularly, even when professors didn't count attendance, managing WBUJ, had figured out the Bellas set for regionals and was humbly kicking ass as a captain.

She was busy and she usually fell asleep the moment she laid in bed, which was great because it meant she was rarely alone to her thoughts, her thoughts that somehow revolved around one issue, one person more accurately.

"Jesus," Beca mumbled once she went through the playlist she put together to play throughout the night before she left the radio station. "What is happening to me?" she groaned, throwing her head back.

The playlist was a compilation of songs she wouldn't be caught sober listening to—drunk, however, she'd jam to them, which was the reason behind the playlist's creation: she was shitfaced when she put it together. There was no other explanation.

She had no time to sit and load another playlist so BU night listeners were going to have to listen to music about the joys of falling/being in love.

Beca could seriously puke and not from her hangover—her hangovers were getting worse and the thought of sticking with a couple of drinks when she'd go out was starting to sound appealing and her wallet agreed with that thought—but from the songs she had picked because she knew what all of it meant. She knew she was falling hard and she had no idea how to hit the brakes. She thought that keeping busy and basically ghosting her feelings would work but it was clearly not an efficient method hence the nauseating playlist.

Inhaling deeply, she glanced at her phone when it chimed with a text then grabbed it from the table.

Fat Amy: 'Where are you?'

 _Beca: 'Still at the radio station.'_

 _Fat Amy: 'Hurry up or you might not get to have some of your birthday cake.'_

Beca rolled her eyes before typing back her reply. _Beca: 'Eat it.'_ She didn't have a sweet tooth anyway.

Hearing a knock on the door, she tilted her head and found Pete the intern at the door.

"You're still here?" She was surprised he didn't leave the minute she told him he could which was right after he finished stacking the box of CDs she told him to stack.

"I should be asking you that but I'm glad you haven't left yet. I was counting on it." He paused. "I heard you talking on the phone earlier and thought I'd get you something," he shyly said.

Beca frowned when he stepped into the room holding a poorly wrapped present.

"Happy birthday," he mumbled. "Um, I didn't mean to eavesdrop," he added when Beca made no move to retrieve the present and sort of just looked at him blankly before she snapped out of the haze she was in and smiled at him.

"You didn't have to do this," she was saying as she stood up.

"I know. I wanted to." He stuffed his hands in his pockets after she accepted the present. "I actually saw this other day and thought of you," he told her while she unwrapped the gift. Beca noticed then how erect his breathing was and guessed he ran back to the station.

"Wow, Darth Vader travel mug," she really didn't mean to sound sarcastic but the last thing she expected was a mug with Darth Vader's head printed on it.

"You don't like it?" he worried. "I just thought because you have a Sith lightsaber tattooed on your finger you're a fan of the dark side," he explained, growing anxious. "And since you seem to always be drinking coffee you'd like it."

"No, no, I _do_ like it. Thank you. It's very thoughtful." She did appreciate the gesture. Pete barely knew her and he went and got her a present after overhearing her on the phone with her grandmother, which was very sweet of him.

"Awesome," he smiled in relief. "Any plans for your birthday?" Pete asked to avoid an awkward silence while Beca gathered her stuff.

"No, not really. I might even call it an early night." Again, still hungover. She just wanted to cuddle up to her comforter and fall asleep watching some dumb reality show. Amy told her the girls made a cake so if it's edible she'd eat a slice before going to bed.

"Not a big partier?"

"No, I party." She shrugged on her jacket. "I just don't feel like going out and celebrating the day my mother pushed me out of her vagina this year." She put the mug he just gave her in her back bag.

"Fair enough," he said, stepping outside of the room when Beca wore her back bag ready to leave. "So, you're headed home now?"

"Yep."

"I can't convince you to go grab a drink with me?"

"Maybe some other time, Pete," she declined and was glad he didn't insist.

"Well, then I'll just walk you home I guess if you don't mind."

It was so unnecessary but she didn't mind.

The Bellas house was a good fifteen-minute walk from the radio station and her company was her music usually but Pete wasn't a bad one either.

"Thanks again for the mug," Beca was saying once they stopped in front of the Bellas' house.

"You're most welcome." She could feel his eyes on her as she looked for her keys inside her back bag.

"See you at the station, Pete," she smiled tightly at him and climbed a couple of steps of the porch.

Pete had been interning at the radio station for a couple of months and they never really talked for longer than a couple of minutes and it was mostly about what he had to do since she was the manager this year and it was just the two of them at the radio station. —When the school year first started, there were a couple more interns but they stopped showing up.

"Happy birthday!" Everyone collectively said the moment she unlocked the door.

She really had no idea her friends would throw her a surprise birthday party. It was very touching and overwhelming. She didn't know what to say so she said nothing afraid something sarcastic would slip and she'd ruin it.

The Bellas were hugging her seconds later and wishing her a happy birthday. It made her heart swell because she never had a group of friends like them before. At that moment she made a mental note to stay away from liquor in order to avoid making any sappy and embarrassing speeches. She loved them dearly but they didn't have to know that.

"Oh god," Beca was saying once the Bellas finally pulled away. "I can taste your perfumes." She grimaced.

"Who's your friend?" Stacie asked, looking behind Beca and seeing that Pete was awkwardly standing outside of their house.

"Pete. He's interning at the radio station," she informed Stacie before she invited him in.

Their social circle was mainly the other a cappella groups on campus and they all were there, Beca knew they were there just for the booze and not for her and was very curious to see what sort of presents they got for her. Who she didn't expect to find was her old man.

"Dad, hey," she greeted, walking up to him.

"Happy birthday, kiddo." He pulled her into a hug. "I can't believe you're twenty," he sighed. "Look at you all grown up."

"You should probably stop calling me kiddo then don't you think," she deadpanned and smiled hearing him chuckle.

"You could be forty and have kids of your own and I'll still call you kiddo." He pulled away, amused by the grimace she made. "I should probably let you go and mingle." He stuffed his hand into his pocket.

"You can stay if you want." Beca shrugged. She didn't mind him staying at all.

"I know, Becs. I just can't look the other way when I see underage drinking." He smiled tightly. "I came to give you your birthday present and head out." He pulled car keys from his pocket and held it her way. "Your mom, Sheila and I got this for you."

"Seriously?" She couldn't believe it that her parents and step-parent got her a car, it just seemed too good to be true.

"Yes, Beca, seriously." He nodded. "It's parked in our garage. You can come and take it whenever you want."

"Thanks, dad." She took the keys from him. "I should probably call mom and say thanks."

"She's expecting a call." He nodded. "And Sheila would love it if you came over for breakfast tomorrow."

"Okay, I'll come over." The step-monster wasn't so bad and Beca didn't find her very annoying anymore. She could see that the woman was just trying to have a relationship with her and felt like an idiot for being a dick to her. She was wrong to blame her for how bad her relationship with her father was: Sheila wasn't why Dr. Mitchell sent her to live her grandmother and rarely visited. Dr. Mitchell was to blame and she was learning to forgive him because she could tell he regretted how everything turned out.

She walked Dr. Mitchell to the door, unlocking the door she saw Jesse's car pull over.

"Huh, you still _hang out_ with him?" Dr. Mitchell said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"We're just friends now, Dad," she mumbled awkwardly.

"Okay," he curtly said just as awkwardly. "Well, Becs, I'll see tomorrow." He leaned over and placed a peck on her forehead. "It's breakfast, not brunch, so try to show up before ten." His words earned an eye roll.

"Good evening, Dr. Mitchell. How's it going?" Jesse, who had just pulled his birthday present from the backseat of his car and shut the door with his hip, said.

"Quite well, Swanson," Dr. Mitchell replied. "Quite well." He unlocked his own car.

"Goodnight, professor." Jesse smiled at the man who just waved his hand as he opened the door and hopped into the car.

"Your dad doesn't like me," Jesse sighed. "Oh, well." He made his way to the Bellas' house. "Happy birthday, weirdo." He leaned in to press a kiss to her cheek.

"Thanks." She tried not to smile too hard and, like, keep it _cool._

"That looks big." She eyed the present he was holding. "What did you get me, Swanson?"

"You'll see." He grinned and followed her into the house.

"Did you know about this?" Beca asked as Jesse set his gift to her on the table near the rest of the gift she received.

"That I did." He nodded. "I got caught in traffic on the way back from Jacksonville. I hope someone caught your face on camera. Bet your reaction's priceless."

"You drove all the way from Jacksonville to get here. What were you even doing in Jacksonville? Checking up on your parents' farm and working on your tan?" He did have a tan and it suited him. He also shaved and got a haircut. He looked so good. She hoped he didn't notice she was checking him out.

"My parents just got home from their cruise. Thought I'd be nice to spend some days with them."

"Why did you even come, dude?"

"What do you mean why did I come? I couldn't miss your birthday party."

"Yeah, but your parents who you haven't seen in a year just got come."

"Eh." He shrugged. "Now, come here." He pulled her into a tight hug and she could swear she melted into it. "Happy birthday."

"Not that I mind or anything but didn't we get over with this part at the door just now?" she mumbled.

"I mean, yes, technically, I did wish a happy birthday but we didn't hug so it didn't feel right." He squeezed her in his arms. "This, though, feels so right."

She broke the hug simply because she was enjoying it a little too much. Why did he have to feel so damn warm, cozy, and so muscly?

"Have you been lifting weight?" He always had a lean physique but what she felt was definitely a more toned body underneath the shirt he was wearing.

"For a while, yeah." He flexed his bicep and she had to swallow because the room was getting a little hot.

"I need to pee. I'll see you around."

"Okay. I'll just go say hi to Amy and grab a drink." She heard him say as she turned on her heels and gave him thumbs up without turning around.

"What is happening to me?" she mumbled as she eyed herself in the mirror once she got into the bathroom and closed the door. It couldn't be normal what she was experiencing, it just couldn't. She didn't just want to screw his brains out.

Up until recently, she didn't quite get the meaning of meaningless sex: isn't all sex _sex_ whether it is with a loved one or someone you picked up at a bar?

The sex they had when she showed up drunk at his new place wasn't _meaningless_ and she was craving it so bad. She wanted to have _meaningful_ sex then cuddle with Jesse.

"Okay." She inhaled deeply. "It's okay. You just try not to think about him and you'll be good." Nope, saying it aloud didn't make her believe it. "And you won't drink. If you drink, you will be all over him and that's just pathetic and embarrassing. Besides your liver could use a break." She exhaled then took a couple of therapeutic breaths since she really didn't know what else to do.

"It's just a crush," she told herself. "No, it isn't," she backtracked in a whiny voice that she hadn't used since she was ten. "I need a drink—wait, no drinks… I'm so fucked," she sighed.

* * *

"Hey, bestie, there you are. Where have you been?"

"Around." She was actively avoiding him but she couldn't ignore him when they locked eyes.

"Amy was just telling me that you vetoed a bikini carwash," Jesse said as Beca sat down on the couch next to him and Fat Amy. "Why did you veto it? It's fun and it makes money."

"It also brings tons of creeps," she deadpanned. "And we're in November, you sure a carwash in a bikini is fun in freaking November?" She leaned forward and grabbed a couple of nachos from the plate that was on the coffee table to eat.

"So what? We can handle a bunch of perverts. As for the weather, we in Georgia how cold can it get down here," Fat Amy said in response.

"Actually campus security would do that for you," Jesse chimed in. "And, It snows down here."

"Yeah, but where the fun in that?" Fat Amy wondered. "As for the weather issue, we can just drink vodka or something."

"I didn't know there's supposed to be fun in beating people up, my bad," Jesse sarcastically said. "But good point there with the vodka for warmth."

"Oh, god, no," Beca mumbled under her breath when Cynthia Rose walked into the room holding a cake that was definitely not homemade, it looked professionally made—her guess was that they burned the cake they tried to make her then went and got one from a bakery, that if they did try to make one in the first place of course.

"What?" Jesse tilted his head to look at her.

"Nothing, I just hate this part," she told him and sat up when someone turned the lights off so the candles on the cake were the only source of illumination in the room.

He was going to ask for elaboration but he got it when everyone started singing the happy birthday song to Beca who just froze in her place with a grimace that was supposed to be a smile on her lips.

Jesse sang along and rubbed her back in an attempt to comfort her, only stopping to clap when she blew the candles.

Beca was so awkward it was adorable.

* * *

He didn't realize he was staring at her when she blew the candles until he saw the polaroid picture Benji took while Beca was blowing the candles later in the evening.

"These are all really good, Benji," Jesse said as he looked through the pictures Benji took throughout the night.

"Thanks," Benji beamed. "Beca took a lot of pictures on my birthday: I thought it would be nice if I did the same on her birthday."

He was so glad Benji caught the moment Beca walked through the door among other moments. "Aw, this is cute," he grinned finding a photo where Beca and Benji were making an X with their index fingers, displaying their tattoos, while trying to look mad at each other as if they were having a lightsaber battle.

"Yeah," Benji agreed. "It was Beca's idea."

"What was Beca's idea?" Beca peeked to look at the picture Jesse was holding. "Oh, that. Yep, that was my idea." She brought a forkful of cake to her mouth and sat on the arm of the couch.

"You really like your lightsaber tattoo," Jesse didn't see it coming but she seemed to dig it.

"I don't mind it. Besides, it's fun when strangers say space gibberish to me." She shrugged.

"It won't gibberish in a few days, though," Benji said.

"Wait, what? _You're_ going to watch Starwars? I am shocked." Beca simply rolled her eyes in response.

"You can come watch it with us if you want," Benji invited.

"I would love nothing more than to watch Starwars with you two. When are you doing this?" He looked at them.

"This weekend," Benji told him. "Probably at the Bellas' house." He glanced at Beca who nodded her head.

"You know what? You should come over to my place. I have both original and prequel trilogies. Wanna do this chronically or respect the release dates. I vote release dates."

"Who said anything about trilogies?" Beca mumbled through a mouthful of cake. "We're just gonna watch the first one this weekend." She kicked off her combat boots—it was way past midnight on a weeknight, most of the guests had left.

"Come on, you can't be serious. You can't just watch A New Hope," he said in disbelief. "Benji, back me up, man."

"Can't force Beca to watch all six movies."

"No, of course not. That's not what I meant." He paused and rolled his eyes when Beca gave him a look of disbelief. "Well, then you watch A New Hope and if you really like it you watch Empire Strikes Back and if you like it you watch Return of the Jedi."

"Fine, nerd." She sighed. "Just don't cry." She slapped the back of his neck playfully and went back to eating her cake.

She looked up when Stacie stopped not too far from where she was sitting and cursed under her breath seeing that her teammate was scanning through radio stations on the stereo, silently praying Stacie didn't settle for 95.7 aka WBUJ.

"Oh, I love this song," Jesse said when he heard _It Must Be Love_ by _Madness_ and sang along when Stacie turned the volume up a few notches.

Beca considered changing her prayers to no one noticing it's WBUJ and that the music playing had a very obvious theme then figured why ever bother when praying didn't work out the first time around.

"When are you going to open your presents, Beca?" Stacie asked. "It's just us now you won't have to pretend you like it if you don't."

Beca noticed then that everyone left and it was just the Bellas plus Benji and Jesse.

"Well, just us-ish," Stacie corrected herself, glancing at Jesse and Benji.

"And I'm out," Jesse chuckled, getting up.

"So am I," Benji followed in tow.

"I am seriously offended you both think I'd pretend to like your presents if I don't really like 'em," Beca said and put the plate of cake on the coffee table before she started making her way to where they kept the presents she received, glancing behind her when Jesse, Benji, and Stacie followed her.

She really wanted to see what Jesse got her but resisted the urge, sitting down Indian style on the floor and picking presents randomly.

"Keeping it classy, Stacie," Beca deadpanned, flipping the book Stacie got for her entitled How to Bonk in Public around to check the back cover.

"Always," Stacie grinned.

"Too Weird To Live, Too Rare To Die Tour," Beca read out loud from one of the two concert tickets. "This is awesome, Benji," she exclaimed, seeing that The Colourist, Junior Prom, and Panic! At the Disco were going to perform at the event in Atlanta GA on February 7th. "I love these bands."

"I figured from the music you play at the radio station," he smiled relieved she liked his present.

"I'm familiar with Panic at the Disco," Jesse began to say. "Are the other two up and coming or have been living under a rock?"

"No, they've been around. They're just indie," Beca answered with a shrug.

"WBUJ's slogan is music for the independent mind, they'd only play indie music if they could," Stacie chimed in.

"Tonight seems to be an exception," Cynthia Rose said overhearing them before she turned the volume up, jamming to _Nelly and Kelly Rowland_ 's _Dilemma._

"Eh, we took requests," Beca smoothly lied and was glad everyone seemed to buy it. "Dude, this must've cost you a shit ton of money," Beca said once she unwrapped the present Jesse got her to find the latest Native Instruments smart keyboard.

"Wanna try it out now?" Jesse asked, deciding to ignore her remark about the cost.

"Yes." She got up while Jesse picked the keyboard that was still in its box.

He followed her upstairs and to her room. "Put it on my bed until I figure out where to put it," she told him while she started her laptop.

She rapidly plugged the keyboard into her laptop and loudspeakers then rubbed her hands together. "Alright, what do I play?" she asked.

"What do you know how to play?" he asked back.

"Not to brag or anything but I can pick up the melody so if I know the song I can figure out the notes."

"You sound like you're bragging." He chuckled.

"Got a suggestion or not?"

"Okay…" he trailed off, thinking. " _Can't Help Falling in Love_ ," he suggested. "You know _Elvis'_ song?" he added, frowning at the blank look she had on her face.

"Yeah, I can play _Can't Help Falling in Love_ ," she grumbled. "Just give me a second," let out a breath then hummed it quietly before she started playing it.

"God, this song sounds awesome on the piano," Jesse noted, taking a seat on the floor next to Beca who was on her knees by the bed with her hands on the keyboard.

' _You have got to be fucking kidding me,'_ Beca internally groaned when Jesse started to sing the chorus once she got to it.

Why did he have to have amazing vocals that made her want to do dirty things to him more than anything else?

"I'm so jealous you can play by ear not just from memory," he stopped singing briefly to say.

"It's not that big of a deal when you regularly play the piano and, like, do it for fun." She shrugged, looking at him from the corner of her eyes when he got on his knees and tensed up when got too close.

"You play it really well but you're messing up a little here," he mumbled, resting his fingers on the keyboard to demonstrate.

She nodded and played what he just showed her correctly when he pulled his hand back.

"Damn, you're good," he mumbled and she couldn't help but smirk.

"Thanks." Beca tilted her head and instantly regretted it. The wise thing to do was to put some distance between them or just get the hell out of there to be safe and avoid the awkwardness that was bound to follow once she gave in and kissed him.

"This smart keyboard is really good. It sounds like an actual piano," Jesse noted.

"Uh huh," she absent-mindedly replied.

"Like, I thought about getting you a _piano_ then thought you'd appreciate a keyboard you can hook to your laptop and make music with more," he told her, playing a random combination of notes.

"I love it," she mumbled, fixating on his lips as she slowly gravitated towards him.

"You have cake frosting on your cheek," he said, tilting his head, and snapping her out of her very indecent thoughts.

Beca pulled her head back, feeling like an idiot for what she almost did but thankfully did not do.

"We should probably go downstairs," she mumbled as she used the sleeve of her sweatshirt to clean her cheek.

"Yeah," he nodded and got up, giving her his hand that she took.

"Thanks again for the keyboard."

"I'm so glad you like it. I struggle with buying presents for people I care about. It's so stressful and hard to find something both useful and meaningful."

She was starting to loathe that word, _meaningful_.

"You missed it," he told her and reached to clean the cake frosting himself, glancing behind her to look at the clock on her nightstand. "Wow, it's getting really late," he realized.

"Do you have something important to wake up for tomorrow?" Beca asked as she tried not to focus on how his touch made her feel.

"No," he answered. "I don't want to overstay my welcome." He shrugged. "I'll see if Benji wants a ride and head out."

"That won't be necessary The Trebles are our neighbors," she informed, tilting her head to look at the door when she heard a knock.

"You guys need anything? Some snacks, a condom, let me know?" Stacie who was at the door said quoting Regina George's mother from Mean Girls.

Unlike Jesse who chuckled, Beca didn't get the reference. "It's from Mean Girls, Beca," he informed and she nodded her head, following him out of her bedroom.

Beca walked Jesse to the door and pathetically melted into the hug he gave her, wishing it could last longer. "Night, weirdo," he mumbled into her hair, squeezing her tightly then pulling away.

"Night," she echoed, holding onto the doorknob and watching him make his way to his car before she closed the door.

"Aren't you gonna finish opening up your presents?" Fat Amy asked when Beca took a seat on the couch and resumed eating her piece of cake.

"I'll open the rest tomorrow," Beca replied. She decided to eat her feelings and think about what she was going to do next since busing herself and ignoring her feelings didn't do much.

Feeling a gaze on her, she tilted her head and found Benji, who was helping the girls clean, looking at her. He put the garbage bag in which he was putting used plastic plates on the floor and sat down next to her.

Benji awkwardly patted her thigh, failing to find comforting words, and then threw his arm around her shoulder when she leaned into his side.

"You were right, Benji," she told him, referring back to when he told her he thought she was falling for Jesse and she denied it.

"I know," he mumbled.

"Why did you say you believe me then?" She lifted her head to look at him.

"Because you didn't want to believe I was right," he said in response, smiling apologetically at her.

She sighed and filled her mouth with cake, resting her head against his shoulder.

"What are you gonna do about it?" he asked.

"Nothing," she answered after swallowing the cake.

"You're not gonna tell him?" She could hear the confusion in his voice.

"Nope," she curtly replied. "Want some?" She held the fork up, tilting head just enough she could see him, then brought it to her mouth when he shook his head.

* * *

AN: An almost 5k chapter all about Beca and her new feelings. I hope it entertained you. Feedback is very welcomed. Thanks for reading, folks!


	15. Chapter 15

"Humor me," Jesse said when Beca refused to wear the Darth Vader Christmas sweater.

"It's not even Christmas," she noted.

"So?" Jesse shrugged. "Benji is playing along why can't you?"

"Benji loves the sweater you got him."

"I really do. It's so awesome," Benji beamed, looking down at the sweater on which Yoda was printed sporting a Santa hat and had sentence ' _The season to be jolly it is'_ printed as well.

"Please?" Jesse pouted, giving Beca his puppy dog eyes, and earned an eye roll from Beca.

"Fine," she grumbled and took the sweater Jesse bought for her from him.

"Happy Sithmas, Beca." He grinned at Beca once she wore the sweater over her t-shirt.

"Let's just watch the movie and get it over with," Beca sighed then frowned at the look Benji and Jesse shared. "What? You're not gonna make me watch me all of them, are you? You can't keep me here against my will, Swanson, it's against the law!"

"Relax," Jesse said in response. "I wouldn't dare do that to you. I just want you to know that Sithmas is a thing now," he told her.

"What do you mean?" She adjusted the sweater after throwing her hair over her shoulders.

"Sithmas. Benji and I decided that we're making it an annual event. It's six days starting today it's all about Starwars. You're welcome to join us because it won't be just the movies. We're gonna bake Starwars themed cookies and play Starwars video games among other stuff. It's gonna be fun."

"It sure does sound like fun," she told him every one dripping with his sarcasm. "But I have a life, thanks."

Jesse shook his head in amusement. "I'm gonna go make popcorn. Benji, could you set the movie?"

"Yes, of course," Benji answered instantly and headed in the TV's direction while Beca trailed behind him, picking Thororeo, and taking a seat on the couch in the living room.

Beca didn't hate A New Hope and because Jesse bribed her with lasagna for dinner she agreed to watch the second film in the original trilogy but lost interest somewhere in the middle and not because of the movie itself. Jesse wasn't mouthing lines and dropping trivia and she had seen enough movies with him to know that it wasn't a good sign.

Distracted by Jesse, she could not bring herself to focus on the movie when he spent around five minutes staring at his phone with his lips pursed in a thin line, obviously angry about something.

Sitting between Benji and Jesse, Beca could look and see what he was staring at but it didn't feel right to sneak a peek. "I'm gonna go make more popcorn, don't pause," Jesse mumbled, grabbing the bowl, that Benji set on the coffee table, and stood up.

Benji oblivious to Jesse's change of mood, nodded absentmindedly. Meanwhile, Beca followed him with her eyes and couldn't help but get up after him.

"Ran out of popcorn? Don't take out on the bowl," she said, witnessing it when Jesse forcefully placed the bowl on the kitchen island. "I'll take that it's not the popcorn," she added when she saw the pack of popcorn kernels on the kitchen island.

"You okay there, nerd?" she asked when he leaned against the counter after he pulled a beer from the fridge.

"I think I just screwed everything up with Amber," he informed.

 _Amber._ Beca had been heard a lot of this woman from Jesse who was so into her it's was disgusting and adorable at the same time.

"What happened?" she asked, sure her voice was even and wouldn't betray her because the woman's name sparked nothing but jealousy within Beca.

He took a sip of beer before he answered, "She told me she's planning to move out of the small town she lives at. I suggested she'd come down here since she didn't have a clear destination and just wanted as far away from Idaho as possible. Barden is far enough, right?" Beca nodded at his question when he paused.

"She told me she'd think about it… this happened a few days after I ran that thought I had by you. Remember when I asked if you thought I should invite her to fly over for a few days?" Beca nodded again.

Of course, she remembered, she remembered a lot from that day.

"I decided not to invite her over since she might move here altogether." He took another sip of beer before he set the bottle down and proceeded to make popcorn.

"Did she decide not to move here?" Beca guessed.

"Her sister lives in Ohio and she's _strongly_ considering moving there."

"Oh."

"There's more. She also got pissed at me when I offered to help her financially when she told me she wanted to go back to school. Accused me of trying to buy her affection." He chuckled humorlessly. "What's wrong with wanting to help?" he grumbled, closing the microwave a little too forcefully.

"Nothing is wrong with wanting to help," Beca replied carefully. "But it doesn't mean you should help." Noting the frown that formed on his forehead she continued, saying, "Jesse, you want those you care about to be _happy_ … solve their problems and like be a better version of themselves," she sighed.

"Yes, that's exactly what I want, what's wrong with that?" he asked.

"Don't you think that it's not exactly your job?" She grimaced and saw puzzlement on Jesse's face. "Yes, you can help and have the solution to the problem but it's not your problem, is it?" He shook his head. "Unless a person explicitly asks for help you shouldn't fix their problems for them. It can come off as infuriating. It can seem like you don't trust them to figure it out by themselves," she explained and saw how his confusion was replaced by a thoughtful look as he nodded.

It was probably the only thing wrong with Jesse and it wasn't even _that_ wrong.

"Sometimes you just gotta step back." She shrugged.

"I know, I know. I just forget to do that sometimes…" It was so hard to step back and let Beca figure things out on her own when she was fighting with her parents but he managed to do it, he didn't know why he couldn't do it with Amber. "How do I fix this?" He scratched his head, gripping his hair before he gulped down some beer.

"Just tell her she misunderstood your intentions. If I were you, in order to change her mind about moving to _Ohio_ and come here instead I'll just have to sell her Barden… use a PowerPoint presentation." She smiled when he let out a small laugh. "I can help you out if you want. Barden is Dubai in comparison with that shithole Ohio."

Beca didn't know how to deal with her feelings but knew how to be a good friend. And, a good friend would help their friend be with who they liked.

Whenever her mind wandered, she would think of Jesse but it didn't mean she wanted to pursue anything with him.—not that she didn't imagine how it would be like if she did actually pursue something with him. Her imagination was pretty neat but it wasn't enough for her to go for it.

To sum it up: Beca was falling in love with him and wanted him badly yet didn't want to date him because she was ridiculously afraid of commitment and rejection.

"Ohio isn't that bad, Becs," Jesse told her. "But I'll definitely let you know if I ended up going forward with the PowerPoint presentation."

* * *

A few days later, Beca received a text from Jesse telling her that he wanted help with the PowerPoint presentation because he fell short of reasons to pick Barden over Ohio.

"What are you watching?" Stacie questioned as she tossed her jacket on the arm of the chair.

"We're marathoning Friday thirteenth movies," Fat Amy answered her.

"Why?" Stacie frowned. "It's neither October nor is it a Friday thirteen."

"We need new hobbies, that's why," Beca answered, who was obviously rooting for Jason, her eyes never leaving the screen as Jason murdered some nameless one-dimensional chick.

"I'll get it," Stacie told them hearing knocking on the door.

"Does napping count as a hobby?" Cynthia Rose wanted to know.

"Yep," Fat Amy and Beca answered in unison.

"Well, I'm gonna get into it," CR yawned, stretching before she got up.

"Benji, hey," Beca greeted spotting her next-door neighbor and supposedly rival.

"Beca," he smiled nervously.

"What's up?" She sat up.

"Yeah, what brings you to the Bellas' mansion?" Fat Amy asked.

"Um." The boy scratched his temple. "I kinda need your help with something," he told Beca, meeting her gaze.

"What kind of help? I'm getting serious Veronica Mars vibes. If so I'm down," Stacie chimed in.

"We both are," Fat Amy nodded. "Who are we exposing, Benji?"

"Ignore them," Beca was saying as she got up, gesturing for him to follow her as she headed to the kitchen. "Beer?"

"Yeah, sure." She heard him say and grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge.

"So," he cleared his throat, accepting the beer from her. "There's this girl," he began to say and got red once the words left his mouth and the rest came out as a jumble of words that sounded nothing like English.

"Benji," Beca called, resting her hand on his shoulder. "Breathe and form simple sentences, okay?" She patted his shoulder and smiled at him when he nodded and blew a breath.

"Janice from Into to Philosophy, remember her?" he asked unsure she would because she rarely attended the course since the professor rarely counted attendance.

"Yeah." She didn't remember Janice, she just wanted him to keep talking.

"Ran into her the other day at the library. She asked if I wanted to hang out sometimes. I said yes. I didn't know she meant it as a date. Not until today because she texted me." He reached into his pocket and pulled his phone to show her. Beca accepted his phone and leaned against the counter to read their exchange.

"Oh, I know this place," she told him. "It's fancy." Beca looked up from his phone. "How can I help?"

"I've never taken a girl out before." He chuckled humorlessly.

"It's fine, Benji. I've never been on a date either." She shrugged.

"Because you don't want to go on dates not because no one wants to go out with you," he mumbled.

It was more than simply not wanting to go on dates but she wasn't going to correct him.

"You want me to help you get ready?" she figured.

"Yeah, and like tell me what sort of stuff I should talk to her about. If you have time, of course."

"I was watching Friday thirteenth when you came, Benji. I clearly have a lot of time." She gulped down some beer. "But you only have two hours so let's get cracking, shall we?"

"Thanks, Beca." He grinned.

"Do I need to get a camera or would our phones suffice for the investigation?" Stacie, who had taken Beca's spot on the couch near Fat Amy, questioned when they came into the room.

"We're not going to track anyone down," Beca told her friend, picking up her combat boots before she sat down to wear them.

"Bummer," Fat Amy sighed. "Well, what is it then?"

"I have a date tonight and Beca is helping me get ready," Benji spoke when Beca kept quiet.

"Who's the lucky girl?" Fat Amy wondered. "It's a girl, right?"

"Yes, a girl," Benji nodded his head. "I don't think you know her; Janice."

"I'm gonna need a full name, Treble. Since you're Beca's friend, we shall do a full background check on her arse."

"Janice Tompson," Benji hesitantly shared. "Thanks?"

"What are you wearing?" Stacie went on to ask.

"I don't know. That's partially why I'm here." He scratched the back of his neck, feeling uncomfortable with the way Stacie was looking at him.

"You need to show off that ass," she told him. "Wear a shirt that brings out your eyes. Shave the sideburns. And, do something to your hair." She tilted her hair to look at Beca. "Whatcha think, Becs?"

"Huh?" Beca looked away from Benji's face. "Yeah, sounds good."

"Oh my god, you were totally staring at his lips," Stacie was quick to notice.

"Yes but not for the reason currently in your mind," Beca answered. "I was just wondering about Benji's kissing game." She felt bad for putting him on the spot but she wasn't going to let the girls have anything to tease her about. "Do you think you're a good kisser, Benji?" Her question was met with a string of incoherent words from Benji ended when Stacie kissed him, taking the boy by surprise and not holding back.

"Yeah, he's good," Stacie announced, pulling away."I bet he's also good in the sack," she added, running her hand up his chest. "Statistically, nerds are almost always good in the sack."

"Okay, I don't want to see you prove that so you're backing off now, Stacie," Beca told her friend before she reached and peeled Stacie away from Benji.

* * *

The walk to the trebles' house was less than two minutes long and once they stepped foot inside the house, Beca remembered why she rarely hung out there. There was porn playing on the big flat screen in the living room in the middle of the day while some of the trebles sat in the Jacuzzi they had installed right in the middle of the living room.

"Do you want something to drink or eat?" Benji asked and Beca shook her head before she took the stairs. He brought a couple of bags of chips and coke cans from the kitchen anyway.

"The restaurant is pretty fancy which means you shouldn't wear a printed t-shirt," she said once he joined her in his room. "Stacie's right about wearing a shirt that brings out your eyes…" Beca trailed off, opening his closet. "What color are they?" she asked, realizing she didn't exactly know the color of Benji's eyes.

"Grey-ish," he answered and held a can of coke towards her.

Beca took the coke and step closer to him, tiptoeing to get a better look at his eyes. "There's some green in there, too… you have really pretty eyes, Benji," she complimented. It wasn't just the color, the shape of his eyes was also pretty. And, up until now, she never noticed how long his eyelashes were.

Falling back on her heels, she popped the can open, and turned back to his closet.

"Thanks, Beca," he smiled shyly at her compliment and rubbed the back of his neck.

"This is should work," she told him, pulling a steel grey shirt. "Might need a little ironing. You guys have an iron?"

"Yeah, I think we do. I'll go see." He left the room while Beca looked for pants that would go well with the shirt and settled for a pair of dark jeans.

She placed the clothes on the bed then took a seat on his desk's chair, grabbing one of the chips bags and opening it.

"Found it," Benji announced as he walked through the threshold.

"Great." Beca looked up and watched Benji plug the iron into the power outlet near his bed. "So, why on earth would you want first date advice from a person that never went on a date in her life?" she asked as he placed his shirt properly on the bed before he ironed it.

He shrugged. "I know you will genuinely try to give advice on how I should behave regardless of your lack of experience in that area."

"Well, I wouldn't hold my breath, but here goes," she deadpanned, grabbing a Darth Maul action figure from his desk. "Don't start off with Starwars, you won't shut up about it and we want her to get to know you and vice versa. Spending the whole time fanboying over Starwars won't let that happen." She clicked her tongue.

Benji nodded in agreement and reached for the iron to start ironing his shirt.

"Ask her about herself, her interests, favorites, if she's a cat person or a dog person, you know whatever keeps the conversation going." She leaned against the chair, playing with the action figure.

"If she says or does something you don't agree with speak up." She paused to think of other things to bring to Benji's attention. "Try not to forget how to breathe. I know you tend to get anxious about _everything_ but she asked you out so she must _really_ like you." Benji was very likable and cute, he didn't seem to see it but Beca did and so must've Janice. "So, yeah, don't let your anxiety get the best of you and have fun." She smiled at him.

"I will," he beamed. "So, how have you been, Becs?" he asked.

"Fine." She shrugged. "I've been trying to drink more water throughout the day and I really feel better. I mean I have to use the bathroom a lot but I can feel my organs celebrating so it's worth it."

She had been drinking less liquor and more water: her body appreciate it and so did her wallet.

"Oh, that's good to hear." He paused and Beca could tell he was trying to think of a way to make a transition to how she felt about Jesse. He thought she should either tell Jesse or stop being friends with him and had been trying to tell her that for a while. She knew he was trying to bring it up because she had successfully dodged the topic every single time he tried.

Beca didn't want to talk about it because it frustrated her and the ultimatum didn't sound appealing. She knew Benji was just trying to be a good friend: he didn't annoy her with his, so far unsuccessful, attempts.

"Where are you spending winter's break?" Benji asked as he watched Beca turn around in his desk chair so he could change into his 'date clothes.'

"In Michigan with my grandmother," she answered automatically.

"You gonna drive up there?"

"I might. I don't know." She shrugged and pulled her phone from her pocket when it chimed with a text to find out that it was from Jesse informing her that the PowerPoint presentation she had helped him make worked.

She was happy for him. She really was. She wasn't even sure why it made her so upset to know that the woman, that Jesse had been rambling about for a while and really wanted to move to Barden so that he could peruse something her, was going to move to Barden.

Beca shot Jesse a quick reply telling him _he's very welcome_ and tossed her phone on the desk.

"What do you think?" She heard Benji ask and spun the chair around in order to face him, forcing a smile on her face.

"You look awesome, Benji," she told him and she meant it.

He beamed before he got a good a look at her and frowned. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she lied. "Let's talk about what happens after your date ends."

If he didn't believe her when she told him that nothing was wrong, Benji didn't voice it. He just listened to her give her so-called advice and nodded along.

* * *

Beca went back to the Bellas' house right after finishing with Benji and found the girls still watching Friday 13th. She suggested they played a drinking game and they naturally agreed. Liquor made everything better. Beca had been so good to her liver and felt entitled to get hammered.

"Would you guys fuck Jason?" Stacie asked after taking a sip of beer. "I would."

"No, I wouldn't fuck a psychotic maniac," Beca answered. "Besides, isn't he dead?"

"For me, the dead part is the deal breaker," Fat Amy told them. "For all, we know his dick could have worms."

"Eh, I'll still do him." Stacie shrugged.

"We know, Stacie. You'd do anyone… dead or alive apparently," Fat Amy noted.

"Touché," Stacie grinned.

"There must be a deal breaker. You can't want to hump anything you lay eyes on, Stacie," Beca said.

"Yeah, you're right, I wouldn't have sex with a Nickelback fan," Stacie replied earning a chuckle from Beca. "Ugh, talking about sex is making me wanna have sex." She reached for her phone and unlocked it going into her contact list. "Let's see who's up for some," she muttered.

"How many fuck buddies do you have?" Beca asked, bringing her beer to her lips.

"Fifteen? Maybe sixteen. I don't know. I cut 'em off as soon as they start asking if I could stay for breakfast. So, I don't know. But it's in that range."

"How do you do it without catching feelings?" Beca then questioned, making sure to come off casual and not too curious.

"They're just dicks. I don't even remember their actual names."

Beca nodded, realizing that she did the whole fuck buddy thing wrong. Jesse wasn't a nameless guy she boned and that was probably why she fell in love with him.

"This has been fun but I'm off to get some real fun," Stacie told the two as she reached for her shoes.

"Be safe," Beca called after her once she reached the front door. "You're going out, too?" she wondered when Fat Amy grabbed her own shoes and wore them.

"Yeah, I'm craving a smoothie."

"A smoothie? Now?"

"Yes, there's a good place downtown." Fat Amy threw on her jacket. "Bye."

"Bye," Beca echoed as her friend made her way to the door and brought the beer she was holding to her lips, chugging what was left in one breath and deciding to finish watching the movie then go to bed.

She didn't even realize she was alone in the house until she got up to get more beer and it made her feel lonely. Not to confuse her loneliness with fear, because she wasn't afraid of being alone. She just didn't want to be alone. She could do something about since it was Friday and there was definitely a few parties on campus she could crash but she didn't want that.

Hopping on the couch, she grabbed her phone to send out a text to Benji to see if his date ended then ask if he'd like and watch Friday 13th movies with her and tell her all about her date. When he didn't reply right away, she assumed he was still with his date and scrolled down her texts only to find an unanswered text from Pete, the intern. He was telling her about a friend of his that happened to be a DJ who was wondering if he could play his music in the night slots.

 _Beca: 'Bring some of his stuff.'_

She was drunk but not enough to forget how to do her job. She wasn't going to agree right away. She had to listen to this DJ's music sober then decide.

 _Pete: 'Are you at the radio station? I have a flash drive full of his remixes. Do you want me to bring it now?'_

 _Beca: 'No, I'm home. But if you want you can drop it off.'_

It was so unnecessary to say that and she knew it.

 _Pete: 'I'll be there in 10 minutes tops.'_

She could have told him to show it to her next Monday but she didn't. She was feeling a tad lonely and he was fun—she wasn't very sure of that but she was drunk, everything was fuzzy, she assumed he was fun.

Beca figured she'd order pizza and invite him to stay and dine with her. They could talk trash about Friday 13th and get trashed together… She was already trashed but it didn't matter he could get to her level, there was enough beer.

* * *

AN: So far the reviews have been positive. Most of you dig direction of the story has taken and I don't wanna screw it up.

With what I have planned for this story, I think the slow burn is gonna be worth it. I mean I don't wanna bore you out but just know that I want them to get together when they're ready to be together and not because they wanna be together— if that even makes sense— so yeah, bare with me.

Thank you for stopping by and leaving your feedback, it's so awesome.


	16. Chapter 16

AN: Hello, person reading this. I haven't dropped this story or any of the incomplete stuff I have on here, I just lose the will to live all together let alone write sometimes but let's not get into that. I hope you're doing well. I also hope you enjoy this chapter.

* * *

When she heard a knock on the door, she groaned, "Go away!"

"I'll come over later," Benji mumbled. "Text me when you're feeling better and are in the mood for learning." He scratched his head while looking at the notes he was holding in his hand. "I got you tacos… if you feel like eating them." Tacos were the only thing she'd eat when she's hungover and not feel nauseated.

"No, Benji." She pushed herself up, just enough her head was no longer under the covers. "Stay," she said, struggling to keep her eyes open. "I thought you were Amy. She's been trying to talk me into drinking some weird cocktail she made and claims is a cure for hangovers." She sat up and tried to calm her hair down.

"Here you go." He held the bag her way.

"Thank you." She accepted and watched him pull her desk chair and take a seat. "Tell me about your date," she mumbled, biting into the taco.

"It went really well," he beamed.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, Janice is super cool and funny."

"That's awesome. Did you ask her out on a second date?" From the change in his expression, she knew the answer. "It's okay, Benji. You can ask her later."

"Okay, good," he said in relief. "So, did you end up going out last night?"

She closed her eyes momentarily before she answered. "Nope."

"What?" Benji questioned, frowning as he eyed his friend when she stopped chewing and zoned out.

"What what?" she said, snapping out of her thoughts.

"You zoned out," he pointed out.

Beca leaned against the headboard and took a deep breath after swallowing what was left of the taco. "Pete came over last night," she began to say.

"You hooked up with Pete," Benji figured not hiding his surprise.

"Worse." She paused, tilting her head to look at him. "I threw up on him while making out." The thought of vomit made her want to vomit, she wasn't sure she wanted to eat the second taco Benji bought for her.

"That's unfortunate but it's not so bad," Benji pointed out.

The embarrassment was too real. She slid down and pulled her duvet over her head in shame.

"Beca, I'm sure Pete is cool with it. It's not like you wanted to puke on him."

She peeked her head. "Dude, he was disgusted."

Benji felt bad for her and had no idea how to make her feel better. "So, what happened next?" He was curious.

"What do you think happened next?" she snorted. "He left." She was glad he did, the reason sucked, but she was glad they didn't end up hooking up. She knew she would have regretted it.

"What was he even doing here?"

She sighed, eyeing the ceiling. "I asked him to come over." When Benji said nothing in response, she felt super judged despite knowing that Benji wouldn't judge her, so she went ahead and tried to explain herself. "The girls were out. I had been drinking and he was available to hang out. Wasn't even planning to hook up with him. It just happened… well, almost happened."

"It's not the worst thing that could have happened, you know? Just saying, could have been worse."

"Like what? I could have puked up on him twice?" she deadpanned and he laughed. She pulled the second taco from the bag and brought it to her mouth while still laying on her back. "Hey, how did you know I'm hungover?"

"Amy told me," he let her know.

Beca nodded then reached for her phone that was right by her side feeling it vibrate. One look at the screen had her groaning.

"What?" Benji wondered, slightly worried.

"I'm having lunch with Dad and I totally forgot about it." She pushed herself into a sitting position and cleared her throat before she picked up. "Hey, dad," she greeted and pushed her duvet aside only to pull it back remembering that she wasn't wearing pants. She and Benji were pals but not the kind that would walk around each other in their underwear.

" _Hey, kiddo_." She heard her old man say in response.

"I know I'm running late. It's just that I forgot to set the alarm clock. I'll be there in half an hour tops, promise." It wasn't a lie but it wasn't the complete truth either.

He sighed in response. _"Alright, Becs. Just drive safe."_

"Yeah, see you in thirty." Hanging up, she tossed her phone aside. "So sorry, Benji," she apologized.

"It's fine. We'll study later."

"Yeah," she agreed.

* * *

Grateful a beanie was an option thanks to the cold weather, Beca wore one to avoid having to do something about her hair after she showered and used the blow dryer to dry it. She wore some clothes and rushed out of the house to go meet her father for lunch, which was something they tried to do biweekly yet she seemed to forget about it every single time.

Dr. Mitchell was on his phone when she entered the restaurant. She took off the unnecessary sunglasses she was wearing and made her way towards him—it was cloudy yet opening her eyes was a challenge.

He looked up and smiled when she pulled her chair. "Sorry, I'm late."

"It's okay," he said in response and watched her as she set her sunglasses on the table. "I actually answered some e-mails while waiting for you."

"Cool." She sat down.

"You look nice, Becs," he said, getting a good look at her.

She thought he was being sarcastic at first but realized soon enough that he was being genuine.

"Thanks." She reached for the menu and opened it. "I'm not that hungry, I think I'm gonna go with a salad," she decided. "What are you having?"

"The house special."

"Dad, you always get the special when we come here. Have you ever tried something else?" she wondered.

"I just happen like their special." He shrugged.

"Hi, are you ready to order?" the waiter asked, stopping by their table.

"Yes," Dr. Mitchell affirmed. "I'll have the house special, please."

The waiter nodded and wrote it down on his notepad before tilting her head to look at Beca.

"Just a salad for me," Beca told him.

"How are you doing, Becs?" Dr. Mitchell asked as the waiter left their table. "Midterms are coming up soon," he noted. "Are you ready for those?"

She inhaled sharply before she answered, "Yep." She was juggling a lot and was trying to squeeze in some studying because she wanted to pass the semester.

"Good. That's good. So, I've been thinking lately about how we haven't spent Christmas together in years," Dr. Mitchell said next. "And, how we should do something about that."

"I can't let Nana spend Christmas alone, Dad."

"I know that." He paused. "I thought we could _all_ spend it over at Grandma's."

"Oh." Yep, she was surprised. "That could be nice."

"Yeah, Mom thinks so, too."

"Mom as in Nana or my actual mother?" Beca said in confusion.

Dr. Mitchell usually referred to his mother as Grandma unless he was addressing her directly.

"Your mother said she'd fly over for Christmas," he told her.

"I'm sensing a _but_ coming," Beca noted.

He sighed, "But she's not sure she's welcome."

"That's bullshit. Of course, she's welcome." Beca found herself rolling her eyes.

"She wants to hear it from Grandma," he told her.

"Nana won't say no, you know?"

"I know." He paused. "Your mother feels bad for not showing _enough_ gratitude towards Grandma for practically raising you and is afraid Grandma holds it against her."

' _More like any gratitude,'_ Beca wanted to say but didn't. "I'll talk to Nana." She sighed when he gave her a pointed look. "And, mom, I guess." She was low-key excited about spending the holidays with her entire family but didn't want to get her hopes up because it was very likely to turn out super awkward.

Speaking of super awkward, Beca knew she was going to feel it the next time she saw Pete, which was going to be Monday.

Her plan was to ignore him and pretend nothing happened and hope he did the same.

* * *

Beca was right about things being awkward with Pete next time she saw him… She was wrong about it being on Monday, though.

"Pete?" she called in surprise spotting him in front of the Bellas' house blowing into his hands for warmth. ' _Why didn't he just knock, the girls would have let him in?_ ' she wondered.

"Beca, hi," he greeted, sniffling.

"What's up?" she slowly asked as she got closer to the house. The tone of her voice was super _chill_ despite the amount of embarrassment she was feeling thanks to the flashes going through her mind from the night before.

"I-uh." He paused then let out a nervous chuckle. "Last night… I shouldn't have left like that."

"Don't worry about it. It's fine," she replied not wanting to talk about it.

"No, it's not. I left you alone. You could have had alcohol poisoning or like puked again and chocked on it…" he trailed off before he blew a breath.

She shifted her weight on her right leg in discomfort because she _really_ didn't want to think about it let alone talk about it.

"And, I bailed instead of sticking around and making sure you're okay."

Yeah, it was shitty that he left but he had no obligation to stay.

"Dude, it's really fine." She shrugged. "I'm not holding it against you."

"Cool, cool, cool," he said while nodding his head and sniffling. "Well, you're alive!" he let out a nervous chuckle before he cleared his throat. "I'll see on Monday." He awkwardly waved at her before he began walking away.

"I appreciate you coming to check if I'm still alive," she let him know and watched him stop in his tracks, he happened to be a couple of feet away from her when he did.

The conversation was painfully awkward and she really didn't want things to be awkward between them: they worked together: they needed to put what happened behind them and move on.

He was about to say something when a very aggressive sneeze interrupted him, a sneeze that was right in her face.

"Shit, I'm sorry," he apologized immediately.

"It's okay." She used the back of her sleeve to clean her face, trying not to think of all the germs that he sneezed on her.

"No, it really isn't. I'm not feeling well and now you're gonna get sick, too."

"Last night I puked on you and today you sneezed on me and I'm probably gonna catch a cold from your nasty fluids," she noted. "Guess this evens things out." Although, technically if she was going to catch something from him the exchange of saliva from the night before would guarantee that.

"Well, _last night_ you didn't just throw up on me so I'm not sure if we're really even," he said in response, there was still some awkwardness and nervousness but nonetheless his tone was undoubtedly flirtatious.

"About that," she began to say uneasily. "I wouldn't have done that if I wasn't drunk."

"Oh, okay," he said in response, sounding a little deflated.

She soon realized that the way she worded her lack of interest in him might have hurt his feelings and quickly added. "It's not that I don't like you because I do _platonically_ and would like it if we kept it that way."

Pete nodded in response, a polite smile on his lips. "Of course," he replied.

* * *

Benji looked up from his notes and at the time and decided a break was due. He tilted his head to look at Beca who was laying on her stomach on her bed surrounded by different notes as well as her laptop while she stared into nothing.

"Penny for your thoughts?" He leaned against the chair and watched as Beca snapped out of her thoughts.

"Just thinking about Christmas." She shrugged, looking through the different notes aimlessly. She was glad Benji bought what she told him—or at least pretended he did. There was a lot more going through her mind that she'd rather keep to herself.

"What about it?" he wondered.

"Dad wants us all to spend it together which is gonna be a first. I'm trying to wrap my mind around it," she shared with him.

Benji nodded. "I'm sure it'll turn out great," he optimistically said. "I never celebrated it myself but I hear it's _the most wonderful time of the year_ ," he sang.

"Yeah," she chuckled. "It sure is." She grabbed a pencil and began doodling on a paper—she didn't feel like studying but she made plans with Benji to study together and couldn't bail on him because she knew that there was no way he could get any work done at the Trebles' house, the boys were chaotic.

He smiled warmly at her and watched her expression turn thoughtful again, only this time she was looking at him.

"Wanna come home with me for Christmas?" she wondered. "I can't promise you the most wonderful time of the year, though." She really believed it was going to be the most awkward gathering ever. "But Canada is pretty close and the legal age of drinking is eighteen there," she added.

"I don't know," he said, considering it. "Wouldn't I be intruding? You said it's going to be the first time you guys will spend together."

"No, you wouldn't be intruding." She grabbed her phone feeling it vibrate. "It won't be family members exclusive, Amy is coming." She swiped to unlock the screen of her cellphone seeing that it was Jesse that texted her.

"Oh, then sure I'd love to come," Benji said accepting her invitation.

"Awesome," she said meeting his gaze before she checked the text she received.

' _What happened?'_ she quickly typed finding a photo of Thororeo wearing an Elizabethan collar around its neck with the caption _'look who got himself in the cone of shame.'_

' _He got out of the house and some stray cat beat him.'_ Jesse's text came fast. ' _The vet prescribed him a collar so that he wouldn't scratch the wound on his neck._ '

' _Poor thing.'_ She scrolled up and eyed the photo he sent her some more, she cared about the cat more than she thought she ever would. ' _He looks miserable,_ ' she noted.

' _I Know. He really hates the cone. And, I'm so close to removing it from around his neck._ '

' _You are not gonna do that.'_

' _I think I might.'_ He attached another photo of Thororeo.

' _Do you want me to take Thoroero until he heals?_ ' she suggested, knowing that Jesse was very serious.

' _The girls wouldn't mind?_ '

' _Nope._ '

' _I'm a terrible parent. Thank you._ '

' _You're welcome.'_

' _You're not gonna acknowledge the former part of my previous text?'_

' _Am I supposed to tell you that you're not a shitty parent for wanting to take off the one that will help your cat get better because he looks sad?'_

' _Yep.'_

' _Noted. Well, I wouldn't call you a terrible parent. Trust me, I know terrible parenting.'_

' _I just made you feel like shit, didn't I? First Thororeo and now you. I'm a terrible person.'_

'Dude, chill out.' It sucked that her parents weren't _that_ great but things were getting better. Thinking about her family didn't upset her as much as it used to. ' _You're the least terrible person I know_.'

' _Aw, Becs, that's the sweetest thing you ever said to me sober_. _You're hella sweet when you're drunk._ '

Okay, that last part there got her heart racing because 'what in the fuck?'

She tried to think of the times she complimented Jesse when she had a few drinks and nothing really stood out as _sweet_.—she remembered complimenting his ass drunk off her ass but that wasn't sweet.

A dreaded thought crossed her mind and she hoped she was wrong.

She quickly checked her log history and found a phone call she made to Jesse the night before. A phone call that lasted thirty fucking minutes and that she remember zero minutes of.

She was beginning to loathe alcohol because not only she puked on Pete while making but she also drunk dialed Jesse afterward and god knows what she talked to him about—well, she probably said something that counted as _sweet_ in Jesse's books.

"Beca," Benji called. "Is everything okay?" he asked, noticing the change in her expression.

"Uh-Huh." She nodded. "Why wouldn't everything be okay? Everything is perfect!" She ran her fingers through her hair before she grabbed a pillow and groaned into it.

Benji thought she should stop hanging out with Jesse if she wasn't going to tell him how she felt about him and she was starting to see his point.


	17. Chapter 17

AN: The response the previous chapter got was pretty dope. Thank you for all of your feedback. I won't drag this for too long as I need certain things to happen. And, we're getting there. Slowly but surely. Let me know what you think of this chapter in a review, you have no idea how much your feedback helps.

* * *

Jesse always knew the Bellas were amazing simply because they were Beca's friends and she considered them family. But having spent time with them, he got what Beca meant when she described them as amazing but in small doses.

They sure were a handful. And, he was only there for an hour top every other day to visit his cat.

"What's that smell?" he asked, sniffing the air while he played with Thororeo.

Cynthia Rose who was in the living room with him shrugged, her eyes glued to the TV.

He got up to investigate himself, following the smell. "Shit," he cursed, entering the kitchen when he saw smoke coming out of the oven and rushed towards it.

It smelled like burned candy when he opened the oven to pull whatever it was that burnt.

He was pretty confused when he found a pizza.

He was unlocking the window to air the room when Stacie entered the kitchen.

"What happened in here?" she asked before her eyes fell on the burnt pizza.

"Someone forgot they were making pizza."

"Are those gummy bears?" she wondered then grabbed a fork to pick up one of the gummy bears that served as the topping. "This is disgusting," she noted.

"Who do you think did this?" Jesse asked, leaning against the kitchen island.

"Oh, it's Fat Amy for sure," Stacie confidently said before she dropped the fork in the sink.

Jesse watched Stacie reach for the cupboard to get herself a glass and only then realized that she was wearing an oversized sweatshirt, that got pulled up when she lifted her arm, and knee-high socks.

He immediately looked away because he wasn't going to look at her butt.

"Hey, Jesse, what did you study in college?" she asked, placing the glass she drank in back in the cupboard.

"I majored in finance," he answered, tilting his head to look her.

"Did you take advanced algebra?" she wondered.

"Yep," he nodded.

"I'm taking this exam I found online as practice for my exam and I've hit a brick wall," she explained as they walked out of the kitchen.

"I'd love to take a look at it." Out of all of the Bellas, Stacie was the last person Jesse thought would be taking advanced algebra.

"What are you majoring in Stacie," he wondered.

"Naval engineering," she answered and tilted her head hearing someone get in.

"Wow!" he exclaimed. "That is one hell of a major." He tilted his head as well. "Hey, Becs," he greeted watching the five-foot-two captain of the Bellas step through the door.

"Hi," she said, sounding raspy.

"You alright there?" he asked quickly noticing how pale she looked.

"Coming down with a cold," she explained, rubbing her temples.

"Want me to take you to see a doctor," Jesse offered. If it were to him he'd take her right away because he didn't like taking risks but as long as she didn't show sever symptoms it was her choice.

"No, it's not that bad." She began making her way up the stairs. "I'll just pop a couple of painkillers and sleep it off."

* * *

Jesse helped Stacie out with the math problem she had trouble solving then decided to check on Beca.

"How are you feeling?" he asked as he stood in the doorway.

"Like shit," she answered before she blew her nose into a tissue.

Standing by her bed, he extended his hand and pressed it against her forehead. "Jesus, Beca, you're boiling," he mumbled, moving his hand to cup her cheek.

He wasn't overreacting: she was really, really hot.

"Your hand is cold," she mumbled back.

"You guys have a thermometer here?" he asked, removing his hand.

She shook her head, looking away to cough.

"It's been over an hour since you got home, the pills you took should have worked their magic by now." He frowned when she got into a coughing fit. "Whatever it is you caught is anything but a cold," he told her. "You need medical attention. I can't give you that but I can and _will_ take you to see someone who can."

"Jesse," she called, sighing.

"Save your energy," he said, looking around the room for her coat.

With her coat in one hand, he stood by her bed and waited, unfazed by her death glare.

"Fine," she huffed, pushing the duvet aside.

* * *

He was right, she didn't catch a cold. She had the flu but he wasn't going to rub the fact that he was right in her face. She was too ill and didn't need to hear it.

"I won't take long," Jesse said as he undid his seatbelt.

Beca nodded in response before she rested her head against the window and closed her eyes.

Other than the drugs the doctor prescribed her, Jesse needed to purchase vegetables in order to make his family's infamous Super Soup. He also had to get her other home remedies for the flu. She got sick in a very shitty time. She had her midterms going on and needed to get better quickly.

Chloe once told him he was a nurse in a past life and he humbly agreed.

* * *

"Jesse, _seriously_ go home," Beca was saying as Jesse stepped into the room holding a tray.

"Rude," he said in mock-offense to which she rolled her eyes.

"I took the meds," she stated. "You don't have to do _this._ "

"You mean the soup?" he guessed. "I love making soup. And, I love nursing people back to health," he added.

He placed the tray on her lap once she sat up. "I just talked to Amy. She said she won't sleep in the same room as you while you're sick," he informed and heard her mutter, "bitch."

"So you better get used to having me as a roommate until you kick this flu out of your system." He sat down on her desk's chair.

"You can't be serious," she said in response.

"I'm very serious."

"Dude, no!"

"Beca," he called, scooting in the chair until he was beside her bed. "I'm not leaving, accept that. There's nothing you could say— _because let's face it there's nothing you can do when you're this weak_ —that could make me change my mind about staying over until you get better." He shrugged.

"Super Soup is better eaten when hot," he pointed out when she kept glaring at him.

* * *

Jesse had a mug of tea in his hand when he entered the room as well as a thermometer that he bought when he went to purchase the prescribed drugs. He put the tea on her desk and turned on his heels. "What's that you're working on?" he assumed she was studying for an exam.

"I'm just checking my exams schedule," she told him, glancing up when he stood by her bed.

She rolled her eyes when she saw a thermometer in his left hand but said nothing. Instead, she just opened her mouth just enough he could put the thermometer under the tip of her tongue in order to read her temperature.

He pulled the thermometer away once it beeped.

"What's the verdict, Nurse Swanson?" Beca deadpanned. "Am I on my death bed?"

Her temperature was still higher than what it should be but it wasn't too high he'd drag her to the hospital again. He just had to keep an eye on her during the night, which was why he was spending the night over in the first place.

"No, you're just on your bed." He picked the mug up and handed it to her.

"Thank you," she said accepting it and watched him make his way out of the room to go and wash the thermometer.

"You really know how to make yourself feel at home," she noted when he came back. "Did you know that?" He was walking around the house like he lived there, it didn't bother her per se but it was weird how comfortable he was.

"Yeah." He picked up the garbage bin that was under her desk and put it near her bed. "Put the used tissue here," he told her. She somehow managed to make a fortress around her with used tissues, which was a good sign: her body was fighting off the illness it was supposed to.

"I'll go get you more tissue," he mumbled noting that she was running out of it.

Why wouldn't he make himself feel at home? The girls were great. They like him, and his cat he might add.

The only inconvenience was the fact that he'd catch glimpses of them with not a lot of clothes because they'd leave doors open while changing but after it happened twice in a row he learned his lesson. His gaze was always fixated on the floor ahead of him.

Other than that, he could _live_ with the Bellas. Not that he would, but he knew he _could_.

"What?" Beca frowned feeling Jesse's gaze on her after he handed her the tissue box.

"Promise you'd wake me up if you need anything," he said. "I know you, Beca. You'll die before you ask for help. And, a world without Beca Mitchell wouldn't be the same. I need you to remind me how much of an idiot I am." He playfully ruffled her hair.

"Way to make this about yourself, Jesse," she noted, pushing her hair out of her face.

"Just please wake me up if you need anything, Becs."

Those damned puppy dog eyes were staring into her soul, it was hard to refuse him anything when he looked at her like that—she really needed to work on that.

"I will," she finally said.

"Good." He reached and turned the lights off, leaving the lamp on her desk as the only source of light in the room before he went and got settled on Fat Amy's bed.

* * *

"Jesse, are you still up?" she asked maybe 15 minutes later, she was starting to fall asleep but she had something bugging her and that she needed answers to.

"Uh-Huh," Jesse answered, tilting his head to look at her.

"Last Friday when I called you," she began to say. "We talked for like thirty minutes."

"Yeah," he said when she went quiet.

"What did we talk about?" She had been wondering for a while so she figured she should just ask. If it were something embarrassing, he would have mentioned it by now because Jesse lived for that.

"You don't remember?" He wasn't surprised, she sounded very drunk.

"Nope." She wished she did.

"You wanted to talk about Friday thirteenth for some reason. You have some strong opinions about that franchise." It was weird how opinionated she was about Friday 13th of all movie franchises. "So, we discussed those opinions of yours for most of the phone call." He paused. "You told me about what happened with Pete." He heard her audibly sigh. "What he did was a dick move, by the way."

"Who can blame him?" she replied. "Anyone in a similar situation would react like he did."

"I wouldn't." Jesse shrugged. "It's just puke."

"Yeah, I guess I wouldn't let some puke get in the way of getting laid either," she figured.

"It's not about that," he chuckled. "You never told me about Pete before. I thought you agreed to tell me once you started dating."

"I never agreed to such thing," she reminded him. "And, even if I did there's nothing to tell you anyway. I'm not dating him or anyone for that matter."

"Weird. You sounded like you liked him over the phone."

"Eh, I was probably bummed out because I didn't get laid," she replied, she couldn't possibly be into Pete.

He was nice and all, she was not interested in him: the fact that she shoved her tongue down his throat didn't change that.

"Well, I think you should go for it."

"Go for what?" she questioned in confusion.

"I think you should ask Pete out," he told her and frowned at the chuckle that turned into a cough.

"Yeah, I'm not gonna do that," she said, clearing her throat.

"Because you threw up on him?" he guessed. "Consider it a faux pas. Now I've never met the guy myself but I'm sure he just panicked and isn't really a dick. And, I know how you get when you're drunk which is why _I know_ that you weren't bummed out because you didn't get laid."

"How do I exactly get when I'm drunk?" she asked ignoring the rest of his words.

"Your walls become paper thin," he told her and that somehow freaked her out more than anything in the world.

"I am officially never getting drunk again," she decided.

"Oh, C'mon, Beca!" he called in frustration, taking her by surprise. "I get why you're like this. I totally get it. Your parents fucked you up. However, the whole _'I'm cool with it and won't do anything about it'_ is bullshit. How can you know that you're better off like this when you've never tried to put yourself out there?"

"That's actually a good point," she admitted after giving it some thought.

"Just consider it," he sighed. "And, if he or anyone else hurt you I will make sure they don't get off easy."

She wanted to ask him why he cared so much about her love life but deep down knew that it wasn't about who she dated it was about her messed up self as a whole.

Also, a frustrated Jesse was a slightly more attractive Jesse, she realized.

She was feverish but the heat she was feeling had nothing to do with her fever.

"Easy there, buddy. You can't even hurt a fly," she said when he kept gazing at her, expecting a reply.

"Flies wouldn't break your heart," he responded. "Boys might."

She nodded, figuring that ending the conversation was her best option because she was seriously getting turned on.

"Good night, Jesse," she finally said.

"Night," he mumbled back.

* * *

He didn't get much sleep because Beca woke him up unintentionally. She was talking her sleep. He guessed it was a fever dream because she was occasionally whimpering.

He laid in bed for some time, just listening to her, and frowned hearing her say, "No, I won't sit on Elmo's lap."

' _What kind of dream is she having?'_ he wondered as he went to check her temperature.

He didn't need a thermometer to tell him that she had a bad fever, she was sweating.

He figured a wet cloth would work and that there was no need to wake her up.

Jesse took a seat on the edge of her bed and periodically dipped the cloth in cold water and placed it back on her forehead.

Most of the stuff that came out of her mouth while she dreamt made no sense and the words that did confuse him because he had no context or what so ever.

At one point, the whimpering turned into moans, which he knew could only mean that she was in pain. Therefore, he wasn't surprised when she woke up. Neither was he surprised when she leaned forward and puked all over the floor.

He picked up the bin and held it towards her. She took it from him and continued to throw up into it.

"Wanna go wash your face?" he asked when she looked up.

"And pee," she told him.

He took the bin from her and put aside before he stood up and helped her out of the bed.

"Where can I find a mop?" he asked as he walked her to the bathroom.

She was holding onto him for dear life, it broke his heart to see her so sick.

"Check under the stairs," she told him.

He left her in the bathroom and raced downstairs to retrieve the mop and clean the floor.

* * *

He was in the process of moping the floor when Beca walked back into the room.

"Sorry you had to clean that," she apologized.

"Don't worry about it." He put the mop in the bucket, having finished. "You need to change out of your clothes." She was sweating a lot and the wet fabric against her skin would only make her sicker.

He walked over to her closet while she took a seat on the bed.

"Arms up," he said, tossing the sweatshirt he brought on the bed.

Any other day, Beca would tell him she could change by herself but she was exhausted and had no other choice than to let him help her out.

"Wait. No," she mumbled when he reached to help her with the t-shirt she was wearing underneath her sweatshirt. "Turn around. I'm not wearing a bra."

He had every inch of her body memorized but she had a point.

"I won't look," he told her, meeting her gaze briefly before he shifted his gaze elsewhere.

She didn't fight him and he knew it was for no other reason than not having the energy to fight him.

"I got it," she told him when he grabbed the clean sweatshirt and took it from him. "Turn around."

He obliged and sighed hearing her struggle to put it on.

He tilted his head hearing her get under the covers and frowned noticing that she was shivering.

"What are you doing?" Beca asked when he took the duvet on Amy's bed and put it on her bed instead.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" he asked back. "You need this more than I do." He stepped back once he was done tucking her to bed. "Besides, I don't plan to go back to sleep." Jesse smiled a little when she sneaked her hand out and weakly held his when he sat down on the edge of her bed.

"Hey, Becs," he called and heard a hum in response. "What were you dreaming about earlier?"

"I was at the mall and Nana was trying to get to take a picture with Elmo."

"Elmo?" he echoed. He what he heard made sense but the whole thing didn't make much sense.

"Elmo kept showing up everywhere," she told him her voice above a whisper. "He replaced Santa, too."

He nodded when it finally made sense: it was Christmas. Her fever dream was set during Christmas.

"That sounds haunting," he noted and smiled a little when she chuckled. "I'd love to hear more about this but you should get some sleep."

"Love you, nerd," she mumbled, sighing as she began to fall asleep.

It was weird to hear her tell him she loved him. He knew she cared about him but it was nice to know that she loved him. Because so did he.

Her friendship mattered so much for him and he was glad to know that she felt the same.

"I love you, too, weirdo," he said back, squeezing her hand that was still holding his.


	18. Chapter 18

"That's a really long line," Benji noted. "We should just come back tomorrow," he added after glancing at the time.

"No, we're here now," Beca said in response. "You're taking a picture with Santa."

Benji never celebrated Christmas. Having grown up in a very Jewish community with not that many friends who weren't Jewish, he never got to do _Christmasy stuff_ as a child. Stuff like having your picture taken with Santa Claus at the mall. Lucky for him, he had a friend like Beca who would drag him to the mall so he would pose with Santa. And, a friend like Fat Amy who could do the physical dragging if needed.

"He has a point, Beca. It's like they're in line to get their butts signed by the wiggles."

"Why the wiggles?" Beca questioned in confusion.

"I have an idea," Fat Amy said before she left Benji and Beca. "Don't move."

"Please don't break the law," Beca called after her in a considerably low voice.

When she came back, Fat Amy had a Santa Claus costume on, beard and all.

" _You better watch out. You better not cry. You better not pout, I'm telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to town_ ," she sang as she made her way to them, gaining more attention than what her outfit already brought.

"How much did this costume cost you?" Beca suspiciously asked.

She knew her friend: she wouldn't put money into such thing solely for Benji's sake.

"Doesn't matter, Beca. What matters is getting an awkward smile on Benji's face." She threw her arm around Beca's shoulder who narrowed her eyes.

"You stole it, didn't you?" she asked, shrugging Fat Amy's arm off.

"No!" Fat Amy denied. "Now, let's take this picture." She sat down and pulled Benji on her lap, almost cradling him like a baby.

Beca pulled her Polaroid camera from her backpack and took a photo of Benji smiling awkwardly at the camera while Fat Amy grinned.

Beca smiled a little eyeing the photo. It was cute. "Go return the outfit from where you stole it," she deadpanned, glaring disapprovingly at Fat Amy.

"I borrowed it," Fat Amy corrected, standing up. "And, stop looking at me like that." She poked Beca in the shoulder. "You've done some shoplifting yourself."

"A pack of gum and a freaking Santa Claus costume belong to different leagues, Amy. Besides, I only did it _once_ because you dared me…"

Fat Amy gave her a look that said 'really?'

"Whatever. We're not getting into this. Go return it before they find out. I will go point them your way if you don't."

"You wouldn't dare snitch on me. Snitches get stitches," Fat Amy said, mockingly threatening her best friend.

"Oh yeah?" Beca tried to keep her expression blank and hide any amusement from her voice.

"Oh, yeah," Fat Amy nodded before a wide grin broke, unable to go on any longer with the act.

"I can't return this anymore," she said, causing Beca to frown.

"See, I bent to tie my shoelaces and it kind of tore." She grimaced before she turned around to show Beca the tear that was right on her butt crack. "But don't worry I paid for it with your credit card. It's not stolen." She whipped Beca's credit card from her pocket and slipped into the pocket of Beca's coat.

"This better not be expensive. And, why you have my credit card?" she grumbled. "How did you get it in the first place?"

"Look at that smile. You can't put a price on that," Fat Amy spoke, taking the photo from Beca's hand, ignoring all of what Beca said.

"Hey you," she said next to the first strange she laid eyes on. "Mind taking a picture for us?" She snatched Beca's camera from her hand and handing it to the stranger before he could say anything.

She then pulled both Benji and Beca to her sides and grinned for the camera.

"Thank you, stranger." Fat Amy took the camera and photo as well, sighing as she eyed it.

Beca looked exactly like she did in her photo with mall Santa from when she was ten; annoyed.

Benji sported the same awkward smile, showing more teeth this time.

Fat Amy looked thrilled in her Santa costume.

"Come on, we should head home," Beca murmured, shoving her camera into her backpack.

Things weren't as awkward as she expected them to be at home—she might have set the bar really low—her family was genuinely having a good time.

Having Benji and Fat Amy around helped a ton. There was never a room for awkward silence. Fat Amy was quite talkative and Benji's anxiety made him one hell of a ranting machine.

* * *

They got home a little after four pm. Fat Amy went straight the kitchen to snack while Benji stayed outside to help Dr. Mitchell shovel the snow from the lawn.

Beca figured she'd take a nap. Climbing the stairs, she unzipped her coat as loosened her scarf. She was beyond tired and truly believed she deserved the nap. She was in the corridor when she overheard her mother on the phone. She wasn't going to eavesdrop but when she heard her own name pop in the conversation her curiosity got the best of her.

The door was ajar, she watched her mother walk around the room while on the phone. "No, it's not that. I'm going to tell her. I can't _not_ tell her," she was saying as she rubbed her temple. "Sooner or later, Beca has to know."

Beca figured making her presence known and asking her mother about whatever it was she had to know.

With her hand on the knob, Beca knocked on the door before she pushed it open.

"I'll talk to you later," Eliza sighed, her head tilted in the direction of the door. "Yup!" she said in response to whatever the other person on the line said before she hung up the phone. "Hey, Bec," the mother greeted her daughter, a small smile on her lips. "Did you want something?" Eliza mumbled, running her fingers through her hair while she tossed her phone on the bed.

"I thought I heard my name," she said instead of cutting right to the chase. "Did you call me?"

"No," Eliza replied.

Beca nodded, taking in her mother's reaction: a perfect poker face—yep, she got it from her mama.

"Your grandmother said you went to the mall, how was it?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Crowded," Beca curtly answered. "I'm gonna go take a nap. I'll see around," she added, stepping out of the room.

Her mother clearly didn't want to tell her whatever it was _she had to know_ and she was too tired to look into it.

* * *

After a power nap, Beca laid in bed for some time. She thought about the one-sided conversation she had overheard. She had no clue what it could be. She ruled out an engagement since her mother wasn't dating anyone. The only other possibility she could think of sucked.

Even since she got here, Eliza seemed a little too tired: she claimed it was jetlag: given what she overhead, Beca was afraid it wasn't the case.

She hoped her mother wasn't sick because despite their rocky relationship she cared about her wellbeing.

When her phone chimed with a text, she grabbed it and smiled a little seeing that it was Jesse—she really should stop doing that.

The attachment made her smile even harder; a mirror selfie where Jesse wore a custom-made sweater with his cat's face printed on it.

 _'Congratulations, you're officially a cat lady,'_ she texted him.

 _'I'm honored,'_ his reply came fast. _'Tell me what color do you want yours? I was gonna order one for you when I ordered mine but I figured I should check if they're good first. And they are. So, yeah, what will it be?'_

 _'I like your cat alright but not to the point where I'd wear a sweater with him on it.'_

 _'You love OUR cat. You found him, Beca. I have custody of our boy but he's OUR boy.'_ She rolled her eyes reading his text. _'I'm thinking grey for the sweater?'_

 _'Yeah, grey will do.'_

Who was she kidding saying no? He was going to get her the sweater might as well have a say in the color.

 _'I gave Amber your cell phone number so that you could discuss when you're picking her and Teresa up and all. Don't agree to split gas money. It's on me. All of it.'_

The smile she was had dropped reading the text. She tried to ignore how the mention of Amber made her feel but it was hard.

 _'Dude. I'm driving back to Barden with or without them. You don't have to pay for anything neither does she.'_

 _'You're picking them up from Ohio and you have an irrational hatred towards Ohio. The least I can do is pay for gas.'_

When Jesse asked if she could pick Amber and her daughter Teresa from Ohio, she didn't think too hard about it before she agreed. Jesse was her friend and she'd do anything, _within reason of course_ , for him.

She, however, got confused at first because if her memory served her right Amber lived in Idaho. Jesse went on to tell her that Amber was spending Christmas at her sister's in Ohio.

He also explained to her that the mother and daughter were tight on money and a long bus ride from Idaho to Ohio was enough to endure.

Things were moving too fast in Beca's opinion, it didn't feel like too long ago when Jesse told her that the slides she helped make worked and that Amber was moving to Barden.

She didn't expect Amber and her daughter to move within a few weeks.

 _'It's not irrational. I can go on for hours to explain how rational it is but let's not get into that now.'_

 _'Fine, weirdo. I'll talk to you later, Iris is calling me.'_ He was spending Christmas with his brother's family.

 _'Crying doesn't equal calling, dork.'_ Sending out the text, she tossed her phone aside and stretched. She looked at the door hearing a knock. "Come on in."

Dr. Mitchell stepped into the room. "Oh good, you're up."

"I came to wake you up so you could eat later," he explained as she pushed herself into a sitting a position. "Are you coming down?" he asked next.

"Yeah, I'm coming."

"Very well then." He nodded curtly, letting himself out of the room.

She got up, stretching yet again before she stood in front of the mirror to check how she looked: the lack of makeup before she went to bed served her well: she looked okay, her hair was a bit of a mess and calming it down didn't require much effort.

* * *

"You're still under twenty-one," Dr. Mitchell said, taking the glass wine from Beca's hand causing her to roll her eyes before she tilted her head to look at her grandmother silently asking for help.

Ella shook her head meeting her granddaughter's gaze. "Oh, for love of God, James," she sighed. "She's twenty."

"But—"

"—No, buts," she firmly said. "I let you have a beer with dinner when you were younger than Beca," she reminded him. "Leave her alone."

Dr. Mitchell tilted his head to look at Eliza expecting her to have something to say.

"Different drinking age back home," she said with a shrug.

Beca found it funny that her parents were acting like parents when they barely did any parenting her entire life. She, however, figured it would be best if she didn't make a snarky comment despite how tempting it was to mess with her parents.

"What's the matter, Eliza? You don't like dinner?" Ella questioned worryingly.

"No, dinner is great. I'm just not hungry," Eliza explained.

Beca glanced at her mother's plate and only then noticed that she had barely eaten anything.

Exhaustion and lack of appetite: Beca made a mental note to look up illnesses where these two were symptoms.

Later in the evening, they played Charades, which surprisingly turned out to be fun—Beca knew she had to do something about her cynicism because everything seemed to turn out 10 times better than she'd anticipate when it involved her family lately.

The step-monster of all people kicked ass at Charades while Dr. Mitchell did the worse.

The game was Benji's idea, saying it was his family's favorite game to play.

And making the loser wash the dishes was Beca's idea, which was why Dr. Mitchell was on dishwashing duty while the rest lounged in the living room.

"Who taught you how to do magic, Benji?" Ella asked the boy who was showing her the card tricks he knew once she, Benji, Sheila and Fat Amy finished playing a game of poker.

"I taught myself," he answered.

"That's impressive," she noted.

"Thanks," he beamed.

"Yeah, weird how you still lost at poker," Fat Amy said in puzzlement. "If I had your skills I would have definitely cheated to win," she was saying as she flipped a coin.

"You're not really a winner if you cheat," Benji opinionated and smiled when Ella patted his cheek before she got up to sit on the couch instead of the chair by the table.

"I think James needs some help with the dishes," Ella snorted, hearing crashing noise coming from the kitchen.

"I'll go give him a hand," Sheila figured, getting up.

"Qoph… that can't be a real word," Eliza mumbled looking up to meet Beca's gaze.

"I thought so, too," Beca told her, scribbling down the points the word granted her. "It's a Hebrew letter and it's in the dictionary, feel free to check."

"I stand corrected," Eliza said in response, not bothering to check, and placed her tiles.

"Since when do you know Hebrew letters?" Ella asked, overhearing Beca.

"I just know this one," Beca told her.

"Jesus, you're really good at this," Eliza said when Beca spelled a quite difficult word when it was her turn.

"Thanks," Beca smiled in response, humbly agreeing.

"Beca, the fact that you excel at Scrabble hurts your street cred," Fat Amy noted and Beca very subtly flipped her off. She was still pissed off over the Santa outfit purchase.

"It's not just Scrabble, Amy." Ella nodded at the bookcase.

"Is that a spelling bee trophy?" Fat Amy faked a gasp.

"Well, this makes sense then," Eliza said, throwing her arm over the couch and leaning against it. "I'm not terrible at this game you just happen to be a spelling champion."

Fat Amy pushed her chair back to get up and made her way to the bookcase to get a better look and saw a framed photo from a play where she could see Beca right in the middle of the stage. "You did theatre?"

"Uh-huh." She might have forgotten to mention her theatre background to any of her friends.

"I feel like I don't know you and we've been friends since we were four. You could be freaking Batman for all I know."

Beca rolled her eyes because Fat Amy was being dramatic. "It just never came up." She shrugged.

"I did theatre, too," Benji chimed in getting up to look at the bookcase as well.

"I would have been surprised if you didn't, Benji," Fat Amy said. "What other things are you hiding, Beca? Are you _Batman_?"

"I'm not hiding anything... Mom, are you falling asleep?" she frowned in confusion once she looked at her mother and found her clearly dozing off.

It was barely 10 pm.

"No, just resting my eyes." She sat up and rotated her neck. "Whose turn is it?" she asked.

"Your turn," Beca answered. "But we can stop if you want to." She looked tired and could use some sleep.

"No, no, this is fun." Eliza smiled meeting Beca's gaze before she reached to fetch herself some letters.

"You were in an Into the Woods production?" Benji mumbled eyeing one of the framed pictures.

"High school production," Beca replied.

"My high school did a production of into the woods, too. I got to play the baker," he recounted in excitement.

"I played a ratty version Cinderella," Beca informed.

"You sure have the voice for the part," Benji noted.

"Eh, I wanted to play the witch to be honest, but you get what you get." She shrugged.

"Into the Woods: that's a Broadway musical right?" Eliza asked.

"Yep," Benji and Beca answered in unison.

"I'd say it's Stephen Sondheim's finest work but then again everything he makes is _so_ good," Benji went on to say.

"True that," Beca agreed.

"I can't believe you two are currently nerding out over Broadway," Fat Amy mumbled.

"You like Broadway, too, Amy," Beca deadpanned. "You can't tell me you wouldn't jump at the chance to become a _Broadway Baby_?"

Benji chuckled at the Follies reference Beca made, a reference _only_ he got.

"I would love to rock any stage," Fat Amy said answering Beca's question.

"Would you?" Eliza asked her daughter who snorted in response.

"Nope, I wanna produce music." Pulling the last tiles from the bag, she frowned focusing as she thought of a word she could spell with what she had.

"Why not do both?" Ella wondered.

"Both are time-consuming. And while I enjoyed doing theatre, becoming a producer has always been what I wanted to be," Beca answered as she placed her tiles down.

"Well, we definitely should do this more often," Eliza said, taking a look at the score once Beca updated it. "I had fun getting my ass handed to me in Scrabble of all games," she continued.

"You're a worthy opponent," Beca deadpanned to which her mother rolled her eyes.

* * *

It was very early in the morning when Beca woke up and it wasn't because she was too excited to see what she got for Christmas. She got up to use the bathroom and was surprised to see that someone else was up and occupying the bathroom closest to her bedroom. She figured she'd go to the one on the first floor but stopped in her tracks when she realized that the person in the bathroom was currently puking.

She decided to go and check if they were okay. "You okay in there?" she asked.

"M-hmm. I'm okay," her mother answered before she flushed the toilet.

Beca let herself into the bathroom and watched her mother pull herself up and wash up.

"You wouldn't be throwing up if you were okay," she noted.

"Beca, I'm fine. Go back to bed." She sniffled, patting her face with a towel. "What are you even doing up this early?"

"No, you're not doing that again," Beca closed the bathroom door.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not changing the topic. Something is up with you and I wanna know what it is. If you're sick tell me. I can take it."

She swallowed hard: she really didn't want to hear that she was dying.

Eliza placed the towel back in its holder before she looked back at her daughter. "Let's not do this here."

"Jesus, mom! Just fucking tell me." Yes, she was freaking out. She really shouldn't have looked up her mother's symptoms on the internet. There were too many possibilities and they went from eating disorders and depression to lung and throat cancer.

"Keep your voice down. There's no need to wake everyone at four in the morning."

"Fine," Beca grumbled and unlocked the door.

"I was waiting for an appropriate time to tell you but there was never a good timing." Eliza closed the door to Beca's bedroom behind her.

Beca crossed her arms across her chest and willed herself to keep her emotions in check if the news were as terrible as she envisioned them.

"I'm pregnant," Eliza broke the news and arched an eyebrow at the blank look on Beca's face.

Blinking, at last, Beca buried her face in her hands, taking in the news.

Pregnancy never crossed her mind but it made sense, the lack of appetite and exhaustion made sense.

She was ready for the worse—at it again with her cynicism.

Inhaling deeply, she looked up. Nope, she needed more time to process.

"Aren't you a little old for babies?" she finally said.

"Beca, I'm barely forty, I'm not that old for babies. A lot of women are having babies in their forties," she blew a breath.

"It wasn't planned, was it?" Beca guessed.

"Nope," Eliza replied quickly.

"Of course, not," Beca murmured. "Who has kids on purpose?" she snorted.

"Hey, c'mon on—"

"—no, Mom. You screwed up once. Why are you deliberately fucking up another person's life again?" She paused, realizing that she was raising her voice and that she shouldn't do that because a, her grandmother raised her better than that, and b, everyone was asleep. "Just do everyone a favor and get an abortion." _Harsh_ , Beca realized as soon as the words left her mouth but she was too pissed off to care.

"How can you say that about your sibling?" Eliza wondered, clearly hurt by what Beca said.

"Oh, trust me, mom, they're better off not coming to the world." She chuckled humorlessly. "I was lucky enough to have Nana. Who knows whom they will end up with once you grow tired of them in a few years?"

"Enough!" Eliza exclaimed and took Beca by surprise— _so much for not waking everyone up._ "I'm your mother you can't talk to me like this."

 _'_ _Watch me,'_ was on the tip of her mouth but she kept her mouth shut seeing that just made her mother cry.

The crying turned into weeping in mere seconds and Beca would guess that it was the shift in hormones heightening her feelings.

The anger she was feeling not too long ago was replaced by regret at the sight of her mother crying over the harsh things she said to her.

Grabbing the tissue box that was on her desk, she nudged her mother with it. "I'm sorry," she apologized. "You're right I shouldn't talk to you like that."

Eliza sniffled after blowing her nose into a tissue and sat down the bed. "The baby was unplanned but their father and I are together, Beca."

"Yeah, who is the father?" Beca asked, leaning against her desk across from her mother.

"Adrian."

"I didn't know you were back together." Last time she checked, her mother had broken up with Adrian over two years ago.

"We got back together a little over three months ago."

"And how far along are you?"

"Give or take three months."

Beca cleared her throat, biting back the comment she had because she really didn't want to make her mother cry again: she knew how likely it was if she didn't watch what came out of her mouth.

"I regret sending you to live with your father. I know you hate me for it and if I could I'd—" she started to cry mid-sentence and didn't finish it.

"I don't hate you, mom." Beca rolled her eyes. Yes, she resented her for most of her life. However, hatred was never something she felt towards her.

"I wish I could take it all back," Eliza managed to say.

"This is getting too sappy," Beca sighed.

"What?" Eliza looked at her in confusion.

"I don't do sappy." Beca shrugged. "I said some mean things for which I apologize," she apologized again. "But let's not get into things we can't do jack about." It was pointless and brought back loads of negative feelings and unpleasant memories. "Please don't screw the baby's life."

"I won't," Eliza answered.

Beca had a habit of assuming the worse when it came to her family and was aware of the fact that she needed to change that attitude: she starting with what she thought of her mother's parenting chops.

"You never told me why you got up this early?" Eliza asked.

"I had to— _have to_ use the bathroom." She straightened up. "I really need to pee," she said before she left the room.

When she came back, her room was empty. She saw the lights downstairs on so she figured her mother went downstairs.

"Want some hot chocolate?" Eliza asked glancing up to see Beca in the kitchen's doorway.

"Yeah, sure," Beca said, stepping into the room.

"Do you happen to know where your granny keeps marshmallows?" she was asking as she tipped toed to get mugs from the cupboard.

Beca went and got the bag of marshmallows from one of the drawers.

She watched her mother pour the hot chocolate into the mugs and as she reached for the marshmallow bag she said, "I know I said I don't do sappy and this is gonna sound pretty sappy—thanks." She accepted the mug of hot chocolate her mother handed her. "—Every Christmas I used to wish we'd all spend the next Christmas together here until I was like twelve. I convinced myself that it was pretty stupid of a wish in the first place and stopped wishing for it to happen."

"It's not stupid," Eliza quipped.

"Yeah, I know," she agreed. "I'm glad it came true, though," she mumbled, bringing her mug to her lips to avoid eye contact.

"That wasn't _that_ sappy," Eliza snorted, amused by Beca's awkwardness. "It's rather sweet actually. I'm really glad it came true, too."

She wanted to go for a hug but didn't know if she should so she settled for rubbing Beca's back. "Wanna make this a thing?" she asked.

Beca looked up at the question. "You'd fly over for Christmas every year to spend it with us here?"

"Yeah. I mean if your grandmother would have me… and your sibling—" she paused. "And Adrian if things work out with him," she murmured.

"She would," Beca quickly replied.

"Great. We should tell your Dad and see if he's down."

Beca nodded in agreement. "I hope things work out with Adrian," she said, knowing her mother's track record… boyfriend never seemed to stay.

"I hope so, too," Eliza said, sounding hopeful.

Beca felt bad for her mother, she never thought a day would come where she'd feel anything but resentment towards her mother. She felt bad for her because she, too, had a shitty childhood: a single mother who got remarried and treated her daughter like shit, punishing her for her father leaving despite it not being her fault, and an absent father with whom she had only recently patched up with. Her childhood fucked her up and it reflected on her life choices.

It scared Beca to think that she'd end up like her. She hated to think that she'd also struggle to maintain relationships just like her mother. It was part of why she _never_ let anyone in.

It was very lonely and stupid but also very drastic and efficient.

And, then a certain somebody weaseled his way into her heart and fuck everything up for her. It was pretty dumb of her to think that ignorance would work.

"Where did you wander off to?" Eliza puzzled in curiosity, watching her daughter space out.

"Nowhere," Beca mumbled snapping out of it.

Eliza nodded slowly not believing her but doing her the favor of letting it go.

* * *

 **AN:** Thank you for taking some time to read this. Please let me know what you think. Also, tell me where you think I'm taking this. I'd love to hear your guesses. Good day, people!


	19. Chapter 19

Fat Amy, who was behind the wheel, was jamming the music playing through the speakers of the car as she carefully navigated the road, while Benji gazed out of the window and at the view. The view was sure _something_. It had been snowing since they left the house would continue to snow heavily.

Beca was aware of the fact that she hadn't uttered a word since they got on the road. She was glad neither Benji nor Fat Amy commented on it. It wasn't after all out of character. She had always enjoyed quietness. And, she had motion sickness which made her grumpiness on car rides excusable.

Beca was quiet for a reason. She knew that in her current mood she was easily irritable and would snarl uncalled for insults over the smallest things. She didn't want that to happen—she didn't want them to suspect anything.

She couldn't explain to them that the favor she was doing Jesse was behind her shit of a mood. Well, it wasn't the favor itself. It was the outcome of the favor. Bringing Amber to Barden closer to Jesse who she knew planned to pursue something serious with the woman.

She thought about that and other things that came with that: all the kissing, and touching, and— _ugh, stop going there,'_ Beca scolded herself.

She'll admit she was jealous, jealous of a woman she never met. She was meeting her soon, very soon. Beca wasn't eager per se but she was curious to see what Jesse saw in Amber.

He did talk an awful lot about her despite having spent so little time with her in person—Technology helped a bunch—they kept in touch.

As soon as Fat Amy stopped the car reaching their destination, Beca sent out a text to Amber letting her know they had arrived.

It wasn't long until a woman came out of the door. She walked carefully to the car while Beca lowered the window and plastered a smile on her face.

"Hi," the woman, Amber Beca soon realized, greeted, smiling politely, and looked behind Beca briefly to wave her hand at Benji and Fat Amy. "Hello," she said to them.

"I hope you didn't have trouble getting here," she said, meeting Beca's gaze.

"No trouble at all," she replied, unlocking the door to get out.

"It's nice to _finally_ meet you," Beca said, managing not to sound sarcastic, as she extended a hand to shake Amber's.

"I feel the same about you. Jesse's told me so much about." She wrapped her arms around herself shortly after they shook hands. Only then Beca realized that she wasn't wearing a coat, she just had a _cute_ Christmas sweater on and a pair of jeans. And, she looked really good, _effortlessly_ really good.

Beca wondered what could Jesse had told Amber about herself and figured she'd ask him later. She'd heard plenty about Amber but it was only because Jesse was a very close friend of hers and felt comfortable enough to tell her too much _if you ask her_.

He picked the habit of telling her too much after they got into a friends with benefits relationship. It was one of their "ground rules". She too told him too much _too_ but unlike him, she stopped once they called it quits.

"Well, come on inside." It was quite early still in the morning but they had to head out early to avoid having to drive at night for too long—it was a good ten-hour drive on a good day from Ohio to Georgia, given the current challenging weather plus stops it was going to take longer.

Fat Amy had been behind the wheel for two hours and needed a break—Benji drove the first two hours from Michigan. "We can't stop for too long," Beca told her, neither accepting nor declining.

"I know," Amber agreed.

They estimated the road trip from Michigan to Georgia to take them around 16 hours. Each one of them had four hours to drive, two at a time. "Come on. You, guys, rest while I load our luggage," she gave Beca a small yet somehow bright smile as she tucked the hair that fell on her eyes behind her ear.

Beca had a hard time not openly staring at Amber. It's just that she was very pretty. She had dark brown hair that fell on her shoulders as well as brown eyes. She had the fullest and longest eyelashes Beca had ever seen on another human being.

Amber was taller than she was—everyone was—Five-five, probably. And, with her tanned skin complexion, she looked like she vacationing somewhere in Central America not visiting her sister in a snowing Midwestern state.

"Mommy, are we leaving now?" A young girl, Theresa Beca guessed, called peeking her head through the doorway.

Amber tilted her head. "Yeah. Go back inside, Tree." Beca's eyes fell briefly on Amber's defined jawline before she averted them to avoid getting caught staring. Even from a distance, Beca could tell the child looked a lot like her mother.

"Okay," Theresa replied before she glanced at Beca. "Hi," she greeted shyly.

Beca found herself waving a hand at the small girl at the door who disappeared inside the house seconds later.

* * *

Beca was drumming her fingers on the wheel to the beat of the song currently playing: the music was helping her keep her mind occupied so that it wouldn't wander.

She glanced at the passengers in the backseat: an animated conversation was taking place between Theresa and Benji—Benji was good with kids and Theresa warmed up to him quite fast.

She couldn't quite see Amber but she could hear her occasionally replying whenever Theresa asked her something. Otherwise, Amber kept to herself.

Beca almost missed the exit leading to the gas station because of all the snow. They picked a bad day for a road trip but there was no turning back, not when they were more than halfway through already.

It was really cold when she stepped out of the vehicle, Beca pulled at the sleeves of her sweatshirt as she walked around the car only tilting her head when she heard someone climb out of the car.

"Beca, wait."

"No, I got it," Beca declined, seeing that it was Amber and that she had a credit card in her hand.

She could feel Amber's eyes on her as she slid her credit card and followed the instruction.

"I don't know how much Jesse told you but you don't need to do this," Amber uneasily said as Beca removed the gas cap. "I can afford to split gas money," she added when Beca glanced up. "You don't know me and you agreed to give me and Tree a ride to Barden, it's the least I can do."

"Yeah, I'm not taking your money and it's not because I don't think you can afford it," Beca said as she selected the grade of gas. "I'm driving back to Barden with or without you. Seems unnecessary to make you pay for gas money." She shrugged. "Besides, you're hardly a stranger," she mumbled, pulling the trigger on the pump, and looked up. "You're _a friend_ of a friend."

She had been doing great keeping her shit together, mainly by avoiding talking to Amber altogether, but she knew she had just fucked up. The tone of her voice gave her feelings away and the frown that formed on Amber's face confirmed it.

In an attempt to do damage control she added, "Jesse is a really good friend of mine and he _really_ cares about you. What kind of friend would I be if I… take money from you?" _Horrible. Horrible attempt._

"You think I'm moving to Barden for Jesse?" Amber asked in confusion.

Amber's confusion while reassuring of the fact that she was oblivious to her jealousy confused Beca.

"I'm not moving for him," Amber went on to say. "I mean I wouldn't be moving to Barden if I didn't know Jesse because I have never heard of it before meeting him but I'm not moving for him."

"Why are you moving to Barden then?" Beca wondered curiously.

Amber took a few seconds before she answered, "A fresh start," she replied. "That presentation you helped make sold me on Barden. I needed to get away from—" she cut herself off. "—I needed a fresh start."

Beca nodded slowly, hating that she knew _too much_ about Amber. It felt like an invasion of privacy. Amber clearly didn't want her to know. She was fine pretending she didn't know.

"Jesse is a sweet guy," Amber was saying as Beca recapped the gas tank cap having finished filling the tank. "I like him. But not to the point where I move across the country for his sake."

"Does he know that?" Beca quietly asked.

"Oh yeah, of course, he does," Amber affirmed. "Would be really fucked up if I didn't clear that up."

"Yeah," Beca chuckled humorlessly.

Jesse never explicitly said Amber was moving to Barden to be with him, Beca sort of drew that conclusion by herself. Deep down she knew she did that to force herself into believing he was unavailable and that she needed to forget all about him.

Hearing from Amber that he was indeed available made things harder. Why did she have to be so messed up? Why couldn't she just tell him how she felt?

It scared her but she wanted to do it. She was very reluctant about it, however.

It was like her feelings and her issues were fighting for control: it was quite the mess: she was quite the mess.

She didn't want to be controlled by either of those things: She wanted to make reasonable decisions.

Beca knew how unlikely it was for her to make reasonable calls when it came to heart matters but since she was learning to be less cynical, she was hopeful.

* * *

It wasn't snowing when they reached Barden, but it was dark. The streets were empty. It felt like a scene out of a crappy horror movie.

The GPS told her that she was getting close to the motel where Amber and Theresa were staying. Even in the dimness, Beca recognized the area.

Pulling over, she unfastened her seatbelt then reached to shake Amber who just like everyone else in the car had fallen asleep.

"Hey, we're here," she whispered, not wanting to wake the others yet—she figured they could get some more sleep until she drove them home.

Amber sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "Already," she said in confusion. "Shit, why didn't you wake me up?" she asked, realizing that Beca let her sleep instead of waking her up to get behind the wheel.

"You seemed tired." Beca shrugged, grabbing her phone to text Jesse and let him know they made it.—she knew he was inside waiting.

She glanced at Amber when she climbed out of the car to get her things from the trunk.

Amber packed light, which at first Beca found bizarre but it later made sense. She wanted a fresh start: she didn't bring anything that reminded her of the past.

She was standing by the trunk when Jesse stepped out of the motel. He paced towards her and pulled her in a tight yet brief hug as soon as he reached her.

Beca saw their interaction and tried not to eavesdrop on the brief conversation they had, deciding to stay in the car. She looked up when Jesse knocked on the window's door and lowered it.

"Hi," he greeted then glanced behind her and at the passengers—Amber was getting her daughter out of the backseat as quietly as she could.

He frowned looking back at her. "You look exhausted," he noted, lowering his voice when he saw that the others were asleep. "I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess you drove the most out of everyone," he mumbled next, giving her a pointed look.

"They fell asleep, I couldn't bring myself to wake anyone up," she said in response.

"Try to stretch before you go to bed," he advised. "Your back is going to hurt even more tomorrow."

"It's not that bad," she deadpanned.

"I'll check in with you tomorrow and I can't promise that I wouldn't rub the fact that I'm right in your face," he smugly said, earning an eye roll. "I guess I'll also give you a back rub while I'm at it," he added, tilting his head to look at the motel's entrance.

"Do you need help carrying the luggage inside?" Beca asked, offering to help although not really wanting to do it.

He shook his head. "It's not that much... I should get on it."

"You should," she agreed.

"Night, Becs."

"Night," she echoed and watched him turn on his heels. Her gut was telling her to call after him and pour her heart out yet she couldn't bring herself. She watched him as he disappeared into the building then shook her head and raised the window before she drove off.

* * *

The next day when she woke up, Beca felt like she had been run over by a car.

She laid on her stomach in bed and suffered in silence, deciding to do that for the day and hoping her back would hurt less by the end of the day if she made as little movement as possible.

"Amy, no," she sighed when her roommate hopped on the bed.

"Beca, yes," Fat Amy retorted, rubbing her hands together. "I watched a couple of videos on YouTube, I can do this."

"Leave me alone." She was seriously scared Fat Amy would somehow make things worse. "It's not that bad." She sat, biting back the pain the action brought. "I feel fine."

"You feel fine?" Fat Amy challenged.

"Yep." Beca nodded, yelping when Fat Amy jumped on her. "What the fuck are you doing?" she was angry yet her voice came off whiny.

"Proving a point." Fat Amy squeezed her in her arms.

"If you don't get off of me, I will fucking double cardio next time at rehearsals," Beca threatened.

"You can't even get out of bed, Beca" Fat Amy pointed out. "You sure making empty threats is in your best interest?"

Beca huffed and was about to lash out when they heard someone clear their throat.

"Hi," Jesse greeted, eyeing the two, a little puzzled by the scene. "Flo let me in, she told me you were up here," he said next. "What's going on _here_?" he wondered.

"I've been trying to give her a back rub and she wouldn't let me," Fat Amy recapped briefly. "Ungrateful little bitch." she sat up, letting go of her friend.

Beca glared at her. "I'd let you if you knew what you were doing."

"I told you I watched a couple of videos on YouTube," Fat Amy argued.

"I'll take over from here, Amy," Jesse chimed in. "I actually came over to see if a back rub is in order and it is."

"I'm okay, really," Beca lied again.

"She's not okay," Fat Amy called her out.

"I can see that," he smiled tightly. "And, I came prepared." He pulled a bottle of coconut oil from the pocket of his jeans.

"I'll leave you to it," Fat Amy said and stood up. She patted his shoulder, leaving the room.

"Do you need help taking off your sweatshirt?" he asked when she made no move to do so.

"No, I got it," she mumbled. "Wait," she sighed. "Turn around."

He nodded, understanding that she wasn't wearing anything underneath, and turned on his heels.

"Okay, you can turn around," she said once she was laying on her stomach.

* * *

"You never told me what you thought of your Christmas present," Jesse mentioned and pressed his finger against one of the many tensions knots he found.

"My what?" She looked up.

"You didn't see it?" He frowned. "Wow." He snorted and nodded behind him. "Explain to me how you missed _that_?" he wondered when she tilted her head to look at the brand new desk in the room that she somehow didn't see.

"I don't know," she mumbled, wrapping an arm around her chest before she climbed out of the bed, her back already hurting less, to go and check the studio desk.

"I figured you needed a more practical desk than the one you had, which is in the basement by the way. This one has a lot of surface space and isn't too big to take up much space in the room," he was saying as he walked over to where she stood.

"This is really cool," she said, drawing the slide-out keyboard surface where he had placed the keyboard he got her for her birthday. "I don't know what to say." A rare one for Beca, she always had something to say. "Thank you."

"I'm glad you like it. Come on, Weirdo." He threw his arm around her shoulder and turned her around with him. "I'm not done with you."

"Whoa, what are you doing?" she asked when he climbed on the bed after she laid down on her stomach.

"What do you mean?" he frowned.

"Dude, you're on top of me," she pointed out.

"Yeah?" He rested his hands on her shoulders. "Giving you a massage while sitting to your side is uncomfortable," he said with a shrug.

She tried to relax her muscles and act like having him on top of her wasn't doing anything to her and failed miserably. "This is so weird."

"This isn't weird at all. Stop trying to make it weird." She heard him say and tilted her head to glare at him.

"Okay, it's a little weird," he admitted. "Now that we got that out of the way, shut up about it and let me fix your back," he smiled at her and watched roll her eyes before she buried her face in the pillow.

"Your bitchy attitude isn't because of your back pain," he said breaking the silence they got in. "I've been around you when you were in serious pain and you weren't this bitchy," he noted. "What's wrong, Bec?"

"Nothing," she answered her voice although muffled audible.

"Is that so?" She could hear it in his voice, he didn't believe her.

"Yeah," she insisted.

He said nothing after that and carried on massaging her back in silence.

"Mom is having a baby." She knew why he was quiet, he was waiting for her to tell him what was bothering her but she wasn't falling for it.

"Wow," he stretched the word.

"Yep."

"Congrats," he said next and she realized that she never congratulated her mother.

"Thanks."

"This is what's pissing you off?" he asked doubtfully as he climbed out of the bed having finished.

"Well, no, because nothing is pissing me off." She sat up and wrapped her arms around herself.

He handed her the sweatshirt she had on earlier. "Amber doesn't even know you and she could tell that something was bothering you the entire time she was with you." He eyed Amy's corner of the room, as she got dressed.

"She told you that?" She frowned, pulling the sweatshirt over her head.

"Well, no. She just told me you're really quiet."

Beca remembered that she was meaning to ask Jesse what he had told Amber about her then decided not to. She knew he'd notice what the mention of Amber did to her and possibly link it to her _bitchy attitude_ as he called it.

"That doesn't mean anything." She sat Indian style and put on her best poker face yet.

"I won't try to make you talk but I'm here if you change your mind and wanna talk." He sighed before tilting his head. "Stop looking me like that." He chuckled humorlessly.

"Like what?" she questioned.

"Like you're trying to figure out my tactic to get you to open up," he answered.

"I'm not—" she was.

She could tell he knew she just lied to his face and it made her feel like shit. She wanted to open up. It just seemed easier in theory. She couldn't bring herself to let him know that her inability to tell him how she felt about him frustrated her to no end hence the bitchy attitude.

"Look, I'm here to hang out."

"I thought you said you're here to fix what driving for hours did to my back and also rub being right about it in my face, which you haven't done yet by the way."

"Well, that's part of hanging out," he explained. "We still have to do each other's hair, get drunk on champagne, and rate puppies."

"I'm not sure how I feel about letting you anywhere near my hair." She had a hard time maintaining her poker face when he was doing his impression of a valley girl.

"Oh, feel free to ask Sarah about my mad skills. I helped her dye her hair in a shady restroom in Nevada: it didn't look half as bad. I have pictures to prove it." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone to show her.

"Why would your sister even do that?" she wondered. "Dye her hair in a shady restroom, not ask for assistance," she clarified accepting his phone when he handed it to her.

"She claimed people were confusing us for a couple," he sighed. "So, she decided that going brunette would help highlight the features we share and couldn't wait until we found some hair salon."

"Did it work?" Beca asked, looking up from the very unflattering picture Jesse showed her of his elder sister while she ate a burger—she knew he kept it for blackmail.

"Yeah." He nodded. "I mean I got her a rainbow bracelet and cap at a store later the same day. But if Sarah asks, yeah it's definitely the hair change that made people stop assuming we're together," he deadpanned.

"Well, I don't plan to dye my hair but I'll let you know if I ever change my mind." She handed him his phone back.

"I know how to braid hair, too. Growing up, Sarah used to pay to braid her hair," he stated. "I'll do yours for free, though."

She rolled her eyes. "Thank you."

"Of course," he smiled.

"I'll go get us snacks," she figured, getting up. "I don't think we have any champagne, though."

"Cheap beer is fine," he said with a shrug.

"I'd say make yourself at home but you seem to act like you live here," she mumbled, stretching.

"I'm adding cleaning your room to the list of hanging out activities," he told her as she looked for socks in a pile of clothes laying on the floor. "I was afraid a rat would come out when I was moving the desk." He managed to dodge the combat boot she threw at him but didn't see the second one coming.

* * *

"This one is a good boy."

"You said that about the last one and the one before it," Beca deadpanned.

"They're all good boys," he argued.

"This is so dumb." She shook her head.

"Yeah, we can't rate puppies, they're equally exquisite good boys," he agreed. "Keep your head still, Bec."

She let him braid her hair after a few beers— His persistence got less annoying the more drinks she consumed.

"This is taking too long," she complained.

"Yeah, well, perfection takes time," he countered, bending to eat the Doritos chip she pulled from the bag.

She sighed and let him have the chip: he couldn't exactly get any himself since he was doing her hair and she most certainly didn't want her hair to smell like Doritos.

Five minutes later, he was done. "What do you think?" he asked, bringing a beer to his lips, while Beca checked his work in the mirror on the wall.

"Not bad, Swanson." She was impressed. "What's this kind of braid called?" she wondered.

"The Swanson," he said with a shrug. "It's my own creation."

"I hate to blow your bubble, buddy, but I have seen this before," she told him.

"Nah, you just saw something similar," he told her, confidently. "Besides, who's the braids expert here?" he asked while pointing at himself. "Me."

"You're so full of yourself," she mumbled, shaking her head.

"You're just jealous of my talented hands." He wiggled his fingers. "I can do so much with these." He sighed happily, eyeing his own hands.

"Are you seriously bragging right now?" She shouldn't be surprised, it was Jesse, a tipsy Jesse that is.

"Rightfully so," he wasn't going to deny it. "Want me to show you how to do a Swanson."

"Didn't you already teach me that?" she snorted, walking to where she left her beer and picking up.

It took him a few seconds before he got what she meant. "Good one," he chuckled. "I taught you a lot, haven't I?" he realized. "I mean credit when credit is due: you, my friend, are a fast learner." He paused. "I'm so proud of both of us."

"You're unbelievable." She shook her head, again. "Stop bragging."

"So, want me to show you how to braid hair like that or not?" he asked, leaning against the headboard and moving his legs so she could sit at the end of the bed then tossing her a pillow to put between her back and the wall.

"Well, yeah, but don't we need someone to braid their hair?" she pointed out, adjusting the pillow.

"Who's home? We can ask one of the girls to volunteer."

"Volunteer for what?" Stacie, who was walking in the hall, asked overhearing Jesse.

"Jesse wants to teach me how to braid hair and we need someone's head to do that," Beca elaborated.

"I was hoping you were gonna say threesome," Stacie said with a sigh, leaning against the doorway.

"She's not kidding," Beca said when Jesse chuckled.

"Nope," Stacie quipped. "I'd love to do that but I'm actually headed out… got an adult sleepover to attend." She paused for a second. "The invite said I can bring people with me. You know, the more the merrier," she told him.

"That sounds exhausting. I'm gonna pass," Beca declined.

"It wouldn't be _that_ exhausting actually," Jesse disagreed. "I don't even know where all the energy comes from when you're so tiny and the only form of sports you do is cardio which you barely do any of yet complain _so much_ about—why are you looking at me like that?" Beca was glaring daggers at him.

"I knew you're sex-enthusiast!" Stacie beamed. "Hold on." She arched an eyebrow, straightening up. "How would _you_ know, Jesse?"

"Uh, we talk about our sexual conquests all the time," Jesse finally said, getting why Beca looked like she was ready to murder him.

He said something he shouldn't have said.

"Sure," Stacie chuckled before she glanced at the time. "I'm running late. You two sure don't wanna tag along?"

"Nope," Beca said while Jesse just shook his head. "Nice job, dickhead." She kicked him in the shin once Stacie left the room.

"I didn't know you were keeping _it_ a secret," he argued and received a pillow in the face.

"Doesn't mean I want anyone to know," she said in annoyance, chugging down beer.

"Sorry," he apologized and tossed the pillow she hit him with on her lap—she still needed it. "I'm not sorry for what I said though," he cleared up. "I really think you're wrong about an orgy being exhausting. You can pull it off." He shrugged.

"I _think_ we should talk about something else," she replied, reaching for her backpack to look for her charger.

"Alright," he mumbled, stuffing his mouth with chips, and watched her empty the content of her backpack on the bed. "Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." He was going to ask her anyway, she knew it was rhetorical.

"Why do you keep a Polaroid camera?" He sat up to look grab the few photos on were in her backpack. "It's so unpractical. You can't check if the picture is good or not, you're stuck with it."

"That's exactly why I prefer them to digital cameras," she answered and climbed out of bed to plug the charger to an outlet and charge her phone. "When you take a picture with a digital camera you often end up taking a dozen more because the lightning wasn't right or it didn't flatter you. The moment you're trying to capture loses the spontaneous feel to it when you spend so much time trying to _get it right_ ," she explained.

"Deep," Jesse mumbled, eyeing the photos she took during Christmas.

"Hey, you asked." She shrugged, thinking he was mocking her.

"No seriously, that's deep," he said, taking her camera and bringing closer to his face. "I think I'm gonna go buy a Polaroid camera and carry it around from now on." He saw what she meant when he looked at the picture he took of her when she stood in front of the mirror to look at the braid once more.

"You look cute with your hair like that," he complimented, holding the photo for her to see it.

"Go ahead and pat yourself on the shoulder, I know you're itching to do that," she deadpanned. "Stop wasting the film, it's pretty expensive," she said when he took another picture.

She wouldn't really mind if she wasn't the subject of the second photo as well.

He ignored her. "We're taking a pretentious hipster type of picture. Do you have a flannel shirt?" He walked over to where she was standing in front of the mirror.

"Keep that scowl on your face, it's cute. Just look in the mirror." He nudged her.

She rolled her eyes, deciding to humor him.

"Yeah, I'm definitely getting a Polaroid camera," he decided while eyeing the photo he took. "It doesn't even look pretentious," he said when Beca peeked her head to take look at it.

"Should have gotten you to wear a flannel," he sighed.

"We're not taking more," she firmly said.

"I know. _"The moment you're trying to capture loses the spontaneous feel to it"_ ," he said, quoting her, and brought the camera to his face. "I'm a quick learner, too."

"Dude, stop." She tried to take it from him.

"I can't help it, you're very photogenic, Becs," he said with a shrug successfully taking a picture—it was a little blurry but that was totally a creative choice if anyone asked. "Or I might be really good at photography and never realized it," he added.

"You're getting a free photo shoot from yours truly, you should be ecstatic." He tapped her nose.

"That film you're wasting costs money," she reminded.

"I'll get you a year supply of film tomorrow if you stop bitching and let me enjoy my new passion," he said in mock annoyance and didn't miss the small twitch on her lips.

She couldn't stay mad at him even if she tried.

"Perfect," he murmured in his best photographer-like voice, snapping yet another one when she flipped him off while rolling her eyes.

"Why am I even friends with you?"

"Uh, that would because you love me," he answered as he shook the newest picture he took.

"No, I don't," she was quick to deny it.

"Yes, you do. You told me. I mean your fever was crazy high but I know you meant it." He looked up. "Don't worry, I said it back," he assured her.

 _'Fever? How romantic... Fuck.'_ Her heart felt like it was going to explode. She knew he couldn't tell because she was really good at maintaining a poker face.

She tried to wrap her mind around what he was saying and how he was saying it. Too casual. It didn't take her long before she figured it out.

It really hurt to know that his feelings were platonic. He wouldn't have assumed she meant it in a platonic way when she told him she loved if he didn't feel that way about her.

While it felt like someone stabbed her in the heart, she was glad she found out this way. It could have been worse. She could have embarrassed herself and ruined their friendship because there was no way they'd still be friends if he knew how she really felt about him.

The sound of the camera snapped her out of her thoughts: he had just taken another picture of her.

"I'm gonna keep copies of these. You can have the originals," he told her as he made his way to her desk to put the photos as well as the camera.

"Where's your laptop?" he asked, her room was too much of mess. "Found it," he said spotting it.

"Seriously, Beca, you need to clean your room," he sighed, starting the laptop and grabbing the cable connected the scanner to plug it into the laptop before he sat down. "I get the order in chaos theory but this is just chaos."

"You sound just like Dad," she grumbled, walking to where he sat and taking the pictures he planned to scan to look at them.

"Yeah, well, he has a point." He drew the keyboard slide-out surface. "I know I said I'd help out, and here's how." He cleared his throat, placing his fingers on the keyboard.

When he started playing and singing _Happy Working Song_ from Enchanted, she couldn't help the laugh that escaped.

She grabbed the camera and took a decent picture of him while he performed—unlike him, she knew a thing or two about photography but she wouldn't call photography her passion, though.

Her heart was breaking and she knew it was her fault: she waited too long.

And while it was awful, it sucked less when the reason she wanted to cry was singing a Disney song on top of his lungs to motivate her into cleaning her room.


	20. Chapter 20

AN: one of the reasons behind me taking this long to update is the fact that I wanted to make shit happen faster because I realized the pacing wouldn't be right if I stick to the og plan. I want the story to move at a reasonable pace and I don't want to mess with the what I have originally planned. Took me a while but I figured it out and here it is. :)

I hope you enjoy this long chapter. Let me know what you think.

 _Disclaimer: I do not endorse the use of illegal drugs (or anything illegal really.) I'm actually so square it annoys everyone in my life._

* * *

"Why is it that you're always the one doing this?" Jesse wondered as he watched Beca tiptoe to grab a cereal box. "Oh, wait, I know why," he figured, stuffing his hands in his pockets while Beca eyed what was next on the list that she and the girls put together of grocery they needed for the next two weeks. "You're the captain. You naturally assume leadership in everything. And, you _like_ being in control."

"Are you saying I'm a control freak?" Beca looked up from the list to look at Jesse who was peeking to see what was next on the list.

"I'm saying you're the alpha," he explained. "The girls expect you to take charge and they follow your lead."

"I doubt this has anything to do with leadership." She resumed pushing the cart, heading to a different aisle. "They just sleep in on Saturday morning like regular people." She, on the other hand, had to shit to do and could squeeze in grocery shopping.

Their last stop was in the liquor aisle which was the main reason Jesse tagged along: he was buying Beca liquor because she still couldn't do it—Stacie was turning 21 in a couple of weeks so it's probably the last time he went grocery shopping with her.

"We should go get milkshakes once we're done here," Jesse was saying as he picked a bottle of wine for himself while Beca got a beer pack.

"Milkshakes?" she echoed, scratching her temple as she eyed red wine options unsure which one to get—beer was easy, the girls thankfully collectively agreed on a brand they all liked.

"Yep." He placed the bottle in the cart. "Need help?"

"Which one of these isn't too sweet and also cheap?" she wondered, motioning vaguely at different brands of red wine.

"When did you become a wine person?" he asked as he looked for something that met her description—he didn't see wine on the list so he assumed it was for her.

"It's great with dinner." Over winter break, while at her grandmother's, she developed a habit of having a glass while dining.

"It really is," he agreed. "While on the road, Sarah and I found this Italian restaurant that made its own wine: best wine I ever had!" he recounted. "I mean the food was pretty good, but, man, was the wine amazing." Jesse placed the bottle of wine he picked for her in the cart. "I'll take you there someday…but for now I'm _taking_ you to the closest diner to get milkshakes."

"Why milkshakes?" she asked as they made their way to the cashier.

"The better question would be why not milkshakes?"

They loaded the grocery in her car and walked to the diner, Jesse telling Beca more about the Italian restaurant while she half-listened like she always did when Jesse got too worked up about something.—Usually it was a movie that _'she had to see.'—_ She knew he was just sharing his interests with her, which was fine, but it would great if he could just spare her the details sometimes.

* * *

"You know him?" Jesse asked, looking up from his menu and seeing that Beca was gazing at a guy sitting two booths away from them.

"Yep," she answered and grabbed the menu.

"Well, who is he?" he wondered.

"Pete," she answered curtly, still gazing at the menu.

Jesse looked back at Pete and frowned once got a good look at him. "He does not look happy."

Beca glanced at Pete who had the palm of his hand against his cheek while looking down at the table. And, yeah, he seemed pretty unhappy.

"I think you should go see what's up with him," Jesse said next.

"And why would I do that?" she asked in response.

"You're friends—"

"—not really."

"Beca, he's at a diner all by himself," he stated. "No one would be at a diner by themselves if they can help it."

"I would."

"If you're not going to go see if he's okay I will," Jesse said with a shrug.

"Fine," she mumbled, rolling her eyes, and got up.

"Invite him to sit with us if he's not waiting for someone." She heard him say as she began to walk away.

Pete didn't seem to notice her when she stood in front him so she cleared her throat.

He looked up.

"Uh, hi," she greeted and watched him sit up.

"Beca, hey," he said, sounding surprised. "Great seeing you outside of the radio station." He tried to smile but it was a weak attempt on his part.

"You, too," she replied. "I'm here with a friend and figured I'd come to say hi when I saw you," she added, gesturing at Jesse.

Pete nodded and glanced at Jesse who waved at him the moment their eyes met.

"Nice running into you," she said when he shifted his gaze to her.

"You, too," he smiled and watched her walk back to her table.

"Is he okay?" Jesse questioned the moment she sat down.

"He _seems_ fine."

"No, he doesn't," Jesse countered. "Okay, look at him. You can practically hear the sad music that would go with his expression."

"You know it's weird when you do that, right?" she checked. "Makes you seem like you're out of touch with reality and like delusional or something. Life isn't a movie."

"Just look at him," he urged. "I can hear it." He paused briefly. " _Hello, darkness my old friend. I've come to talk with you again_ ," he began to sing under his breath to which she rolled her eyes. " _Because a vision softly creeping. Left its seeds while I was sleeping. And the vision that was planted in my brain still remains within the sound of silence…_ "

"You're ridiculous," she noted when he looked at her expectantly. Why couldn't she see how well the music fit with the scene was beyond him. _She_ was ridiculous.

"I'm gonna ask if he wants to sit with us," he let her know.

She knew better than to object when Jesse was being his overbearing self.

"Hey, man," he called from his spot, gaining Pete's attention who had been staring out of the window. "Wanna come sit with us?" he wondered. "You're here alone, right?" he checked when Pete gave no answer.

"Er-yeah, I'm _alone_ ," he said with a nod.

"Pete, you don't have to if you'd like to be by yourself," Beca chimed in.

"But you're very welcome to sit with us," Jesse quipped.

Beca could tell Pete was weirded out by the two of them. She would be too, they must have confused him with their very different tones, she was sure she sounded bored and Jesse was _Jesse!_

"Okay," he accepted Jesse's invitation at last and got up. "Thanks," he smiled curtly as he slid into the booth beside Beca.

"I'm Jesse," Jesse said, introducing himself, and extended a hand towards Pete to who took it.

"Yeah, I know who you are... we met at Beca's surprise birthday party," Pete was saying as they shook hands. "Not surprised you don't remember, we barely spoke," he added.

"No, I remember you," Jesse mumbled— he didn't actually remember until Pete mentioned it, his memory from that night revolved around Beca.

"You got Becs that _cool_ mug," he snapped his fingers, recalling the Darth Vader mug that he wanted to purchase himself.

"Yep," Pete nodded.

"Where did you get it from? I've looked online and couldn't find that _one._ " The design was really good, he really wanted one for himself and one for Benji.

"Uh, this store just outside of campus," Pete informed. "Sells all sorts of movie-related stuff."

"I _now_ have to visit it," Jesse decided.

"Try not to buy everything you find in there," Beca said knowingly. She lost count of the framed movie posters he had AND the entire bookcase dedicated to action figures. He was a thirty-year-old man-child with a lot of money in his bank account.

"I can't promise that I won't," he said with a shrug, tilting his head when a waiter approached them to take their order.

He and Beca got milkshakes while Pete ordered a smoothie.

"You always come here?" Jesse casually asked as the waiter left their booth.

"Nope." Pete shook his head. "First time…" he trailed off, sighing.

"You alright, man?" Jesse asked.

"Yeah," Pete nodded. "I mean my date stood me out and couldn't bother to just text me that she wasn't coming and I'm pretty sure my parents are getting a divorce but I'm fine," he blurted out.

Beca and Jesse shared a look, surprised by what he just dropped on them. "Sorry," he chuckled humorlessly, noting their reactions that were similar.

"For what?" Beca was the one that asked while she resisted the urge to roll her eyes when Jesse gave her a look that said _, 'I told you he wasn't fine.'_

"Oversharing," he mumbled.

"No, please, let all out, man," Jesse encouraged. "You'll feel much better if you just talked about what's upsetting you," he advised. "We're both experts at listening," he gestured at himself and at Beca who nodded.

"I'm not upset that I got stood out," he began to say. "It's just that every time I get turned down every single time I asked a girl out. At this point, I'm pretty sure something is wrong with me... I guess I'm not likable," he mumbled sounding defeated.

"Don't say that. I'm sure you're likable alright," Jesse spoke confidently as if he knew Pete. "Rejection sucks but doesn't mean something is wrong with you."

"Yeah, dude, don't go there," Beca said, agreeing with Jesse. "Nothing is wrong with you." She had rejected him but it wasn't for the reason he cited.

"I wish they were all as straightforward as you were," he mumbled, meeting her gaze.

Beca could see Jesse raise his eyebrows despite the fact that she was looking at Pete.

"You said something about your parents?" she said, trying to change the subject because she really didn't want to get into it.

She never told Jesse that Pete asked her out and that she turned him down. She didn't want to get into the reasons behind why she said no to Pete and knew Jesse would ask. She also didn't want to lie to his face anymore.

He could tell when she lied to him: she could tell it hurt him whenever she did so she avoided subjects where she'd have to lie to him.

"Yeah." He looked down at the table. "While that sucks but it's okay if they got a divorce." He shrugged. "I just feel bad for my brother, he's six," he shared. "He called me 'cause he heard them fighting and was scared."

She reached over hesitantly and rubbed his arm, feeling Jesse's eye on her and willing herself not to look at him. She knew her action wasn't very Beca Mitchell and she held him responsible for it. He was the reason she stopped minding hugs and whatnot. _Ugh. She used to be so stoic_.

"When did he call?" Jesse questioned quietly.

"Er-last night," Pete informed.

"Where do you live, Pete," Jesse asked next.

Pete looked up and had a frown on his face. "New Orleans," he informed. "Why?"

"I think you should hop on the first bus there and go see your bother, you won't feel better until you do," Jesse confidently said. "You're worried about him and speaking over the phone won't cut it."

Pete considered it then shook his head. "I can't."

"Why?" It was Jesse's turn to frown.

"Long bus ride, not a lot of time," he replied, scratching his head. "I'd have to miss classes on Monday which I really can't do."

Jesse looked at Beca and the look he gave her spoke volumes to her.

She shook her head.

Damn his puppy eyes that bored into her soul.

' _Resist it, Mitchell.'_

She felt bad for Pete and his brother but it wasn't enough to drive to freaking New Orleans.

* * *

"Jesse, I'm not gonna do it," she said once Pete got inside the grocery store, leaving her alone with Jesse who was trying to make her feel bad with the looks he was giving her—she offered to give Pete a ride to campus, he accepted. Seeing that she parked her car near a grocery store, Pete figured he could get some of the stuff he ran out of.

"If it's about gas, I'll be happy to pay for it."

"It's not about gas money, Jesse."

"Then what is it? By car, it's barely a six-hour drive. If you leave now, you'll get there by three pm, Becs."

She looked away from him because he was giving her his signature puppy eyes.

"I'd drive him myself but it'll be weird I offered. I just met the guy." He shrugged.

"And, it wouldn't be weird if I offered?" she asked, tilting her head to look at him.

"Nope… why didn't you tell me that he asked you out and that you turned him down?"

"It's none of your business," she deadpanned.

"We're best friends, of course, it's my business."

She rolled her eyes.

"You let me braid your hair, Beca," he was saying as she pulled her car keys from her pocket and unlocked the car when Pete stepped out of the grocery store. "We're that kind of best friends."

"Don't you have a lunch date to get to?"

"Wow, a passive-aggressive version of fuck off. When did you get so civil?" Jesse said in amusement and walked around the car to open the trunk to get the wine bottle he bought. "Also, is it really a date when Theresa is around?" he asked, closing the trunk. "Come to think of it, Amber and I never really went on a date," he chuckled.

"Then ask her out on a date, idiot," she said in response.

Amber.

She really wanted to hate her but couldn't.

She couldn't blame her for heartache.

It was all her and she was dealing with the outcome of her actions, or lack of.

She couldn't muster the courage to tell Jesse how she felt.

Jesse and Amber started dating and from what he told her, which was, as usual, a lot, it was pretty casual and easy. She was happy for him. Happy that he was seeing someone who was as easygoing as Amber. She had her fair share of baggage but projected none of it on Jesse.

"Text me, weirdo," Jesse said, standing by the car, while Beca buckled seatbelt, shaking his head at the dirty look she gave him. It was great to have a friend who could read between the lines with whom he could have cryptic conversations.

She knew he wanted her to text him once they made it to New Orleans.

He looked behind her and at Pete who had just climbed in the passenger seat. " _You'll have bad times, but it'll wake you up to the good ones you weren't paying attention to,"_ he smiled curtly at Pete who nodded in response.

"Good Will Hunting," he said, recognizing the movie Jesse quoted.

"Yep," Jesse nodded, approving of Pete, and then looked back at Beca. "Drive safe, Becs" he smiled at her.

She rolled her eyes, flipping him off subtly, and pulled out of the parking lot.

"Great guy," Pete mumbled.

"Totally."

Another thing that being around Jesse changed was her selfishness, she will admit: she was quite selfish and rarely did anything that didn't directly benefit her somehow before meeting him.

The Bellas were also responsible, too, but with them, the selflessness came differently. They were her team: you can't be part of the team and lead the team if you only thought about yourself.

Jesse rubbed off some of his traits onto her: she couldn't complain because they were decent traits and made her a better person.

So, yeah, he was the one Pete should be thanking and not her when she offered to drive him to New Orleans by the time they made it to campus.

"I'm sure you'd do the same if you were in my place," she said and glanced at the time. "I have to drop the grocery at the house, I'll come to pick you up in half an hour," she told him. "Cool?"

"Okay, yeah, perfect. Half an hour," he said, nodding his head. "Thank you."

* * *

Having done a far longer road trip under a harsher weather, the trip to New Orleans was quite easy. They packed some snacks and hit the road, each driving three hours.

Climbing out of the car, Beca did stretches to avoid waking up with a fucked up back while Pete walked up to the front door.

His brother got the door and she saw exactly why it was a great idea to drive all the way there when the brothers hugged.

Looking at them, she wondered if she'd have a close relationship with her sibling. 20 years' one hell of an age difference. She decided that she was going to pull the effort and be the best big sister her baby brother or sister could have.

She watched the six-year-old wipe his eyes with the back of his sleeve before he and his older brother walked up to her.

"Beca meet Dan, my brother." He smiled down at his brother, his smile reaching his sad eyes. "Dan this is my friend Beca."

"Nice to meet you, Beca," the little kid said, his adorable lisp making Beca crack a smile.

"Nice to meet you, too, Dan."

"Danny, who are you talking to?" They heard a female voice call and titled their heads.

A teenager was at the door. "Pete, hey," she said in confusion.

"Hey, Izzy," Pete greeted. "Beca, this is our neighbor Izzy, she's babysitting Dan. Iz, this is Beca, my friend," he said, rubbing his brother's arm.

"Nice meeting you," Izzy politely smiled at Beca who returned the smile.

"Uh, Izzy, you can go home," he told her.

She nodded slowly. "'Kay." The girl was very puzzled by the fact that Pete was home from college but she kept to herself.

He pulled out his wallet and drew a few bills handing them to Izzy before she left.

"Come on, let's get you a coat," Pete smiled down at his brother.

It was sunny but the air was still cold despite it being February and February in Louisiana wasn't that cold.

"Where are we going?" Dan asked the question that was on Beca's mind.

"We need to show Beca around, Dan," Pete elaborated.

They weren't there so that Beca could explore New Orleans but and she knew why Pete said what he said. His brother was upset and playing tourist with her would take his mind off what was going on at home.

Pete left a note on the fridge for his parents in case they got home before they did and headed out to find Beca leaning against her car. "Ready to go?" she asked spotting him.

"Yeah," he nodded and opened the backseat door for Dan to get in.

Hanging out with the brothers wasn't so bad. They parked the car in a parking lot and walked around City Park, heading towards the playground there. It was clear how much Dan looked up to his older brother and how much he needed him. She definitely didn't regret driving all the way to New Orleans because it really was a great idea.

Given the fact that he spent most of his day playing in playground Dan was out like a light by the time they reached their house.

Pete held his brother in his arms and he and Beca made as little noise as they could as they walked towards the house.

"Hi, mom," Pete smiled his mother when she got the door, his voice low to avoid waking his brother up.

"Hey," she mumbled in an equally low voice before she stepped closer to him and placed a kiss on his forehead while she rubbed his arm.

"Uh, mom, this is Beca," Pete nodded at Beca who was standing next to him, introducing her. "A friend of mine."

"Pleasure meeting you, Mrs. Murphy," Beca politely greeted.

"You, too, Beca." Mrs. Murphy said stepping back. "Come on in," she murmured, taking Dan from Pete and pecking his temple once his head was against her shoulder.

"Where's dad?" Pete asked, glancing around them.

"He left," she curtly answered to which he frowned.

"What do you mean he left?"

"Last night, he packed his things and left," she sighed. "Lemme just put your brother to bed first then we'll talk."

"Okay," he nodded his head, doing an OK job at hiding how angry he was at his father.

Maybe because she spent a good chunk of her life angry with her father, Beca could see right through him.

"Guess we're spending the night here, huh?" Beca figured, holding her jacket in her hand once she took it off, and followed Pete further inside the house.

"No, I just have to talk to mom for a bit then we'll head out," Pete said in response.

"Seriously, dude, it's fine if we spent the night here." She shrugged. "Take your time with your mom. Besides, you can't leave without biding Dan farewell."

He smiled in spite of himself. "Thank you."

"Sure, man." She glanced at the staircase hearing footsteps. "Um, where's the bathroom?"

Pete pointed at the bathroom and watched her make her way to it.

"She's cute." She heared his mother say. "Your friend, huh?"

"Yeah, my friend, also my boss at the radio station," Pete was saying as she closed the bathroom door behind her.

What she appreciated the most about Pete was the fact that once he knew that she didn't feel the same about him he didn't try to change her mind or act like an asshole for rejecting him.

* * *

"I hope these fit you," Pete was saying as he handed her a t-shirt of his as well as a pair of boxer shorts.

"They'll fit. Thank you," she said accepting them. "And, thank you for letting me have your room," she added.

"Least I can do is let you have my room." He grabbed something to sleep in himself. "Good night, Beca," he said before leaving his bedroom.

"Good night," she echoed and watched him close the door behind him.

She tossed the clothes he handed her on the bed and started to undress before she changed into them.

She heard her phone chime with a text when she was pulling Pete's t-shirt over her head and walked over to where she left it, the pocket of her jack that she threw on the chair.

The text was from her mother, she smiled eyeing the attachment which was an ultrasound before she scrolled down to read what her mother texted next: _'it's a girl.'_

* * *

"Thanks," Beca said accepting the bag Pete handed her.

"You welcome, Boss," he smiled before he stepped back.

She looked inside the bag and breathed in the delicious smell of her lunch. She wouldn't have asked Pete to get her lunch if he wasn't going out to buy lunch for himself and she was so busy with work.

"Hey, Pete," she called, looking up.

"Yeah?" He sat down and pulled his chair closer to the desk, placing his own lunch on it.

"You free this weekend?" she asked.

"Uh, yeah," he answered. "Why? Need me to fill in on the weekend?" he guessed.

"No, no." She usually put a lengthy playlist to play over the weekend so that no one had to give up their free time. "My friend's birthday is this weekend and she's throwing a 70s themed party if you wanna come."

Ever since they got back from New Orleans, Pete was a little depressing to be around. She wasn't around him that much but she didn't see him dancing to the beat as he stacked CDs like he used—she played music she knew he liked when she started to notice how he'd been acting and seeing that he didn't even nod to the music was enough for her.

She understood why he was feeling low: his family was falling apart, which was a travesty, but it wasn't the end of the world and he had to keep on living hence the invite.

"Do I have to dress up?" he asked.

"Yep," she nodded.

"Okay," he said, figuring he'd have to buy something to wear to the party. "I'll drop by, thanks," he said, accepting the invitation.

"Cool." She watched him pull his burger from the bag and frowned. "Changed your mind about what you're having for lunch?" she asked.

"Huh?"

"You said you're getting a burrito," she reminded.

"Er-yeah," he nodded to which she rolled her eyes.

"You just said that so I'd let you buy me lunch?" The closest Taco Bell wasn't that close to campus, she wouldn't have agreed to let him buy her lunch if he didn't tell her he was getting something from Taco Bell for himself.

"Not a big fan of Mexican food," he admitted, her glare would get him to admit to a murder.

Not that she didn't appreciate it, because she did, but he didn't have to do that for her.

"But I don't mind getting it for you," he added.

"Thank you, Pete," she said, stepping back inside the booth.

* * *

Jesse never thought he'd go to college party once he graduated but here he was almost 9 years later at the doorstep of the Bellas' house where a party was taking place—it was a birthday party but it was still a college party.

The theme was the main reason he decided to go. He wanted to see what they'd done with the place because Beca complained enough about how seriously the girls took decoration. She helped them but she complained the whole time— it wouldn't be Beca if she didn't bitch while doing something.

However, he planned to give Stacie her present, wish her a happy birthday and head out.

He nodded along to the current song playing, _Already Gone by Eagles_ , as he made his way into the house. The girl did a great job: the place really looked very 70s.

Jesse looked around for familiar faces and quickly found them. He grinned once his eyes fell on Beca who shouting over the loud music the chorus of the song with Benji.

He began walking to them but stopped when he spotted Stacie. "Happy Birthday," he shouted over the music before he handed her the present he got for her. "This is great." He gestured around him.

"Thanks," she said, accepting it, in an equally loud voice.

"Drinks are over there, help yourself out," she told him, nodding at the refreshment table.

He smiled and watched her walk away then turned on his heels feeling a tap on his shoulder: it was none other than Beca Mitchell.

"You came," she said, sounding surprised.

"Yeah." He took her hand and spun her around to get a full look of what she was wearing. "You look like you're on your way to Woodstock," he told her.

"That's because I'm recreating a look," she told him and took a sip from the red solo cup she was holding.

"From Woodstock?" he frowned.

She nodded, stuffing her hand in her back pocket and pulling her cellphone.

She kind of looked like the woman in the picture she showed him. Her mother was born in the 70s and the original Woodstock festival happened in '69. "Your grandmother?" he guessed.

"Yup!"

"Nice." He looked at Beca then at the picture on the phone. She was pulling the look off quite well: headband around her forehead, a shirt that he could only describe as hippie tucked into a pair of denim shorts.

Looking back at Beca, he watched her close her eyes and inhale deeply.

"You okay?" he asked in puzzlement.

She nodded, her lips twitching upwards before she opened her eyes. "I'm okay." She chugged what was left of her drink before she placed it on the floor. "Let's dance," she said, taking his hand and dragging him to the dance floor. The Beca he knew wouldn't dance unless she was in competition or had a few drinks and loosened up which made him wonder how much she had to drink when it was only 9 pm.

"You put the playlist together?" he checked as they danced the groovy tone of _Hot Chocolate_ titled _Every 1's a Winner_.

"Yeah," she answered. "Who else takes care of _that_ 'round here?"

"You're giving it to me later," he told her.

"Okay, now shut up and dance, nerd."

He obliged.

True, he originally planned to leave early but his plans changed. He decided to extend his stay but only after he promised himself he wouldn't let himself get drunk.

Beca left to get a drink for herself and asked if he wanted something and he settled for a beer.

"Punch?" he asked, peeking into her cup after she handed him his beer.

She shook her head. "Sports drink."

He watched her take a sip before he held her chin up to get a better look at her, how did he miss how large her pupils were? "Molly?" Jesse guessed.

Ecstasy's worst dangers were dehydration and heatstroke and sports drink contained an awful lot of electrolyte ei what her body needed to minimize the short term, yet fatal if not taken seriously, damage of the drug.

"Yep," she nodded. "I'm tripping balls but I'm being careful so don't worry," she told him, noting the frown that formed on his forehead. "A couple of glasses of this." She pointed at the cup in her hand. "Every hour and I set my phone to remind me." She showed him the hourly reminders she had set up on her phone.

He nodded slowly and watched her drown the drink.

"Fucks sake, Amy!" she exclaimed when Fat Amy bumped into her and spilled the drink she had in hand on her shirt.

Fat Amy didn't bother to apologize, she just patted Beca's shoulder and moved passed her.

Jesse always found the scowl on her face cute and this time was no different. "Just change your shirt," he told her. "The stain is no biggie. Just some detergent and it'll be gone."

She sighed and turned on her heels. He found himself following her.

Reaching her bedroom, he leaned against the doorway and brought the beer to his lips.

"Dark side of the moon came out in the 70s right?" He heard her ask.

"Yeah," he answered and shifted his gaze away from her when she began tugging at her shirt. She usually told him to look away, she might be high and careless, but he knew she wouldn't want him to look at her change.

He looked back as she was tugging the t-shirt into her shorts.

Her t-shirt brought up memories that he avoided thinking about because they were friends and it wasn't right to think of his _best friend_ naked so he shoved the memory of their first time (her first time ever) to the back of his head along with other indecent memories of her.

"Jesus," she murmured stopping in front of the mirror. "Why didn't you tell me I look like this?" she asked, gesturing at her face.

"What do you mean?" he puzzled, stepping closer. "You look fine, Becs," he said, eyeing her through the mirror, a few feet behind her.

"Like I just survived a massacre at Camp Crystal Lake." He'd point out the fact that she made a movie reference if he wasn't busy staring at her. "Thank God back in the day they didn't wear much eye makeup." She grumbled using her forearm to wipe the sweat that formed on her forehead. "I would have looked like a panda by now if I wore makeup the way I usually do."

"Pandas are cute," he mumbled and chuckled when she stopped to glare at him.

Jesse watched her with curious eyes when she closed her eyes for the second time since he got there, wondering what was going through her _high_ mind—MDMA was one hell of a drug.

"Feels good, huh?" he asked when she happily sighed snapping out of whatever state she slipped into.

"Feels _ecstatic_ ," she grinned, turning on her heels.

Humming along to the song playing downstairs, _Cheap Trick's I Want You to Want Me_ , he extended his hand.

She took it, figuring he was going to lead her out of the room, but got pulled closer. "Oh, we're dancing here?"

"Yeah, it's really loud downstairs. My ears need a break," he mumbled as they began to sway to the beat.

"Stacie wants it loud." She shrugged. "So I made sure it's loud."

"Of course, you did," he said, shaking his head as he thought of their poor neighbors.

"She wanted it to be loud enough to cover up for sex noises around the house throughout the night. She plans to go twenty-one rounds," she casually mentioned.

"Wow."

"It's both disgusting and genius."

"Did she tell you this?" he wondered.

She nodded. "She asked if I wanted to _help_."

He arched an eyebrow, slowing down with the dancing. "And by help you mean, sleep with her?"

She nodded again. "I declined. I'm all for experimenting while in college but I'm done screwing my friends." The last thing she needed was to develop feelings for Stacie.

"Hold on, does this mean you'd experiment with a girl?"

"Not something I want to do _really_. But, who knows?" She shrugged.

His mind went straight to picturing Beca engaging in same-sex sex and it was wild.

He swallowed feeling tightness in his jeans caused by the work of his imagination.

' _This is wrong,'_ he scolded himself and tried to shake it off, picking up the pace as he danced. Beca didn't seem to notice the change—if he was _tripping balls,_ as she called it, he wouldn't either.

"I don't remember it like this," she said as they danced.

"Huh?"

"Tripping. Last time I did this I don't remember feeling this _good_." Last time was almost a year ago, she took MDMA when she went out clubbing to get her mind off of all the fighting with her parents. She almost swore the drug off then Cynthia Rose offered her some and she couldn't decline, figuring the girls would have her back if it went south.

"Different reasons, different reactions," he said in response. "Last time was that time you called me in the middle of the night to come and get you from that sadist you left with?"

"Yeah," she affirmed.

It was one of the most regrettable things she ever did.

"You were pissed at your parents and going through stuff. This time around you're celebrating your friend's birthday," he reasoned then spun her around abruptly.

He wrapped an arm around her waist to steady her noting that his action disoriented her. "Sorry," he apologized.

"It's okay," she smiled.

"What's so funny?" he questioned when she bit her button lip, holding back a chuckle and looking away.

"Nothing." She looked back at him. He gave her a pointed look. "It's not even funny," she began to say.

"Well, now I really wanna know what it is."

She sighed. "I was wondering how kissing would feel like when I'm high on E," she shared with him.

"We can do something about that."

She stopped dancing, confused by his words. "You have a girlfriend."

"We're dating but Amber isn't my girlfriend." He wanted to pursue something with her but when she told him she wasn't looking for a serious relationship and preferred casual dating he rolled with it. It was going great so far.

Jesse could see the wheel turning in Beca's head as she thought about it.

"No tongue," she finally said and stepped closer.

"Any way you want it, Becs," he smiled as she threw an arm around his shoulder.

He didn't have drugs in his system and barely had any alcohol, yet he felt highly intoxicated when she pressed her lips against his.

She pulled away only seconds later and left him wanting more.

"So?" he asked, playing it cool.

"Disappointing," she mumbled. "I was expecting fireworks."

He wouldn't say it felt like fireworks were going off but it was anything but disappointing.

"I want a redo," she said. "I take back what I said about using tongue," she decided. "Would that be okay with you?"

It was adorable that she was asking for his consent before she kissed him.

"Of course," he responded almost instantly, hoping he didn't look as eager as he really was.

Calling Beca a great kisser was an understatement.

God, he missed kissing her. The inappropriate memories he was trying to forget flashed through his mind as she slipped one of her hands under his t-shirt. Her warm hand feeling his torso was all it took for his self-control to go out of the window.

He picked her up and walked to her bed, all the while kissing her.

She pulled away, panting, and tugged at his t-shirt.

Jesse was more than happy to get rid of it before he found her lips again.

She dug the fingers of her right hand in his scalp, bringing him closer, and cued for the fireworks she mentioned to go off.

Her t-shirt was on the floor, keeping his own t-shirt company, seconds later.

He moved to her neck, placing open-mouthed kisses, in dire need of air but a much bigger one for her.

She was in the process of pushing his jeans down when he unhooked her bra so she paused what she was doing to get rid of it.

The rest of their clothes were gone by the time the song that was playing ended.

Ironically, _T. Rex's Get It On_ was up next in the playlist. If she wasn't preoccupied Beca would have sneaked a snarky remark, Jesse was sure she would. He, on the other hand, liked having a soundtrack to their lovemaking. Beca would call him gross if he called sex _that_ in front her.

Jesse lost track of the songs eventually— Beca had his full attention and who would dare blame him?

* * *

"This song came out in the eighties," Jesse noted, looking up from her neck and pecking her cheek.

"Huh?" she was too dazed to try and figure out what he was talking about.

" _Africa_ ," he paused. " _Africa_ came out in the eighties," he told her. "Thought this was Seventies only."

"Stacie hates it so I put it in there to mess with her," she explained as he pushed her hair from her face. He was sweating too but not as much as her and it for no other reason than taking Molly. Dripping in her sweat, she still looked beautiful as ever—she oddly smelled great, too.

She ran her fingers through his mess of hair, her eyes carrying something he couldn't put his finger on yet felt like he knew.

He frowned when she sniffled looking away from him and tilted his head to look at her.

"Why are you crying?" he asked, using his thumb to wipe her tears away. "Beca?"

"These are happy tears, Jess," she assured him. "I get why people do drugs before they have sex: Best feeling ever." She didn't sound very happy so he couldn't exactly buy what she was saying.

"I don't believe you." He rubbed his thumb against her cheekbone. "Something is up definitely with you. It's me, Becs, you can tell _me_ ," he urged, starting to worry when tears wouldn't stop streaming down her face.

She shook her head, "That's the thing: I can't," she chuckled humorlessly. "You'd think being high would fucking help but nope." She sniffled. "I can't tell you and it fucking hurts." She pushed him away and he obliged. Distancing himself from her made him physically ache for her.

"Why can't you?" he quietly asked, watching her pull the duvet close to her when she sat up.

"At this point, I'm not sure anymore," she murmured, continuing to sniffle, and reached to pick up her underwear from the floor. "I think it's my parents but I don't know." She shrugged.

"Your parents?" He watched her slip on her underwear.

"Huh-uh." She looked up when he climbed out of the bed and locked the bedroom door. "Was it open the whole time?" she asked, mortified.

"Yep," he answered, removing the key.

"That's just perfect." She shook her head and continued wearing her clothes.

She saw him get rid of the condom in the bin under her desk and ignored him when he sat down on the bed.

"You know, I'm not gonna leave you alone until you tell me, right?" He caught his clothes when she tossed them at him and put them beside him only wearing back his boxers. He wasn't in a hurry to get dressed.

"And you know how good I am at avoiding things, right?" she reminded before she rushed to the door only to find it locked and that the key missing.

"Jesse, open the door," she demanded, turning on her heels to face him.

"I don't have the key, feel free to look around," he told her, gesturing at her very messing side of the room. "Told you to clean this mess, Beca," he sighed, noting the glare she shot him.

He didn't want to fight. He just wanted to know why she cried. He was trying to figure it out himself but it was somewhat hard when he had just had sex. He wanted to crash, Beca cuddling up to him preferably.

"Fine, guess we'll just sit here." She shrugged and sat down on Fat Amy's bed.

"If that's what you want." He shrugged as well.

They sat in silence for what was left of _Toto's Africa_ and the next song, _Alice Cooper's No More Mr. Nice Guy._

"You're not thinking of climbing out of the window, are you?" he questioned, watching her gaze out of the window.

She tore her eyes away from the window to scowl at him.

"You, my friend, are very unpredictable. Don't blame me for thinking you might do it." He watched her look out of the window again and started stomping his foot to the beat of the song playing.

He recognized it as _Steely Dan_ 's _Reeling in the Years_.

By the end of the song, she was crying again.

She was breaking down and he didn't know how to fix things. He couldn't fix what he didn't know. He also couldn't just sit and watch her cry.

He walked the few feet between the beds and got down on his knees. "Beca," he called, resting his hand on her knee, stilling her shaking leg. "I'm sorry," he apologized.

"Just open the damn door, Jesse, I know you have the key," she choked on her own tears, struggling to keep her emotions in check.

He squeezed her knee, silently begging her to tell him what was upsetting her so much—also, she was right, he had the key and his weak ass wasn't going to stand seeing her crying any longer.

He was about to get up when he heard her quietly singing along to the song playing downstairs while looking at the sky through the window. _"'Cause I'm getting weaker, weaker, every day. I guess I'm not as strong as I used to be. And if you use me again it'll be the end of me."_

She sniffled tilting her head to look at him and flashed him the saddest smile he'd ever seen on a person as she started to sing the chorus, _"'Cause when the loving starts, and the lights go down. There's not another living soul around. You woo me until the sun comes up. And you say that you love me."_

She was singing to him, he realized. Dumbfounded by how much of an idiot he was for not figuring it out himself, Jesse got up and pulled her up with him. Of course, it was Love he saw her in her eyes. His heart hurt but in a good way as he pressed his lips against hers.

She wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders, kissing him back and pulling him closer.

Breaking the kiss, she buried her face in his neck and closed her eyes savoring the moment.

* * *

AN: The last song is Say you love me by Fleetwood Mac.


	21. Chapter 21

AN: Hi, people. Sorry for being away for such a long period. Without further ado, here's the next chapter. It would be great to hear your thoughts on it and how you think the story will go from here.

* * *

Time moved slowly. The loud music outside felt so far away and Beca liked it that way. She also liked that Jesse was humming the song while they slow-danced to it. She relaxed a little when he didn't utter a word, silently assuring her that she hadn't ruined their friendship by confessing how she felt about him. She rested her against his shoulder and smiled a little to herself: Things were going to be okay.

"Bec?" Jesse called gently.

She answered with a hum, loosening her hold a little.

"Your phone is ringing, I think," he told her.

She tilted her head to look at her phone that was on the desk. "No, that's the reminder I set up," she let him know.

"It's been an hour already?" he mumbled in surprise.

She had a different opinion: it felt longer than an hour.

"Where do you keep the sports drinks? The fridge?" he wondered. "Okay, stay here, I'll get you some of that," he said when she nodded.

Beca stuffed her hands in the back pockets of her shorts when Jesse stepped away to wear his clothes.

"The key?"

"Right." He walked over the garbage bin under her desk and pulled it.

She took it from him and went to unlock the door.

"Wait." He grabbed her by the arm when she turned the key inside the lock. He slipped his arm around her waist as he stepped closer. "Please, don't run away," he mumbled, studying her face. "I really don't want to spend the night looking for you." Also, worrying since she was on drugs.

"I'm not planning on going anywhere other than the bathroom down the hall," she replied to which he nodded.

Jesse then dropped the hand that was on her waist and stepped back, watching her turn on her heels to unlock the door.

He stood in the doorway and waited until she entered the bathroom before he began making his way down the stairs.

The party was on fire, everyone seemed to be having fun. He saw the Bellas dancing and wondered how many of them were tripping just like Beca then figured he'd ask Beca later.

Jesse got what he went down for and rushed to find Beca.

The bathroom door was open and Beca was standing in front of the sink, patting her face with a towel.

She had her hair, a little wet, up in a lazy bun, and had ditched the headband. She also had little to no makeup left on her face from washing up and she never looked prettier.

"Thanks," Beca said, accepting the cup from Jesse and waited until he poured the drink from the bottle.

It wasn't exactly awkward silence that fell but it surely wasn't the most comfortable. They stood in the hallway: Beca chugging the sports drink while Jesse watched her.

"Now what?" she asked, taking the bottle from his hand and pouring a second cup—he could tell she was thirsty and wanted actual water but in her current state sports drinks were the safest option.

"Now," he dragged the word. "We wait until you sober up 'cause we need to talk."

"We're talking right now. I mean it's kind wobbly still and weird… you know how ecstasy works." She waved her hand, failing to describe how she was feeling under the influence of the drug. "But I feel fine. I can talk." She frowned noting the look on Jesse's face.

He seemed thoughtful and a little anxious.

"Hang on," she said in realization. "This isn't about me sobering up."

"What?" he puzzled.

"You need time to figure out how you're gonna deal with this," she continued, gesturing between them. "You only kissed me because you knew I'd feel better. Because you felt bad for me."

"Beca," he called.

She stopped talking to hear him out then let out a humorless chuckle when he said nothing.

"I'm such an idiot," she mumbled, shaking her head.

"Beca, no, that's not it," he said, following her when she began walking away. "I do need time. But it's not for the reason you mentioned."

"What is then?" She stopped walking and turned to face him.

He had nothing to say. Again. He just stuttered for a few seconds.

She rolled her eyes and walked faster.

He cursed under his breath and followed her.

Hurrying down the stairs, he bumped into Pete. "Sorry," he apologized over the music and was about to continue rushing after Beca when he got a better look at Pete: He looked pale.

"You alright, man?" he asked, glancing around to see in which direction Beca went.

Pete looked at him in confusion and said something incoherent—it was both his slurred speech and the loud music that made it hard for Jesse to figure out what he said.

" _Okay_ , you're not okay." Jesse pressed a couple of fingers against a pulse point on Pete's neck to check his heart rate only to find out that the boy was quite cold.

He had to make a choice: Either go after Beca who was high out of her mind and pissed at him or stay and make sure Pete, whose breathing was abnormal and clearly had too much to drink and could be having an alcohol poisoning, was okay.

Jesse inhaled deeply as he supported Pete's weight, helping him climb the stairs.

* * *

Pete dropped to his knees as soon as he was in front of the toilet bowl.

"No, no, no," Jesse was quick to say when Pete laid down in the fetal position after he was done throwing up. "Don't fall asleep." He helped him into a sitting position.

"Who are you?" Pete slurred in puzzlement.

"Fuck," Jesse muttered, realizing that his worries were right. Pete had alcohol poisoning. He had to take him to the ER or call in an ambulance: he decided to go with the former option. An ambulance would surely ruin the ambiance of the party.

* * *

On the way to the hospital, Jesse could only think about Beca when he wasn't checking in on Pete and making sure he hadn't fallen asleep.

Her current state worried him to no end.

Campus security made students carry rape whistles! Rape. Whistles.

He was justifiably worried sick about her but couldn't exactly leave Pete alone at the hospital. The staff informed Jesse that they're going to wait until Pete's alcohol levels gradually dropped before releasing him.

Pete's alcohol poisoning wasn't severe mainly because he was rushed to the hospital as soon as he began experiencing the symptoms. Jesse hoped it wouldn't take long because he really wanted to go and look for Beca.

Somewhere around 1:30 am, Jesse went to get himself a cup of coffee. On his way back, he walked by the reception and couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Beca talking to the receptionist.

"Beca!" he called in surprise. "Oh my god, what happened?" he asked, hurrying towards her when he saw that she was hurt.

"I fell," she curtly answered before nodding at the receptionist who told a doctor would examine her shortly and accepted the form that was handed to her.

He frowned watching her limp towards a chair and wasn't sure he believe her when she said she fell.

From the scratches on her arm and how swollen her forearm was, he could tell that it was painful—the poker face she held showed none of the pain.

She was tough.

She also seemed sober.

He watched her try to write despite the fact she couldn't exactly move her arm then sighed and took the form from her hand as he sat down next to her.

She did manage to write her first name, which he found impressive.

He began filling in the information he already knew and left the stuff he didn't know to ask her about later.

"I drove Pete here," he informed her which got an actual reaction from her.

"What happened?" she asked not hiding her worry.

He filled her in.

She nodded and shifted her gaze away from his as soon as he finished talking.

"So, did you get outnumbered by raccoons?" he asked, looking at her arm. "And had to fight your way out?" She rolled her eyes: he considered it a win.

"I fell," she repeated her curt answer from earlier.

"Yeah, I got that. But like, did you fall trying to escape the wrath of pissed off raccoons?" He could see a hint of a smile but it was gone in a second— _another point for Swanson!_

"If you must know I fell into the empty pool," she told him.

"The empty pool?" he echoed in confusion. He knew which pool she was talking about, the one a cappella groups where did their riff-offs. "How did you even up there?" He had a lot of question but he went with the most obvious one and received what he could only interpret as an attempt at shrugging.

He looked up seeing a nurse walk their way and was glad to hear that she'd be taking Beca to see the doctor who would be treating her.

He watched Beca limp behind the nurse and followed her glad no one tried to restrain him.

The doctor gave her very strong painkillers before he manipulated her dislocated elbow back into its place. Luckily, it was just dislocated and there was no nerve damage but the doctor told her to see orthopedist within the next 48 hours before putting her arm in a splint to make sure her elbow joint healed properly.

As for her ankle, it was just sprained.

"You gonna walk home?" Jesse said in disbelief following Beca when she walked past him, ignoring he was even there.

"Does it look like I'm flying home to you?" she deadpanned heading towards the hospital entrance.

"Jesus," he sighed before he jogged after her. "We need to talk."

"No, we don't." She shook her head.

"Yes, we do. I can't stand this… whatever it is." He grabbed her right arm and pulled her back to get her to stop. "I thought it could wait until tomorrow when you're less mad at me but I can't wait." He shrugged, letting go of her arm.

"Oh, now you can't wait to talk?" She let out a humorless and chuckle. "Well, I don't. Forget everything that happened. And while you're at it forget about me." She resumed walking. (Read: limping.)

"You're just saying that because you're mad at me," he reasoned. "I'd be mad at me, too, for letting you walk away without explaining why I needed some time to think." He fell into step with her. "Five minutes. Give me five minutes that's all I'm asking."

She rolled her eyes then let out a breath and rubbed her eyes. "The drugs the doctor gave me are really strong—"

"I understand," he interrupted, aware that she's feeling drowsy from the painkillers. "Just give me five minutes to explain," he requested.

"Fine." She dropped her hand.

He rubbed the back of his neck, figuring to get right into it and hoping she wouldn't ignore him and talk back. "'Round this time last year, I started to develop a crush on you," he shared with her. "I mean it took me about a month to realize that I was crushing hard on you because I was busy feeling sorry for myself and hating every aspect of my life but yeah, it was 'round this time last year." He let out a breath. "I ignored it at first then flat out denied it being more than a tiny crush. When we ended things, I planned to stop talking to you and failed... I eventually sacked up and distanced myself by literally creating so much distance between us and making it hard to keep touch while on the road with Sarah. My feelings for you faded over the summer and I assumed so did yours." The whole time he spoke, she looked at her feet. However, the last thing he said made her look at him.

"You knew?" she questioned in both confusion and surprise.

"You serenaded me, Becs. That was a kind of dead giveaway," he stated.

"I didn't even know I had a _crush_ on you at that point," she deadpanned.

"I know," he smiled, a little amused. "I figured that you got over it over summer like I did." He shrugged. "I really thought I was over you," he sighed, his fingers brushing against hers.

"You're my best friend and my feelings for you went from platonic to romantic to platonic to romantic _again_ over the span of a year. Like, what does that say about me?"

"You're just confused." She cleared her throat, pulling her hand away from his reach. "Think about it, we slept together and I got very sappy—I'm blaming ecstasy by the way— You felt bad and did what you did to make me feel better."

"You got it all figured out, huh?"

She shrugged in response.

"Well, you're wrong. Very wrong." He didn't miss the eye roll his words earned. "I'm serious." He took her hand in his. "While yours truly is weak and was so close to giving in and letting out of the room, the thought of kissing you just to make you feel better _never_ crossed my mind." He squeezed her hand.

He wasn't sure why he kissed her— _it just felt like the right thing to do._

"I wouldn't hurt you like that." He frowned hating that he couldn't read her expression. "These feelings caught me off guard, Becs."

"Same," she mumbled back.

"I needed some time to process. I should have said that instead of telling you we should wait until you sober up."

"You should've," she agreed.

"I'm sorry," he apologized. "I promised I'd never let anyone break your heart yet here I am…" he trailed off, sucking a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

He expected her to walk away or insult him or both but surprisingly she did neither. She instead threw her arm, the one not in a splint, around his waist and hugged him.

He hugged her back, mindful of her injury.

"I'm really sorry," he apologized again, placing a peck on her hair.

She nodded into his chest while tightening her grip around his waist, wordlessly telling him that she accepted his apology.

When she loosened her hold, he stepped back and held her chin up to get a better look at her face. She looked exhausted, barely standing on her feet exhausted.

"Wanna have a coffee with me or something sometime next week?"

"If or something is _going to the movies_ then no," she replied making him chuckle, not only for the choice of her words but also for the way she said it. She really was tired. It was great of effort for her to talk.

"While I love movies movie dates suck. You don't even get to talk."

"On second thought, that sound pretty good. Let's do that." She patted his chest.

"Beca, I know you haven't been doing much dating but talking is pretty important especially on a first date."

"We know each other very well so I don't think it would be _that_ important," she countered. "And who said anything about going on a date?" He couldn't tell if she was joking around or really didn't register the fact that he just asked her out.

"I acknowledge the point you make but I stand by what I said," he said slowly, thinking about what he should say next. "This will be your first ever date ever, Becs. I have to make sure it's great," he finally said.

' _That should clear it up,'_ he thought to himself once the words left his mouth.

"Alright, nerd, surprise me…" she mumbled.

"You'll have a great time," he assured her.

Like she said, they knew each other very well.

"I should go check on Pete," he told her, hoping to find that his alcohol levels dropped enough to go home. "Wanna stay in the car until I'm back?" he wondered, subconsciously placing his hand over his pocket and feeling his car keys.

She shook her head. "I'll go with you." She sighed. "He wouldn't be here if I didn't invite him to the party in the first place."

"Wrong. He wouldn't be here if didn't drink too much," he corrected.

"So, how did you fall?" he wondered as they walked.

She let out a heavy sigh. "I found a kitten that was clearly lost… like, he was meowing super loud and all. I figured I'd look around for his family."

"Aw," he cooed.

"Yeah, well, I found his family. There were a bunch of other kittens in the pool. To say the least, the mother wasn't as appreciative as you'd think," she deadpanned.

"She attacked you?"

"Yep!" she showed him the scratches the protective cat left on her calf. "I was standing too close to the empty pool…" she trailed off.

"Was the kitten with you when you fell?" he questioned.

"Yes." She rolled her eyes when he gasped.

"He's fine."

"Okay, thank god." He had to hold back a smile when she shot him a glare. "Although getting scratched up by an angry protective mama is less badass than getting outnumbered by raccoons it's still badass." He laughed when she elbowed him with her good arm.

* * *

Jesse went to check on Pete and Beca stayed behind to get something from the vending machine and when he came back accompanied by Pete she was asleep on a chair. He wasn't surprised. She had strong painkillers in her system. And, prior to that, she had taken MDMA.

He didn't even think about waking her up. He just carried her bridal style to his car where he helped her lay in the backseat while Pete finished filling out his paperwork before leaving.

"How much do I owe you?" Pete asked as Jesse handed him an energy bar he got from the vending machine.

"For this?" Jesse frowned. "Nothing. It's just an energy bar."

"No, for paying for my medical bill."

"You owe me and _yourself_ a promise to drink responsibly." Jesse patted his shoulder as they headed out of the hospital.

* * *

Pete fell asleep on the ride and Jesse considered waking him up then decided to let him spend the rest of night at his place.

Never in a million years would have Jesse thought a day would come where he'd carry not one but _two_ college kids bridal style to bed.

But here he was, at 2:25 am carrying a 20-year-old boy who was taller than him, he might add, to sleep in his guestroom—he was glad the room was on the first floor because he was sure as hell not going to able to carry him up the stairs and not hurt his back in the process.

He then took Beca to his own bedroom, which easier since she's heavily medicated and wouldn't wake up (she was more a light sleeper normally) and was super tiny.

* * *

When Beca woke up the painkillers had long left her system, which resulted in major pain throbbing from her elbow.

"Oh god," she winced accidentally moving her elbow the wrong way as she climbed out of bed. She bit back the pain that shot up from her ankle when she stood up and limbed towards the en-suite bathroom.

"Hey, sleepyhead," Jesse said, looking up from his laptop when she walked into the room. "Did you sleep well?" he wondered as he set his laptop aside and got up.

"Yeah," she replied. "What time is it?" she asked, following him to the kitchen.

"Eleven-thirty," he answered. "I took the prescription from your pocket and went and go this for you earlier," he told her as he placed a drugstore bag on the counter.

"Not on empty stomach," he added when she reached for the bag.

She sighed and rested her good arm on the counter. "What is there to eat?"

"I made a pie. Want a slice?"

"Yeah, pie is nice." She nodded.

"Want a glass of milk with that?" he went on to ask slipping into the role of a waiter as he pretended to note down what she said.

"No. No, milk."

"Uh, there's orange juice."

"Orange juice it is." She sat down on a stool, thanking him when he placed a slice of pie and a glass of orange juice in front of her.

"Slow down," he mumbled, sitting next to her. "No one is chasing you."

"I'm in pain and the only thing keeping me from feeling less miserable depends on having food in my stomach," she answered.

He rubbed her back, knowing better than to try to change her mind.

Jesse grabbed the painkillers and removed the cap for her knowing she'd have trouble doing it herself with one hand while she finished inhaling the pie in record time.

"I don't remember coming here," she told him once she swallowed a couple of pills.

"That's would be because you were asleep," he answered, getting up and taking the plate and glass to wash them. While washing the dishes, he recapped what happened during her unconsciousness.

"Is Pete still here?" she wondered.

"Yup." He dried his hands with a cloth. "I checked on him a couple of times. He's okay."

She nodded and watched him walk towards the fridge and pull something from the freezer.

"For your ankle," he told her, shaking the ice pack.

She extended her hand to take it from him but he shook his head and picked her up bridal style.

"I'm awake now, I can walk."

"I know. I just like carrying you around. You're so light." He sat her down on the couch then sat down and placed her legs on his thighs. "Sorry," he apologized when she winced the moment he placed the ice pack on her hurt ankle.

"It's just cold. It didn't hurt," she clarified.

He trailed the scratches on her calve and chuckled a little thinking of how she got them.

"Shut up." She tried to kick him but he was quick to stop her.

"You gotta admit it's kinda funny."

"I can't move my arm so no it's not funny, Jesse, by any stretch."

He shrugged. "Speaking of your arm, I looked online for bone doctors in town and booked you an appointment at four-thirty."

"It's not broken, I don't get why the doctor at the hospital insisted I'd see a specialist," she grumbled.

"Because a second opinion wouldn't hurt."

"It would cost a fuck ton of money."

"You have insurance," he pointed out. "I'll get your favorite candy after the appointment." He laughed at the dirty look she gave him. "Or if you're hungry we'll go to McDonald's and get you a happy meal. I'm sure they'll buy it if you said you're twelve."

"With how often you make jokes where the punchline is me looking like a kid, I should be running as far as I can away from you."

"I don't know what you're talking about?" he faked looking guilty.

"I can't believe I fell for a pedophile. I'm gonna go lock myself up in my room and cry about it but not before I call the cops on you," she said playing along.

"And tell them what exactly? You're an adult. You consented to everything we've done. You have nothing on me." He shrugged.

"You sick bastard!" she said in her best overly dramatic voice (she drew inspiration from daytime soap opera shows her grandmother liked to watch.) "You disgust me, Jesse." She sniffled before dramatically looking away from him, surprised that she hadn't cracked.

"Oh, baby, don't cry." She felt his hand on her cheek. "This all real for me. We can make it work."

"No, I can't." She shook her head, tilting her head to look at him. "I can't be with a man who's only around because I look young and yet am legal for him to get away with liking children." She was kind of having fun with the strange scenario they were toying despite how ridiculous it was.

Beca frowned when he leaned in, breaking character for a second when he pressed his lips against hers.

"No," she mumbled as he kissed her.

"You want this. Admit it," he said in response. "You're just as messed up."

He grinned when he felt her hand cup his cheek and bring him closer as they kissed passionately before she pulled away laughing.

He joined her in the laughter. "That was really impressive," he said once their laughter died out. "I didn't know you could act."

She rolled her eyes.

"Seriously, Becs, there's some hidden talent there worth exploring." He pressed the icepack her ankle gently to avoid hurting her again.

"My drama teacher used to say that, too," she shared with him. "I did theatre in high school," she elaborated, noting the way Jesse arched an eyebrow.

"Painkillers are finally kicking in, huh?" he guessed when she sighed in delight.

"Yep."

He smiled at her, watching her lean against the couch.

"I'll come to pick you up for an appointment around four," he told her. "No need to ask one of the girls to drive you there."

"I should go home," she sighed. "They're probably freaking out."

"They called." He paused. "Well, Amy called. I could hear the rest of the girls in the background. I think I was on speaker."

"Did you tell her about my elbow?"

"Yep."

"What else?"

"Nothing. Just your elbow and how you hurt it." He knew why she asked and he'll be damned if he didn't questioned her about it. "Are you gonna tell her about us?"

"I don't know. What are we even?"

"We're best friends and lovers."

"Please don't say lovers," she injected.

"Fine, not lovers. We're best friends _who have feelings for each other_." He began making random patterns on her leg. "I didn't act on my feelings for you the first time around because I wasn't in a good place but I am now and I want to give this a shot. Do you?"

He wasn't sure why it disappointed him that she didn't blurt out 'yes.' He knew her reasons for never putting herself out there but they weren't enough for him to not feel frustrated with her.

"I want to," she mumbled, not blind to his disappointment. "But you really shouldn't."

"Why?"

"I'm a lot to deal with, dude."

"All I'm asking is for you to actually _try_." He scooted closer to her. "I'll never get why this freaks you out so much but I can try which is why I'm asking you to do the same. Can you do that?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I can try."

He closed the distance between them, kissing her. She was gripping his hair and he knew it was nerves. He didn't blame her he'd be freaking out too entering an uncharted territory.

They both broke the kiss, hearing a series of loud and aggressive sneezes.

"Good morning," Jesse said once Pete came into view. "I'm gonna go ahead and assume you're allergic to cats," he said looking between his cat and Pete.

"Yes—" Pete sneezed, confirming much. "Where's the bathroom?" he asked, sniffing.

"Down the hall."

Pete nodded and headed that way.

Jesse handed Beca the icepack and got up to open the windows and air the house.

"Where's did Thororeo go?" Beca wondered.

"In the backyard, I think." He saw her out of the corner of his eyes when she got up and turned around to face her.

"Stop looking at me like that, I can walk. It's just sprained, relax."

He watched her walk towards the kitchen, guessing she was going to check the backyard for Thororeo since the door to the backyard was in the kitchen.

"So, how did I end up here?" Pete asked, stepping out of the bathroom.

"You fell asleep in the car and I didn't feel like waking you up," Jesse answered. "Come on, you must be starved." he began walking towards the kitchen.

"How did I get from your car to the bed?" Pete frowned, racking his brain.

"I carried you to bed. You're such a heavy sleeper. Apple pie?"

"Uh, yeah, thank you. I'm sorry you did what?"

"He cradled you like a baby then tucked you to bed," Beca said entering the kitchen through the backyard door.

"It's only weird if you don't embrace it," Jesse told him.

"Well, thank you. I don't know what would have happened if I didn't bump into you last night."

"Don't worry about it, man," Jesse smiled at him, placing the slice of pie in front of Pete. "Orange juice?" he asked and was met with a nod.

"So, why did you get trashed last night?" Beca asked, sitting next to Pete.

He shrugged. "I didn't mean to get so drunk."

"Right, it just happened that you drank gallons of liquor," she deadpanned. "I invited you to have fun not to die of alcohol poisoning." She didn't want to make it about herself but she'd beat herself up with guilt if something bad had happened to him.

"I did have fun last night. Your friends are awesome."

"Then what the fuck, dude?" She lightly punched him.

He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling through the nostrils.

"Did you even stop to think about your family if something bad happened?"

"Nothing bad happened," Jesse slowly said, stepping in. "He'll drink responsibly from now on, right, Pete?"

Pete nodded rapidity while staring down at the plate in front of him.

Jesse then looked at Beca and shot her a pointed look to which she mouthed _'what?'_

He nodded at Pete and she could only translate the look in his eyes when he looked back at her as _'take it easy on him.'_

"I'm sorry things aren't okay at home. I get how that must feel. But you can't let it drive you into self-destruction. As cliché as it sounds, you need to be strong for Dan and your mom," she finally said.

"Yeah. I know that…last night won't happen again," he said, holding Beca's gaze.

"Good. Now stop staring at the pie and eat. It's really good."

"Want another slice, Becs?" Jesse wondered.

"Yeah."

"So, what happened to your arm?" Pete asked as Jesse cut a slice of pie for Beca.

"I fell and dislocated my elbow," she said.

"Ouch." He grimaced.

"Tell him why you fell, Becs," Jesse urged, holding back a smile. "Oh, wait. Pete, guess how she fell first."

"I don't know." He shrugged. "You tripped and fell down the stairs?"

"Nope. Guess again." Jesse grinned.

Beca rolled her eyes but decided to let Jesse have it. He thought it was hilarious. She'd think it's funny too if she wasn't the one that had to suffer the pain of a dislocated elbow.

"That's really sweet what you did," Pete said not even trying to hold back his laugh once Jesse told him what happen. "It really is," he insisted when she flipped him off.

"Not all heroes wear capes. Some are into scary earspikes," Jesse quipped and earned yet another eye roll from Beca.

His sense of humor wasn't that funny but overall Jesse's okay... And, things with him were going to be okay.


	22. Chapter 22

Practice when you're not partaking in the physical stuff is a whole lot more fun, Beca decided. She just sat and watched her teammates sweat and dance their asses off while she worked more on the arrangement for the semi-finals. (It was tricky to use only one hand, her weak hand that is, but she managed)

"Great job, awesome nerds," she said as they finished with rehearsals. "I'll see you all at home later. But seriously, great work!"

"Where are you off to, are you gonna skip pizza?" Fat Amy asked as soon as the leader of her team turned on her heels.

"Yeah, I have to go get ready for a thing."

"What _thing_?" Stacie casually wondered while patting herself with a towel.

"Just this thing with Jesse," she said, trying her best to sound casual. "It's no big deal."

"If it's no big deal, can't you do it after pizza?" Fat Amy questioned. Pizza after rehearsals were sacred Bella tradition that used to be frozen yogurt before Fat Amy joined the team.

"Well, no. Have fun and don't eat too much pizza. Later, nerds!" She rushed out of the auditorium to avoid any more questions about what she's doing with Jesse. They weren't trying to keep the change in their relationship secret or anything, she's just too awkward and would rather postpone it for as long as she could.

Once she made it to the Bellas' house, she showered (without wetting her hair since she couldn't exactly do anything to style it without help) then spent a good fifteen minutes staring at her closet indecisive of what she should wear. Jesse wouldn't tell her what they were doing exactly but he made the mistake of telling her to dress up _if she wanted_. (He insisted it was optional and that she could wear whatever she wanted.)

Problem was that she didn't really have any fancy clothes: her fashion sense wasn't _very diverse_ and consisted mainly of dark jeans and plaids.

"This is stupid." She shook her head, realizing that she was putting too much thought into the whole thing and went with dark jeans that were cut in the knees, a white t-shirt, and a leather jacket. The latter was mainly to draw less attention to the sling holding her arm until her elbow healed properly.

She hated feeling nervous when she heard Jesse knock on the door, so she sucked in a breath and tried to hide it.

"Hey, Hilary Swanks million dollar baby," Jesse greeted, dragging the 'hey.'

"You know you could just saying million dollar baby you don't have to reference a specific actress." He shrugged in response and held the bouquet of flowers he had in his hand towards her.

"Flowers. Really?"

"Yes." He nodded and watched her bring them to her nose after accepting them.

"They smell nice. Thank you." She smiled meeting his gaze.

Jesse then followed Beca into the house, locking the door behind him before making his way to the kitchen where she went.

"Let me," he mumbled, rushing to take the pitcher she had just pulled from the cupboard from her hand.

"Thanks," she sighed, stepping back.

He filled the pitcher with water then placed the flowers in it. "Where do you wanna put 'em?" he wondered.

"The table is fine." She shrugged and watched him put it right in the middle of the table.

"Shall we?" he gave her his arm and waited until she took before he began walking.

"So, where are we going?" she asked.

"Somewhere awesome."

"Which is," she said, encouraging him to continue.

"A surprise." He grinned when she rolled her eyes.

"I don't get why you're being all secretive."

"Because the other night at the hospital you told me to surprise you."

"I was also high on painkillers."

He shrugged as he unlocked the door for her and stepped back.

* * *

"I don't think I've ever had Mexican food that cost more than five bucks, then again I only ate from Taco Bell," Beca was saying as she eyed the menu of the upscale Mexican restaurant Jesse took her to.

She'll admit, she was impressed with his choice because she really liked Mexican food.

"I picked the place, it's my treat," he said in response.

"No, I didn't mean it that way," she shook her head. "I can split the bill. I'm just saying, I've never had any Mexican food at a fancy restaurant."

"We're not splitting the bill. It's my treat," he clarified. "You can pay for our next date if you really want," he added. "This place is supposed to have legit Mexican food, not fast food type, that's why the pricing is different."

"What makes you think there's gonna be another date?" she questioned, keeping her expression blank as she eyed the menu. She could feel his gaze so she looked up.

"A few things," he mumbled. "Like getting a taste of authentic Mexican cuisine and the other thing I have planned that will blow your mind. You won't see it coming. It's gonna be fun."

She cracked a smile at last and sarcastically said, "Can't wait."

"So, how's practice going with that thing on your arm?" he asked, gesturing at her arm.

"Practice is tricky. The girls and I decided I'd just lay back for the semi-finals."

"You won't compete?"

"I will. I'm just gonna do less dancing than them. But to cover up for that I'm gonna have to do some serious vocal bragging," she deadpanned.

"Vocal bragging?" he snorted.

"Yeah, you know? Unnecessary belting and stuff like that," she explained. "We figured it would be distracting enough from the fact that the team's soloist isn't moving as much as the rest of the team."

"I see," he nodded. "Well, you have great range, you'll do amazing."

"Thanks. And, I'm not worrying. I know I can hit high notes and whatnot; it's just hard to find songs that allow vocal bragging and also sound good, you know? I don't want to overdo it."

"I get it," he said in response. "You can't just start belting out during a pop song."

"Yup." She picked up her glass of water and took a sip. "What's up with you?" she wondered. "Written anything?" She knew he wanted to go back to writing music but was hesitant. She understood his reluctance, he was worried that he lost it—she thought it's absurd, he couldn't just lose his talent.

He just had to get back to writing music and he'd see that for himself.

"Yeah, I have," he answered in slight discomfort.

"And?"

"It's bad," he mumbled. "I told you that I don't think I know how to write music anymore." He played with the napkin in front of him.

"No shit it's bad. You haven't written anything in years, you expect to write symphony number five on the first try?" she rhetorically asked. "Shit takes practice."

"You know Beethoven?" he frowned.

"Everyone knows symphony number five," she replied then sighed when he kept looking at her. "Okay fine. Dad made me take piano lessons and I learned to play classical stuff."

"Can you play Für Elise?" he wondered.

"Yup."

"Nice," he said. "Why didn't you tell me about this before?"

"Classical music never came up." She shrugged. "Which isn't a surprise since it's a borefest."

"Excuse you, classical music rules."

"It's hard to learn that's what it is. I had a terrifying teacher. She actually managed to scare me into learning."

"How old were you?"

"As soon as I started school so like six. Dad shipped me off to grandma but still stuck his nose in what crap I just _had_ to learn," she grumbled.

"Hey, you can make extra money teaching piano yourself if you want, it's not all that bad of a skill to have under your sleeve," he pointed out. "Especially since you've had a strict teacher and would know how not to terrify a child."

"I guess I could." She paused. "I never really thought about."

"What other skills do you have that you forgot to bring up? Did you do ballet?" His eyes widened when he clocked a surprised look on her face. "I totally called it, didn't it?"

"Yeah. But unlike the piano lessons, I didn't go through with it. I cry my poor grandmother's ears off until she let me quit."

"Another shitty teacher?"

"No, I just really sucked at it. And didn't like it at all. I wanted to spend my time playing at playgrounds not getting told my posture is horrible by some French lady whom I barely understood because of her thick ass accent," she explained. "' _Close your feet and keep your head up_ , _Rebeca,_ '" she mimicked the teacher's voice, cracking Jesse up.

"Poor you," he sympathized. "I actually had to beg my parents for piano lessons," he shared with her. "I watched Immortal Beloved… a nineteen ninety-four biopic about Beethoven and I really really liked _für Elise_. I had a crappy piano toy at the time and to convince my parents that I was serious about the lessons, I learned für Elise on it."

"Für Elise isn't easy at all. Were you a music prodigy and, like, picked it up by ear?" She remembered him very clearly mentioning that he was slightly jealous she could do that very thing: it required a lot of practice to be able to identify notes by ear: she had a musical ear herself but she worked on developing it.

"I wish." He was almost convinced she's a prodigy but didn't seem to acknowledge it. "I just annoyed my babysitter—the sixteen-year-old neighbor who made the mistake of telling me she knew how to play the piano— into teaching me piano and then that piece. I practiced really hard until I learned it."

"Would you say für Elise was what got becoming a composer into your head?"

"Definitely planted the seed," he said as he nodded his head. "What about you? What's gotten you into music? I mean music production."

"Music was a huge part of my childhood even it wasn't my choice at first." She paused. "I liked playing the piano for nana. My first mash up was the ninth's symphony and Mr. Brightside when I was like twelve. It was the first time I noticed how some songs could just like mash together."

He nodded his head and smiled to himself noting the way her eyes lit up as soon as she began talking about her passion.

"I made a habit out of picking up songs that sounded good together than tried them on the piano for nana. I figured out how to mix on my laptop on my own thanks to the internet. And on my fifteenth birthday, Nana bought me mixing equipment."

"We both figured out our calling thanks to Beethoven," he noted when she went quiet. "How about that?"

"It's definitely something," she said in response.

"Tell me more about your days doing ballet," he requested because he had a feeling that there were some anecdotes relating to that period in her life.

He was right because she shared a story about the time she hid in a closet for the entirety of practice and to get out of trouble claimed she got stuck there and wasn't hiding.

He shared some stories from his childhood too. And as they ate dessert, they were exchange high school stories.

He told her how he ended up in detention after a prank that went wrong and learned something about Beca that didn't quite make sense to him.

"You never got into detention?" he said in surprise after she told him that she never got in trouble at school.

"Nope," she shook her head, amused by his reaction to her clean record.

"I find that very hard to believe."

"I'd think of a snarky reply to a teacher that would definitely send me to the principal's office or I'd wanna smack the bitch that picks on me with a volleyball in her face during PE," she sighed. "But then I'd remember that if I did any of that my poor grandmother would get called in and I didn't want that, I didn't want her to sit through whatever crap the principal would tell her about my behavior. Besides, I knew dad would act like a dick if I got into trouble and she'd have to deal with him," she explained. "So, I kept my mouth shut and ignored every asshole that bothered me at school."

"That's a lot of self-control for a teenager."

"Thanks. I'm proud of myself for making it through high school without punching someone."

"I'm surprised you got picked on at all, I wouldn't mess with you if we went to high school together."

"Well, I did theatre," she shared with him. "Oddly enough there were some girls who hated that I got certain parts and relentlessly tried to provoke me. I think their strategy was: provoke me so that I'd hurt 'em and get kicked out so that they'd get the parts. It was weird."

"I'm sorry. You did what?" His eyes widened in surprise.

"Dude, I'm in an a cappella group. Why is it such a surprise that I did theatre in high school?"

"Because you're doing a cappella because of your deal with your dad," he counted. "I mean you changed your mind about leaving but that's beside the point."

"Theatre's fun." She shrugged.

"Yeah," he agreed, drumming his fingers on the table. "Did you do musical theatre, too?" he arched an eyebrow.

"Of course, I did."

"I did musical theater, too. I can musical theater references. I could do musical theater references this whole time and I didn't know! How could you keep this from me?"

"I was expecting a similar reaction, or should I say overreaction."

"Well, what got you into it?" He was intrigued.

"It's actually what kept me from getting in trouble as cliché as that sounds."

"How so?" he frowned.

"I'd draw from the negative feelings I had at the time and just channel 'em into whatever role I played." She shrugged. "It was quite therapeutic for me."

"Why didn't you join a drama club when you got to college?" he wondered.

"I never intended to stay in college in the first place. And, right now I can barely manage my time between the Bellas, the radio station, and school. I don't think can fit another extracurricular activity." She paused. "I have less crappy feelings now than I did back in high school, I don't need therapeutic acting to deal with stuff."

She'd grown a lot since they first met and he was very proud of her for getting through over her issues.

"Gotta love how you put school last there while listing your responsibilities," he noted to which she rolled her eyes.

* * *

"I've seen enough CSI episodes to know that going to a park at night usually means people are gonna wind up dead," Beca noted as they stepped out of his car, having reached the park.

"Ha, you're funny," he retorted, grabbing a backpack from the backseat. "You should do standup, Becs, if music doesn't work out."

She smiled tightly at him before looking around them, trying to figure out why he took her to the park.

"C'mon, we're gonna be late," he mumbled, glancing at the time while readjusting the backpack's strap on his shoulder.

"Late for our serial killer?" she arched an eyebrow, hoping he'd slip and tell her the reason they were there.

She knew better than to ask him directly because he'd most certainly tell her that _it's a surprise._

"You'll see," he smiled at her.

"Hold on a second," Beca said coming to a stop once she saw the surprise for the night: a movie.

It was one of those parks and recreation things where they sometimes play films at parks free of charge.

The films played during those viewings were usually loved by the mainstream audience.

She thought she recognized the actress on the screen.

"No fucking way," Beca mumbled. "Nicholas sparks?" She tilted her head to look at Jesse who was in the process of pulling a towel from the backpack having found a decent spot: not too far away from the screen but not too close either.

"I might have suggested the movie to the committee after a generous denotation to get a better sound system," he said with a shrug. "We've missed a good chunk of the first act," he frowned, sitting down while he eyed the screen.

"Jesse, this movie sucks ass why would you ask them to play it?" she grumbled, taking a seat as well.

"Because this movie although not the greatest hold a special memory." He shrugged. "When I think back at _that day_ , your ruthless commentary of this movie is what comes to mind."

She knew which day he was talking about: it was the day he found out his ex-girlfriend who had cheated on him with a close friend had gotten engaged to the said former close friend.

She found him day drinking while listening to some depressing music and didn't know how to help.

"So does the trip we took to the tattoo shop," he continued, taking her hand and interlocking their fingers while he rubbed his finger against the side of her middle finger where she had tattooed a couple of measures from David Bowie's Rebel Rebel. "And later at your dorm room," the tone of his voice changed, it was lower and it made her feel funny.

"You didn't know how to help yet you made a really crappy day better because you cared enough to help," he then said.

Dinner felt less like what she assumed a date would be like and more like one of their usual hangout: they just talked and laughed about things.

She, of course, had avoided dating for the longest time and didn't exactly know what people talked about during first dates: she knew she would probably make it awkward if he tried to flirt and was grateful that he didn't.

As they sat shoulder to shoulder under the moonlit sky, things felt different: there wasn't a table between them, they were really close and the way he was looking at her made her feel uneasy.

It was weird: transitioning from friends who slept together on occasions to friends who were acknowledging the feelings they had for each other and were giving dating a shot was very weird.

He leaned in and she couldn't help but tilt her head, hating how awkward she was feeling.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, clenching her hand once Jesse let go of it.

"For what?" Jesse puzzled.

"Being so damn awkward." She paused. "It's just really weird."

"Weird is fine." Jesse shrugged. "You're doing fine." He rubbed her back. "Don't apologize for how you're feeling. I'm the one that should be apologizing for being so pushy." He shook his head.

"No, you aren't." She tilted her head to look at him. "Are you kidding me? Dinner was awesome. So is this, I mean I'm not a big fan of the movie but I like watching movies with you."

"Yeah, but you're uncomfortable and I pushed it just now. We're best friends. I should _know_ better. I'm sorry."

She laughed in spite of herself. "I'm not familiar with first dates or dates in general but I doubt this kind of conversation pops up during first dates."

"You're right," he agreed. "We should have had this conversation beforehand. And, it's on me because I'm—"

"—older," she finished for him.

"More _experienced._ " He frowned. "Okay, let's just talk about this and figure it out," he said, turning so he'd be facing her. "You feel weird about us," he stated. "I don't," he let her know. "But I understand why you'd feel weird," he clarified. "I don't want to make assumptions or like walk on eggshell around you, so why don't you just tell me what you'd be comfortable with and we'll go from there."

He looked at her expectantly and she knew she just had to get over herself and just talk to him.

"I don't wanna rush things but at the same time I want you, dude," she awkwardly said. "We've had sex before and it's great but it's also just sex, you know? Hooking up now won't be just sex and that honestly freaks me out. And like I know it's stupid and that I shouldn't feel this way." She sighed, feeling like she wasn't making much sense.

"It's not stupid," he disagreed. "You just need time," he figured. "Would you prefer if I don't try to initiate things?" he asked. "You take the lead with everything and you let me know when it would be okay for me to initiate things?" he suggested.

She thought about it before nodding, "Yeah, I'd like that."

"Alright then," he smiled at her. "That wasn't that hard to figure out."

"Yeah." It weirdly didn't. "I'm glad we didn't postpone this conversation."

"Me, too." He glanced at the screen. "And we didn't miss that much of the movie."

Beca looked at the movie while he turned to face the screen again. And, as his hand brush against hers, she reached for it.

He squeezed her hand when she leaned against his shoulder, "don't fall asleep."

"Don't drag me to see a movie I hate." She closed her eyes and smiled, hearing him snort in response. "You could have told me the whole thing with the movie without coming all the way here... or giving a generous donation to get some lame movie played."

"I was meaning to donate, alright? It just occurred to me that it would be a nice touch to our first date," he explained.

"You're right, lulling me to sleep in a crowded park while a movie I hate plays is a nice touch," she retorted in amusement.

"Sour patches?" he offered, stuffing his hand inside his backpack.

"Yup." She reached and grabbed a few from the bag once he opened it.

"There aren't many things we could do in town when you can't move your dominant arm, I had to make this date memorable."

"What things would have planned if I didn't have a fucked up elbow?" she wondered.

"Theme park. Mini golf. Painting class. To name a few," he cited.

"I can't paint. And, neither can you," she pointed out.

"Yeah, but that's not the point of the activity. It's fun and memorable and that's what matters." He tossed a sour patch in his mouth as someone shushed them. "sorry," Jesse apologized for talking during the movie.

"Don't apologize. They're watching a movie for free. Go rent it if you really wanna watch it," she said in a loud enough voice the person that shushed them could hear her.

"She's joking," Jesse felt the need to ingest.

"No, I'm not," she quickly added.

"Beca," Jesse called.

"Dude, I'm trying to make this date memorable," she continued in a voice only Jesse could hear.

"By getting us kicked out of a park viewing?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

Luckily whoever it was that Beca was trying to pick a fight with said nothing in response.

She didn't really hate the movie: she thought it's stupid and was vocal about her opinion of it but she didn't hate it.

Beca made it 'till the end mainly because she and Jesse spent the entirety of the runtime poking fun at the movie.

* * *

 **AN:** Hi. It's been a while, hasn't it? I know it's not much but I hope you enjoyed reading it nonetheless.


	23. Chapter 23

It's been two weeks since Beca dislocated her elbow, which meant a checkup was in order. She knew there's no way she was getting it removed on that day but still had a tiny hope her doctor would tell her that her elbow healed and that she could finally get the sling removed.

She sat down in the waiting room given the fact that the doctor was with a patient and killed time by looking at through one of the available magazines.

Beca was flipping a page when she spotted none other than Amber and her daughter who just walked into the clinic. "Beca, hi," Amber greeted once she noticed her.

"Hey, Amber." She smiled curtly at the woman before meeting Theresa's gaze. "Hey, Theresa."

The younger girl shyly waved at her.

"Here for a checkup?" Amber was saying as she sat down on the empty chair next to Beca.

"Yeah. What about you, everything alright?"

"Tree here fell from a swing and hurt the shoulder she had broken before."

"Ouch." Beca grimaced.

"It's probably not serious but gotta be sure."

"Jesse talked you into going to a specialist instead of the ER, didn't he?" Beca guessed.

"Yeah," Amber confirmed, slightly surprised.

"He worries too much," Beca added, shaking her head.

"It's both sweet and annoying," Amber sighed.

"That's basically Jesse in a nutshell: sweet but annoying," Beca replied and heard a small chuckle from Amber.

Things should be awkward between the two given the fact that they were both seeing the same guy and knew each other. Yet somehow it didn't feel as awkward as it should be.

"Well, that's me," Beca said, placing the magazine on the coffee table, and stood up when the nurse called her name.

"It's nice seeing you," Amber smiled, meeting Beca's gaze.

"You, too," Beca smiled back before turning on her heels.

Amber was too likable and it was almost impossible to dislike her. Besides the woman was quite the badass: Beca was fond of her for how much she sacrificed for her daughter. Therefore, yeah, it wasn't _that_ weird that meeting her wasn't awkward.

* * *

After the checkup where the doctor assured her that in two weeks her elbow should completely heal, Beca headed to the radio station where she spent most of the day daydreaming about what she was going to eat for dinner at her father's place.

Sheila made the best Lasagna and her cooking chops were the main reason Beca had dinner at their house at least once every two weeks. She didn't mind hanging out with them especially when they had conversations that weren't forced.

Things were going pretty well with her father and it was awesome.

They talked about a paper she was writing— having a professor for a father had its perks— and thanks to his advice and tips, she'd probably manage to finish the essay due in a couple of days soon.

"Dad, no," she shook her head.

"What do you mean no? I want to properly meet him." He frowned.

"It's new and it's not by any mean serious, you definitely don't have to meet him _properly_."

"The fact that it's new solidifies the need for us to meet. I want to know his intentions with my daughter." He shrugged.

"Dad, please." She cringed. "Don't be that guy."

"Look, I was never as present as any father must be in their child's life. I'm trying to make up for the lost years and be involved in my only daughter's life. Help me out here, Becs." He paused for a few seconds when she shook her head. "I promise that I won't scare him off. I just want to have dinner with him."

Beca blew a breath, realizing how pointless it was to postpone the inevitable. She was expecting her father to want to _meet Jesse properly_ as he put it. She just did not expect him to want to meet Jesse as soon as she told him about the change in their relationship.

"Okay, fine," she caved. "Just promise you won't make it weird."

"I promise," he smiled, glancing up when Sheila walked into the room holding dessert. "Is he allergic to any specific food? We don't want to kill the guy," he said in amusement.

"No, he doesn't have any food allergies," Beca grumbled as she started to regret telling her father about Jesse.

Sheila was cutting a slice of the cheesecake for Beca while Dr. Mitchell gave her a recap of the conversation he and Beca just had. The step-monster didn't react like her old man, which Beca really appreciate.

* * *

Beca didn't expect to find Jesse at the Bellas house when she got home but wasn't surprised.

He was there to help Stacie with some algebra homework and had just finished when Beca arrived.

"When will your elbow heal, I hate not being able _to really_ hug you," he mumbled hugging her hello.

"Doctor said hopefully in a couple of weeks," she answered, pulling away.

"I ran into Amber at the doctor's office," she shared with him and she made her way to the kitchen to get herself a glass of water.

She wasn't sure why she brought up meeting Amber abruptly.

"Yeah?"

"She was there with her daughter."

"Right." He nodded. "I suggested she went to that doctor." He leaned against the doorway.

"She said you did."

"Is everything alright?" he frowned, watching her drink water.

She nodded. "Dad wants to have dinner with you," she said next disliking the tone of her own voice as she talked about Amber and figuring she should change the subject.

"Okay." He crossed his arms across his chest. "I'm glad you listen to me and told him."

She held back a smile because she knew how terrified he was of her father. He convinced her that it would be good for her relationship with her father if she updated him on what was going on in her love life.

"Did he say when he'd like to meet?" he asked.

"In the near future." She shrugged. "If it's too much, you don't have to do it, you know?" She assured. "We've been doing this for what now? Two weeks?"

"No, it's good we have dinner together. Your father doesn't particularly like me and he should get to know me better."

"Step-monster promised me she'd keep him off of your back if he started to make it weird, you should be fine," she sighed.

"That's comforting," he mumbled and straightened up when she began walking towards the door he stood.

"You gonna go to bed now?" he wondered.

"No, not yet. I have an essay that I plan to finish and get it over with." She ran her fingers through her hair. "Why do you ask?"

"Nothing." He shrugged. "Just wanted to know if you wanna hangout. You have homework so you'll leave you to it."

"You can stay, Jesse. The essay is almost finished. It shouldn't take long. We can hang out."

He tucked her hair behind her ear. "Great. 'Cause I really want to."

She looked behind him and frowned. "Where are you off to?" she puzzled, noting that Fat Amy was making her way to the front door.

"Just going out for a smoothie," the blonde answered.

"A smoothie. Now at 9 pm?"

"Yup. Nothing weird about that. You're weird for limiting your smoothie consumption hours to the daytime hours of the day." She reached for the door and unlocked it.

"Is it me or is Amy being extra weird?" Jesse wondered.

"It's not you," Beca mumbled, staring at the door before it occurred to her that whenever Amy went for her night _smoothies_ she'd spend the night out. "C'mon. I really want to finish this damn essay and send it before the deadline just to rub it in my professor's face: Dr. Mitchell's lazy daughter isn't as lazy as he thinks." She began making her way to the stairs.

"Did he say that to you?"

"Yup. He called me out in an amphitheater full of students."

"Dickhead."

"Well, in his defense, he did catch me napping in class," she informed.

* * *

Jesse gave her a foot massage while she worked on her essay.

She then gave him her laptop to proofread what she had written before she emailed it to her professor.

"What do you wanna do?" She asked while stretching after she closed her laptop.

"I don't know." He watched her climb out of bed to put her laptop on her desk.

"I just wanna hangout. We don't have to do anything really." He shrugged.

"I have pot," She mentioned before she groaned, "But I don't have rolling paper or a bong. Amy broke the one I had."

"And I don't do well with pot brownies."

"No pot then." She climbed on the bed when he reached out a hand.

"How have you been?" he asked, wrapping her in his arms as he leaned against the headboard.

"Okay," she replied. "School is a bit of a pain in the ass but I'm managing."

"You're smart as hell. Just don't half-ass as much as you do and you'll do exceptionally well in school."

"Thanks, man."

He placed a peck on her head in response.

"I started writing and I don't think it's half as bad," he shared with her.

"Can you play me some of it?" She requested, tilting her head to look at him.

"Oh, it's not that kind." He chuckled a little. "I'm working on a play."

"A play?" She arched an eyebrow.

"Uh-huh." He smiled. "It's a musical. But haven't started on the musical parts yet. I got a few books on playwriting and I'm having fun with it."

"Okay." She was a bit surprised.

"I'm feeling it, you know? I want to try it and if it doesn't go anywhere it's fine. I'm doing it for fun."

"I'm glad you're doing this." She leaned up and kissed him.

"I have an idea," she told him, breaking the kiss. "I have a test coming up in a few days that I was planned to prep for the night before, how about I do that now and you help me out."

"Sure. What's the test about?" he wondered, sitting up when she climbed out of the bed and went to retrieve some of her notes from her desk.

"Irish lit," she shared with him.

"Tell me again why you majored in comparative literature and not something related to music?"

"The only music relate major is all theoretical and it's extremely boring. I like literature, the subjects aren't that hard, and dad made it sound less boring than it actually is." She shrugged, placing the notes on the bed. "I made these flashcards the other day to avoid falling asleep in class. I was planning to use them the night before the test to study for it, you're gonna quiz me."

"Got it." He picked up the cards to go through them. "Did you make these during the professor that called you out for falling asleep's class?" She nodded in response. "He counts attendance and I really don't want to give him any reason to fail me."

"Out of spite not because you care about his class, of course," he figured.

"Duh," she retorted. "So, I just need to go through my notes one time then you quiz me."

He nodded his head, still reading the flashcards.

"And, here's this: if I get let's say three answers right in a row, you take something off."

He arched an eyebrow, looking up. "And if I answer wrong three times in a row, I take off something." She got up and quickly locked the door to avoid any of the girls walking in on them.

"How much time do you need to go over your notes?" he wanted to know.

"Half an hour." She shrugged.

"You sure it's enough?"

"Dude, you should want me to do badly on this quiz."

"Yes. That I do. But I want you to do well on your test."

He entertained himself by playing a game on his iPhone until 30 minutes went by and it was time for the quiz.

Beca put her notes away and cracked her knuckles, "bring it on, nerd."

He sat up and cleared his throat before he launched into the questions he was holding.

Clothes came off, from both parties throughout the quiz. And as he read the last question, they were both in their underwear.

If she answered right, he'd take off his boxer shorts.

"You're gonna ace your test, Beca," he said as he began removing his underwear.

"Thanks." She watched him toss his underwear on the floor.

"Now what?" he wanted to know, aware that she was checking him out.

" _Now_ , I thank you for helping me prepare for a test that should have been extremely boring to study for," she answered and moved closer to him.

"I'm glad I helped," he mumbled as she leaned in to kiss him.

Things got steamy quite fast and it wasn't much of a surprise: they were taking it slow and as a result, they hadn't slept together yet.

"Bet it's a lot of work to maintain all this," she mumbled as she felt his torso, pulling away to catch her breath.

"Yeah. It's not just for show, working out feels good. We should work out together sometime."

"Hard pass. It's great to look at the results of your hard work, though."

He chuckled and slipped his hand under the hook of her bra but didn't try to unhook it, he just rested his hand there as she leaned in to kiss him.

She reached and unhooked herself, breaking the kiss they were sharing to take it off then tossed it on the floor.

"Jess?" She called and he had to tear his eyes away from her chest that he couldn't wait to touch.

"Yeah."

"I want you," she mumbled while maintaining eye contact.

"You, too, Becs." He held his hand up for a high five. "Up top."

She rolled her eyes and high fived him, fully aware that he was trying to make her feel less awkward with his high five.

"We can stop if you change your mind," he let her know as he flipped them so he was on top of her. "At any time."

She nodded in response.

* * *

"Dude," she called, trying to catch her breath after she came from oral. "That was awesome," she mumbled the last word because his mouth covered hers.

She frowned but didn't mind that his tongue reached her throat.

He was a man on a mission; she thought it was just talk when he whispered in her ear all dirty things he planned to do to her.

However, he clearly meant it and she couldn't complain. She planned to reciprocate of course.

It was around 1 am when they finished.

Sex never lasted that long before: the sex marathon they once did earlier on in their friends-with-benefits relations doesn't count.

Another that never happened before did: She came from intercourse.

"I need to change the sheets," she said once she caught her breath. "I also need to shower but I don't think I can do either of those things."

Jesse pulled her into his side. "You need to sleep." He placed a peck on her temple.

She used his sweaty chest as a pillow and could feel herself falling asleep in no time.

* * *

The next day, Beca couldn't wake up on her own if she tried. She felt like she had the longest and hardest workout session. If it were to her, she'd spend the whole day in bed.

Jesse woke her up an hour before she had classes and she really wanted to hate him for it but couldn't.

He changed the bed sheets then started on breakfast while she got ready for the day.

"Just in time for breakfast," Jesse said when Beca stepped into the kitchen.

He placed a batch of pancakes on the counter.

"You left your phone upstairs." She handed him his cellphone and he shoved it in his pocket without looking at it.

"Why are we the only ones up?" he wondered, noting the quietness of the house.

"None of the girls have morning classes today." She shrugged.

"Amy didn't come home last night," he noted. "Did you check up on her?"

"She's fine," she assured him and didn't fight the smile that crept on her face when he placed a kiss on her cheek.

"I'm really glad you stayed over last night." She played with his t-shirt.

"Me, too." He rubbed her arm. "Thank you for last night."

"No, thank you." She poked his chest. "You're responsible for a lot of my _firsts_. I hope you're happy about that."

"I mean, it doesn't hurt to know." He grinned and watched her walk past him. "But if we're being real, it's not really me that _made_ it happen. We did," he pointed out as he pulled the maple syrup from the fridge while she grabbed a couple of mugs from the cupboard.

"I'm glad it happened with me, though," he added. "It's nice."

"It really is," she agreed.

They both tilted their heads when they heard someone get into the house.

"Good morning, Amy," Jesse greeted.

"Hello, Swanson," she said in response. "Fellow roommate." She nodded in Beca's direction before she began making her way in the direction of the stairs.

"Wanna follow her next time she goes out for a night smoothie?" Jesse wondered, taking a sip of coffee.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I really do."

"Call me, we'll go together."

"I will." She sat down to eat some of the pancakes he made.

He pulled his phone from his pocket to go through his unanswered emails and text messages and replied to some of them. Seeing that Amber texted him the night before reminded him of how something seemed off with Beca when she mentioned running into Amber.

"Hey, Beca," he called breaking the comfortable silence they got in as they had breakfast. "You're cool with me seeing Amber, right?"

"We've been through this. Yes, Jesse. It's fine." She shrugged, her eyes never leaving the pancakes in front of her.

It wasn't fine, not really. She just said it was because it should be fine. "Not because we're giving this." She gestured between them. "A shot, you have to end your thing with Amber," she said. "If it gets serious between us things would be different but for now I don't see why you should stop seeing her… unless you want to."

"I just figured I'd check with you again. Because you sounded weird yesterday when you mentioned how you two met at the doctor's office."

He didn't want to end things with Amber and it was okay. She knew how much he liked Amber. He told her himself how much he liked her.

She didn't want him to choose between them. She meant what she said: they weren't serious and it's not worth ending things with Amber.

It didn't mean she was okay with it or that it didn't suck. However, she couldn't bring herself to tell him how she truly felt about the fact that he was seeing someone else because having strong feelings for each other didn't mean they'd work as a couple.

"It's weird but it's also fine. Weird is fine." She shrugged.

"Okay." He smiled at her and she was both glad and bummed out that he believed her.

* * *

 **AN:** I go AWOL on you for months then update this twice in a week. Let me know what you think of this chapter and what you want to see happen in forthcoming chapters.


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